eating at the in-laws (gross).. what would you do?

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mjoslin1990
mjoslin1990 Posts: 142 Member
in Chit-Chat
So here's el deali-o my in-laws seem like clean people, until you walk into their house. It's not like hoarders gone mad or anything, the floor is clutter free.

The problem is the kitchen table has junk all over it! The house smells like bug bombs (due to the German roaches they are trying to kill off with little success). The kitchen plumbing doesn't work (and hasnt for 7+yrs) and it's just piled with nasty dishes. (they eat out every night so those dishes have been dirty for quite some time).

Anyways the house grosses me out being there. My mother in law took it upon herself to decide for everyone that we are going over there for Christmas eve "dinner". She's making chili. Honestly I'm a little irritated that she just assumed I wanna be at her house after I get off work. My family was planning on us going my moms since she lives the farthest (my in-laws live 3 houses down from us)

So the question is would you eat her food? I don't want to be rude, but I'm not sure I'm going to have an appetite once I step into the house. Seeing the roaches alone grosses me out. I know she's got to really scrub those pans to even use them, and I don't think shes going to be bleaching them like I would.

Lately it's also been said that I'm mean to my in-laws. Honestly I'm not, they just talk ABOUT me nonstop so I choose to not see them unless I have to, which is hard since they live 3 houses down. I don't want to be rude by turning down the food, but I don't want to get a bowl and waste it by not eating it. What would you do?
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Replies

  • harvo
    harvo Posts: 4,676 Member
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    Talk about how full you are from the pitch-in luncheon and snacks at work....
  • Absonthebrain
    Absonthebrain Posts: 587 Member
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    I would get a bowl and play around in it, but not eat it, maybe even pretend to eat it. Not getting a bowl will start drama, trust me.
  • onefitsurvivor
    onefitsurvivor Posts: 108 Member
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    Take along a side dish, like a salad, and only eat the salad. No one will notice and they'll appreciate spending the evening with you.
  • neverstray
    neverstray Posts: 3,845 Member
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    No. I would not eat. I like using the idea that you hoarded food at work and you're full.
  • katcunock
    katcunock Posts: 664 Member
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    i had the same issue with my fella when we first got together. he lived far away, so i only saw him at weekends. he's also a widower, so until a couple of years previously, his wife had taken care of the housework.

    i tried the whole tactful thing, like offering to help with the cooking so i could clean too and know what my food had touched, and at one point i even blitzed the kitchen every weekend. However i was so annoyed when i'd come back the next weekend and it'd be a tip again - he even had slugs coming up the drain!

    in the end, i told him i wouldn't be cleaning his house again til i lived with him. a week after that, he asked if i'd make him dinner for when he got in, and i did, serving him chilli in a collander with a ladle. i told him they were the only clean things i could find in his kitchen, and i wouldn't be eating anything from it again - i ordered take out for 2 weeks to prove my point, and he eventually got his act together.

    ultimatley tho, i was only able to do this because our relationship is secure, and i knew he cared about me being happy. if you don't have that with the in-laws, the tactful approach, or throwing a sickie might be better ;)
  • FitBeto
    FitBeto Posts: 2,121 Member
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    Just get drunk or a little toasted before going. Get munchies and be in a good mood so you don't worry about little things. Everyone wins, you're happy, in laws happy, everybody happy!
  • Derpes
    Derpes Posts: 2,033 Member
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    So here's el deali-o my in-laws seem like clean people, until you walk into their house. It's not like hoarders gone mad or anything, the floor is clutter free.

    The problem is the kitchen table has junk all over it! The house smells like bug bombs (due to the German roaches they are trying to kill off with little success). The kitchen plumbing doesn't work (and hasnt for 7+yrs) and it's just piled with nasty dishes. (they eat out every night so those dishes have been dirty for quite some time).

    Anyways the house grosses me out being there. My mother in law took it upon herself to decide for everyone that we are going over there for Christmas eve "dinner". She's making chili. Honestly I'm a little irritated that she just assumed I wanna be at her house after I get off work. My family was planning on us going my moms since she lives the farthest (my in-laws live 3 houses down from us)

    So the question is would you eat her food? I don't want to be rude, but I'm not sure I'm going to have an appetite once I step into the house. Seeing the roaches alone grosses me out. I know she's got to really scrub those pans to even use them, and I don't think shes going to be bleaching them like I would.

    Lately it's also been said that I'm mean to my in-laws. Honestly I'm not, they just talk ABOUT me nonstop so I choose to not see them unless I have to, which is hard since they live 3 houses down. I don't want to be rude by turning down the food, but I don't want to get a bowl and waste it by not eating it. What would you do?


    Wow. I just lost my appetite from reading this.
  • elenathegreat
    elenathegreat Posts: 3,988 Member
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    Fake the flu, and stay home!
  • roundtherink
    roundtherink Posts: 61
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    I like the idea someone above had of bringing along a salad, and just eating that. Tell them you're really trying to eat healthy, and saving your extra calories for Christmas Day.
    I get the cleanliness thing though. People who don't live in FL, don't get our 'issues' with roaches. I'm OCD about cleaning and pest control, and am lucky not to have them in my house. I think if I saw one I might set the house on fire to kill it. LOL
  • TazzytheMotivator
    TazzytheMotivator Posts: 646 Member
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    Eat before you go. Pretend you are eating what is cooked, then say that you are really committed to losing weight. So you must be choosy as to what you eating.

    exercise.png
  • AliciaBeth78
    AliciaBeth78 Posts: 437 Member
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    Come down with a 3 hour flu?
  • redraidergirl2009
    redraidergirl2009 Posts: 2,560 Member
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    I would refuse to go. That's just nasty. If it's dirty and there's bugs, there is no way in hell I'd go in there, much less eat in that filth. You can get sick. Don't let them make you out to be the bad person, you're not the one living in squaller expecting everyone to be okay with it.
  • kr1stadee
    kr1stadee Posts: 1,774 Member
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    Fake the flu, and stay home!

    this!!! Say you've got the stomach flu and can't keep anything down. To risk infecting anyone else, you're being kind and staying home. Tell DH to bring a bowl home (which you will forget in the fridge for a week, then go for it and say "aaww shoot, I forgot about the chili, can't eat it now, it's bad!!")
    If DH will be upset that you're faking, then take a glass of water to the bathroom, shut the door, make a "sick" sound, and dump water in the toilet.. see! you ARE sick...
    (umm.. I didn't do this to get out of school, I SWEAR!!)
  • iAMsmiling
    iAMsmiling Posts: 2,394 Member
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    Eat.
    Smile.
    Shut up.
  • charl2712
    charl2712 Posts: 38 Member
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    Oh no, far enough keep everywhere else dirty in the house, but my belief is the kitchen should be clean at all times. Your preparing food in there that's going to enter your body. I would just make an excuse saying I had a really big lunch and don't feel hungry, but I certainly would do everything to avoid eating anything there!!! x
  • dsjohndrow
    dsjohndrow Posts: 1,820 Member
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    Just get drunk or a little toasted before going. Get munchies and be in a good mood so you don't worry about little things. Everyone wins, you're happy, in laws happy, everybody happy!

    Show up stinking drink with a couple of bottles of wine. They will join you, or ask you to leave.
  • bethvandenberg
    bethvandenberg Posts: 1,496 Member
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    grossness.....

    Ok that said....Looks like you're stuck going right? Any way out of it?

    I like the eating before hand and "picking at a bowl" throughout the dinner hour.

    I can't stand when my in-laws talk about me and I live 1900 miles away. But here's the thing....you've got to suck it up, plaster on a smile and go over and be all Merry Christmas. :))))))))))))

    It's Christmas and it's your man's parents. My in-laws are boarder line hoarders but their plumbing works :) Their kitchen is clean so I can't complain there. But dang the feeling when I'm in that house just over whelms me. I just want to throw stuff away. It's claustraphopic. UGhhhhh

    Pull on your big girl panties, head on over, take a bag to scoop it into so it looks like you ate. . and then all day tomorrow spend it with your family and relax :)

    Best of luck.
  • bbgughj
    bbgughj Posts: 219 Member
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    Divorce ! :laugh:
  • natesangel
    natesangel Posts: 210 Member
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    tell them the truth, you were planning on going to your moms first so go there, tell them you'll catch up on boxing day. at the least it gives you another day or so to figure out a plan!
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
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    Pretend you have a bad case of diarrhea.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l-4WbjV1Jmo

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