The Straight Poop

OK, it's NOT a comfortable topic, but we're all adults here, so may I please play Dr. Oz for a moment and announce that dieting constipates the crap outta me (or not..lol)? :grumble:

And please, a GENTLE laxative has never been invented. They're ALL wee dynamite pills that would be more aptly named "Colon Explosion" :explode: or "Roto Rooter Madness". :mad:

I know, I know....more FIBER! But come on....the taste of brown rice and whole wheat bread/pasta SUCKS! :noway: More liquids? Puh-lease. I am a walking ocean waiting for her personal tsunami. Ahem. :blushing:

OK, now that I've gotten that out of my system (or not...lol).....let's talk about: frequency....30-day "cleanses"....shape, size, odor (oh grow up!), colour...I mean, really - dieting CHANGES things! (like your mood/personality, for starters! lol) :embarassed:

And if anyone even mentions "flora" and isn't talking about plants, then I'm sooo gonna smack you silly. :tongue:
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Replies

  • jr1985
    jr1985 Posts: 1,033 Member
    Try eating more beans...They are literally... the ****... Mix them into soups or things if you dont' like to eat them plain... and personally... ground lima beans or chickpeas just taste like whatever I put in them to me... I even grind them up, add cocoa powder, truvia and steal cut oats and make no bake cookies with them.
  • chellec23
    chellec23 Posts: 147 Member
    I like the Kellogg's Fiber Plus Antioxidants bars.. they are only 120-140 calories each and contain 9 grams of fiber each (35% daily value). Have you tried that?
  • ashleybr1980
    ashleybr1980 Posts: 70 Member
    I am in the same boat. When I was just eating anything and only watching portion size I never had a problem but now that I am really watching what I am eating I have been constipated and this is not a good feeling.
  • tehzephyrsong
    tehzephyrsong Posts: 435 Member
    I definitely know that feel. Are you sure you're sufficiently hydrated? I'm having similar problems, and I'm almost positive that my problems stem from two things:

    1. Lack of fiber, because I realized I hadn't so much as looked at a piece of fruit, or beans, or whole-wheat bread or pasta in about two weeks.
    2. Dehydration, because I suddenly started going to the gym for about an hour every day without upping my water intake throughout the day to compensate. And I'm usually somewhat dehydrated anyway because I know I don't drink enough water.

    Drink up and chow down, and see if that doesn't get things moving.
  • lkcuts
    lkcuts Posts: 224
    I started taking trace liquid minerals. In orange juice, not too horrible. A Little coffee and breakfast and with in an hour Its time to go. they are bitter so orange juice helps with the taste (about 1/4 oz.) Some days I shudder afterwards but I know they are good for me and really help. Remember Cod liver oil? Same effect. you have to wean yourself into it by a few drops at a time at first ,then up the dosage until you find what works for you.
  • Gramps251
    Gramps251 Posts: 738 Member
    I can't see your food diary so I don't know what you're eating but I don't have the problem you're discussing.

    I eat lot's of fruit and veggies and drink lots of water.
  • lilsis10
    lilsis10 Posts: 72 Member
    Serious topic, but you are SO funny!!:laugh:

    I lean toward constipation anyway, but I also take a med in which that is a side-effect. So, I'm always looking for something to keep me regular. Drinking all my water and eating right helps if I do it and hurts if I don't. However, it's not enough to keep me regularly regular on its own. I have to take a probiotic (please don't smack me!:flowerforyou: ) every day and one of my meals is a Shakeology shake. (Not selling, just stating.) I like to chew my food, so sometimes the shake is hard to do, but being regular makes me feel so much better, it's worth it.

    A doctor recommended Miralax and taking 1/2 to 1 teaspoon mixed in food or a drink (which is less that the recommended dose) can also help without any painful explosions.

    Wish I had a solution for you, but for now, I'll just have to be fighting the battle of the bowels right along side of you.
  • amandazylstra
    amandazylstra Posts: 12 Member
    I have the same problem, but didn't relate the 2. I know! Duh!! Thanks for the post, I will have to make some changes. I have upped my green veggie intake so much I am pooping like a goose.(YUK!) Thought all the veggies were enough fiber. I have been trying to avoid wheat. (if you read Wheat Belly you will too.) I need to add beans. I'll be Googling recipes this afternoon.
  • flatblade
    flatblade Posts: 224 Member
    My "silver bullet" has been fruits. They seem to help me. Also I have eaten more broccoli since starting with MFP. The combination has worked well enough.
  • witanga
    witanga Posts: 1 Member
    Try the colon pure from GNC just mix in juice and take it down quick. Anything in pill form is all bad the results are those violent dumps.
  • debjae
    debjae Posts: 242
    ground flax seed sprinkle on food, smoothies, drink it mixed in warm water.
  • aligatorwww
    aligatorwww Posts: 48 Member
    Target or Walmart - sugar Free orange flavored powder fiber laxative. (It is NOT like chemical laxatives, It's pure psyllium husks.) Take a level teaspoon with about 6 oz of water before meals. Start with one a day the first day and work up to three. It's easy and tastes pretty good. Drink 8 to 12 oz of water after. Amazing results.
  • glenner
    glenner Posts: 160 Member
    Right on with the previous post- I use Metamucil for cholestrol-lowering value so I have more- three teaspoons before breakfast and supper. Helps me feel full, lowers cholestrol and I am regular as clock-work. Works great ~~~
  • wolfchild59
    wolfchild59 Posts: 2,608 Member
    What are you considering constipated? Two days without? Four days without?

    I ask because I was a daily goer (usually multiple times a day) and once if been eating healthier for awhile things slowed down. I talked to my doctor about it, I get plenty of fiber from good sources, I drink lots of water, I eat live culture yogurt, all that stuff, but I just wasn't going every day anymore. But the doctor told me that anything up to four to five days in between is actually still considered perfectly normal and nothing should be taken to speed up the process unless actual physical pain is involved.

    So as much as I preferred the every day aspect of my pre-healthy eating life, I've just accepted my much more random, sometimes four or five days without, kind of life. Bodies just process different things differently, doesn't mean anything is wrong.

    Which goes back to my initial question, because if you're not going beyond five days in between each time, there probably isn't really anything actionable.
  • misskris78
    misskris78 Posts: 136 Member
    A grapefruit a day keeps the ex lax away.
  • secretlobster
    secretlobster Posts: 3,566 Member
    may I please play Dr. Oz for a moment

    Only if you promise to say something absurd.
  • jasonr1009
    jasonr1009 Posts: 342 Member
    i drink an all fruit smoothie first thing in the morning. nothing but fruit with a scoop of protein in it. I have never been so regular in all my life. Big lumberjack poops.... seriously.
  • Have tried numerous recommended fixes to include all types of fiber but found the best to be either Milk Thistle for liver and gallbladder function or good ole Magnesium Citrate tablets (acts much like Milk of Mag but no "Diarrhea").
  • scottbrown78
    scottbrown78 Posts: 142 Member
    I drink diet green tea and yea I have the opposite problem
  • My daughter takes Miralax daily and it helps her "go" every single day. It draws water back into the colon and keeps you from "backing" up. She has had no side effects, doesn't feel like she has to rush to the bathroom.

    It really helps keep her regular and highly recommend it. Available at Costco
  • citizencrp
    citizencrp Posts: 228 Member
    I don't have this problem, except occasionally and briefly when I eat too much cheese and not enough fiber, but I love beans, brown rice and oatmeal so it is pretty rare.
    My guess is you aren't getting enough fiber so if you really hate whole grains: add fresh fruits and vegetables--add more veggies than fruits.
    You could also try dates, prunes, raisins, etc...
    Also--that Jamie Lee Curtis yogurt might help--though all yogurt and probiotics could also be beneficial.

    I did have constipation after back surgery last year and this is what I learned:
    A little prune juice goes a long way and is pretty tasty. I had always assumed it would be disgusting.
    MiraLax is the laxative doctors prescribed and I recall it being gentle and it mixed easily into any beverage.
    Good luck!
  • Graelwyn75
    Graelwyn75 Posts: 4,404 Member
    As an ex laxative abuser(used to be anorexic), I remain pretty regular just eating about Ib of vegetables a day and a few pieces of fruit, with some milled flax stirred into greek yoghurt/quark.

    I also take a probiotic with added fibre.

    And if I really get bunged up, prunes work for me just fine. Best eaten close to bedtime, around 50g. And a hot drink on getting up.
  • BogQueen1
    BogQueen1 Posts: 320 Member
    Coffee. Lots of vegetables. Water.

    And. Exercise. Nothing better for getting the insides moving then getting moving! At least that's what I've found.
  • DonnaLeeCattes
    DonnaLeeCattes Posts: 492 Member
    I had these issues before I started eating better. Now I'm pretty regular. Maybe your not getting enough water. If you like air popcorn there is fiber in that and not much calories. Sorry you are having this problem :/
  • EnchantedEvening
    EnchantedEvening Posts: 671 Member
    There are lots of yummy foods that contain fiber.

    Off the top of my head: raspberries, pears, apples, strawberries, whole wheat spaghetti, Raisin Bran and other high-fiber cereals, Fiber One bars (love the choc chip granola), oatmeal, red beans, black beans, split peas, lentils, artichokes, peas, broccoli

    I've also had luck with blueberries, grapes, and prunes when I need a "natural" laxative. Raisin Bran works well because it has fiber AND grapes (raisins).
  • loriaqui
    loriaqui Posts: 55 Member
    I won't mention 'plants'. However, I do that a supplement that has something to that effect...smack. Got it...:bigsmile:

    On a side note...I noticed that since I wasn't eating all that junk...my body had no waste to dispose of...so I can go without for a few days...feel absolutely fine.

    Edit: I will add that the days I do go in a row...tend to be the next day(s) after a meal of carbs. Don't know if that is the reason or not...just noticed it tends to happen that way.
  • mss_anthropy
    mss_anthropy Posts: 31 Member
    30 day cleanse? tooooo damn long to be constipated if you ask me...... what works for me.....

    fiber one cereal (the original stuff that looks like rabbit pellets lol)
    Naked Juice - Blue Machine
    castor oil pills (if you're desperate to poop, pills cus i hate the taste)

    honestly the first 2 move me pretty quick especially if you do them together...
  • Ok I know you drink water... already... But this really seems to help many people I know... 5-6 glasses of water before you brush your teeth yes it sounds gross...but I know many people who do it...and almost immediately it's "plop de plop" ;)... can't hurt to try i guess...


    just make sure you brush and floss the previous night ;)
  • dawndw
    dawndw Posts: 203
    Didn't read all the replies. I go to my health food store and get something called "Smooth Move" it is a tea and is kinda licorice flavored. It wasn't or isn't harsh. They have a chocolate flavored one but I heard that is awful.
  • bowseramanda
    bowseramanda Posts: 58 Member
    I like the Kellogg's Fiber Plus Antioxidants bars.. they are only 120-140 calories each and contain 9 grams of fiber each (35% daily value). Have you tried that?
    I have. they are delicious but also known as fart bars.