I am so terrified of hanging skin.

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I know that I can lose the weight. I know that eating well and working out will get me there - I’ve experienced it and I know it in my mind, but I am absolutely terrified. I am so afraid that because of my weight (190lbs, give or take) and the large amount of stretch marks on my thighs and hips (all from at least nine or ten years ago, during puberty) that my skin will never be elastic enough to let me feel good in my skin.

I’m not afraid of failure, I’m not afraid of success -

I’m afraid of the end result. Even with working out, even with a healthy diet, I can’t undo what has happened to my body. It would be years and years before I could ever afford surgery for hanging skin or for “tucking”.

At least at my current weight, my skin is semi-firm around the fat that has developed.

I am so scared of what I will look like without the fat. I am constantly told that no amount of exercising, flexing, strength training, you name it will make up for the hanging skin I might have. I am constantly told that I will never be firm in my new body. I am told these things by a close friend who is a personal trainer.

It makes me wonder, why even bother?

I know that is such a poor attitude to have and it's only 10% of how I feel most of the time.

Does anyone have any information or experience with this? :frown: :embarassed: I feel like I've been self-sabotaging myself out of this ridiculous fear. For those who have hanging skin, is it worth it? Anyone have any tips to prevent it or what can be done in the case of it happening?
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Replies

  • DorisInTheDena
    DorisInTheDena Posts: 152 Member
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    First of all, you are young. That is in your favor. I am almost 47 and am about 85 pounds lighter than my highest weight. The only problem area I have really noticed at this point is my underarm/tricep area. Remember that your weight loss will really outweigh any hanging/loose skin. My stomach is saggy but I have had two C-sections in the past 25 years. Bottom line-Go for it! Deal with the loose skin that is there later but it probably won't be that bad.
  • purple_tux1
    purple_tux1 Posts: 250 Member
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    Have you looked at the before/after pics in the Success form? This may help you feel a bit better.

    I'm personally more afraid of losing my eyesight to diabetes than a bit of hanging skin, but that's just me.

    If you were standing to lose 200 pounds, you'd have alot more to worry about, but you are lookign at maybe 50 pounds.

    You are never again going to have the tight firm body of a 16 year old, however you will look better with your clothes on than you do now and you will be healthier than you are now. It's upsetting how our bodies change as we age, but all we can do is our best with what we have.
  • kmuree
    kmuree Posts: 283 Member
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    Silly me, I totally missed a post of this same topic below. :embarassed: :laugh: I looked but went right past it! I apologize, my fellow Fitness Pals!

    Count this just as a little rant if you'd like. :smile: Maybe I can take some of the experiences shared off of the other topic.
  • kris4chloe
    kris4chloe Posts: 245 Member
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    i don't know about your particular situation. but after 110 lbs loss i don't have alot of extra skin on my upper body and just a little bit on my thighs and lower belly and i am much older then you.

    i did strength training, cardio, and lots of water from almost the beginning.

    i took it slow and i tried to eat fairly cleanly but still allowed myself treats.

    don't use that as a road block, you will be much healthier and feel better after you lose excess weight. our bodies were not designed to hold the extra weight and although it doesn't affect you now, it will as you get older.
  • TinGirl314
    TinGirl314 Posts: 430 Member
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    Oh hun I'm right there with you.
    I started at 370 pounds...I've been obese all my life and I'm scared to death of it too.
    Unfortunately there are no oils, lotions, injections (interesting story behind that one) ect that can fix the damage that's already been done.

    However...
    Lifting can and WILL aid you in your journey.
    As long as I've been obese...my arms are actually shrinking back down and I know it's gotta be the lifting.
    Will I look perfect when I'm done? No.
    I'm going to do everything I can to help my body though. We're not just getting rid of fat...
    It's the diabetes, the high blood pressure and heart disease.
    It's pancreantitis from high triglycerides and not being able to walk a mile without feeling like you're going to fall over.
    Those are my goals. :)

    I am nervous though...and every loss is a good thing and a bad thing...
    If you'd like to be friends, maybe we can do it together and find out. :)
  • kmuree
    kmuree Posts: 283 Member
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    Have you looked at the before/after pics in the Success form? This may help you feel a bit better.

    I'm personally more afraid of losing my eyesight to diabetes than a bit of hanging skin, but that's just me.

    If you were standing to lose 200 pounds, you'd have alot more to worry about, but you are lookign at maybe 50 pounds.

    You are never again going to have the tight firm body of a 16 year old, however you will look better with your clothes on than you do now and you will be healthier than you are now. It's upsetting how our bodies change as we age, but all we can do is our best with what we have.

    The good news is, I never had the tight firm body of a 16 year old (I was actually heavier than I am now) so I luckily won't have such a rough comparison. :laugh: :wink: Thank you, you're right .. sometimes I forget that my health is above all else in this process. I'd love to reduce my asthma and have more stamina. I will definitely take a look at the Success forum to find some similar results.
    First of all, you are young. That is in your favor. I am almost 47 and am about 85 pounds lighter than my highest weight. The only problem area I have really noticed at this point is my underarm/tricep area. Remember that your weight loss will really outweigh any hanging/loose skin. My stomach is saggy but I have had two C-sections in the past 25 years. Bottom line-Go for it! Deal with the loose skin that is there later but it probably won't be that bad.

    Congratulations! That is wonderful. My arms are one of my biggest concerns.
  • kmuree
    kmuree Posts: 283 Member
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    Oh hun I'm right there with you.
    I started at 370 pounds...I've been obese all my life and I'm scared to death of it too.
    Unfortunately there are no oils, lotions, injections (interesting story behind that one) ect that can fix the damage that's already been done.

    However...
    Lifting can and WILL aid you in your journey.
    As long as I've been obese...my arms are actually shrinking back down and I know it's gotta be the lifting.
    Will I look perfect when I'm done? No.
    I'm going to do everything I can to help my body though. We're not just getting rid of fat...
    It's the diabetes, the high blood pressure and heart disease.
    It's pancreantitis from high triglycerides and not being able to walk a mile without feeling like you're going to fall over.
    Those are my goals. :)

    I am nervous though...and every loss is a good thing and a bad thing...
    If you'd like to be friends, maybe we can do it together and find out. :)

    I'd love to! :bigsmile: I will gladly send you a request right after I hit "reply"! What a wonderful feat you've accomplished. I've heard that lifting can help (and I would love to do it anyways! Big muscles :laugh:). My family has a dramatically strong line of diabetes and my doctor told me a year ago that if I don't lose the weight I've got a 75% chance of developing it myself (as I have the same bad habits my family has had). Thank you!
    i don't know about your particular situation. but after 110 lbs loss i don't have alot of extra skin on my upper body and just a little bit on my thighs and lower belly and i am much older then you.

    i did strength training, cardio, and lots of water from almost the beginning.

    i took it slow and i tried to eat fairly cleanly but still allowed myself treats.

    don't use that as a road block, you will be much healthier and feel better after you lose excess weight. our bodies were not designed to hold the extra weight and although it doesn't affect you now, it will as you get older.

    I really need to drink more water. :embarassed: I really am very pathetic with my intake. I've never been a lotion buff but in the last week I've been insistent about keeping my skin hydrated.
  • vmekash
    vmekash Posts: 422 Member
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    I admit, I don't really know anything about this problem, but I'm sure I read somewhere that it tends to be a bigger problem for folks who 1) have a lot of weight to lose (define a lot, though), AND 2) if they lost that "lot of weight" very quickly. Doesn't give the skin a chance to tighten up. I totally don't know if it is true, but it does make sense to me.

    Being young, the elasticity of your skin should still be pretty strong, so tightening up should, in theory, be better, or at least lessen the amount of loose skin.

    In any event, if you don't lose the weight you wish to lose, you'll never know if loose skin would even be an issue for you. If for no other reason, go for it for your health. Deal w/ loose skin IF the situation arises. Might not, you know.

    I wish you good luck and all the best!

    Oh, I should mention I have a family member who just lost 94 lbs. (which, btw, inspired me to lose weight). She was well-over-weight all of her adult life, and lost the 94 lbs. at the age of 43/44 (and is still losing). She says she has loose skin around her belly, but that it only bothers her when she bends over (like when blow drying her hair). Says it looks weird, and she tells her husband not to look at her when this happens. Otherwise, it is not something she is always aware of. She says that once she reaches her happy weight, she may consider surgery. But, she will wait a while to see what happens w/ the skin after a period of maintenance of her happy weight.

    Hope this helps.
  • alishabby
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    You are not alone on this! This is my biggest nightmare too. I have saggy arms and heavy thighs, and a lot of stretched skin :( i have a long way to go too. in this journey with you. lets see what happens to the skin monster :)
  • FITNLUVINIT
    FITNLUVINIT Posts: 119 Member
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    i don't know about your particular situation. but after 110 lbs loss i don't have alot of extra skin on my upper body and just a little bit on my thighs and lower belly and i am much older then you.

    i did strength training, cardio, and lots of water from almost the beginning.

    i took it slow and i tried to eat fairly cleanly but still allowed myself treats.

    don't use that as a road block, you will be much healthier and feel better after you lose excess weight. our bodies were not designed to hold the extra weight and although it doesn't affect you now, it will as you get older.


    WOWWWWWWWWWWW!!!! thanks for the info. you really encouraged me I am 48 and I had over 114lbs. to lose I have lost 46lbs. and really was concerned if I could get my stomach in shape not like I was at 15 but toned at least. And if I understand correctly you had just as much weight to lose and it can be done. Is this right???
  • KyliAnnHobson
    KyliAnnHobson Posts: 551 Member
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    Hi! That was my worry as well. I had some loose skin, and still do have a little, but it's improved a lot and continues to improve with time!
  • ShannonMpls
    ShannonMpls Posts: 1,936 Member
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    It makes me wonder, why even bother?

    I could give you a long list of reasons but I think you already know them.

    There's a whole lot of awesome that comes from regaining fitness and reaching a healthy weight, and frankly, only a fraction of that awesome is physical in nature.

    For what it's worth, you can see from my ticker below how much I've lost in the last 15 months. My body is not perfect, but I love it.

    Don't use loose skin as an excuse. Do what you can to minimize it, but also know that it's possible to love your body for what it is and what it can do - faults and all.
  • kris4chloe
    kris4chloe Posts: 245 Member
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    WOWWWWWWWWWWW!!!! thanks for the info. you really encouraged me I am 48 and I had over 114lbs. to lose I have lost 46lbs. and really was concerned if I could get my stomach in shape not like I was at 15 but toned at least. And if I understand correctly you had just as much weight to lose and it can be done. Is this right???

    yep, about 15-20 more to go so a total of 125-130 lbs lost when i get to goal weight. i have some pics in my profile, and have been meaning to take more, cuz the last 145 lbs have changed things alot.
  • shelbyweeeee
    shelbyweeeee Posts: 154 Member
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    For me, it's hard to accept the extra skin that I have on my stomach. I just posted pics on my profile yesterday (for the first time! GASP!)

    I have very stretchy skin all over my body from my loss. My arms, thighs and butt all sag. My stomach is the worst and I have some sagging as well on my lower back. When I had done weight lifting earlier this year, my arms did get better, but my abdomen actually got worse. I had more "wrinkles" as I lost inches.

    As much as I struggle to accept this part of me, as much as I really do hate it... I would take this sagging, flopping hanging skin any day over being 100lbs heavier!!

    We are all different, and some people have been able to not have so much excess. I'm not as fortunate. My doc even said that the excess skin I have will not go away no matter how much exercise I do, it would need to be removed.

    The one thing I try to do to keep a positive aspect on it is this.... the more wrinkled my skin gets, the smaller I'm getting!! When I don't have as many, that means I've put on weight or it's TOM and I'm bloated :grumble: lol
  • Leeny01
    Leeny01 Posts: 48 Member
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    I completely relate to this sentiment. It definitely scares me and I have often self-sabotaged. But like other people have said, it really is about our health. I know that if I continue on this self-destructive path, I will become more and more sick. It's not worth it.

    However, at the heart of this issue, is really the fear of rejection. Many of us put on weight because we weren't feeling validated or didn't feel like we had value. WE DO HAVE VALUE - all of us do! Only someone in an intimate relationship with you and you are going to see that loose skin, should it be there...and if anyone would reject you because of something like that, they honestly and truly are not worth your time or affection. You have much more to offer than a perfectly toned body. Outer beauty won't last forever no matter what your current shape but what's inside is your real value. xo
  • onedayillbeamilf
    onedayillbeamilf Posts: 966 Member
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    This is the main fear I've always had that's held me back for so long. But now that I have a health hiccup that can be completely reversed if I watch my diet and exercise, I'm not scared anymore. I might be dangly, but I won't need meds anymore. So I'm ok with The possibility of having batwings and pancake batter tummy.
  • nicholettebell
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    Everyone is different. I've seen some post from some who have lost more than me who...yes... they have hanging skin... but not as severe as mine. Yes...it's worth it.
  • Jessamin
    Jessamin Posts: 338 Member
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    Yeah, I've lost 180 so far and have a reasonable amount of saggy skin. I would say it is absolutely worth it. I feel better and I am achieving goals I never thought I would. Sometimes I feel like if I knew I was going to feel just as ugly at 180 as I did at 365 I would have just stayed fat. But really I know that losing this weight has made me a much, much happier and healthier person.

    That said, I'm gettin' it sliced off in Bangkok as soon as I am able.
  • DCHound
    DCHound Posts: 12
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    I spend a lot of time researching this (I even wrote a book about it) and the things that seem to help the most are staying hydrated of course, heavy weight lifting, dry skin brushing, rebounding then there's a number of vitamins and extracts you can take and use on your skin too. If you're curious you can check out my book's website, www.firmlooseskin.com. Everyone's different, but it's not impossible to lose the weight and tighten your skin back up. Many people's skin tightens naturally anyway, you just have to give it time and also get down to a low BMI. Good luck, I'm right there with you working on it myself.
  • Bonny619
    Bonny619 Posts: 311 Member
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    I would rather look thin in clothes with loose skin than just looking fat all the time.

    Loose skin, who cares. It will be fine!