Can you make me laugh??
judiiiiindisguise
Posts: 63 Member
lets laff..seriously, let's not be so serious. :sad: :bigsmile: :blushing: 
:flowerforyou:
:flowerforyou: 0
Replies
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Where do polar bears keep their money? In snow banks...lol.
Where do fish keep their money? In river banks...lol.0 -
How much does it cost for a pirate to pierce his ears? A Buccaneer!0
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You are my type of friend! Lets make this FUN!!!! Welcome to MFP!0
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gotta remember this so funny thanks!!0
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cute for my grandsons thanks!0
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Sweeeeet ....... I'm going to use those with my nephews today :happy:
- What is the world's strongest animal ? ........ A snail, he carries his house on his back !
- Why is it hard to play cards in the jungle ? ...... There are too many cheetahs !
- Why are igloos round ? ...... So polar bears can't hide in the corners !
- What happened when the cat ate a ball of wool ? ...... It had mittens !
Hope everyone has a lovely, fun day !0 -
Why did gramma put rollerskates on her rocking chair?
She wanted to rock and roll!0 -
love these can't wait to share with my 3 and 7 year old grandson crazy boys!!0
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A pirate is walking down the street with a steering wheel in his pants.
A passer by say, "Excuse me, do you know you have a steering wheel in your pants?"
The pirate replies, "ARRRGH, its drivin' me nuts."0 -
Getting into the Christmas spirit....
What do u call a deer with no eyes??? No eye deer( no idea) lol0 -
How do you cut the sea in half?
With a sea saw!0 -
What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs?Getting into the Christmas spirit....
What do u call a deer with no eyes??? No eye deer( no idea) lol
Still, no eye idea!0 -
If this video doesn't make you laugh and groove, you be dead inside:
Flynt Flossy - Fried or Fertilized
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6x-JVXkd8SQ 0 -
If this video doesn't make you laugh and groove, you be dead inside:
Flynt Flossy - Fried or Fertilizedhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6x-JVXkd8SQ
I be dead inside0 -
Where is the Easter bunny's favorite place to eat at ........IHOP
Where does Santa take his vacation.... The ho ho hotel...0 -
You'll probably have to be over 30 to get this one....
One day, a bull and his son were standing on a hill watching over the herd of cows below. Suddenly, there was an earthquake and the cows started stumbling and falling down. Meanwhile, the bull and his son remained upright. The ground finally stopped moving and the cows got back up and continued grazing when an aftershock struck. Once again, the cows stumbled and all fell to the ground, but the bull and his son remained perfectly upright. As the cows all got back to their feet, the son looked up at his father and asked, "Dad, why is it that the cows all fell over in the earthquake but we didn't?" The bull looked down at his son and replied, " Son, we bulls wobble but we don't fall down." :laugh:0 -
I may be misquoting this story, but here goes:
A family and son were having a discussion about his upcoming birthday. Since the son is close to getting his driver's license, he asked his dad for a car. The dad thinks it over for a a moment and says, "Son, if you keep your room clean, get some better grades in school and finally cut your hair, we'll get you a car." The son is really excited and starts working on the list. He cleans up his room and keeps it that way. He studies really hard and gets A's on his exams. The day before the son's birthday, his father walks into the family room and sees the son watching tv. The son looks up and says, "hey, I did what you asked. My grades are up and my room is clean." The dad shakes his head and says, "yes, but you never cut your hair." The son, thinking he is all smart, replies, "I was considering that, but Jesus had long hair and was revered by his friends." The dad laughs and says, "Jesus also walked everywhere."0 -
Another favorite....
Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him (Oh, man, this is so bad, it's good) a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.0 -
What would you call a dog with no legs?
Nothing, He would't come anyways !
Every night his owner took him out for a drag0 -
A communist couple where watching the oncoming winter clouds and debating what weather they will bring.
"Looks like we're in for snow" she said.
"Nope" he replied. "Going to rain."
"Snow" she said. But he insisted it was going to rain. Back & forth, back & forth, Rain. Snow. Rain. Snow.
As the firs drops of rain began to fall she looked at him and admitted. "Looks like you were right."
"Of course," he said. "Rudolph the Red knows rain, Dear."0 -
These friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise funds. Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, a rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but they would not. He went back and begged the friars to close. They ignored him. So, the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious thug in town to "persuade" them to close. Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he'd be back if they didn't close up shop. Terrified, they did so, thereby proving that Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.0
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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead0
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How can you tell if a woman is having a bad day?
Her tampon is behind her ear and she can't find her cigarette.0 -
A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. 'But why?" they asked, as they moved off. "Because", he said, "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."0
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How do you put a giraffe in the fridge? Open the door and shove him in.
How do you fit a rhino in the fridge? Open the door, take the giraffe out and shove him in.
When the lion king is having a celebration, what animal doesn't show up? The rhino - he is in the fridge.
How do you cross aligator infested waters? Just walk across - the aligators are at the lions celebration.0 -
What do you do with an elephant with three balls?
Walk him and pitch to the rhino.0 -
well if I sit on a bowl of feathers and mind my *kitten* cheeks from itching
then maybe my fingernails wouldnt be too long!! oooooohhhhhhhh!
doesnt make sense but atleast we can read it for show lol
^ nevermind that one lol0 -
when four of Santa's elves got sick, the trainee elves did not produce toys as fast as the regular ones, and Santa began began to feel the pre christmas pressure. then mrs. claus told santa her mother was coming to visit, which stressed santa even more. when he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two others had jumped the fence and were out, heaven knows where. then he began to load the sleigh, one of the floorboards cracked, the toy bag fell to the ground and all the toys were scatterered. Frustrated santa went in the house for a cup of apple cider and a shot of rum. when he went to the cupboard, he discovered the elves had drank all the cider and hidden the liquor. in his frustration, he accidentally dropped the cider jug, and it broke into hundreds of little pieces all over the kitchen floor. he went to get the broom and found the mice had eaten all the straw off the end of the broom. just then the doorbell rang, an irritated santa marched to the door, yanked it open, and there stood a little angel with a great big christmas tree. the angel said very cheerfully, 'Merry Christmas, santa isn't this a lovely day? i have a beautiful tree for you. where would you like me to stick it?" And so began the tradition of the little angel on top of the christmas tree.0
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A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, “This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you.” The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, “Which do you want, son?” The boy takes the quarters and leaves. “What did I tell you?” said the barber. “That kid never learns!” Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. “Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?” The boy licked his cone and replied, “Because the day I take the dollar, the game is over!”0
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