In Need...

Hey Amelia - I've had the same issues. But here I am back on today and I found you. Sooooo, here we both are, back and ready to be motivated. Please add me as a friend and we can support each other. Also, that June 2013 goal...completely reachable!

LOG everyday - share your diary to stay honest. I noticed when I shared, I had the best results.

This is your problem...

You expect others to do this for you. No one is accountable for your behaviors except you. Do it or don't. It doesn't matter whether other people are working out with you. They can't burn your calories for you.

You only want to do this on the good days. I weigh myself every single day. Every. Single. Day. Some days I weigh more than others. Some days I can predict that I won't like the number on the scale. The number on the scale is related to my behavior in the days prior. No matter how bad I think that number will be, I get on the scale. Every. Single. Day.

You only want to do this when it's easy. Exercising isn't easy. Especially if you're doing it right. It hurts, it makes you tired, it makes you sweaty, and it takes up time that you could be doing something easy. Motivating yourself to go to the gym, or go for a run is much harder than sitting on the couch.

I would "like" a lot of things, and I would "like" them to happen now. But, quite frankly, I'm not willing to do what it takes to make some of those things happen. I am willing to do what it takes to make other things happen. I also realize that the things that are the most worthwhile are often the hardest and take the longest time.

It sounds like you need to decide how much you would like to lose weight. Would you like to lose it enough to do hard things? Or would you rather just take it easy and be happy the way you are? Neither choice is right or wrong, and you are the only one who can decide and then act on your decision.

Thanks... I wasn't trying to be mean, and I'm glad you got that.

I started by setting out small behavioral changes. I've lost weight and gained it back 100 times in my life. Every time I gained it back was because of 2 things: I stopped weighing myself every day, and I stopped tracking what I was eating. I finally just decided to get over the shame and guilt of not being perfect. I decided to keep my eyes open and expect less of myself (yes, less of myself, not more.) No matter how "good" or "bad" I've been, I log what I eat and I get on the scale in the morning. If the scale is up a few pounds, it is. At least I know. I'm not pretending that things are better or worse than they are.

My counselor helped me with the working out thing. Think about it this way:

I'm guessing you work or go to school, right? Do you leap out of bed when your alarm clock rings in the morning and think, "Wow, I can't wait to go to work today!" I never do. I like my job alright once I get there, but I never really want to go. If I could choose, I'd stay in bed. But, I do like the results of going to work every day. I like having a nice house, food to eat, vacations, a car... I like that my boss and the staff that I supervise appreciate that I am dependable and show up every day. I like not getting in trouble for not showing up all the time.

Now, I treat working out the same way I treat my job. I rarely WANT to go to the gym or for a run. But, once I'm there and doing it, I'm okay. I like the results -- both physical and emotional. I feel really proud of myself for going and pushing myself. I like being strong. I like being able to run farther than I ever have before. I like the way my body has changed. I like not feeling guilty for not going. Therefore, I don't let myself talk myself out of it. I plan my workouts for the week and I go. Just like work. I also have back-up plans in case my initial plan doesn't work. If I planned to go to the gym, but my daughter is sick, then I have to do a kettle bell workout at home. If I was going to run, but overslept, then I hit the gym later that night. I don't accept excuses from myself. I find enough time to watch tv and be online, so I certainly can find time for a workout.

One thing that really helps is separating your behavior from your results. You control your behavior. You don't always control the immediate results. Log your food, weigh yourself and exercise no matter what the scale says. If you stick with your behaviors, you will see results!

Gosh, I am soo right there with you!! Hey, I am there now.