Sugar cravings sabotaging every effort....

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...to do this the right way. And by 'this', I mean regain weight at a steady, controlled pace to reduce the risk of a relapse.

I envisioned a hellish recovery of course, but never one where I'd consider killing myself. Binges are part and parcel of recovery in 90% of cases - that I've almost come to terms with - but it's almost like I purposely keep walking into these nightmare situations. At first it was a couple of times a week, and now it's nearly every day. In anticipation of the event, and to lessen the damage done, I often resort to restricting. Obviously defeating the whole purpose of trying to beat anorexia.

Simple and empty carbs are the worst. A sugar rush to raise my mood even momentarily. I've even had to get my family to put locks on trigger food cupboards, but I'm a smart/stupid cookie and always find a way around it (or another way to screw up). I'm trying hard not to play the worlds smallest violin but this is crushing me. Some will say 'its a matter of willpower' or 'you just have to learn to control it' but surely if it was that simple I wouldn't be doing it in the first place? I would NOT drive myself to feel this way if I could 'control' it, I can assure you.

As a result I've regained 6 or 7lbs in a month alone and I'm genuinely fearful that eventually this is going to force me back into old behaviours. Does anybody have any advice? Honesty is appreciated but please bear in mind that I am incredibly fragile right now. Thank you for taking the time to read this.

Numpts x

Replies

  • rachmaree
    rachmaree Posts: 782 Member
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    I wish I could help, Emma :( It's really frustrating to not know what advice to give. What kind of weight gain did the nutritionist suggest? Do you still go to the group therapy sessions?
    The only advice I can give you is please don't give up! We're all here cheering you on, and I absolutely know you will get there. You are stronger than you give yourself credit for.
    Also... please please please try to not restrict after the binges. I know it's a habit, but your body is just craving to get better. If you can get your calories to a higher level consistently, I'm sure it will help. Last time I think you said the nutritionist had suggested 1400? Maybe try to stick with something even a little higher for a few days and see if it helps with the binges.

    Let me know if there is anything I can do to help.

    xxx
  • Chief_Rocka
    Chief_Rocka Posts: 4,710 Member
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    My advice is to speak with a prrofessional that deals with these issues.
  • Numptcakes
    Numptcakes Posts: 145 Member
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    Rach, dietitian had me at 1500 but I'm overshooting the mark daily. Great for body, terrible for mind.
    She's useless, quite frankly. She has this 'at arms length' approach - so much so that I've only had one appointment with her where she basically handed me a leaflet on daily carb/dairy/protein/fat exchanges. She also sat in on one of my individual therapy sessions, only opening her mouth to tell me that believing in 'extreme hunger' is just a way of not holding yourself accountable for what you do.
    I'm honestly scared to even stay at 1400 after the past few weeks. With Christmas on the way, this couldn't have come at a worse time. But thank you, again, for your continued support. Would be lost without you xxx

    I AM speaking with professionals, FireRock. The problem is getting them to talk back.
  • rachmaree
    rachmaree Posts: 782 Member
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    Can you find a new dietitian? İ hope it gets better
  • Numptcakes
    Numptcakes Posts: 145 Member
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    Anybody been through similar, or even have any ideas on how to control this? Won't be hearing back from my dietitian for a good few days and I'm struggling....
  • netite
    netite Posts: 17 Member
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    I struggle with wanting more sugar when I eat more sugar. I have found that if I eat more protein and fat, then the sugar cravings subside. I did a search for sugar cravings and found this chart. It might be helpful to you.

    http://www.naturopathyworks.com/pages/cravings.php You might have to scroll down to see the chart depending on your screen settings.

    I hope that you are able to recover the balance that you are seeking. This is difficult, but many people have succeeded. I also recommend a book that I am reading called "Eating the Moment" about being mindful of what you are doing. Your library might have a copy. It is very helpful with bite sized (pardon the pun) information and not too "out there". I take what is helpful and read around the rest.

    Sincerely,
    Annette

    Therefore be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise, making the most of your time, because the days are evil.
    Ephesians 5:15-16
  • Numptcakes
    Numptcakes Posts: 145 Member
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    Thank you, netite. That chart will definitely come in handy and I'm going to try it out.

    As of tomorrow there are no more excuses. If I don't take the first bite, I can't do any damage. Sugar HAS to be cut out as much as possible.
  • Graelwyn75
    Graelwyn75 Posts: 4,404 Member
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    It is natural you are going to be binge eating as your body is desperate to grab some of that much needed weight back, that you lost. It is called survival. I suggest you increase your daily calories, try and eat something every 3 hours or so, high in protein, and allow yourself one treat a day and no more. i don't think cutting out sugar entirely is the solution and will just backfire and result in worse binges. If you want to beat the binges and truly recover, you need to let go of the fear of gaining your weight back (since gaining the weight back is the recovery process) and focus on finding a calorie goal where you lose the desire to binge because your body has adequate carbs, fats and protein. You really do have to be 100% focussed and determined to recover for this to work, rather than fighting the weight gain.