I had a dieting wake-up call.

tattoogrrl28
tattoogrrl28 Posts: 53
in Motivation and Support
I have struggled with my weight, in the form of an eating disorder with a dash of OCD for almost 18 years. I've wasted so much time crying and being miserable and binging and hating myself. I've reached a turning point. My scale broke 2 weeks ago. I wanted to test myself, and see if I could really go a while without weighing. I've had an unhealthy and obsessive need to weigh 6-8 times a day for half my life. So, I go 2 weeks. During that time, I start an already planned new diet for my family I have a son on the autism spectrum and heard alot of success stories about cutting yucky stuff and feeding the all natural foods. So me and both my sons start this. I still log my foods, but I upped my daily calories by 200 and start paying more attention to the quality of my food. I started eating "real" food, not processed diet food with a list of ingredients that I can't pronounce. I also started eating breakfast, not just a granola bar but an actual meal. I ended up going over almost every day! So a few days ago, I buy a scale and literally stand in front of it for 5 minutes shaking with anxiety. The result of turning 15 years of diet habit on its head? I LOST 4 POUNDS! Plus, I feel better, healthier. I know it would be ridiculous for me to think that my problems are finally gone. They aren't. But this gives me a bit of hope that this disorder won't control my life forever. That I can be healthy and happy and not gain weight.

Replies

  • Danilynn1975
    Danilynn1975 Posts: 294 Member
    I think you were doing something right without the little numbers in red to bother your physche. Maybe this should be a new pattern to establish.

    I hope the change is as beneficial to your child as much as it has been for you.
  • shirleygirl910
    shirleygirl910 Posts: 503 Member
    You're making some great choices. I know my body does better the healthier I eat (no processed), I eat my calories like an upside down pyramid. Most of my calories for breakfast tappering off towards dinner. Eating a regular breakfast is so important.

    Try not to rely so much on the scale to measure your success. How do you feel? Is there something that you can do now that you use to have trouble doing or couldn't do at all? How do your clothes feel? How do they look? If you measure your success by NSV moments, you might feel even more sucessful.

    You are doing great. Change is good.
  • athenaheim
    athenaheim Posts: 496 Member
    You are doing a great job.
  • 9jenn9
    9jenn9 Posts: 309 Member
    Good for you! I agree about the scale. Weighing in makes me crazy and usually does more harm than good. Focus on how you feel and eating good stuff. The weight will come off.
  • katevarner
    katevarner Posts: 884 Member
    Congratulations!
  • tattoogrrl28
    tattoogrrl28 Posts: 53
    Thanks everyone! I do feel better. Less migraines and sick belly, more energy and focus. I don't know how much of that is diet and how much is an attitude change. The diet does seem to kind of be helping my son as well. A bit less violent tantrums, which is always a plus. :)

    I think I'm going to start weighing twice a week. I don't know if I'll be able to, but it's a goal to reach for. Thanks for all the encouragement. I'm so sad when I think about how much life I have wasted obsessing and starving and binging and purging. How much damage I've done to myself. I have to keep on the right track, for myself and my kids.
    I would love some more friends on here for mutual encouragement. Add me if you'd like!

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