Mike's Daily Rant 10/16/2012 Topic: Stairs are fun

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Hello My Fitness Pal. I have decided to journal things that frustrate me when it comes to anything related to health, fitness, nutrition and exercise. I started this 2 days ago and will continue to make it a daily occurence. I didnt think that todays rant would come so soon in the day, However it did come. Here it is. I have a coworker that has known me for about 3 years. She has known me as 381 pound Mike and she has known me as 180 pound Mike. Long story short, she is overweight and cries to me about not being able to lose weight and that she is proud of me but cant find motivation to do the same. We talk on the way to the building and she just runs out of energy to talk so I do most of the talking when this happens. So today I mentioned something rather touchy. I finally said to her stop crying about losing weight because I hate negativity. It makes me upset. She stopped crying abruptly. It was so funny! I just said it begins now. If you talk about not being able to lose the weight. I will walk away. Ill let you know that she has done this while eating chinese food, KFC, Burger King and more. I mentioned to her that the foods she eats are a part of the problem. She brushes it off and continues eating. Everyday we get to the building and she goes towards the elevator and I go towards the stairs. I tell her no elevator. She says, "What?" I said elevator is a part of the problem. These stairs are a part of the solution. She looks at me crazy and follows me to the stairs. I would beat her to the 3rd floor everyday and she would be on th elevator. She made it up the stairs but it took her about 5 minutes. This task after losing the weight takes me all of 15 seconds. she tells me that she cant do it because her knee hurts. I tell her that her knees hurt because of all the weight pressing down on them. I stress to her that I know all the feelings because I weighed 100 pounds more than her. She is still upset with me and I say effort=results. I will help if she wants it but will not listen to the constant excuses. Now she is sitting here not talking to me because I was "mean" to her. At this point I want to see how serious she is. Will she come back? Will she continue to complain? Will she stop making excuses? Either way I will be fine but I like for people to prove what they say they are about. If you cant, please dont waste my time. I could go on and on about how wrong her approach is but I wont. Im just a bit bothered why she hates the stairs. In all fairness I think the stairs are fun.

Replies

  • IrishMinx32
    IrishMinx32 Posts: 77 Member
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    When she's ready she will. She should shut her mouth about it though. I learned that for myself. I'm a roller coaster. I get really serious for a few days and then I blow it. I have learned to make positve changes from meal to meal instead of day to day. I goof up at breakfast, I make sure I do right at lunch.

    She saw you achieve your goal and she is jealous, but not ready to commit herself. Unfortunately most of us need to experience an illness before we buckle down and commit. :(
  • meggawatt
    meggawatt Posts: 145 Member
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    I think its pretty amazing that right then and there you challenged her to take a step towards better choices, good for you! Hopefully she comes around to see that you want the best for her, not that you were being mean.

    I agree, stairs are fun! I take the 3 flights up to my office every single day, 7 1/2 years and counting. I could not imagine using the elevator instead.
  • MikeDaMotivator
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    I think its pretty amazing that right then and there you challenged her to take a step towards better choices, good for you! Hopefully she comes around to see that you want the best for her, not that you were being mean.

    I agree, stairs are fun! I take the 3 flights up to my office every single day, 7 1/2 years and counting. I could not imagine using the elevator instead.

    Way to go!!! I hope she does realize that.
  • MikeDaMotivator
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    When she's ready she will. She should shut her mouth about it though. I learned that for myself. I'm a roller coaster. I get really serious for a few days and then I blow it. I have learned to make positve changes from meal to meal instead of day to day. I goof up at breakfast, I make sure I do right at lunch.

    She saw you achieve your goal and she is jealous, but not ready to commit herself. Unfortunately most of us need to experience an illness before we buckle down and commit. :(

    Very well said.
  • Perfectdiamonds1
    Perfectdiamonds1 Posts: 347 Member
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    I understand where you are coming from Mike. Its the same in my office. The weight just dont come off one day. There was hard work behind it and there is still hard work going on. One day, there will be a light that goes off and she'll get it. We can only advise when ask, but when people are not ready they are not ready. Sometimes people think there is a secret behind what we did.
  • LoraF83
    LoraF83 Posts: 15,694 Member
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    It may take her awhile, but when it finally clicks for her, this will probably be a piece of the puzzle. Sounds like she's not ready yet....but that doesn't mean you have to coddle her. Keep being a voice of reason and support and hopefully one day she'll be able to make the change needed.
  • knowwhentoshutup
    knowwhentoshutup Posts: 318 Member
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    Agreed. Until YOU take responsibility for YOUR actions it will never happen.

    Keep being a positive force for her - and DON'T accept the excuses.
  • Erienneb
    Erienneb Posts: 592 Member
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    The stairs were the very first thing I changed five weeks ago. I can't take the stairs to my office (15 floors up and they lock the stair wells except in emergency) but the parking garage where I work has stairs. I will purposefully park at the top and take the stairs down and up twice, sometimes three times (I have to leave the office once to get the mail and sometimes on my break) a day. This was when I realized I was serious about changing my life. I'm now down 20lbs because change isn't about overhauling one big thing, it's about all the little things along the way that add up. You pushed your coworker into something good, but it will only stick if she is ready for it.
  • samlankford
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    noticed that a lot of the whiners are waiting for that MAGIC pill that will make them drop the pounds.. trust me, my mom and my sister are two of them waiting for that very pill... seems that a lot of people don't realize how REWARDING it is when you put in that hard work and you see the results.. yeah you may not see them right away but stick with it...
  • RunsOnEspresso
    RunsOnEspresso Posts: 3,218 Member
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    I used to have a friend that would whine about her weight. She would see me lose weight or maintain and say I had such great willpower and ask how I did it. I'd tell her. She'd learn about a new "fad" diet or think being vegan is the answer (it is for some, not for all). She'd go all out and then crash and burn. She'd ask me why she keeps failing. I'd explain it. She never actually listened to what I told her when she asked. Unfortunately I had to end this friendship as she would cry and beg for advice (about everything) but never listen to me even though I had been through X or Y before.

    Hopefully your co-worker heeds your advice and you are able to maintain a relationship with her.
  • Denise1224
    Denise1224 Posts: 150 Member
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    It may take her awhile, but when it finally clicks for her, this will probably be a piece of the puzzle. Sounds like she's not ready yet....but that doesn't mean you have to coddle her. Keep being a voice of reason and support and hopefully one day she'll be able to make the change needed.

    Well said! That's true of almost any "bad" habit. When I was a smoker (quit over 3 years ago) I had to be ready to quit there was no way I could quit before I was ready. It takes time but having a voice of reason not more excuses is what it takes sometimes :-)
  • MikeDaMotivator
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    I understand where you are coming from Mike. Its the same in my office. The weight just dont come off one day. There was hard work behind it and there is still hard work going on. One day, there will be a light that goes off and she'll get it. We can only advise when ask, but when people are not ready they are not ready. Sometimes people think there is a secret behind what we did.

    No secrets its all diet and exercise.
  • MikeDaMotivator
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    Agreed. Until YOU take responsibility for YOUR actions it will never happen.

    Keep being a positive force for her - and DON'T accept the excuses.

    I dont accept any excuse from anyone.
  • MikeDaMotivator
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    The stairs were the very first thing I changed five weeks ago. I can't take the stairs to my office (15 floors up and they lock the stair wells except in emergency) but the parking garage where I work has stairs. I will purposefully park at the top and take the stairs down and up twice, sometimes three times (I have to leave the office once to get the mail and sometimes on my break) a day. This was when I realized I was serious about changing my life. I'm now down 20lbs because change isn't about overhauling one big thing, it's about all the little things along the way that add up. You pushed your coworker into something good, but it will only stick if she is ready for it.

    Very well said and congrats on 20lbs gone. Keep it up. She may not be ready but only time will tell.
  • MikeDaMotivator
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    noticed that a lot of the whiners are waiting for that MAGIC pill that will make them drop the pounds.. trust me, my mom and my sister are two of them waiting for that very pill... seems that a lot of people don't realize how REWARDING it is when you put in that hard work and you see the results.. yeah you may not see them right away but stick with it...

    Truth
  • MikeDaMotivator
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    I used to have a friend that would whine about her weight. She would see me lose weight or maintain and say I had such great willpower and ask how I did it. I'd tell her. She'd learn about a new "fad" diet or think being vegan is the answer (it is for some, not for all). She'd go all out and then crash and burn. She'd ask me why she keeps failing. I'd explain it. She never actually listened to what I told her when she asked. Unfortunately I had to end this friendship as she would cry and beg for advice (about everything) but never listen to me even though I had been through X or Y before.

    Hopefully your co-worker heeds your advice and you are able to maintain a relationship with her.

    Good point.
  • MikeDaMotivator
    Options
    It may take her awhile, but when it finally clicks for her, this will probably be a piece of the puzzle. Sounds like she's not ready yet....but that doesn't mean you have to coddle her. Keep being a voice of reason and support and hopefully one day she'll be able to make the change needed.

    Well said! That's true of almost any "bad" habit. When I was a smoker (quit over 3 years ago) I had to be ready to quit there was no way I could quit before I was ready. It takes time but having a voice of reason not more excuses is what it takes sometimes :-)

    Congrats! Thats huge!
  • RichardAceves
    RichardAceves Posts: 29 Member
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    Congratulations Mike on your weight loss. You truly are an inspiration to me, and a true friend to your co-worker. I was this whiner, all full of why me, I can't do it, i was depressed, felt really bad about how I looked but "I" had an excuse! I was injured on the job< I now have three ruptured disks and didnt work for five years. I gained over "ONE HUNDRED" pounds but I had an excuse a reason for my weight gain. I kept beating myself up that the accident wasn't fair it wasn't my fault, "WHY ME!" I used to be in great shape weighed between 185 to 195 then I hit "315Lbs" but I had an excuse I had a reason. Then I had a grandson who turned my head around and i want to be in his life for as long as the good Lord will allow me. I didnt want to be the grandpa that takes his grandkids to the park and has to sit and watch the kids play but one that will run around and play with them so my light turned on. I had to change my way of thinking, I had an accident, yes, it wasn't fair, no, it wasn't my fault, no, it did totally change my life as well as my families life but I can't change what happened to me I can only change myself, for myself and my family. It's been 15 years since my accident and I finally have my head screawed on right again. I guess what I am trying to say is that it takes time sometimes a long time we just cant give up that daily struggle. Your co-workers light will turn on in her time, I hope you will be around her when it does because even if she doesn't realize it now she needs you. Please don't give-up on her. Sorry for rambling on, this is the first time that I have ever written anything about my accident and it just spilled out. On another note I am 65Lbs down!!!! and I will get down to 200 lbs again one day, slowly but surly you can bet on that!
  • MikeDaMotivator
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    Congratulations Mike on your weight loss. You truly are an inspiration to me, and a true friend to your co-worker. I was this whiner, all full of why me, I can't do it, i was depressed, felt really bad about how I looked but "I" had an excuse! I was injured on the job< I now have three ruptured disks and didnt work for five years. I gained over "ONE HUNDRED" pounds but I had an excuse a reason for my weight gain. I kept beating myself up that the accident wasn't fair it wasn't my fault, "WHY ME!" I used to be in great shape weighed between 185 to 195 then I hit "315Lbs" but I had an excuse I had a reason. Then I had a grandson who turned my head around and i want to be in his life for as long as the good Lord will allow me. I didnt want to be the grandpa that takes his grandkids to the park and has to sit and watch the kids play but one that will run around and play with them so my light turned on. I had to change my way of thinking, I had an accident, yes, it wasn't fair, no, it wasn't my fault, no, it did totally change my life as well as my families life but I can't change what happened to me I can only change myself, for myself and my family. It's been 15 years since my accident and I finally have my head screawed on right again. I guess what I am trying to say is that it takes time sometimes a long time we just cant give up that daily struggle. Your co-workers light will turn on in her time, I hope you will be around her when it does because even if she doesn't realize it now she needs you. Please don't give-up on her. Sorry for rambling on, this is the first time that I have ever written anything about my accident and it just spilled out. On another note I am 65Lbs down!!!! and I will get down to 200 lbs again one day, slowly but surly you can bet on that!

    Man Im so glad you commented. Very inspirational testimony. I am so happy for you and even happier that the grandchildren will get to play with a healthier "pawpaw" I will not give up on her but I wont push her either. I will help when she is ready. Congrats again and thanks for sharing.