Help please.

smeghani
smeghani Posts: 11 Member
in Motivation and Support
Hello All!
So I needed some insight and some motivation to get me started on my weight loss goals.
I am 25yrs old and I am 153 pounds.
I am currently doing a desk job so I am mostly sitting throughout the day.
I use to be very skinny until I graduated high school and then I gained 30 pounds in 7 years.
Most of it was because I found my special someone in the beginning years and got too comfortable and went out to eat all the time. Plus back in school I was in dance team and all so I never really gained a whole lot of weight.
After reaching 140lbs in 2009 and trying every single “diet” out there I got really depressed and went through a very hard time where I found comfort in food and friends in the wrong way and gained an additional 10 pounds.
I am embarrassed of my weight, I feel like my weight is contributes to all the problems in my life and If I can just lose 20 pounds I will be happy.
One of my friends use to make me eat out all the time with her and she was 175 pounds and now recently lost all the weight and is not 114. I am happy for her but sad for myself.
I was so embarrassed of the way I look, I stopped talking to my soon to be fiancé and I stopped going to family gatherings because everyone in my family is skinny.
The doctor also told me that my LDL cholesterol is very and I am so embarrassed of that because I am only 25!
I am very sad and depressed and I feel like my weight is taking over my life. I have tried everything. I have gym membership at work and at a gym by the house. I have a home gym too. I have access to all the healthy meals and I have time too! I dont know what is but I just love food and I give up easily.
I use to be the most fashionable girl out there and now my US size 8 pants are not fitting me anymore.
I pray everyday for strength to achieve my goals. Please can some share some advice or help me. Thank you

Replies

  • beckywhite123
    beckywhite123 Posts: 2
    i no how you feel im 42 weigh 180 n i love to eat so im there with u but if we keep pushing we will get there
  • smeghani
    smeghani Posts: 11 Member
    @beckywhite I really hope so. I am barely hanging on but I am ready to lose this weight.
  • gmtdee
    gmtdee Posts: 3
    I know how you feel.
    I've just decided to rejoin myfitnesspal.
    Over the last year, i've put on 10lb's.
    I just looked at the scales and had a bit of a heart attack after seeing i was at 150lbs!!
    Not great for 16, it seems over the past few years the weight has stopped falling off like it used to!
    i'm surrounded by skinny people- i swear all my family can eat what they want and not show it!
    I really want to lose the weight as well, just to feel more confident in photos and stuff..
    It's good to see someone feels the same :)
    I'm definitely going to commit to doing something about it though! :)
  • smeghani
    smeghani Posts: 11 Member
    @gmtdee I am also glad to know that someone out there feels the same way I do. What are you going to do about it? What is your plan? Please do share with me :)
  • gmtdee
    gmtdee Posts: 3
    being prepared the night before, so that i don't just grab unhealthy food from the shop.
    Also, me and my friend are going running together, so we can keep each other motivated :)
    Really, i feel like I need to be really honest with myself about what i'm eating- so hopefully this should help with that..
  • Treece68
    Treece68 Posts: 780 Member
    If you have access to all of these things then I don't know why you are not doing it. Don't think it's magic and you will see results in a week it is a long slow process. I love food I eat it and stay in my calorie range. I don't know what yours is but I have 1600 a day some times I eat a cookie some times I don't. Calories in Calories out and work out at least 3-4 times a week. If you want it you just have to do it.
  • gmtdee
    gmtdee Posts: 3
    I suppose it takes motivation to get going initially, but you are fortunate enough to have gym access, so make the most of it! maybe thinking of me jogging around in the freezing English rain will help! Lol :)
  • smeghani
    smeghani Posts: 11 Member
    @treece you are right my problem is that I lack motivation and I need to get that going for me. I have this all or Nothing attitude which is basically driving me down and that is why I have not been able to lose weight and I need to lose this attitude and bring on the attitude that every little thing helps and that eventually it will make a difference
  • smeghani
    smeghani Posts: 11 Member
    @gmtdee haha yes I suppose that might help that I'm jogging in the cozy gymwhile you're running around in the rain lol I hope you have a good run and please do add me as a friend so we can keep in touch and help each other out :-)
  • adagolden
    adagolden Posts: 146 Member
    I think that you can feel better that you are not alone here. All of us have felt bad about how we look at some point and we are all here because we are committed to getting healthier and making changes for the better, so good job that you are here!

    It's hard to get going at first, but once it becomes a routine it's easier to stick with it. And seeing results helps too. The best advice i can give you is to plan ahead. Plan your meals the night before, pack your lunches, snacks etc so you are not tempted to snack. Keep healthy munchies at your desk (veggies, humus, guac, almonds, etc). Also, try to schedule in your exercise time, then you know what you need to do. Even a walk on your lunch break is better than nothing.
    And you will hear it a ton here, but keep track of everything. I find it so helpful to look back and see what worked and what didn't in terms of eating and/or exercising. Who cares if you go over at first...you have to have some trial and error to learn what works for you.
    Finally, set small goals for yourself. Big ones are tough to meet and are likely to make you frustrated when it's harder to meet them. For example, set a goal of only eating out once a week or walking everyday. Or you can aim to lose 5 lbs, smaller is easier and when you reach those goals you will be excited and ready to set new goals.
    And don't forget to use your MFP friends for support and ideas. That is why we are here. Ask for help. Ask for snack ideas. Ask for work out tips. Find a work out buddy.

    you can do this...good luck
  • drakechic08
    drakechic08 Posts: 156 Member
    The biggest thing is to let go of all the all or nothing mentalitly. Set realist goals for yourself, right out a plan, keep a journal of your feelings, what you eat, what you do to work out. It will keep you more aware of what you are doing. But make sure it is all for you and only you. If you have a bad day, remember that its ok and just do better the next day. One of my favorite quotes is "You might be slow, but you are lapping everyone on the couch". Don't compare yourself with others. You are your own person and you need to remember we all have our own struggles, but we all have different things that work to get around them. When we lost a friend at the movie theater shooting this year, I realized life is short and I want to be out enjoying everything the best that I can, and in order to enjoy some of those things I need to get healthier. Figure out why you want to do this for yourself and use that to drive you everyday. Put up pictures and quotes that inspire you or a pair of jeans you want to get back in and use that to fuel you. Feel free to add me if you would like.
  • smeghani
    smeghani Posts: 11 Member
    Thank you @adagolden and @drakechic for your encouragement and thoughts. I am def going to keep that in mind and hopefully achieve my goals. @drakechic I am so sorry about your loss, I am glad you were able to draw inspiration from this incident and make a change.
  • Itsme_Mary
    Itsme_Mary Posts: 17 Member
    @Tracee Wow, that is a bit snarky, if she could do it that easy she wouldn't of asked for some help! :(
  • Itsme_Mary
    Itsme_Mary Posts: 17 Member
    @drakchick08.. Such great advice!
    @smghani.. You need baby steps.. Don't try to kick this thing in a day or week, set some goals, little ones are great. If you are not used to exercising, Walk! Simply walk, as you loose you will want to do more. I am not a guy person, you will most likely never see me at gum, but I like to swim so I go to the pool, do something you like.
    Most importantly.. Love yourself no mater what you look like. I started telling myself on a daily basis, I am beautiful, it is kind of awkward at first, but you will start to believe it and feel it, and fell good about every accomplishment! Hope that helps.
  • srhershey
    srhershey Posts: 181 Member
    I LOVE food and to relax on the couch. I have an office job too so it's not like I get any excercise at work. I"ve always battled my weight, gaining then losing and gaining then losing and so on. I found some coworkers who felt the same and we have this little motivational group at work. We share recipes and workout tips with each other. I find that in order for me to jump start my "living healthy" lifestyle, I need to do something to see results and fast. I started to do my version of Atkins, staying as close to 20 carbs a day as possible but not going over 40 carbs per day. I did this for 2 weeks while doing Zumba (I love to dance and it's a lot of fun). I started to lose weight, about 1.5lb a week. After about a month, I started to eat whatever I wanted but watched my portions and planned out my daily meals so that I can stay within my daily goals of calories, carbs, protein, sugar and sodium. By paying attention to what I was eating and entering it into MFP, I realized I can have Pizza Hut pizza for a meal, but I must eat healthy the rest of the day. I've done almost every diet you could think of, but I've finally given in to realizing that this is a lifestyle change. Quick fixes and diet pills do not work and if they do you will eventually gain your weight back. By watching what I eat and excercising, I've been slowly losing weight and keeping it off. I don't deprive myself of foods I love, I just make sure I have enough calories to enjoy them. I also allow myself a cheat meal every week. As far as working out, find something you love to do. I love to dance, so I bought Zumba. Since I get bored with DVDs, I tend to rotate my collection every 2 months. After Zumba, I did Jillians 30 Day Shred and noticed inches disappearing. After that DVD, I started Insanity, which when watching the informercial I thought I'd die if I ever tried it. I've done Insanity 2 months now, about 2-4 times a week though. I've actually started the program all over again and will aim for 4 times a week or 5 if I can. My motivation in getting healthier, is my 4 1/2 yr old daughter and my husband. I want to be able to play for a while with my daughter without getting winded or tired. I want to be able to look and feel sexy for my husban. I want to be able to wear the type of clothes I like rather than baggy tshirts and sweats. You need to find something that will motivate the hell out of you and maintain focus.

    *piece of advise, don't go by the scale, take measurements.
  • frosty73
    frosty73 Posts: 424 Member
    You are in the perfect place to START. You just need someone to wave $100 in front of your face and say, "I'll give you this money if you lose the weight!" (Sadly, nobody ever does that!)

    Take some pictures of yourself, today, as miserable as you feel. Promise yourself that you will do a little bit better with your food intake tomorrow, and each following day. Put a big sign up on your fridge that will motivate you. It isn't all-or-nothing, it's more like balancing a set of scales. Some days you eat more, some days you eat less, but hopefully overall you can cut some calories and start losing weight. It is very hard when you have the all-or-nothing mentality (I do, too.) I want to "be there" and if I can't be at my destination, I'm going to make sure I'm at my fattest! If I'm not "dieting", I'm going to be pigging out! Well, that doesn't work for me any more, it's about making healthy life changes. Tell yourself you are starting fresh starting RIGHT NOW (not tomorrow, not on Monday...) and then do it.

    The all-or-nothing approach works GREAT for logging food. Log it. Everything. Everything you eat. Every single bite. No sneaking! Even if your calorie counts are higher than you want, at least you know where you are and why you are there. You can do this!
  • hazymary
    hazymary Posts: 190 Member
    You've had some GREAT advice...weed through it.....take what is useful and put in action! Just a few words to the wise...
    THIN, SKINNY, whatever....... doesn't equal happiness. You have to work on your mind as well as your body.
    Best of luck in your Journey to being a more healthy you.
  • dittmarml
    dittmarml Posts: 351 Member
    Would be helpful if you open your diary - then perhaps we can help with some specific ideas about intake, food choices, etc.
  • BrawlerBella
    BrawlerBella Posts: 400 Member
    Hi Doll. I'm sorry you feel this way. Time to stop mollycoddling yourself! Ask yourself how bad do you want it and where do you want to be? The will power has to come from within. Stop thinking it and live it!! I wish you all the best on your new journey!
  • josachi
    josachi Posts: 79
    Frosty73 is right...if only someone could wave $100 in front of you, that would be pretty motivating, wouldn't it?

    I do something along those lines. Every time I am tempted to indulge in a treat (I love both sweet and salty treats) or buy something I really know I should avoid, I put a dollar into a savings jar instead. The dollar only goes in IF I don't indulge. I've been doing this for about two months now. I just counted it (so I could post this), and there is $74 in there already! By the time I reach my first major goal I should have close to $100, so I will be able to go shopping and buy myself some new SMALLER size clothes! :)

    You CAN do this. I didn't think I'd ever find the motivation myself, so I understand your sadness and depression. The truly amazing thing is that once you embark on this lifestyle change, you will be happier with yourself. Now, when I start feeling sad about my weight, I go for a walk instead of opening the fridge. It doesn't happen overnight, but believe me, it will happen for you. Take small steps and congratulate yourself every time you do something good for yourself (or put a dollar in your savings jar!). Hang in there, and take another small step right now, okay?

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