100 lbs, what the...?

FamouslyNoOne
FamouslyNoOne Posts: 6 Member
in Introduce Yourself
It happened. I got on the scale this morning, and according to the BMI charts, I am "officially" 100 lbs overweight. Now, I don't buy into the whole BMI thing, 100%. I've always been the tall athletic girl and at my fittest, with 14% body fat, I still weighed 165 lbs. While, some days, being tall and able to carry some extra weight was a blessing in disguise, it's gotten out of control.

20 lbs didn't show much...neither did 30. 50 lbs heavier, hey, look, my *kitten* is getting wider. 60 lbs, I feel like crap. 80, my knees are starting to hurt and my feet are swelling.

100 f**king pounds later...my self esteem is shot. I have entered into a period of self-loathing the previously confident me has never experienced before, I'm depressed, my sex life is in the toilet because if I don't like myself, I can't fathom how anyone else could, and I'm sick and tired of feeling like this.

I've pretended to diet probably every other week for the last two years. It lasts for a couple of days, then I blow it and throw in the towel. I figure I'll start again next week, and then eat all of the things I want to, to try and sneak it in before I can't eat it again next week. I drink more than I should and my habits are well past self destructive. And now, I teeter on the brink of turning 40.

Unfortunately, I have moved away from the majority of my friends and family and therefore have little in the way of an understanding support network. So, here I am. I'm hoping to find a few like-minded folk to help hold me accountable, lift me up when I need it most and walk with me through this god-awful place I've gotten myself lost in.

Replies

  • bpotts44
    bpotts44 Posts: 1,066 Member
    Don't beat yourself up. Just go to work. Add me if you like. Good luck.
  • Megzfitlog
    Megzfitlog Posts: 35
    Add me if you'd like. I definitely know where you're coming from. This place is great though.
  • vcferlita1
    vcferlita1 Posts: 61
    BMI is very inaccurate, so don't beat yourself up. Feel free to add me too if you like.
  • kristen6022
    kristen6022 Posts: 1,923 Member
    Welcome. I'm a fellow tall women myself and I lived with the "I'm tall, I can keep gaining and no one will know". Until that day when I was approaching a size I had never been and a number on the scale that I realized wasn't good. At that point, I sat down and though of 3 things I could "fix"...reduce soda, when eating out substitute fries for something healthier, and reduce portion sizes. I told myself that if this even helped me get 10 pounds off I was better (but still in the overweight category). In about 4 months I was down 10 pounds, felt better but realized it wasn't enough. Made more changes, mostly diet, and in 4 more months I was down 10 more pounds. I felt on top of the world. I was in my "usual prime" size and happier than a clam. Then I let everything go and in 4 more months I was back up 10 pounds. January 1st of 2012 I made the decision that I was worth it and I was going to make a TOTAL change.

    By June I was 150. I don't remember being 150 in my adult life. But I realized that wasn't good enough. I needed to lift weights and feel good naked. So, I kept eating at a deficient and worked out more - by July I was fit and happy at 143 (Size 4 jeans, SIZE 4...still can't believe it!). I've come back up to 149 now and need to make a few more changes, but I realized that even the smallest change can produce incredible results. I've made a commitment to myself to NEVER let myself get above 160 ever again. Right now and for the next 5 years I'd like to keep under 150, but I know everyone makes mistakes and conditions change...

    I'm not saying the journey is easy, you are going to fail, you are going to give in on temptations, you will skip workouts, but you'll get to your goal and everyone on your friends list will be cheering you on! Good Luck!
  • lorcart
    lorcart Posts: 406 Member
    You have to start somewhere. Start now and don't look back! You've beat yourself up, you've felt bad, now it's time to take control!! Sad time OVER! Start kickin' butt and takin' names!
  • josiea98
    josiea98 Posts: 15 Member
    I'm with Megzfitlog... This place is wonderful for getting you psyched! I was down in the toilet, too, but after baby steps and one calorie at a time, I have managed to get myself into a place where I am stoked. I've made some really good 'pals' here and even joining into a 8-week challenge with a bunch of GREAT people! Come on! Put on a smile, look to the future and don't look back. If you continue to beat on yourself, you'll only sink down farther. :explode: Not good! No need to do that! Friend me if you want some help! Come on! Smile!

    :flowerforyou:

    Josie
  • Iloveeyore78
    Iloveeyore78 Posts: 75 Member
    You can do this!!! First: you acknowledge your current health status. Second: you desire change. Third: you came here which is the BEST support ever for weight loss. Please feel free to add me. I am currently down 66+ lbs with NO GYM and just diet changes. I also tape and measure and am down dozens of inches total as, like you, the scale number is not an accurate guide of my build. Good luck and add me on! :)
  • marycmeadows
    marycmeadows Posts: 1,691 Member
    the bmi charts are crap IMO. Body builders are 'obese'..... stick with it. I was like you at one point..... and almost two years later, I've lost 116.4lbs and still going strong. I was never athletic, never exercised, and I'm getting ready to run my second half marathon (did my first on 11/10/12!) :)

    feel free to add me for support
  • ruthechesney
    ruthechesney Posts: 34 Member
    Please feel free to add me as well...I am a "tall girl" too...I'll cheer you along:) One day, one bite, one move at a time:)
  • Keiras_Mom
    Keiras_Mom Posts: 844 Member
    My 39th birthday really hit me hard--not the age, but the fact that I didn't want to still be fat on my 40th birthday. It can be a great motivator. I'm also tall (5'9") and used all the excuses we allow ourselves. I'm now 40, and within one pound of no longer being overweight! You can do this!
  • andreagreen1974
    andreagreen1974 Posts: 64 Member
    I hear you. I realized I was 150 pounds overweight last christmas at a family wedding, and I said, that's enough. Since then I've lost 93 pounds. It can be done. You just have to make one good choice at a time, set small goals for yourself, and research the right food to eat. If you want to add me, then feel free!
  • ballroomsweetie
    ballroomsweetie Posts: 6
    I'm in same place, but ten years older...so if that gives you any comfort. I'm also planning a 30 day "boot camp" type '"fat farm", cause this has to stop and I need help. I'm very excited to go...and am working on six pounds off right now. Not having any distractions might be good...use this time for yourself. Before you know it you'll be settled into your new local with new friends.
  • mell6355
    mell6355 Posts: 171 Member
    I am over the 2 month hump, lost 28 pounds and have 30 something or more to go. I am 5'11" and also fell into the I am tall enough to carry the weight mentality. This year has been my eye opener and next year will bring a whole new world! Can't wait to do healthy things and enjoy them! Feel free to add me to your support team!
  • afatwomanonamission
    afatwomanonamission Posts: 39 Member
    I totally understand where you're coming from; one day I was 220 pounds (which was not great, but on my frame somehow didn't look awful) and then suddenly I just packed on more and more weight until I was nearly 300 pounds - it was a terrifying realization that really changed my perception of myself. If you want support, I'm totally here for you - I'm new to the game and just starting out myself (only started my 'lifestyle change' on October 9th) but I do understand. Best wishes!
  • dorothytd
    dorothytd Posts: 1,138 Member
    I have family and friends around, but no one supports a healthy life like my MFP friends. You're in the right place and can get lots of support here. Try to get out of that 100 mindset and set some small goals. Looking at it all at once will make it seem insurmountable. It isn't! You can do it.
  • LeslieC1970
    LeslieC1970 Posts: 160
    Feel free to add me. My experience has not been that different from you.
  • sunshinesquared
    sunshinesquared Posts: 2,733 Member
    Start here...start now, one step at a time! We're all here for the same reason, whether it be 10 lbs. or 100 lbs. Add me if you'd like, i'm here every day and my diary is open.
  • msshiraz
    msshiraz Posts: 327 Member
    you and I are very similar in our body types!! My weight at 165 is as low as I can go with my frame. And I gained the same way- slowly, hidden a lot with my height. But I was lying to myself. Now that you have that rant outta the way- welcome to MFP!

    I'll send you a friend request- weight loss is a journey, not a race! :)
  • skippydotdog
    skippydotdog Posts: 1
    Wow--you are me. Good luck with this, I've only been with it a short time, but I'm loving it. I'm still working on sticking to it--but I am working at it. Open it every day, and keep track--it keeps us honest. Best of luck to you!
  • Niki_Fawn
    Niki_Fawn Posts: 14 Member
    My BMI is inaccurate, I don't let it get me down. I have wide hips, Naturally I am going to weigh more due to my body type.

    Lets get moving together! Add me if you like. I could defenitely use some support.
  • kathymichell
    kathymichell Posts: 1
    I see what you mean with the dieting part which used to be difficult for me too... but if you want I can help you out. Let me know if you are interested. I also started working out and I feel 10x better then before. Don't give up love. ♥:flowerforyou:
  • karag413
    karag413 Posts: 32 Member
    Welcome. We share very similar stories, please feel free to add me. I am a tall woman with larger build as well, though I have been 300+ pounds for most of my adult life. The whole key to weight loss / getting healthy is 99% in your mind. There is no one that can do it FOR you; you have to be ready to do it yourself and you CAN'T beat yourself up when you backslide. Good luck, hope to hear from you soon.
  • nat270
    nat270 Posts: 7 Member
    Your story is my story!! I know the feeling of "pretending" to diet for years. Feeling like I'm depriving myself day in and day out just to get on the scale... and didn't even lose a pound! (or a kg. in my case) So what's the point?? - You are not alone...I feel your pain! ;o) Recently I joined a "fat group" -a group of people that need to lose a lot of weight. We work out at a local gym x3 a week - get weighed in every 2 weeks, have seminars on nutrition and different things. Never imagined myself in a group like that! I thought it wouldn't be challenging enough for me because I need to be challenged. I am very competitive - but it seems to work. I haven't missed out on 1 gym class - even starting to go extra. I'm finally getting my calories under control and it's working. Good luck on your journey... if you need/want any moral support feel free to add me to your friend list.
  • WDEvy
    WDEvy Posts: 814 Member
    Right there with you! I'm on my 11th week of my lifestyle change. Down just a hair short of 20 lbs, already over 10" off. got another 90 lbs to lose. Add me if you want to. I'm very active on here and in for the long haul!
  • cebreisch
    cebreisch Posts: 1,340 Member
    BMI is not the only measure to go by, just like the scale isn't the only number either.

    When I was 28, I married and moved 3 hours from the only life I knew. I was at that time 184 pounds. In March/April 2011, I topped the scales at 376, effectively 200 pounds higher over the course of 17 years. UGH. I've lost just over 100 pounds since then.

    Step 1: no more whining, wallowing, and negative self-talk. It's more destructive than whatever it was that got you here.
    Step 2: Log everything. Every bite you take.
    Step 3: Make small changes in the right direction. Start with logging everyhting, and slowly add things to it that are helpful - drinking more water, focusing on lean-healthy proteins.

    Some blog pages:
    http://baysweightloss.blogspot.com/2012/03/losing-weight.html
    http://baysweightloss.blogspot.com/2012/05/things-that-have-helped-along-way.html
    http://baysweightloss.blogspot.com/2012/05/dealing-with-demons.html
    http://baysweightloss.blogspot.com/2012/06/know-what-youre-aiming-for.html
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
    Your story sounds a lot like mine except my weight came on quite quickly and then I played around with 20-40 pounds for years. Something about "dieting" that I've learned this time around is not to do without those foods you like or want to try. There's no need to deprive yourself! Just eat well and healthy 80-90% of the time and then those little indulgences won't have as big of an influence. We all have different things that work for us but I still think this principle works for just about everyone.

    Good luck!
  • onyxwood
    onyxwood Posts: 45 Member
    wow......reading that was actually like my life story! im sick of "dieting", need a new way of life including healthier eating choices, exercise and boosting my confidence! feel free to add me, i just started on here as well........we can motivate each other! :):happy:
  • mfpcopine
    mfpcopine Posts: 3,093 Member
    Track everything you eat. Start exercising, if you haven't been. I personally would not worry about calculating the estimated calorie burn, as it can be inaccurate. Simply t focus on the accurate recording of your food within your limit. Do not eat more to make up for your exercise unless you are working out vigorously several hours a day.

    Weigh yourself once a week, or more frequently if desired. Use a method of estimating your body fat percentage. No, it won't be as accurate as a scan, but it will provide a baseline.

    One day at a time. It''s almost a cliché, but at times focusing on long-term goals is overwhelming and unproductive.
  • SairahRose
    SairahRose Posts: 412 Member
    Baby steps. Honestly. It might feel so frustrating when you're not losing weight "RIGHT NOW".. but it will come off, and you know you can do it :D *hugs*

    And I agree with you on the BMI thing, it's really not that good.

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