I am my own worst enemy

Options
Skinny_Kitty
Skinny_Kitty Posts: 136 Member
in Motivation and Support
My intentions are good.... I WANT to lose weight. I want to be thin and healthy and happy. I want to fit into my clothes again.........

BUT I can't seem to stay motivated or determined. I love food and have no will power when it comes to eating, both what I eat and how much I eat. I see people all around me get motivated and stick with it. My friend has lost over 150 lbs and my boss just hit her 100lb mark.... and here I am..... getting fatter and fatter.

How do you stay motivated? What has worked for you?

I'm 30 years old... my metabolism has stopped and I sit at a desk all day long. By the time I get home from work, cook dinner for my husband and clean up.... I'm exhausted and just want to sit and relax. I never work out. I'm in horrible shape and I feel myself getting worse and worse.

I've hit the bottom and I'm throwing my hands in the air... begging for help.
«13

Replies

  • YoungDoc2B
    YoungDoc2B Posts: 1,593 Member
    Options
    You have to really WANT it. Something internally has to click. Until then, there's nothing anybody can say to you to jumpstart your motivation. You'll do it when you're truly ready.
  • HDimple
    HDimple Posts: 70
    Options
    even i had lost all the hopes
    bt tumblr helpd me alot thete are many tumblr wch motivate u
    http://beforeandafterweightloss.tumblr.com/
    like this :)
  • laserturkey
    laserturkey Posts: 1,680 Member
    Options
    What kind of goals have you been setting for yourself? Have you been eliminating foods you love from your diet so you feel deprived? I recommend you set your calorie goal as high as you can and still lose weight slowly. Maybe tell MFP you want to lose a half pound a week. Then log everything you eat and try to be at or just below that calorie goal. Eat any foods you like, as long as you stay within those calories. Once you get used to doing that, you can fine tune to eat healthier stuff or eat a little less to lose more quickly. But I think the best way for you might be to ease into this lifestyle change gradually. Then you can get used to eating mindfully without feeling deprived.
  • nadz6012
    nadz6012 Posts: 126 Member
    Options
    You don't have to exercise to lose weight! Diet is definitely the most important part of weight loss.

    I think the best way to begin is incrementally. Slow down on the soda, then stop completely. Then introduce a salad for lunch, etc. Slow and steady progress towards a goal, I think, is the best way to get there without feeling like you're depriving yourself.

    The motivation can only come from inside you. No one can give you that. Just know that you can do it too!
  • kaypat09
    kaypat09 Posts: 130 Member
    Options
    You have to really WANT it. Something internally has to click. Until then, there's nothing anybody can say to you to jumpstart your motivation. You'll do it when you're truly ready.

    ^ This.

    When you start working out, you'll want to work out more.
    When you start eating healthfully, you'll make it a habit.

    The losses will motivate you.
    Seeing how far you've come will motivate you.
  • GabrielMaestas
    GabrielMaestas Posts: 88 Member
    Options
    The two primary forms of motivation are recognition of ones negative standing (like hitting rock bottom) AND small successes one must also recognize. I just noticed you mention the desire to be 'skinny' when it will probably serve you better to say, and internalize, 'I want to be one pound lighter this week.' Phrases like those help keep your mind and spirit in perspective and reinforce accomplishment. Also, you said you don't workout (or something to that effect) when maybe all you need to tell yourself is 'I'm going to be more active today and take a walk after dinner, even though I'm tired.' This will help you learn to overcome obstacles. Lastly, don't throw your hands up yo. Put 'em together and say 'it's time to get to work.' :)
  • Honey_bearz
    Honey_bearz Posts: 15
    Options
    You need to seriously think about it. If it's something you really really want than your husband will help. Tell him to keep you on the right track too. You need to find a time when you can go to the gym, or go jogging or whatever. I spent so long knowing and wanting to do something but it wasn't until I got a new job next to a gym that I actually joined and started taking weight loss seriously. You need to find your own motivation. Being around inspirational people who have lost huge amounts should help! Something you can 100% do as well, BUT ONLY IF YOU DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT :) Good luck.
  • itsmyvwbeetle
    itsmyvwbeetle Posts: 272 Member
    Options
    You have to want it bad enough to make it happen. Wanting it but not doing it wont help!! Take baby steps if you need too. Pick something small that you need to change and change it. After that is successful, pick something else and change it. Once you get into the swing of things and on a roll you be just fine.
  • Honey_bearz
    Honey_bearz Posts: 15
    Options
    even i had lost all the hopes
    bt tumblr helpd me alot thete are many tumblr wch motivate u
    http://beforeandafterweightloss.tumblr.com/
    like this :)

    Cheers for this :)
  • YogaNikki
    YogaNikki Posts: 284 Member
    Options
    It's simple - It's not a priority for you you yet.

    I made getting fit a priority by working out the minute I get home from my 9-5 desk job. No excuses. No sitting down. Sure, I'm tired, but I don't give myself the out because feeling good about the way I look is a priority to me. There's no price tag on how I feel when I go out and know that I look good, having made my health my number one priority. My hubby understands and we eat a little later. Maybe the kitchen isn't as "spic and span" as I would like it to be, but, again, my weight loss and staying healthy is a priority.

    Until you make that mental switch on your own, no one else can do it for you. There's no magic pill. It has to be a battle between you and yourself that you win.

    Keep your head up!!!
  • _crafty_
    _crafty_ Posts: 1,682 Member
    Options
    You have to really WANT it. Something internally has to click. Until then, there's nothing anybody can say to you to jumpstart your motivation. You'll do it when you're truly ready.

    ^ This.

    When you start working out, you'll want to work out more.
    When you start eating healthfully, you'll make it a habit.

    The losses will motivate you.
    Seeing how far you've come will motivate you.

    ^ both of these

    plus looking good naked has it's benefits
  • FitBeto
    FitBeto Posts: 2,121 Member
    Options
    I get up at 3am, take care of baby, make my girlfriend breakfast, get to work by 6, have a tech support job (on my feet, moving heavy equiptment) for about 8.5 hours, get off, usually go shopping, (right when i get home) Get home, immediately workout for 45-60 min, come in, cook dinner, take a shower, take care of baby/play video games, then do yoga, eat some more, then bed.

    I have a decent day, but if its important to you, you will find time to get healthier. If you aren't motivated or wanting to do it, then you just dont want it that bad. You make excuses and then you complain about it on the internet instead of doing something about it. Change a little everyday, you dont have to do out running a mile all at once, but walk more, do some pushups, most definatly diet changes. Dont cut out all your bad food, switch for some craving cutters and one or 2 more servings of healthy food. Make your husband go on a walk with you, and if hes not supportive, that guys gonna have to wait till you get done working out to eat his mother****ingsupper. You can change, lots of people have, what makes you differant?

    :flowerforyou:
  • Skinny_Kitty
    Skinny_Kitty Posts: 136 Member
    Options
    Thank you everyone! I know that it's up to me and only I can motivate myself....

    I put myself at losing 1.5 lbs a week... thats around 1450 cals a day. I KNOW I can do that! I love fried foods, sweet tea and BIG portions...

    I love your idea of taking one thing at a time and slowing down little by little... this way it's not so hard.

    Thanks again everyone!!! :flowerforyou:
  • ahviendha
    ahviendha Posts: 1,291 Member
    Options
    The two primary forms of motivation are recognition of ones negative standing (like hitting rock bottom) AND small successes one must also recognize. I just noticed you mention the desire to be 'skinny' when it will probably serve you better to say, and internalize, 'I want to be one pound lighter this week.' Phrases like those help keep your mind and spirit in perspective and reinforce accomplishment. Also, you said you don't workout (or something to that effect) when maybe all you need to tell yourself is 'I'm going to be more active today and take a walk after dinner, even though I'm tired.' This will help you learn to overcome obstacles. Lastly, don't throw your hands up yo. Put 'em together and say 'it's time to get to work.' :)
    genius!

    small goals!! for me, with 10ish lbs left to lose, i only update my ticker once every 5lbs. seeing "10 left to lose" is discouraging for me, I like it when it's 5 or below.
  • pattie521
    pattie521 Posts: 20
    Options
    You need to set weekly goals for yourself. Nothing that you know you can't reach. Something as simple as doing 10 pushups a day, then add to it each week. Also add maybe every other day 20-30 minutes of walking. Keep track of your food and try to follow it as close as you can. Give yourself a good 1-2 weeks of adjusting your eating. Once you start losing weight you will find yourself working harder at it. It's the initial start that can be hard. If you need a friend to help you out, you are more then welcome to add me, my diary is open.
  • Sick_Beard
    Sick_Beard Posts: 407 Member
    Options
    My best motivation was a broken heart...true story
  • skinnyforhi
    skinnyforhi Posts: 340 Member
    Options
    I can totally relate to being exhausted and sometimes too overwhelmed at the end of the day to feel like doing much of anything--let alone work out.

    The single best thing I did was start forcing myself out of bed at the crack of dawn to work out. There are no competing priorities at that time of day and no time to lose motiviation (like at the end of the day). Once I was doing that, it made it easier for me to control what I was eating--both because I had earned extra calories, and because I know just how much work goes into burning off a cheeseburger!

    Getting up early isn't for everyone and it takes a bit to get used to--but it totally worked for me. I do 2 or 3 different kinds of exercise that I like during the week and it keeps me from getting bored and not wanting to get up and go to the gym. That would be my suggestion. You can do it--you just have to figure out what the obstacles are put some strategies in place to overcome them.
  • DaBossLady24
    DaBossLady24 Posts: 556 Member
    Options
    You have to really WANT it. Something internally has to click. Until then, there's nothing anybody can say to you to jumpstart your motivation. You'll do it when you're truly ready.

    ^^ Exactly this. Set goals for yourself like working out 10 minutes, 15 minutes, 20 minutes... until you get to a point where you're comfortable with how much you're working out. Focus on eating foods that make you feel better and keep all others in moderation (you don't have to completely rid yourself of sweets just because someone else told you to).

    Understand that this is a process. It's a marathon and not a sprint.

    What kept me motivated? I told numerous family members and friends that I was working on losing weight (a few weeks after I started just because I didn't feel like hearing too many comments). I also started a Tumblr page like another poster mentioned.

    Do what you need to do and add friends on here that can help. If you want to, I'm always here to help! :flowerforyou:
  • GoodGhost9
    GoodGhost9 Posts: 23
    Options
    I know exactly how you feel, I was in the same position. Although I still work in an office (people really love to bring in their junk food to share so it's always all over the break room table) I make time for myself to exercise almost every day and eat healthier then I used to. Just start small, set mini goals. If you go balls-to-the-wall like I did at first, you will find yourself falling off track after a month or two. Say you don't change your eating habits but make a goal to drink 6-8 glasses of water a day. Then the next week try to eat a few fruits and veggies every day. Then after that get out and walk three times per week (even if it's a mile, and you can walk indoors if the weather isn't nice where you live, Leslie Sansone has a lot of great walking DVDs). You'll be surprised at how good you feel after only a few days! But like other posters said, you have to truly want it yourself. No one can make you start but you.
  • Pittsburgh_Jackie
    Pittsburgh_Jackie Posts: 1
    Options
    I have been there and I totally understand what you're feeling. I am 5'3" and 260 pounds. After ten years of marriage, two kids, and four major ankle surgeries in the past two years, I hit absolute rock bottom with my body. I had given up trying to lose weight and decided to have gastric bypass. Thankfully, I was talked out of it about two months before it was supposed to take place. I joined a gym, met an amazing trainer, and started using myfitnesspal. Over the past three months, I have lost 15 pounds. I hit a plateau and didn't lose a pound for almost 6 weeks. I fell off the wagon and was eating everything I could get my hands on. Finally, I pulled myself together after two weeks of binge eating and I am back at the gym and tracking my food.

    Every day is a struggle. Every single day. I have no self-control when it comes to food. I don't have any advice for you because frankly, I hate when people give me advice. I just wanted to share my experience and let you know that you are certainly not alone!

Categories