Weight loss + friends = ?

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angiechimpanzee
angiechimpanzee Posts: 536 Member
in Motivation and Support
Since I started getting serious about my journey like a month ago, I've been spending very little time with the group of friends I used to hang with, and have instead been hanging out with another friend who has similar diet & exercise goals as me & is serious about them.

When I used to hang out with my old group of friends, they'd say stuff like "I want to lose weight! I want a flat stomach!" But then they'd go to the cafeteria (I'm in college) and eat 3 plates of pizza, desserts, etc. Then when they'd hang out to study, there would be stuff like cheetos and honey buns just all over the place. I soon realized that if I actually wanted to get serious about losing weight, I'd either have to convince them to change their habits (which would be incredibly difficult since I hardly even had control of my own habits back then), or just stop being around them so much.

I chose the latter. And now they've been asking me why I don't hang out with them anymore. I don't want to say "you guys eat like crap & I can't lose weight being around you." but that's honestly the truth. I don't want to be in a situation where I'm sitting in a corner munching on almond slices & they're binging on boxes of cheezits. I mean I allow myself the occasional treat, but they don't know the meaning of moderation. I feel like they were just holding me back. The first month I stopped hanging out with them, I lost 8 pounds. Prior to that I was steadily gaining about a pound a week.

Am I wrong for distancing myself from them? How do I explain to them my reasoning? And are any of you in similar situations?

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  • monty619
    monty619 Posts: 1,308 Member
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    lol i literally watched a video that talked about this.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i34keQ6ZGe0&feature=g-high-u
  • angiechimpanzee
    angiechimpanzee Posts: 536 Member
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    bump
  • Leothelion88
    Leothelion88 Posts: 7 Member
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    I had the similar problem as you Angie! When I did my first round of P90X, I completely changed my nutrition and was careful with what I put in my body. There were times when I ate out with some friends but I made sure I looked at the menu and chose the healthier option (also getting the kitchen to substitute for better alternatives). It was no surprise that they were negative about it and saying stuff how it's unhealthy not to eat the way I used to (seriously?). So eventually, I stopped hanging out with them as much because we'd always end up eating out at the end of the day (or I would leave earlier...so I could eat at home).

    I think the best thing to do is just lead by example and continue to do what you're doing right now. When your friends see you with the foods that you're eating during lunch or while studying, that'll get them thinking on the foods they're eating. If they still mention how they want to lose weight or get a flat stomach, just offer a friendly tip or advice on cutting back some junk food.

    The more they see get results by making changes, eating better, and feeling healthier, they'll realize your commitment and be more supportive. And who knows? Maybe they'll be inspired by you and start making changes for themselves as well :)
  • NikkiSixGuns
    NikkiSixGuns Posts: 630 Member
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    I don't think you're wrong for distancing yourself from them if you've decided that their lifestyle and life goals aren't in tune with yours. We usually become friends with people that we share things in common with, and when those things change sometimes the friendships weaken or evaporate. If you've chosen a new lifestyle that doesn't mesh well with theirs, then I think that it's normal that you'll distance yourself.

    That said, I also think you can still be close friends with and spend lots of time with people whose eating habits are much different than your own. Being around the temptation can be tough, but ultimately it's your choice to refrain from eating the junk that's around them. If you really enjoy their company, then I'd say keep spending time with them. Just remember that the choice is yours and you don't have to eat what they're eating.

    BTW, congrats on your weight loss so far!
  • CarolinaMoon76
    CarolinaMoon76 Posts: 78
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    I can see why you feel the need to distance yourself at the moment but it would be a shame to fall out with your friends because you don't feel that you can't be around them or talk to them about it. Could you say something in a nice way? Like "guys I am really trying to eat healthy and I have no willpower around you and want to grab those snacks off you and gobble them", sort fof make a joke of it in a way and maybe suggest activities that don't involve eating - asking them to come walking?
  • mikka050
    mikka050 Posts: 34
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    You could just be honest and tell them that you really want to eat healthy food and that going to the cafeteria or such like is just too tempting for you.

    Good luck and well done for making that lifestyle change even though it must have been hard to leave a group of friends behind.

    Rachael x

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