Went on a binge :(

Did anyone else have a horrible case of the Mondays? I had a horrible day, hated every minute of work and went to the gym after work. I don't know what it is but Mondays are always the days where all the pretty girls are at the gym. I go almost every day and swear these girls are never there except on Mondays I got on the treadmill to start my walk but I felt like my body weighed so much I could hardly lift myself up. I decided to move to the arc trainer then felt the same an finally decided on the exercise bike. I worked out about 20 minutes then just got up and left. I left! I always work out at least 40 mins of cardio and weights when I go but I just felt so "over it."

I then decided I really wanted some Chinese food so I went to my favorite old place (where I hadn't been since early July). I ordered the sesame chicken with fried rice and an egg roll. I squeezed into the booth (barely) and waited for my food. I felt like everyone in there was looking at me, the fat girl and her fried food dinner. When it came the food was so hot I burned my mouth a bit with the first bite but I kept on eating. It tasted ****ing fantastic, better than I remembered. I ate every last piece. Then on the way home McDonald's had a sign for the eggnog shake so I decided why not top off the night with a small shake? I felt so full I just came home laid down in bed and cried.

I think tomorrow I am going to make an appointment with someone because my problem is emotional eating. I just want to have someone tell me it will all be ok. I feel like such a failure.
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Replies

  • AggieFan2011
    AggieFan2011 Posts: 551 Member
    First off I think you are smart in recognizing that you have a problem with emotional eating. I used to be right there with you. Food is where I found my comfort and what I went to when I was upset. Sad, but very very true. I promise it will be ok though! Everyone has a day where they fall of the bike, but the important thing is that you get up, dust yourself off, and get right back on and start riding again! Shake off the bad day and promise yourself that you aren't going to let the slip up define you and your ability to ultimately succeed in achieving your weight loss goals. I know you can do it! We all have our bad days, but we can't let those bad days dictate how the rest of them turn out. :smile:
  • sam308lbs
    sam308lbs Posts: 1,936 Member
    i checked your diary and you were over by just 300 calories.You need 3500 calories to gain a pound!! It wil take a while( more like years of control) for you to be totally under control of your emotional eating..everyone drifts once in a while even those who have lost more than 100 pounds..but the reason why their weight loss lasts is that they can forgive themselves,dust off and move forward.Dont sweat over it..burn off extra 300 calories today and you are even :)
  • ferrytrip
    ferrytrip Posts: 497 Member
    I binged today in the middle of the Afternoon with an 12 hour shift ahead of me @ work. Ended up about 200 calories over my goal.
  • mstocks80
    mstocks80 Posts: 16 Member
    Girl you should be so proud of what you have accomplished. You have lost weight...so what you are doing is working. Don't let one bad evening (it wasn't the whole day...just part of it) ruin your confidence! You are amazing and strong. The fact that you recognize having a binge problem...is the first step to fixing it. I personally just started back to MFP today due to the fact that I lost 20 lbs and GAINED ALL OF IT BACK!! :( I got depressed and left MFP...then the other day I caught myself having a snack...and another snack...and another...and another. I was full but just couldn't stop shoving food in my mouth!! I have an appt. with a psychiatrist on Thursday. I have to get things in my head figured out before I can get the rest of me in shape :) BUT together...we so got this! Keep up your good work and just work off those calories today ;)
  • losing weight is hard business without being a comfort eater... as such you need double the strength to fight those urges...

    when things were going wrong I felt the need to eat (and I still do)... not only sweets but anything edible that catches my eye... after munching anything that caught my glimpse I would feel better for a while... but soon enough I would feel bad again and even worse when it came to mind what I have done... great disappointment to say the least... :/

    coping with emotional issues is not easy... but somehow you have to find the strength to stop ruining your silhouette in the meantime.... you have to put some effort into it... a lot actually.... :)

    what I do?... I don't stock pile food in the cupboards and fridge anymore to avoid temptation... I buy lots of fruit for home and office... when I'm feeling blue I try to go out... see friends, go for a coffee, visit a bookshop to find a good book etc...
  • Zomoniac
    Zomoniac Posts: 1,169 Member
    *A* binge? When you're doing it every day you have a problem. Give yourself a slap and start again.
  • Lisa760
    Lisa760 Posts: 113 Member
    Pffft. That was yesterday. Today is a NEW day. Pick yourself back up and get moving. Any movement forward is good, no one said you have to be exactly at or under your daily calories every-single-day. You went over by like 300 calories, seriously no biggie. If you factor in other days when you were under calories, everything evens out and you actually come out ahead.

    Seeing someone about your emotional eating is probably a good idea. Hopefully you can get a better understand of why you turn to food to feel better. Then you can learn strategies to avoid to pitfalls of binging.

    Hang in there girl. Make today a kick-*kitten* day.
  • crystalbluewolf13
    crystalbluewolf13 Posts: 197 Member
    you had a weak moment hun it happens. you know you've done it and your getting on the right track by trying to talk to someone :) keep your chin up today is a new day!
  • No wonder you are such a failure..
    you just give up every time by crying and hope people here will say "it's okay"

    Well It's not okay.
    If you think you eat to much or you are too fat then work you *kitten* off
    take no excuse

    Mean. Don't agree with your method of "motivation".
  • pyrowill
    pyrowill Posts: 1,163 Member
    I posted this the other day about going ona binge. i think it might help you. I had a huge binge, but then was smart the rest of the day, and saw how everything even outs on the average. Look. This was before I ate sundays cals. But still I ended up finishing that week 23 cals under average.

    Just learn from your errors and realise that in the grand scheme of things, a day doesnt mean jack *kitten*.

    E9C63F9B-6CDB-4D3E-9586-909E7D000DDD-11822-00000C5109C525D6.jpg
  • wildapril
    wildapril Posts: 97 Member
    So you were 300 calories over for that day. But you were 5-600 calories under for the two days before it. You're still at a calorie deficit. I don't see what you're worried about? ?? Not trying to be rude! Just asking!
  • louiseshaw88
    louiseshaw88 Posts: 132 Member
    No wonder you are such a failure..
    you just give up every time by crying and hope people here will say "it's okay"

    Well It's not okay.
    If you think you eat to much or you are too fat then work you *kitten* off
    take no excuse


    Are you for real ? .....Keyboard warrior
  • kgb6days
    kgb6days Posts: 880 Member
    I'd say you're feeling pretty normal (and a bit sorry for yourself). Do you think everyone here eats perfectly every single day of their life. Not happening. My whole weekend sucked. I ate Mexican, Outback, apple pie and coffee cake. Am I back at healthy again - yep. This is not a diet. It's a lifestyle change. I'm not giving up everything I love for the rest of my life. I am learning to eat in moderation, and to make allowances for occasional splurges. Do I occasionally emotionally eat - yep. Do I get back on the good eating train - yep. Lighten
    up. Learn from this an get back at it.
  • fearlesskcl
    fearlesskcl Posts: 159 Member
    No wonder you are such a failure..
    you just give up every time by crying and hope people here will say "it's okay"

    Well It's not okay.
    If you think you eat to much or you are too fat then work you *kitten* off
    take no excuse

    Sorry but that is not motivational that's just rude!
    If you have nothing constructive to say don't say anything!
  • Swissmiss
    Swissmiss Posts: 8,754 Member
    I think that your site name is so sad. You are calling yourself fat. So, why not think of yourself as thin. Imagine it in your mind. That is who you truely are. Stick with it and then change your name to THIN. :heart:
  • Zomoniac
    Zomoniac Posts: 1,169 Member
    No wonder you are such a failure..
    you just give up every time by crying and hope people here will say "it's okay"

    Well It's not okay.
    If you think you eat to much or you are too fat then work you *kitten* off
    take no excuse

    Mean. Don't agree with your method of "motivation".

    Whilst even by my standards that seems excessively blunt, I accept the point. There's way too much niceness and back-slapping in this place. I get people wanting to seem nice and supportive, but sometimes people just need to hear it as it is, not dressed up in some faux-sympathetic patronising way.
  • Jamie_Lauren
    Jamie_Lauren Posts: 211 Member
    No wonder you are such a failure..
    you just give up every time by crying and hope people here will say "it's okay"

    Well It's not okay.
    If you think you eat to much or you are too fat then work you *kitten* off
    take no excuse

    Says the girl who's HW was 60kg.....that's my goal!

    If you can't relate and don't have anything nice to say, then don't
  • MCproptart
    MCproptart Posts: 92 Member
    If you feel like you need professional help for your emotional eating, you probably do--good for you for getting to that point of self-realization.

    As for your binge, it happens. Every time I step on the scale and it's gone up one it puts me off for my whole day--even when I know it's just water and will be gone in a day or so. Most times I can get a good ornery "I'll show YOU" attitude from it and work even harder towards my goal. Some days I just feel like throwing up my hands and saying "what's the use?" You know what, we are imperfect human beings who wouldn't be on this page if we had made only good choices our whole lives.

    The point is to make the best choices we can from this point forward. "After all, tamarrah is anutha day!"
  • louiseshaw88
    louiseshaw88 Posts: 132 Member
    No wonder you are such a failure..
    you just give up every time by crying and hope people here will say "it's okay"

    Well It's not okay.
    If you think you eat to much or you are too fat then work you *kitten* off
    take no excuse

    Mean. Don't agree with your method of "motivation".

    Whilst even by my standards that seems excessively blunt, I accept the point. There's way too much niceness and back-slapping in this place. I get people wanting to seem nice and supportive, but sometimes people just need to hear it as it is, not dressed up in some faux-sympathetic patronising way.

    I agree with you with most posts on MFP but in a post where someone seems emotionally fragile that tactic will have the reverse affect and only making the issue worse - there is a difference between motivation and support
  • girllovedcupcakes
    girllovedcupcakes Posts: 109 Member
    I was only over by 300 because I estimated my calories I went to a local place that isn't in the database.
  • pyrowill
    pyrowill Posts: 1,163 Member
    300 is NOTHING. Stop worrying.
  • Miche11e5
    Miche11e5 Posts: 114 Member
    You're doing SO WELL! One lousy meal/day does not define you as long as you don't let it. We all have them. If you feel you need some help, get it. But please don't let one meal derail all you have accomplished!

    Stay well,
    Michelle
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
    You only went over by 300? Pat yourself on the back for doing so well. But if your eating is emotional, seeing a counselor is a really good idea. Even if you can stay under calories, emotional eating isn't very good for you.
  • Debbe2
    Debbe2 Posts: 2,071 Member
    Yes get the help you need and surround yourself with positive and successful minded people. Try to stop the self pity and negative talk. I stead try to become your own best friend saying things to yourself that you say to someone you care about and want to help support. You'll get through this... Just keep moving forward to your goals and remember be positive and stick to it over the long term. Good luck for your continued success :flowerforyou:
  • susjan
    susjan Posts: 105
    I'm glad that you see that you have a problem with emotional eating... and are going to get help with that. That is a big step and will help you with to recognize triggers. One thing I will say is that your calories for your Chinese food are not correct. There's no way that if you ate the entire portion of what they gave you, it was only 1/2 cup of rice and 8 oz of chicken. Also, your egg roll has zero fat grams and we know that not to be true.

    I'm not trying to be rude, I'm just being real. Everyone slips and you just have to keep on going on and making the best choices you can make...
  • msshiraz
    msshiraz Posts: 327 Member
    No wonder you are such a failure..
    you just give up every time by crying and hope people here will say "it's okay"

    Well It's not okay.
    If you think you eat to much or you are too fat then work you *kitten* off
    take no excuse

    Mean. Don't agree with your method of "motivation".

    I am wondering if this post was deleted, not seeing it anymore.

    Oh and to those saying, oh you know there is just too much niceness going on here, too many pats on the back, get off the motivation and support threads! Normally I don't respond to such levels of ignorance, but our original OP had a lot of courage to post her problems with Monday, consequences and how she felt after. And because she posted, likely she'll think twice about how she felt. I am wondering snide commentor, have you ever faced losing signicant amounts of weight? Unless you are her therapist, or her mother, don't go there.
  • julieh391
    julieh391 Posts: 683 Member
    You are consistently under and had one crappy day. Assuming the several days before it are accurate, you have nothing to worry about. Kick *kitten* today and carry on. And drink lots of water. No worries! You clearly know how to lose weight. You've lost 54 POUNDS! You've got this! :flowerforyou:
  • Dave198lbs
    Dave198lbs Posts: 8,810 Member
    not really a crappy day at all. you didnt log the 20 minutes of exercise and even without it you were probably still in a deficit with only 300 over. I think your issue is perspective.

    I used to binge over by 4000 (ya four thousand calories) in one day...so you are over reacting which is sort of normal here.

    you didnt blow it by no means

    keep on keepin on
  • I also went over on my calories yesterday. I went to the Pittsburgh Steelers game with my boyfriend and afterwards at around 2am when we arrived back in my hometown, we stopped at Steak N Shake. I went 1,500 calories over my daily limit. I felt absolutely horrible about it but the only thing to do is get right back on that horse and keep riding! lol I had been doing so good for about a week and a half, not going over my calories at all.. then yesterday I just pigged out. Oh well, I say. The past is the past, and today is a new day.

    Btw, I totally know what you mean about the pretty girls at the gym. I used to have a membership and some of the girls at the gym I went to would literally sit there and make fun of people while working out. They are just mean girls. Don't let them bring you down. You are there to work on yourself. Try to ignore them and do your own thing! You are doing great! Keep it up!
  • sin485
    sin485 Posts: 125 Member
    No wonder you are such a failure..
    you just give up every time by crying and hope people here will say "it's okay"

    Well It's not okay.
    If you think you eat to much or you are too fat then work you *kitten* off
    take no excuse

    Mean. Don't agree with your method of "motivation".

    wow your a bit**

    the first comment btw not the second :P