Newly divorced...

245

Replies

  • kittyhorn
    kittyhorn Posts: 112 Member
    Take your time and become comfortable with the new single you! Just do activities you enjoy, be happy and the rest will follow :) I'm in my early 30s with a 3yr old and I've found the jerks weed themselves out really quickly.
  • Ruger2506
    Ruger2506 Posts: 309 Member
    I would hope that you're not "most guys" ....

    I would say every guy was at one point in time. Sure I am 100% devoted to my wife and kid now. However that took a lot of growing. 5 years ago I was devoted to myself, my career and my wallet. And as discussed before what I would get from others.
  • iAMsmiling
    iAMsmiling Posts: 2,394 Member
    Oh don't get me wrong. I didn't let kids get in the way of me sleeping with their moms. I just wasn't about to stick around and raise a Brady Bunch.

    I am sure you can find some guy who will though.

    Not doing the males of the species proud here man.

    And, kids aren't baggage.
  • OliLloyd
    OliLloyd Posts: 61 Member
    I'm not going to write the cliche 'you're gorgeous line'. Instead, i'll say this, women having children will put off the guys you dont want anyway. If a guy can't accept that a woman in her twenties has children then he isn't worth seeking. I don't know much about 'the game' because I can't say I get much female attention, but I'd assume that having kids will be a catalyst rather than a hindrance to you finding another guy.
  • Ruger2506
    Ruger2506 Posts: 309 Member


    And, kids aren't baggage.

    we can agree to disagree here.
  • iAMsmiling
    iAMsmiling Posts: 2,394 Member
    Okay, as you may gather from the title, I'm divorced, waiting on papers to be finalized....I haven't been single in 10 years, aka since I've been an adult. How's the game work these days for a single 26 year old, nursing student with 2 kids?? lol...all advice, tips, pointers and HOT GUYS welcome haha!! And ladies, I know you all have some kinda advice ;)

    If I weren't 2wice your age and married, you'd have me on sense of humor alone. You were very funny in that awkward thread.
    Pretty dang cute too.

    You'll only be alone as long as you want to...which, may be longer than you think.
  • CalJur
    CalJur Posts: 627 Member
    Just like riding a bike. You never really forget. Just don't accept anything less than the best.
  • slkehl
    slkehl Posts: 3,801 Member
    Thanks! I think so too...his loss, the world's gain is the way I see it ha ha!!

    Great attitude! I know you want to hit the dating scene, nothing wrong with that, but if I were you, I'd enjoy being single for a while. It's a wonderful thing once you learn to embrace it! Sounds like a new experience for you as an adult.
  • the kids will make dating tough. Nobody really wants someone else's baggage. I was lucky to find a kid free 30 year old when I finally decided to settle down. We both agreed it is tough to find non-divorced and non-parents these days.

    Wow. Just wow.

    Plenty of people aren't going to mind your kids because a) they aren't, well, that guy or b) they will also have kids.

  • I'm actually revolted by this post.

    Maybe in a round 'bout way my advice is watch out for most guys. We are dirty!

    I would hope that you're not "most guys" ....

    It's funny that I have never met a single man like this -- and I've known many.
  • OBXbound4me
    OBXbound4me Posts: 245 Member
    When I met my wife (current) we had both been divorced and she already had a son. She was awesome and when I met her son I came to love him too. His "doner" checked out and I adopted him when he was 5. He is now almost 12 and our daughter is 6. If you get a good guy and the right guy the kids will only make things better. You are very attractive and seem to be funny and easy going so you should have no trouble getting back in the game. :) Just take your time, don't rush and make sure whoever you choose is worthy of not just you but your kids too and accepts them also. Good luck!!
  • iAMsmiling
    iAMsmiling Posts: 2,394 Member
    When I met my wife (current) we had both been divorced and she already had a son. She was awesome and when I met her son I came to love him too. His "doner" checked out and I adopted him when he was 5. He is now almost 12 and our daughter is 6. If you get a good guy and the right guy the kids will only make things better. You are very attractive and seem to be funny and easy going so you should have no trouble getting back in the game. :) Just take your time, don't rush and make sure whoever you choose is worthy of not just you but your kids too and accepts them also. Good luck!!

    Good dad and good advice.
  • Jonesie86
    Jonesie86 Posts: 446 Member
    Thanks everyone...but ready for the REAL kicker??? Wait for it...my 3 year old has Downs Syndrome, and a different "sperm donor" than my 19 month old (I say sperm donor cause her "dad" hasn't seen her since she was 3 weeks old). One thing I won't take from the soon to be ex husband is he stepped up and fathered her when my ex wouldn't - that's a man.
  • djsupreme6
    djsupreme6 Posts: 1,210 Member
    that is a man...I will give him credit for that
  • iAMsmiling
    iAMsmiling Posts: 2,394 Member
    That's a lot more to take on and you will have to find a special guy who can handle a special needs kid. Not saying some won't step up, but as a father of a special, I know it is no easy thing to commit your life to and be able to handle.
  • docdrd
    docdrd Posts: 176 Member
    I agree with the advice about NOT rushing into anything new. Take some time to get used to being on your own, and decide what you want in the next one so you don't make the same mistakes (assuming there had to be some mistakes). Also, please don't let your kids meet the guys you are dating until you are SURE you are going to be in a relationship. Kids want attachment and it is hard on them to have people come and go. I know you know this, but figured it could not hurt to reinforce by saying it again. And finally, have fun!!! You get to be on your own for a while. Enjoy it!! This is the start of a great new adventure for you. Cheers!
  • From one 26 year old single mom of two(one of whom is a special needs child) nursing student to another, CONGRATS! Getting divorced was the BEST thing I have ever done. Celebrate, find a new routine and only good things will follow.


    annnd, find a man that DESERVES to be in your children's lives. They are the gifts here, not just speed bumps on the road to dating. Alway always put them first!
  • susjan
    susjan Posts: 105
    the kids will make dating tough. Nobody really wants someone else's baggage. I was lucky to find a kid free 30 year old when I finally decided to settle down. We both agreed it is tough to find non-divorced and non-parents these days.

    Really?! What a tool... I see you're a real role model for you son, huh?

    OP- you sound like you have things going for you so I'm sure you'll be fine :)
  • emilydumarce
    emilydumarce Posts: 46 Member
    wow! im going thru a divorce too! in the final stages-just waiting for the papers. i have two small children and am currently going back to school so i can support them. ive wondered this too!! (:
  • djsupreme6
    djsupreme6 Posts: 1,210 Member
    beautiful, intelligent and a great sense of humor and a great mom...thats a guys dream woman there