I quit!! Just isn't worth the hard work!!

rmchan
rmchan Posts: 152 Member
edited September 20 in Motivation and Support
Well today I have decided to quit counting calories, quit training/running/weight training! I just don't have it in me to keep going! I'm at the breaking point! Ya'll know my story by now..I'm working my fool self to death..Spending a lot of time away from my family going to races, riding bikes, and training for this 1/2 marathon I signed up for in April...and I haven't lost but 10 pds in 8months and it hurts that I put forth so much effort for no results and I'm not a quitter but today I am..cause I can't do it anymore! I've tried everything...eating more calories, eating all my exercise calories, saving a few...I already only eat whole wheat/whole grains, lean meats, veggies, some fruit..gave up diet coke...I've given up a lot! And If I hear one more time that I'm building muscle and that it weighs more..I will just scream! because eventually the weight loss would happen! And I would be losing inches...NOT!! Not another day! I'm gonna live and be happy and do what I want! I'm tired of this making me miserable!
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Replies

  • GinaB30
    GinaB30 Posts: 725 Member
    =o(
    So sorry that you are having a hard time..
    Sounds like this hasn't become a fun journey for you, but one that you are dreading. Maybe the stress of it all is holding weight on?
    I don't know what to say, but I wish you happiness whatever you choose.
  • PaulaDygert
    PaulaDygert Posts: 148 Member
    I am sorry you feel that way. It can be very frustrating. We will joyfully welcome you back if you change your mind. Spending time with family is very important. Have fun and enjoy your family while you can.
  • nehtaeh
    nehtaeh Posts: 2,849 Member
    I don't know your story. I understand how you feel. I just haven't put in the effort you have, but would hate if I did and still saw no results.

    Have you gone to the dr? I'm sorry if you've been through this whole issues before. Maybe there is something going on in your body - hormone-wise or other - that is getting in the way of all your hard work from paying off like it should.
  • sweetbn
    sweetbn Posts: 318
    Can you make your food diary public - maybe we can see what you're doing and offer advice?
  • LittleSpy
    LittleSpy Posts: 6,754 Member
    I don't know your story but my best guess is that you're not eating enough. Also, have you been cleared of possible medical conditions?

    Quitting your health is the same as quitting your life. :ohwell:

    Also, I guess I just don't understand why you're so irritated about working hard. You shouldn't make changes you can't continue for the rest of your life. Otherwise, when you stop doing those things, you're going to gain everything back anyway. I work hard, but I enjoy it and I haven't made any changes that I can't continue forever very comfortably. Maybe instead of working yourself into the ground, you can focus more and work harder on making lifestyle changes you can be comfortable with.
  • chocolateandvodka
    chocolateandvodka Posts: 1,850 Member
    Before you decide to give up all together - here's just a few thoughts. First - you may be expecting too much of your body at once. Introducing and eliminating several things at once can be difficult if not dangerous. Some might disagree with me on this, but quitting might be a valid option! If i were you, i would slow down, maybe not count calories, not worry about getting all of your fibers and waters and this and that but don't completely go crazy and eat a gallon of ice cream while watching a Desperate Housewives marathon. That would be reserved for a break-up situation. JK :)
    As you let go of the "diet rules" without making decidedly unhealthy choices, perhaps focus on just toning or just cardio or somethiing simple. maybe doing yoga or quick reps 3 times a week for 15-20 minutes. It would require a lot less energy and stress and you might actually see some positive changes. (P.S. i would still recommend journaling your food intake.)
    All of this is of course assuming there isn't a biological issue that is affecting your weight. Have you seen a doctor and been checked for thyroid issues, diabetes or anything that might be sandbagging the scale?
  • cptkalka
    cptkalka Posts: 7 Member
    Hi RMChan-
    I'm coming in here a little late and just read this latest post as well as a few within the last few weeks. I need to ask, are you eating ENOUGH calories? It seems you are pretty active with your working out.. 2 hours at the gym, training for a half marathon... you may not be bringing in enough calories. is there a way we (I) can check out your daily program?
  • shaggys
    shaggys Posts: 140 Member
    :flowerforyou:
    Hey!Don't be silly!The watched pot never boils!
    You have to be incredibly healthy,have you lost inches?
    What kind of foods are you eating?Is it possible that you are eating a lot of sugar?Is your diary visible?
    Please don' t give up on the half marathon-they are so much fun and you feel like a super hero when you are done!
    Persistence always pays off,you WILL get there:smile:
  • I truly know how you feel. For the last 6 months I have tried everything short of starving myself and that's what everyone would tell me-"muscle weighs more than fat...". I hate that speech. If I were you, I would just let go of all the hard parts of losing weight-the calorie counting, drinking only water, killing yourself with exercise-and just live a healthy lifestyle. Maybe once you let the stressful parts of dieting go and get a little exercise and eat healthy (not necessarily low calorie), you will see a change. I wish you the best of luck and I'm sorry you are going through such a rough, frustrating time.
  • Really....you are going to be happy being over weight....that's the "happy" you are referring to? You are happy buying clothes that are bigger than you'd like....not getting that outfit you want cuz you can't fit into it. I took you a life time to put that weight on....8 months is nothing...what's going on is internal...not to be seen right away....you think you just woke up one day and of my gosh...i'm overweight....

    this site may be for support but come on to quit and say that you are doing so so you can be "happy" i don't buy it...sorry that you see working out and eating right as a hassel.....you are not just doing it for yourself but for your overall health and your family....get a trainer...a nutritionist....maybe you are not eating the right combinaiton of food maybe you are not doing the proper fat burning exercises that you should....get nutrisystem for a while see if the weight comes off then in conjunction with your workouts...then you will know that you have done everything...then you can quit and go be "happy" good luck with that.....i wish you luck on that. i mean that i started this because i wasn't happy and eventhough it is hard work...it's worth it.
  • stormieweather
    stormieweather Posts: 2,549 Member
    I know how ya feel. Been at this since last June and stopped losing weight the end of August. Not a pound or inch since. Tried every dang thing I know to try including having my metabolism tested. But, giving up won't help me and I have no desire to go back to eating unhealthy foods. So, I've decided not to worry about it anymore :). Just eat right, exercise, and let my weight do whatever it's going to do. I have no ticker because that is not my method of measurement. Feeling good is.

    Maybe you do need to cut back some...do something fun with the family as exercise (frisbee or softball or skiing or similar) instead of grinding out mile after mile for a race. You know how to eat now, just let it happen naturally and focus on enjoying life for a while.

    :flowerforyou:
  • Hi. From one fellow Georgian to another. I wish you wouldn't give up. But if you must , take a break for awhile and if you decide to come back we will all be here for you. Good Luck and I hope you change your mind.:flowerforyou:
  • jdcole67
    jdcole67 Posts: 108 Member
    We all have frustrations when it comes to body image and weight loss...I have gained and lost 100's of pounds over my lifetime, and after losing 70 pounds 5 years ago, gained it all back (and then some) when I "gave up" because it was too hard to continue...so here I am again, now with 110 pounds to lose, and even then I will not be at my ideal weight, just a lot closer...

    I hope you reconsider, and realize that while you may have only lost 10 pounds in weight, think of all the other benefits you have gained through living a healthier lifestyle...you have probably added years to your life and reduced your chances for many diseases that are the result of being a sedentary couch potato...

    Whatever you decide, I wish you the best of luck and pray that you find your happiness...
  • sweetbn
    sweetbn Posts: 318
    Also - have you gone to your doctor - maybe you have a thyroid issue?
  • It is such a coincidence that you posted this today. I have been trying, but sometimes it is SO hard to pass up on a treat. And even if I stay under calories, it seems I don't go anywhere. I weighed myself this morning and I gained back 2 pounds. It is so frustrating. I am not doing all the exercise you are, but I am being active. I'm not ready to quit, though. And before you do, I think you need to make yourself happy. Maybe change some things up, give yourself some slack. Maybe you are pushing yourself too hard and you just need to take a break. The fact that after all this time you have kept from gaining weight is great. And just so you know, your message made me feel better. Your frustration put mine in perspective! :grumble:
  • texaslady1
    texaslady1 Posts: 7 Member
    I completely understand. Have been there. It is so very, very frustrating, I know. How many times have I said the same thing. "It is just not worth all this effort...for what?" I am on a weight loss plan......yet again. But this time I am more realistic in my goals. Yes, I am counting calories for now just so I can get on track again and drop the bad habits that slowly crept back into my eating. I have come to realize that I will never stay be and stay skinny but I can be healthy. That is my goal. I can lose some weight, but the times I have been at what I wanted to be my "ideal" weight, I just can't keep it off. My body just won't cooperate. Learning from previous "health kicks" I am now setting realistic exercise goals. I have learned that I don't have to kill myself at the gym to lose some weight and get healthier. I am learning to love myself - warts, fat, weaknesses, issues and all. I will continue to try to improve myself in many ways, but I will not let it take over my life. I will be content to do the best I can and be healthy, one step at a time, one minute at a time, one day at a time. I am so sorry you are so discouraged. I so know how you feel. Which is why I on a different path now. Getting healthy and feeling better. I am a young grandmother and I want to see my grandkids graduate high school and marry. God willing. I hope tomorrow is a better day for you. You know you are perfect in God's eyes. Let it all go and just be good to yourself and your body.
  • BrendaLee
    BrendaLee Posts: 4,463 Member
    It seems like you definitely need a break, but it also sounds like you were pushing yourself way too hard. I'm sure all of your efforts were not in vain- you must be/feel healthier? Why not find a light exercise you enjoy (possibly with your family), keep eating healthy and try to relax for a bit. Quitting isn't really an option, I don't think...if it were possible to be happy where you are, you probably wouldn't have tried to make a change in the first place.

    If you haven't already, have your doctor do up a bloodwork panel for you to make sure everything's ok in that department.
  • Missouwechanged
    Missouwechanged Posts: 963 Member
    Your happiness is the most important thing in your life. If you're not happy, it will affect your family life and every other aspect of it. Maybe you could slow down a lot and not give up your exercises totally. You know what is best for you. This morning I finally reached the 10 pounds lost mark and Thursday will be my 12 months anniversary into this new life style. It also has been months since I haven't lost an inch. What keeps me going is the fact that I feel so much better than I did a year ago. Maybe you shouldn't concentrate on marathons and races, maybe you should concentrate on yourself. YOU are important!!!

    Take care :heart:
  • I'm sorry to hear about your lack of success. It can be very disheartening sometimes, how much work this sort of thing takes. I'm with you, though. If I'm not making very much progress and I have a child to take care of, I'd choose being with that child over running some marathon anyday. Your family needs you, and they'll love you whether you're skinny or not. Especially if you have younger kids, because one day you're going to see them off to college and regret not spending more time with them when they were younger.

    Maybe one day when the kids are out of the house and you have the free time you can come back and try something new. Until then live your life, because you've only got one.

    : )

    ~Elliot
  • kylek1
    kylek1 Posts: 1
    Dont ever give up dont ever quit . Tomorrow could be the minute you loose 5 lbs . Trust me Im in the same boat as you Ieat roughly 1700-1800 calories a day I weight train in the am I do 6 spin classes a week most back to back . And then when the weekends come I mtn bike and road bike 100-150 miles in two days and I have lost 15 lbs thats it and I have been doing this for 9 months every freaking week .
    Just dont quit now life is a marathon and this battle is the longest marathon you will ever run .
  • lgblack
    lgblack Posts: 73 Member
    Perhaps you should see a nutritionist. They may be able to determine how your body metabolizes food and put you on a successful track. Although numbers may not be doing what you would like (and we all know how we like those numbers to go down), you are likely in AMAZING physical shape. So from the interior of your body...I am sure it thinks your efforts are worth the hard work!!! blood pressure, cholesterol, flexibility, endurance, heart muscle, lung capacity.....it is worth it, but perhaps you need different help at this point.
  • cdavis1126
    cdavis1126 Posts: 302 Member
    Maybe you need to look at weight loss from a different angle. I've lost 53 lbs since October. www.myfoodlovers.com
  • lgblack
    lgblack Posts: 73 Member
    One thing to say here.....I chose kids over myself. But the role model I set for my girls was not one of being physically active and looking after my body and my health. I am in great health, regardless...but I regret not being a better role model for them pertaining to exercise. One is 21 and carrying 30 extra lbs. The other is 19 and all her weight goes to her hips. The younger one was doing Taekwondo...and as soon as school got too busy and she had to let it go....the weight increased. She now has 20-25 lbs to lose too. Girls these days NEED physical activity. Be that role model for them. It is all about balance. Try to incorporate them into your daily exercise. Play with them and introduce them to fun fitness activities that they can enjoy for life. make it part of their day...every day.
  • Missouwechanged
    Missouwechanged Posts: 963 Member
    Remember one more thing, if you really wanted to quit, would you have posted your message or would have you terminated your account with MFP?
  • godblessourhome
    godblessourhome Posts: 3,892 Member
    i can empathize with how you are feeling! that is so frustrating and discouraging! i am finally in a place where i can lose 1 pound a month. ONE POUND A MONTH! that is only 12 pounds a year and i watch people on mpf lose that in their first month here. *jealous* and yet, i am happy with that because the year before that, i tried everything, nearly killed myself with exercise and lost nothing. NOTHING! i was working hard and had no results. it was so draining and i felt deprived and resentful. you really so need to go see your doctor and make sure you don't have insulin resistance, diabetes, a thyroid issue, etc. good luck sweetie! i am praying for you.
    dawn
  • CasperO
    CasperO Posts: 2,913 Member
    See your doctor, something is wrong. Gotta be. Bless you,
  • nehtaeh
    nehtaeh Posts: 2,849 Member
    I keep coming back here hoping that you've come back and responded. Maybe you are done.

    I have to say that I am shocked by a few of the responses. They are very negative. We've all been there - no need to kick her while she's down.
  • lvfunandfit
    lvfunandfit Posts: 654 Member
    Don't quit. You may be doing too much cardio, not eating enough protein, etc. When I was training for a half marathon I actually didn' t lose a lb in 4 months. It's a lot of running... When I stopped running so much is when the lbs started coming off. BUT, I did develop some nice muscle tone so I make sure to run 5-10 miles per week. I like how it defines my body. When I started eating back my exercise calories I noticed the scale moving. Your food log isn't public. You may just need a little tweak here and there to your exercise and food intake. I'd be happy to help you.
  • nolachick
    nolachick Posts: 3,278 Member
    ok I haven't read all the posts, so sorry if I'm repeating something here but....My two cents in this is perhaps you should slow it down, try to incorporate health and exercise with your family.
    Example on weekends - cooking together favorite healthy meals , they don't have to be boring they can be fun like, create your own pizza using healthy veggies and low fat cheese on wheat crust or tacos with ground turkey and low fat cheese, low fat sour cream, etc.

    how bout family exercise like playing sports going to the park, anything that involves moving around.

    try to be creative and like someone else said, make LIFESTYLE changes so that they can fit easily into your life.

    take it a step at a time - too much at once is very difficult to keep up with. try eliminating one thing at a time and adding one thing at a time.......
    Example, Week 1 - no soda,
    Week 2 - no eating out
    week 3 - start cooking more meals at home

    go from there.
  • whyflysouth
    whyflysouth Posts: 308 Member
    I'm not sure what quitting is, but I hope you don't go on an eating binge and hurt your body.

    I think one problem is the obsessive focus we all have on actual weight as being that which defines whether we are healthy or not. I'm sure you would lose weight if all you eat was lettuce nonstop everyday but you wouldn't be healthy, right? If you are suffering in some way then you should do what you can to reduce the suffering without hurting your body in turn.

    You weight loss might stall but your overall health should be improving. I know it's hard to measure that and that's why we use the scale as or indicator of health but sometimes the scale isn't effective. And if the new habits you've picked up at MFP haven't improved your health then I'd really be surprised.

    The whole calorie counting thing is a pain in the $%#, I'll admit that. I bought a scale to help me and I weigh everything but it's still a pain b/c so many things in MFP goes by volume rather than weight. Bought a HRM to see how many cals I'm burning, "doing everything right" by keeping cals below, etc., and still not losing weight. And somehow the cals in, cals out law that all this calorie counting is for... the idea that got you motivated to do all this tracking and logging, the rule that says that you should be down a pound this week, and down another next week, etc just isn't applying and you feel ripped off...

    and it's b/c of that dang scale! Why don't you test your health somehow? Get your % body fat tested, do some kind of fitness test and get some numbers written down, make a goal for yourself and make that the focus rather than your weight! I assure you it will help you along this journey much more.
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