"Don't lose anymore weight"

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Replies

  • optionalsourcewins
    optionalsourcewins Posts: 457 Member
    I agree with everyone else who advised to ignore them. Listen to yourself. I didn't follow this advise during my first weight loss journey. I listed to people telling me I'd lost enough and needed to eat and I ended up gaining all my weight back plus more. Now I am listening to ME. You have to be happy with yourself.
  • I'm still over 200 pounds, so when someone asks me how much further I plan on going I tell them I'm only about halfway, at which point they get totally horrified. I've been told I'm 'big boned' and I am 'not meant to be as thin as my sister' and that I'll 'look weird' if I lose more weight...

    Some people want you to stay big because it makes them being big more valid. Some people are petty. You should talk to your doctor and make sure there isn't a valid medical reason why you shouldn't lose more -- then explain to him that you still want to lose a bit more, but that you're willing to do another check up in ten pounds or so.

    There is also something to be said for body dismorphia here. I barely see the changes in my body and I'm down 55 pounds. Other people tell me how different I look. If you think you may have body dismorphia then now's a good time to find a therapist to talk to about it.
  • thrld
    thrld Posts: 610 Member
    When the comment "Don't lose anymore weight" comes from someone who has no knowledge of your lifestyle -- then that comment has less authority.

    If your doctor discussed your diet, your lifestyle, your fitness plans, your hobbies, your goals -- then the comment should carry more authority.
  • Franzibear
    Franzibear Posts: 41 Member
    Might be because it is quite shocking to see someone drop a lot of weight (because, well, most people don't do that).

    For Dr. / Secretary, the reason for being so adamant might be that they are worried you are changing in a way that would be hurtful for your health (eating disorder, for example).

    For friends / acquaintances, the reason for nagging might be because they are chubby themselves, and seeing you get fit is making them feel poorly about themselves.

    These are just guesses, but honestly, I think it is an overreaction from everyone really - if you explain that you aren't doing anything fishy, no-one should end up worried..
  • Yaya1976
    Yaya1976 Posts: 357 Member
    Hi there,

    I agree with Johloz- your doctor is not an *kitten*, he/she must have said that for a reason. Did you ask why?
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  • superdeedooper
    superdeedooper Posts: 95 Member
    Your body. Your choice. Just smile politely and keep on keepin' on! :happy:
  • jessready
    jessready Posts: 129 Member
    I would call the doctors office. Ask the nurse to look up your stats on the chart, and ask her/him what is the healthy weight range for you. I believe some people are just trying to be nice when they say don't lose anymore. I wish I would hear the words instead your hard work is really paying off....
  • BeccaLevine
    BeccaLevine Posts: 315 Member
    It used to offend me too, because I thought people were lying to me. They told me 20lbs ago I didn't need to lose more, I showed them! I really hate when people ask me how much more I want to lose and freak out! But the way I see it, if you are looking to get to a realistic weight for your height and body frame, then screw em.
  • 4jamaica
    4jamaica Posts: 69 Member
    I would call the doctors office. Ask the nurse to look up your stats on the chart, and ask her/him what is the healthy weight range for you. I believe some people are just trying to be nice when they say don't lose anymore. I wish I would hear the words instead your hard work is really paying off....

    Definitely follow up with the doctor. This is a doctor that knows you very well, (as well as the rest of your family it appears). She may have spotted signs that your body is under stress from your new lifestyle. She may worry about the rate of your weight loss, or your psychological state.

    Most likely, she just needs reassurance that your weightloss was done thoughtfully and soundly, but it could be that she sees something that you don't. Our self-image is often grossly distorted.
  • If you don't like how you LOOK, why are you hung up on a number on the SCALE? Don't worry about what the scale says, throw it away. Focus on strength training gaining definition and muscle. You will probably weight more, but you will like how look better.

    ^THIS!!!! ^^^^ SERIOUSLY, stop weighing in. Measure yourself, do the 30 Day Shred and re-measure yourself. I guarantee you will be smaller and have more definition. You will prob weigh the same give or take 1-2 lbs but you will be in a smaller size pant and probably like the way you look much more without relying on what the scale says.
  • stljam
    stljam Posts: 512 Member
    I'm beginning to run into this now myself and much like you, I'd rather people handled it differently. Here is how I started looking at it. This language is just their poor way of phrasing a compliment, and it's better than a backhanded compliment at that, lol. I've also come up with some varied responses:

    "Thanks. I'm glad you are happy for the progress I have made. it's been hard work but a lot of fun and very rewarding."
    "Thanks for recognizing how far I have come but I'm still a work in progres. I can't wait to be able to __________________ but I still have some work to be able to get there" Insert next goal achievement - running a marathon, hiking a moutain, doing a triatholon, a personal best on something, whatever
    "you really aren't in a position to judge that until you have seen me naked"
    "you really aren't in a position to judge that unless you have seen me naked and no that's not an offer"
    "i'm glad you think I've reached my goal weight and body composition but like many other things, you and I have different goals."
    The others get more rude so I'll stop there, lol
  • My mother has told me the same thing. She says, "If you lose any more weight you're gonna look like a skeleton.", but I still have belly fat and arm flab. Therefore, I'm still not happy with how I look either. The doctor is probably just basing his opinion on the scale and not on how your trouble zones look.
  • I think when those of us that have been trying to loose weight have been unhappy with our appearance for a long time, we have this "mental" idea of what we want to look like, which may or may not be either realistic or our best look, because we are usually modeling after someone else.

    But one thing is true, too much weight loss doesn't make anybody look good. There is an ideal point and when we start going past that, we start looking sickly. Most people can see that point better than ourselves. Strive for a balance between your height and weight AND your body structure. Strive for healthy not for skinny. It's not an easy thing to see sometimes, especially when it's been a long journey, but balance is the key...

    Enjoy your success but don't go too far...
  • SanDiegoCasey
    SanDiegoCasey Posts: 130 Member
    Personally when people are looking for a logical comeback it's very easy for me to just point to the BF% scale... people (usually parents) tell me I don't have any more weight to lose... I'm like... it's not a subjective opinion here.. It's fact.. I'm at X% that's good, or average, it's not great and great is certainly NOT unhealthy!
  • hannahcall2
    hannahcall2 Posts: 175 Member
    Try and transition your focus from losing weight to toning up and start ignoring the number on the scale. The number that you want to start focusing on is your body fat percentage.
  • momofthreesons
    momofthreesons Posts: 162 Member
    Ignore them if you are still in the healthy weight range go for your goals!! I think a lot of people are conditioned to normal as being too skinny now. Its crazy people tell me to stop losing, I'm wasting away.. honestly im still at the high end of healthy...
  • MsJulielicious
    MsJulielicious Posts: 708 Member
    Is your Dr over weight his/herself? Sometimes this makes a HUGE difference on the sort of medical advice they give regarding weight.
  • kmr72
    kmr72 Posts: 24 Member
    My mom and my mother in law said this to me. My mom couldn't look at me without feeling pity and my in law said I should check myself into the hospital because something was wrong with me. Which there isn't. Me personally I find it funny. I did go from 312 to 155. But I find it to be a compliment. But that's it. Just a compliment...the show(my weight loss journey) must and did go on. They got over it and so will your dr.
  • PunkyRachel
    PunkyRachel Posts: 1,959 Member
    Lots of people say I shouldn't lose more but I am still180 at 5'4" size 10-12 and I do want to lose more, my body is stubborn but I am going to keep trying

    Yep, I'm 5'5 and already being told to stop losing weight by my peers, I'm only down to 185, and a size 12/14. They look at me like I'm insane when I say I want to loose 40 more. lmao just ignore those pesky people
  • Crayvn
    Crayvn Posts: 390 Member
    at my last job i reported 2 women to the HR dept who started harrassing me about how *skinny* i was getting..For the first few months it was compliments... Then they started asking me how much more weight i was going to lose and that my face looked anorexic. I tried to explain to them that they were used to seeing me at 190 lbs and that i was perfectly healthy.

    I was in competition training and was in the mid teens of BF. they really couldnt tell what my body looked liked and how *ripped* I was. if they would have seen my abs they would have shut up really quick...lol

    Sooo..dont worry about what ppl say..they are just haterz :p
  • florymonde
    florymonde Posts: 261 Member
    I would call the doctors office. Ask the nurse to look up your stats on the chart, and ask her/him what is the healthy weight range for you. I believe some people are just trying to be nice when they say don't lose anymore. I wish I would hear the words instead your hard work is really paying off....

    Definitely follow up with the doctor. This is a doctor that knows you very well, (as well as the rest of your family it appears). She may have spotted signs that your body is under stress from your new lifestyle. She may worry about the rate of your weight loss, or your psychological state.

    Most likely, she just needs reassurance that your weightloss was done thoughtfully and soundly, but it could be that she sees something that you don't. Our self-image is often grossly distorted.

    I agree. At 5'7" and 150, you're not likely underweight, but there could be other complicating factors. Doctors aren't infallible, but I don't think you should completely disregard the doctor's opinion, either.
  • saraann4
    saraann4 Posts: 1,296 Member
    Weirdly enough, I've gotten told that I looked "fine" at 210lbs at 5'6" and that I don't need to lose anymore weight. That was from a at least 400lb woman. Then, at that same weight, I got asked if I was done losing weight and I replied NOOO. She preceded to tell me that I didn't need to lose more weight because she fears I will look sick. Perhaps I carry my weight very well in her eyes.Pretty sure she weighs less than I did at the time. Either way, I'm still obese. Go with how you feel until a certain weight then re-evaluate.
  • queenhiphop
    queenhiphop Posts: 286 Member
    My mum has been saying this to my best friend who's lost abot 5 and a half stone. She looks sooo good now and I'm sure my mum is just being caring but whenever my friend comes round my mum's there saying "oh no have a biscuit" it's like aar leave it!
  • amber1533
    amber1533 Posts: 117 Member
    I always get uncomfortable when I heard that from my dad (who is 5'8 and whopping 120lbs soaking wet!!) I lost almost 50lbs my senior year and every time he saw he was like, "wow are you even eating?" and "Don't lose anymore weight!" When I was only 188lbs!!

    I think it's the shock, not that they mean you are being unhealthy or what not. I think it's just that they only see in small increments through your journey and when you are noticeably lighter they comment. Probably not saying the best things, but I would just take them as compliments and reach what goals you have set for yourself (as long as they are healthy!)
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