I am so discouraged

MrsAnderson_GettingHealthy
MrsAnderson_GettingHealthy Posts: 122 Member
in Motivation and Support
I am almost 40 weeks pregnant (3 days left) which explains why I haven't started on my weight loss yet.

My entire family who knows everything about weight loss apparently, isn't ok with what I am doing afterwards. People keep telling me "you're doing the wrong thing", "you can't count calories while breastfeeding", "you're going to lose your milk supply", "you're going to fail at losing weight" etc. It is really getting me discouraged. I have never been able to keep up with a weight loss program. I lost 50 pounds on weight watchers but, life happened and I wasn't able to go to the meetings and I basically became lazy and didn't do what was expected to lose the weight. I tried just eating healthy and that didn't work.
I was feeling pretty confident about this program but, at this point... my family has me feeling really down and the only people that are there for me are my beautiful grandmother, my amazing fiance and my adorable baby girl who isn't even here yet. I just wish that I had more people to turn to when times were tough without getting an "I told you so" thrown in my face when I have a slip up, if I do.

Ugh. Someone motivate me.

Replies

  • floridagirl7264
    floridagirl7264 Posts: 318 Member
    Sounds to me like you are motivated but there are some nay sayers that could derail your progress.:grumble: What I would do (and I've done this many times before) is to listen. Then say "I'll have to look into it" or "that's a good idea". I find that it stops all of that stuff. Don't try to stand up to them, it only makes it worse.

    I forgot!!! Congratulations!!! I bet you are so excited! :flowerforyou:
  • lovechicagobears
    lovechicagobears Posts: 289 Member
    Some people know I'm losing weight (my true friends who would support me no matter what), and some don't realize it until they see me and notice the change. I kept some people out of the loop on purpose because they're such Negative Nancys and I don't need that kind of flack.

    You can add me as a friend if you want. :)
  • UmMasud
    UmMasud Posts: 18 Member
    Don't listen to the negatives; family can hold you back so much at times.

    You haven't written how overweight you are but if it's not too much I'd suggest you see how you feel after the baby comes before deciding. As a mother of six, I know the last thing I feel like doing after giving birth is pounding the treadmill. A new baby can be challenging; spend the time getting to know her and letting your body recover from the battle it will go through that is childbirth. About a week or so after you've given birth, you may feel well enough to go out for a walk. Slowly, slowly you can build it up. don't attempt anything too strenuous until at least four weeks after you've had her.

    As for dieting, you'll need nourishment for breastfeeding yes, but you can still lose weight slowly. Breastfeeding also helps with weightloss so you've go an additional advantage there.

    Most importantly, speak to your doctor. He/she will tell you the right way to go about it. Don't beat yourself up for not keeoing up with your weightloss after you got pregnant- stopping for a while was the right thing to do.
  • donnaw3kids
    donnaw3kids Posts: 130 Member
    dont be discouraged! do your research on counting and breat feedin. inform yourself so you can inform them (; BEST of luck to you and your new BABY!!
  • fwilson1031
    fwilson1031 Posts: 88
    I am not an expert by an means, but I believe you only need a few hunderd extra calories for breastfeeding. You should still be able to lose weight, just do it slowly and stay hydrated. The weight will come off. Talk to your OB too, see how many calories he/she recommedns postpartum. If you need the motivation, that's what this place is for!!! Add me, if you want, we can help eachother through this. You're one step ahead of me... I'm just now trying to lose the baby weight, two and half years later! At least you are planning on trying to lose the weight right away! Good for you! You'll do great! Eat healthy, drink plenty of water and give yourself a break for a while after the birth. Take care of yourself!

    Good luck and CONGRATULATIONS!!!
  • monty619
    monty619 Posts: 1,308 Member
    yeh im no expert but i wouldnt want my woman to cut any type of caloric intake when pregnant, or while breast feeding...ur going to be healthy anyways and the aesthetics can wait. =/
  • Gramps251
    Gramps251 Posts: 738 Member
    Don't talk to them about it. Treat it like politics and religion.
  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
    Talk to your doctor and get his/her opinion on this. If he says you are good to go, then tell your family to go suck it. And even if they are somewhat right, at least you know now then accidentally hurting yourself or your baby later on.
  • MrsAnderson_GettingHealthy
    MrsAnderson_GettingHealthy Posts: 122 Member
    All of the congratulatory replies were very appreciated. Thank you.

    I am going through the midwifery program and my midwife is helping me with my weight loss. She told me the amount of extra calories needed, how many I should have been eating before and how many I should have when I have my daughter that will help me lose weight.
    Someone had said something about me cutting my calorie intake while pregnant... I never did. I posted that I was not able to lose weight yet because of how far along I am. I never cut my calories, I have just been logging the foods that I am eating in order to get use to the program but, I'm not giving myself a restricted amount of calories.
    Also, I am told ALL THE TIME that I will want time with my daughter, I won't want to exercise and I should use the first few weeks to bond with her and work through the challenging times. Trust me, I know. I have researched everything and I think that when I am ready to lose the weight and start exercising, I will. I can eat healthy right away along with breastfeeding and I can go on walks if I am feeling up to it. I feel discouraged when people say things like that because, I am not exactly clueless. I realize that I will want time with her and I'm not going to feel like running a mile the day that I have her. I have a time frame set for when I will start my weight loss goals.
    I am about 100 pounds overweight and I felt terrible about myself even before getting pregnant. I was trying to lose weight than but, I was doing it by using vomiting as a crutch. I am proud of myself that I don't have to do that anymore and that I will be trying to do this the healthy way!

    Thanks for the helpful posts and thank you so much for those who congratulated me on this precious baby! :)
  • vabchloser
    vabchloser Posts: 223 Member
    Here's the thing, your family is not your doctor. If the doctor says eat XXX calories to breast feed, then that's what you need to do. I'm sure you can ask him if you can eat a couple hundred less calories a day and breast feed too!

    I've lost 90 lbs and my family and friends still try to tell me how/what to eat. Now I look at it and say, "I've lost 90 lbs. I think I've got it figured out, thanks."

    OH!! AND PS!! CONGRATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    And PSS - I gave birth to my daughter at 295 lbs. I started at 190 lbs. It's been a battle, but you can do it!
  • Articeluvsmemphis
    Articeluvsmemphis Posts: 1,987 Member
    Cliche alert, but it's about the quality of the people on your side, not quantity.

    It's okay to be discouraged, not okay to stop because of the discouragement.

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