I have trouble keeping on track when my partner is around

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TashieMoto89
TashieMoto89 Posts: 2
in Health and Weight Loss
I keep to my diet pretty well when my partner isn't around. It's long distance so this is alot of the time. But when he is around he always wants chocolate and snacks and we eat out alot. Since he has moved closer this is now more often. I need some advice about how to resist this things. I want to participate with him and enjoy our time together but I go from 1400 calories roughly a day up to 2500 and above when hes around. I need to deal with this now before we move in together which we are considering. I have done so well up till now but these weekends are making me go backwards.

Replies

  • dsjohndrow
    dsjohndrow Posts: 1,820 Member
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    Track it, say no thanks, and learn what restaurants you can find lower calorie dishes at. IE: Olive Garden has an apricot chicken dish that is 450 I think. You skip the bread, and keep the salad to one dish and you win.

    It's your life, not a diet.
  • ImaFitMormon
    ImaFitMormon Posts: 31 Member
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    It is NOT easy for sure. You just have to decide that you are doing it with or without your partner there. I lost 100 lbs and my sweet husband ate the way he always has the whole time! It's difficult but possible! I wrote about it on my blog. http://www.makefatcry.com
  • determined_01
    determined_01 Posts: 147
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    That's how I am with my husband on his days off from work. I feel like when he's making dinner he's annoyed and bothered by the fact that I want him to measure what he's adding so I can log in a recipe and keep track the way I should. I also feel like I give into sweet more, it's routine for us to have ice cream or klondike bars after dinner every night when he's home. Luckily for me he works nights and leaves at 1pm and doesn't get home til midnight but his nights off are friday and saturday and those are the days where the extra sugar sneaks in and things get lackadaisical. I feel a lot people go through this with partners that aren't supportive or get annoyed with the "obsession" of the MFP user. Keep your head up and try to fight those urges!
  • izzybizzy92
    izzybizzy92 Posts: 2
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    You need to have a serious conversation with him. I have had the same experience with my ex boyfriend. He had an incredibly fast metabolism and could eat anything under the sun and still maintain his waif like physique. Finally after having to fake eating ice-cream with him and trying to hide that I couldn't eat like him I told him blank that I can't do this. If he really loves you he will understand, and either not eat those snacks around you, or not pressure to snack with him. I'm not sure if it's he wants you to eat with him, or because the snacks are in front of you you have to have them! Just tell him how important it is for you to stay on track. If he is a big snacker, opt for other snacking options. He can have his chocolate, and you can snack on dark chocolate or nuts.

    Definitely don't eat out...that packs on so many calories. It's more romantic and fun to make your own food anyway.

    Hope this helped.
  • annabellj
    annabellj Posts: 1,337 Member
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    a little bit of tweaking is necessary. does he not have any issues with his weight? if not, then find out what foods he likes that you dont for snacks that you might keep around but you wont eat. thats what i do. the kids can have ice cream, not a problem for me, but chocolate would be. i cant make brownies cuz i would eat them all. and we rarely go to mexican places cuz i cant resist the chips. just say to him gently that you are really focusing on your goals right now and would appreciate it if I got some help. im sure he would be happy to readjust to make you happy. if that doesnt work, just say im gonna get fat really quick if we keep this up!
  • Sam_NZ07
    Sam_NZ07 Posts: 2
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    I have the same issue with my husband in the evening and on the weekends. He has an active job and often comes home starving. I found it good to sit down and talk things through with my husband and once he knew how I was feeling about it he was much more concious of where we go to eat out and not putting pressure on me to have the same as him. I found that keeping a bottle of water with me at all times helped as I could take a swig of water instead of picking at the snacks he had. Then if we went to the movies I would take a lower calorie treat when he ate chips and candies, like flavoured rice crackers, frozen grapes and 1 or 2 marshmellows. Always remember that you shouldn't be matching your meal size to his - that is the hardest thing for me to remember.
  • neverstray
    neverstray Posts: 3,845 Member
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    Ha. I'm the opposite. Without witnesses, I can go crazy. Usually, with a GF, I am much better.
  • sleepygirl38
    sleepygirl38 Posts: 114 Member
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    This was an issue I had that I ended up using as an excuse way too long. My husband does not eat healthy portion sizes at all and everyone dumps their left overs on his plates. I pretty much am ready to strangle our whole family for encouraging him to overeat. But I can not change him. I can onlyy change myself. I dont force him to go on walks with me, I do invite him and he comes occassionally. He knows what I use myfitnesspal for because I am pretty open about it. So I say be open about your health goals and say sometimes you want to stay at home and eat to make something healthier. Do activities where it is a light workout. Today me and my husband went to a biker ralley and got a light hour of walking in.
  • Paul_greencastle_ind
    Paul_greencastle_ind Posts: 5
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    The same goes here, but I use my wife habits as a motivation for me. I watch what she eats, (she has lost 55lbs) and I make sure I eat less than her. I dont know how she eats alot of the stuff that packs it on me and it drives me crazy to see her eat things I do not but I always just congratulate myself on not giving it.

    Neding Friends so please add me!!!

    Paul
  • sleepygirl38
    sleepygirl38 Posts: 114 Member
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    Also when we eat out, I immediately ask for a box and put half the meal in the box. Then I dont feel guilty about what I do eat. At home, if we have hamburger helper that we used to split half and half, my husband now puts some for my lunch for the next dat and gives me a healthy size for dinner
  • marcenepea
    marcenepea Posts: 364 Member
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    Try cooking more meals at home. When you have ice cream can you have skinny cow or Weight Watchers versions? Research the restaurants you go to before hand and try to pick healthy choices. And Plan ahead, My husband is pretty supportive and eats what I cook for the most part.

    Occasionally however he wants special things. Like tomorrow night he has friends coming over to watch a football game. And he has requested fried chicken and mashed potatoes and gravy. So I have to plan ahead, Save calories for dinner and plan on having a large salad with dinner with salsa for dressing I think. And hopefully before everyone gets here I can fit in some excersize to help.

    Just do your best and make small changes as you go. Its hard sometimes when everyone else is eating all that fattening food and it looks so yummy.
  • knightreader
    knightreader Posts: 813 Member
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    Also when we eat out, I immediately ask for a box and put half the meal in the box. Then I dont feel guilty about what I do eat. At home, if we have hamburger helper that we used to split half and half, my husband now puts some for my lunch for the next dat and gives me a healthy size for dinner

    "i don't know why they call this stuff hamburger helper...it does fine just by itself."
  • mrykyldy2
    mrykyldy2 Posts: 96 Member
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    I have to agree with previous posts, that you do need to have a serious talk with him. He needs to understand what you are trying to do for yourself. If you are going to a sit down restaraunt, you will find that the cooks are pretty accomodating. Not too often do they get to be creative for anyone at work. When I go into a restaraunt what I will do is find something that is grilled and ask that they use no more than 1 teaspoon of oil and use what ever spices they want ask for lots of veggies and no potato or rice. Don't want the carbs and it is usually batch cooked anyways. If they don't have anything like that, I ask if I can order a special plate as I am on a very strict eating plan per doctors orders. Many places will do so to get your money, it may cost you a little extra but worth it. Again I ask that my protein be grilled with max 1 tsp of oil, the veggies steamed with no butter, and they have free use of spices. I have gotten some really good food doing that, plus the cooks love to play with various cooking methods of food.
  • Jobe72
    Jobe72 Posts: 24 Member
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    I am the same. My husband works away. I started my "healthier living 2 weeks ago and lost 6 kgs. He's back this week and I've put on 1.6kgs. It's nothing he does, He doesn't eat the wrong things all the time. I just seem to want to eat the wrong things when he's around.
  • AZKristi
    AZKristi Posts: 1,801 Member
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    You can definitely eat out and date while watching what you eat. Just choose your menu item wisely and only eat half of it. Save what is left for lunch the next day.

    Or, next time he suggests going out to eat, suggest a romantic night in. Cook something at home - wearing something sexy that you could never leave the house in. He'll never want to go out to eat again!

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