Emails about being over weight?

I just posted this on another thread but here goes:

I’m an average size person and let me state for the record that I don’t think her weight really affects her ability to be a stellar news anchor. She’s good at what she does and I give her props for attempting to turn a negative remark she got into a good lesson for kids.

That said… I saw that video and what bothered me is that she called the email “bullying”. I think that woman needs to read the definition of actual bullying. Also, she says in the video that his words don’t bother her, but obviously they do since she is making an issue out of it, although it’s questionable whether part of that was just for “show” so she could try and turn it into a lesson for kids on the air.

Either way, she is attempting to latch on to the topic du jour, bullying, and while I appreciate her wanting to tell kids that their looks don’t matter, I’m sick of the term “bullying” getting tossed around every time someone gets their feelings hurt because someone says something they don’t like.

Here is the definition of bullying from a very reliable source:

http://www.stopbullying.gov/what-is-bullying/definition/index.html

Calling something like the email she got “bullying” undermines that seriousness of real bullying that hurts our kids and makes them afraid to even go to school.

The email she got was not that bad. I’m not clear as to why the guy even sent it to her (was it in response to something? Is he just a jerk? I don’t know) but the writer didn’t even use the words “fat” or “obese” in it, let alone call her names or taunt her.

The only part of it where he was out of line was saying that young girls shouldn’t look up to her because of her weight. On the one hand, she’s a strong woman who is clearly successful in her chosen career. Girls should absolutely look up to that. But on the other hand, she IS overweight and just because she claims to be okay with it, doesn’t make it healthy. So, my take: young girls should aspire to be successful in whatever field they choose to be, regardless of their appearances however, they should also aspire to be a healthy weight.

The writers email was unnecessary, maybe the anchor is trying to lose weight and get healthy? But it really does not meet the criteria to be called bullying.

Also, she is in the public eye. This was her own choice when she chose to be a news anchor. Like it or not, when you choose a profession like that, your looks will be judged. Right or wrong, it happens. I model. I’ve had photographers and other models tell me I’m too fat, too skinny, have a weird face, have bad hair, you name it. I expect it. It’s part of what I do. When you choose to do something like act, model, perform, be on tv in any sense you really need to grow some thick skin and ignore the haters.

You should NOT read their emails on tv and give them attention and try to make an issue out of it. It’s equivalent to feeding the internet trolls online. If it had been me, I would have read approx two lines of his email, deleted it, and moved on with my day.

So no, it's not really necessary to point out that she is overweight (unless it was in response to being directly asked or something else that would make such a statement relevant) but she is, she needs to accept that being in the public eye, she is going to be criticized.

Either way, she is attempting to latch on to the topic du jour, bullying, and while I appreciate her wanting to tell kids that their looks don’t matter, I’m sick of the term “bullying” getting tossed around every time someone gets their feelings hurt because someone says something they don’t like.

Calling something like the email she got “bullying” undermines that seriousness of real bullying that hurts our kids and makes them afraid to even go to school.

The email she got was not that bad. I’m not clear as to why the guy even sent it to her (was it in response to something? Is he just a jerk? I don’t know) but the writer didn’t even use the words “fat” or “obese” in it, let alone call her names or taunt her.

The only part of it where he was out of line was saying that young girls shouldn’t look up to her because of her weight. On the one hand, she’s a strong woman who is clearly successful in her chosen career. Girls should absolutely look up to that. But on the other hand, she IS overweight and just because she claims to be okay with it, doesn’t make it healthy. So, my take: young girls should aspire to be successful in whatever field they choose to be, regardless of their appearances however, they should also aspire to be a healthy weight.

The writers email was unnecessary, maybe the anchor is trying to lose weight and get healthy? But it really does not meet the criteria to be called bullying.

Also, she is in the public eye. This was her own choice when she chose to be a news anchor. Like it or not, when you choose a profession like that, your looks will be judged. Right or wrong, it happens. I model. I’ve had photographers and other models tell me I’m too fat, too skinny, have a weird face, have bad hair, you name it. I expect it. It’s part of what I do. When you choose to do something like act, model, perform, be on tv in any sense you really need to grow some thick skin and ignore the haters.

You should NOT read their emails on tv and give them attention and try to make an issue out of it. It’s equivalent to feeding the internet trolls online. If it had been me, I would have read approx two lines of his email, deleted it, and moved on with my day.

So no, it's not really necessary to point out that she is overweight (unless it was in response to being directly asked or something else that would make such a statement relevant) but she is, she needs to accept that being in the public eye, she is going to be criticized.

Amen - I agree with 100% of this.

I am kind of confused with the messages about weight and self esteem going on. People complained when there are Victoria's Secret commercials promoting self love BUT the models are all sizes 0-2/ then folks became a bit happier when Dove came out with "real" women with curves and what not. NOW this with the news anchor.

So, you expect everyone in the world to have the same opinion, and there would never be any conflicting messages from the public at large? What kind of sense does that make? Do you think there's just this big mass out there consisting of everyone else in the world, and we all have one brain?

I saw the video yesterday and I was not impressed. This video is huge on Facebook right now and I feel like it's sending the wrong message.

First of all she was calling out a "bully" but acting like a bully herself. She was encouraging the rude comments that were left on the page for her. Sure they were kind and supportive, but some were also very harsh towards the original email sender.

Second of all, she was sending the message that she is fat and she doesn't care. She never said she is trying to get healthy, or lose weight. She could have went about it a better way like "yes, I'm fat, I struggle with this, and I am working on it" sort of attitude. Rather than "how dare you call me fat, you don't know me, blah blah".

I just posted this on another thread but here goes:

I’m an average size person and let me state for the record that I don’t think her weight really affects her ability to be a stellar news anchor. She’s good at what she does and I give her props for attempting to turn a negative remark she got into a good lesson for kids.

That said… I saw that video and what bothered me is that she called the email “bullying”. I think that woman needs to read the definition of actual bullying. Also, she says in the video that his words don’t bother her, but obviously they do since she is making an issue out of it, although it’s questionable whether part of that was just for “show” so she could try and turn it into a lesson for kids on the air.

Either way, she is attempting to latch on to the topic du jour, bullying, and while I appreciate her wanting to tell kids that their looks don’t matter, I’m sick of the term “bullying” getting tossed around every time someone gets their feelings hurt because someone says something they don’t like.

Here is the definition of bullying from a very reliable source:

http://www.stopbullying.gov/what-is-bullying/definition/index.html

Calling something like the email she got “bullying” undermines that seriousness of real bullying that hurts our kids and makes them afraid to even go to school.

The email she got was not that bad. I’m not clear as to why the guy even sent it to her (was it in response to something? Is he just a jerk? I don’t know) but the writer didn’t even use the words “fat” or “obese” in it, let alone call her names or taunt her.

The only part of it where he was out of line was saying that young girls shouldn’t look up to her because of her weight. On the one hand, she’s a strong woman who is clearly successful in her chosen career. Girls should absolutely look up to that. But on the other hand, she IS overweight and just because she claims to be okay with it, doesn’t make it healthy. So, my take: young girls should aspire to be successful in whatever field they choose to be, regardless of their appearances however, they should also aspire to be a healthy weight.

The writers email was unnecessary, maybe the anchor is trying to lose weight and get healthy? But it really does not meet the criteria to be called bullying.

Also, she is in the public eye. This was her own choice when she chose to be a news anchor. Like it or not, when you choose a profession like that, your looks will be judged. Right or wrong, it happens. I model. I’ve had photographers and other models tell me I’m too fat, too skinny, have a weird face, have bad hair, you name it. I expect it. It’s part of what I do. When you choose to do something like act, model, perform, be on tv in any sense you really need to grow some thick skin and ignore the haters.

You should NOT read their emails on tv and give them attention and try to make an issue out of it. It’s equivalent to feeding the internet trolls online. If it had been me, I would have read approx two lines of his email, deleted it, and moved on with my day.

So no, it's not really necessary to point out that she is overweight (unless it was in response to being directly asked or something else that would make such a statement relevant) but she is, she needs to accept that being in the public eye, she is going to be criticized.

Good point... ( oh and thanks for knowing how to actually state your opinion without feeling the need to be douche in the process. Lol :flowerforyou: )

I try not to be. Being a d-bag to people really doesn't contribute anything to discussion.

I saw the video yesterday and I was not impressed. This video is huge on Facebook right now and I feel like it's sending the wrong message.

First of all she was calling out a "bully" but acting like a bully herself. She was encouraging the rude comments that were left on the page for her. Sure they were kind and supportive, but some were also very harsh towards the original email sender.

Second of all, she was sending the message that she is fat and she doesn't care. She never said she is trying to get healthy, or lose weight. She could have went about it a better way like "yes, I'm fat, I struggle with this, and I am working on it" sort of attitude. Rather than "how dare you call me fat, you don't know me, blah blah".

Also an excellent point! So glad I'm not the only one who feels this way!

Just want to play devils advocate for all of those people here who get so hateful about the "skinny bashers" or those who say anything about a woman being too thin. Yet here you are to bash an overweight person.... :noway:


That being said. I think her calling the person a bully was wrong. They were an a-hole for saying it and not keeping their judgement to themselves but that's about all.


Most of times, being fat is a choice once you see the problem. It's not my fault that I never knew my parents were feeding me bad food and too big of servings as a kid. Lots of people just don't know any better when it comes to food. BUT once you know what the problem is, it's your decision to make a change. I had no idea how the bad food I was eating was until I found MFP and started tracking calories. I did however know better that to keep eating and sitting on the couch all the time. Also, too many people use medical conditions as an excuse to be over weight, when they have the medical condition BECAUSE they are overweight.

If you are an adult and realize you have a weight problem, there is no excuse that you can't change that problem..

Here is my take on it: I am not sure if I think the email was bullying or not but I do think a person's weight does not define how healthy they are. I work out almost everyday and eat healthy most of the time but yet I weigh more than some of my friends who do not exercise, smoke and eat unhealthy. So, does being heavier than what a chart says I should be mean I am more unhealthy....I do not think so but I am sure there are some that do. A persons self worth is not defined by the number on the scale or the size of their pants. That is what bugs me about the email that man wrote. He does not know what she eats or how much she exercises and until someone knows you than what gives them the right to criticize. I am not saying my view is right but this is just how I feel and we all hold our own opinions.

I just posted this on another thread but here goes:

I’m an average size person and let me state for the record that I don’t think her weight really affects her ability to be a stellar news anchor. She’s good at what she does and I give her props for attempting to turn a negative remark she got into a good lesson for kids.

That said… I saw that video and what bothered me is that she called the email “bullying”. I think that woman needs to read the definition of actual bullying. Also, she says in the video that his words don’t bother her, but obviously they do since she is making an issue out of it, although it’s questionable whether part of that was just for “show” so she could try and turn it into a lesson for kids on the air.

Either way, she is attempting to latch on to the topic du jour, bullying, and while I appreciate her wanting to tell kids that their looks don’t matter, I’m sick of the term “bullying” getting tossed around every time someone gets their feelings hurt because someone says something they don’t like.

Here is the definition of bullying from a very reliable source:

http://www.stopbullying.gov/what-is-bullying/definition/index.html

Calling something like the email she got “bullying” undermines that seriousness of real bullying that hurts our kids and makes them afraid to even go to school.

The email she got was not that bad. I’m not clear as to why the guy even sent it to her (was it in response to something? Is he just a jerk? I don’t know) but the writer didn’t even use the words “fat” or “obese” in it, let alone call her names or taunt her.

The only part of it where he was out of line was saying that young girls shouldn’t look up to her because of her weight. On the one hand, she’s a strong woman who is clearly successful in her chosen career. Girls should absolutely look up to that. But on the other hand, she IS overweight and just because she claims to be okay with it, doesn’t make it healthy. So, my take: young girls should aspire to be successful in whatever field they choose to be, regardless of their appearances however, they should also aspire to be a healthy weight.

The writers email was unnecessary, maybe the anchor is trying to lose weight and get healthy? But it really does not meet the criteria to be called bullying.

Also, she is in the public eye. This was her own choice when she chose to be a news anchor. Like it or not, when you choose a profession like that, your looks will be judged. Right or wrong, it happens. I model. I’ve had photographers and other models tell me I’m too fat, too skinny, have a weird face, have bad hair, you name it. I expect it. It’s part of what I do. When you choose to do something like act, model, perform, be on tv in any sense you really need to grow some thick skin and ignore the haters.

You should NOT read their emails on tv and give them attention and try to make an issue out of it. It’s equivalent to feeding the internet trolls online. If it had been me, I would have read approx two lines of his email, deleted it, and moved on with my day.

So no, it's not really necessary to point out that she is overweight (unless it was in response to being directly asked or something else that would make such a statement relevant) but she is, she needs to accept that being in the public eye, she is going to be criticized.

And here I thought I was the only one that thought the word "bully" was being misused when defining the email sender. Your post was very well stated.

It was unprofessional for the news anchor to bring her personal problems on the air, no matter what lesson she believed could be taken from it. No one had to know about that email but her and instead she decided to put her personal feelings before her professional image. I think that no one could possibly take her seriously when she says that the email didn't bother her because if that were true then she would have completely ignored it. By not acknowledging the email at all she could have shown that 1 viewer how little his opinion truly meant to her but instead she did the opposite and showcased herself as a hypocrite - overweight or not.

Personally I don't think it's anyone's job to police "role models" on TV. It is the job of parents to be the best possible role models for their children in whatever circumstances surrounding their lives. If you want to write a nasty email to someone about being a bad role model, write one to Kim Kardashian or Lindsay Lohan - not TV news anchors, they're just doing their jobs like everyone else.

I'm not totally sure of the specifics of this case. It wasn't something that I totally cared about so I just read the headline and went on my day. If you are a large person, it hurts your feelings being told that. I think no matter who you are, secretly you want to lose weight. You either just have the wrong frame or you can't control your eating, or just lack motivation. On the other side: I (am 5'4" and) weighed 110 lbs from gr 7 into my first year of collage. I ate crap food all the time and i ate lots. I just couldn't gain weight! And a fellow student told me that I looked too skinny and I shouldn't wear a certain type of pant because it looks gross. That hurt me too. As I got older I realized that she was doing it because she was heavy and didn't like me. I'm ok with models being "plus size". Hell, I'm ok with models being bigger than a size 2. GASP! Shall I say they are a size 4!? But, really, "celebrities" are just people like everyone else. They are doing what they are good at or enjoy, and it shouldn't matter what size they are. Be comfortable in how you look. That's all that matters. Love yourself. Haters gonna hate.

Bullying is bullying and that buy is a bully by definition someone who.intimidates or mistreats a weaker person. If that wasn't intimidation and mistreatment and if that was not his intention I don't know what is. He was not a friend, a family member, a counsellor and he didn't even know her.

But I really think there's a difference between a person just being an *kitten*, and someone actively bullying.

For instance, a couple of years ago I was on a job site where a guy said to me 'shut up *****' because I jokingly told him to speak English (he was from Honduras). I flipped him off and shrugged and went on with my day. Later during lunch I told one of the other electricians about it, who then told my foreman. I was unaware of this game of telephone until the super of the entire site came up to me and assured me they'd look into 'this matter of sexual harassment'.

I was like 'huh?' And I told him that in my opinion was there was nothing sexual about it - just a guy being an *kitten*.

*shrug* The world's full of them.

Maybe it will prompt her to lose some weight