Negative feedback after weight loss...
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I had people ask me if I was sick...like cancer or something. It has been a couple of years now so no one says anything at all now. That is kind of hard, too. Maintaining and working so hard to do that and no one says a thing because they are used to you looking this way and cannot remember you when you were fat.
D0 -
they liked you before your weight loss because they are jealous of the new you.
I agree this is probably the reason.0 -
52 lost for my my grandma always told me how fat i was and yes after looking back I was big 260 pounds 5'6 now at 207 pounds still wanting to loose about 30-40 more pounds total my grandma tells me i still look disgusting and i cant wait to loose that extra 35 pounds so i can stroll in on Christmas with all my doubting family and say neener neener :-)0
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I just went to your profile and looked at your pictures. Jealousy has got to be it. You are losing weight and becoming a wonderful curvy girl with the curves eveyone wants to have in all the right places! I say use if for motivation.
I want to lose and have curves like you! Good luck as you continue your journey to good health!0 -
Oh i hear that!!! I was always the skinny one in the family so when I gained weight they were all too happy to rub it in my face. I would love to rub it right back in their face at the next family gathering and do the neener neener right with you!!52 lost for my my grandma always told me how fat i was and yes after looking back I was big 260 pounds 5'6 now at 207 pounds still wanting to loose about 30-40 more pounds total my grandma tells me i still look disgusting and i cant wait to loose that extra 35 pounds so i can stroll in on Christmas with all my doubting family and say neener neener :-)
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My BF actually said he thought I looked older and wrinkle when I got skinner and that he didn't like it so much.. it hurt to hear it and he has later said that what he really reacted to, was that I'd changed. He just needed time to adjust to the new me. Took me some time to get over the remark though.
I've also gotten the 'you're getting too skinny' snide remarks. But I try to avoid letting it get to me. Usually it's from people who don't know what it's all about. Just forget them. They don't understand.0 -
So I've lost a total of 40.4 pounds from the beginning of March to now, although my ticker says 3 pounds because I just recently joined MFP. Well, the other day someone said (about me): "Oh yeah, i don't like the way she looks now that she's lost weight... she doesn't look good. I liked how she looked better before." Well it's a good thing I'm not trying to get fit and healthy for others, I'm doing this for myself :-) But wow, what a mean thing to say huh? Has anyone received any negative feedback after successfully losing a significant amount of weight?
Screw them, this is usually a sign of jealousy. It's YOUR body, remember.
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Ha! That's sooo true... my family and some friends tell me I'm "thin"... but I'm only "thin" in comparison to what I looked like before. But in comparison to the average sized girl, I'm still on the heavy side...lol. After losing my first 20 pounds, my mom told me to stop because I was beautiful just like I was and said I didn't need to lose more weight, I came to the conclusion that she was having "fatty Patty" withdrawals ;-)
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Your mom is right you were beautiful, but your still beautiful, healthy and happier. Im jealous of you but in a good way, Im happy for you. You were beautiful in your before pictures, but the after is the real you the person you want to be and that is awesome. Dont let any one try to make you feel any different, you worked hard and you accomplished it. Yeah haters will hate, some how it makes them feel better about themselves, I never could understand that. All I can say is you look awesome and keep making youself happy, you deserve to be.0 -
52 lost for my my grandma always told me how fat i was and yes after looking back I was big 260 pounds 5'6 now at 207 pounds still wanting to loose about 30-40 more pounds total my grandma tells me i still look disgusting and i cant wait to loose that extra 35 pounds so i can stroll in on Christmas with all my doubting family and say neener neener :-)
ooh, sometimes i'd like to say neener neener to my nan, but i could never say neener neener to my nan because even though she sometimes deserves a neener neener, she's my nan!0 -
she was having "fatty Patty" withdrawals
Lots of people do not take to change very well. Change causes them stress. People have this image of you for a long enough time that when you change, they feel threatened and lash out. I think that the person that said that they liked you the way you were had become comfortable with the before you. That you makes sense to them. Then you decide without their permission, to change their world order. How dare you!
Don't take it too seriously. It will take time for these "haters*" to realize that you are still you. Keep doing what you're doing and everybody else will just need to deal.
* I don't like this label since it's often misapplied. If this person was really a hater, she would have been hating on you before your weight loss.0 -
Not lost a lot of weight but toned up. Mother congratulated me on my weight loss and said I was looking a lot better...
Before pointing out my beer gut and making b1tchy comments about stretch marks on my thighs. Ever supportive, that one.0 -
Ive had a lot of friends commenting on my FB pics:
"Gross"
"Um...wow....first you cut your hair..now this..whats next....leaving nick for a woman"
"Young lady, you need to be more feminine"
Great, thanks....
I feel your pain.0 -
Ive had a lot of friends commenting on my FB pics:
"Gross"
"Um...wow....first you cut your hair..now this..whats next....leaving nick for a woman"
"Young lady, you need to be more feminine"
Great, thanks....
I feel your pain.
Wow, those are some harsh statements! I think you look awesome, you're very beautiful (with long hair and without) and you have amazing abs! :-) Keep up the good work!0 -
I just cannot believe the things people say. I was recently told by two different people that I shouldn't lose anymore weight from my face. We have a choice where the weight comes off?? Geez....I didn't know that....lol0
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I used to get stupid little comments about how I was always the one to eat the cookies / cupcakes, etc at work..."are you feeling ok...you USED to like my cookies???" ..." OH...he's too healthy to have a cupcake..." Eventually it stopped, and the fat people clique at work disowned me because they thought, I thought I was better than them.
I really was just sick of being fat, so i did something about it.0 -
I definitely think it's jealousy! Some people get upset when they see others doing the things they don't have the courage or will power to do. I've had little snippy comments made to me. Things like "well if you lose weight you'll lose all your curves," "you're way too hard on yourself, you look awesome," and my personal favorite: "I don't know if you have low self esteem or if you're doing this for someone else, but I think you look good as you are." These things amuse and motivate me. I'm 263 pounds, there's nothing cute or healthy about that. I've lost around 21 pounds so far, and I'm doing this for me-not for anyone else.0
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they liked you before your weight loss because they are jealous of the new you.
BINGO!0 -
I got the same response a few years back, after losing weight that, like you, made me HEALTHY. People can be jerks. Just remember why you did it and that they're probably jealous!! You are gorgeous, don't ever forget it!
Hey thanks, I figure for some people its just a matter of getting used to the new me. Either way, I'm so happy I've done this and so proud of myself.... yayy! :-) And thanks for the compliment ;-)0 -
My boyfriend has told me, "what are you going to do if you get too skinny and I'm not attracted to you anymore?"
It's a real bummer that some people can't just be happy for you.
Did you say, "Well then I will have no difficulty finding someone else who will be..." heeheee. What a jerk though, you shoulda smacked him upside the head! lol0 -
I just went to your profile and looked at your pictures. Jealousy has got to be it. You are losing weight and becoming a wonderful curvy girl with the curves eveyone wants to have in all the right places! I say use if for motivation.
I want to lose and have curves like you! Good luck as you continue your journey to good health!
Oh thank you... still working on reducing the size of some of those curves...hahaha. So yes, my journey towards good health shall continue .. :happy:0 -
Girl, that's normal. They're called haters! I got tons. If you got haters you're doing something right! Later, those who criticize you now will come and ask you how you're doing it!
^^^ this!! I've lost over 90 pounds (ticker doesn't reflect because I reset for a smaller goal) but people at work that used to talk to me all the time stopped, gave me the furry eyeball, then eventually asked me what I was doing...lol. It might take them awhile but hopefully they will realize you are still the same person inside, it's just your shape that changed. 0 -
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:After about 40 or 50 pounds lost I had a very good friend take me aside while she was drunk to beg me to quit dieting before I got smaller than her.
I'm pretty happy that, at the same weight and height, I now wear one pant size smaller than her.
Wow. I guess it would be easier for everybody else to change so I look good instead of me actually having to work at it.0 -
Well done on your weight loss you look great :0). Screw what other ppl say they're just jealous and as someone said b4 they will be asking you soon how you lost it.
I myself have lost over 50lb and get the comments. "Dont lose anymore weight " "are you hungry " etc. WTF... no I am not hungry I am always eating just I make better decisions with my food.
I had to have my engagement ring resized because of my weight loss, like 6 sizes smaller and the guy behind the counter says to my fiance who I have been with for 12 and a half years. "Wow you must be pleased"!!! What the... Jeez wot sort of comment is that. My fiance who has been with me when I was at my lightest and at my heaviest was shocked.
You ROCK so let the haters hate and you keep doing what your doing :0)))0 -
the initial phase of weight loss often generates praise, and the later stages sometimes generate concern. i've experienced this myself; "dude, how much weight are you going to lose?" i replied that i chose a weight for my frame in the middle of the Met Life actuarial charts from the late 1940s. this gives me a BMI in the 22 range, which is healthy, assuming you're not extremely tall or a bodybuilder.
That has been my experiece thus far! At first when I was bigger then everyone else they were like good for you you lost 5Lbs. Now its like HOW much weight do you plan on losing its not healthy etc. I have family who I was once bigger then and now smaller then stop talking to me.0 -
Girl, that's normal. They're called haters! I got tons. If you got haters you're doing something right! Later, those who criticize you now will come and ask you how you're doing it!
^^^ this!! I've lost over 90 pounds (ticker doesn't reflect because I reset for a smaller goal) but people at work that used to talk to me all the time stopped, gave me the furry eyeball, then eventually asked me what I was doing...lol. It might take them awhile but hopefully they will realize you are still the same person inside, it's just your shape that changed.
One of the good things about my weight loss is that I was recently contacted by a few people who I never really spoke to before other than a brief "hello" or "goodbye" and they have approached me to ask if I can help them reach their weight loss goals... so that feels good because I woulda never thought little old me would be giving out this sort of advice.. :blushing:0 -
Well done on your weight loss you look great :0). Screw what other ppl say they're just jealous and as someone said b4 they will be asking you soon how you lost it.
I myself have lost over 50lb and get the comments. "Dont lose anymore weight " "are you hungry " etc. WTF... no I am not hungry I am always eating just I make better decisions with my food.
I had to have my engagement ring resized because of my weight loss, like 6 sizes smaller and the guy behind the counter says to my fiance who I have been with for 12 and a half years. "Wow you must be pleased"!!! What the... Jeez wot sort of comment is that. My fiance who has been with me when I was at my lightest and at my heaviest was shocked.
You ROCK so let the haters hate and you keep doing what your doing :0)))
Oh yeah, I'm sooo wearing my wedding ring on my middle finger right now. It falls off on my ring finger, waaay tooo big! That's when I really felt like I was losing weight, when my fingers started feeling skinnier :-D Great feeling...
And wow, can't believe that guy would say something like that, what an a-hole!0
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