eating at the in-laws (gross).. what would you do?
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^^this^^Talk about how full you are from the pitch-in luncheon and snacks at work....0 -
I wouldn't eat anything there. Don't even go if you can avoid it. And I'd ask your husband to back you up. They should know they're unsanitary and filthy. And if you have kids, don't let them touch the stuff, either.0
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I agree.....nibble on crackers or some thingI would get a bowl and play around in it, but not eat it, maybe even pretend to eat it. Not getting a bowl will start drama, trust me.0 -
Eat.
Smile.
Shut up.
This. We've all eaten a little crap to make others happy.0 -
- he even had slugs coming up the drain!
That'd be the end for me. That's freaking disgusting!!! How can he not know his kitchen is THAT nasty?!0 -
Take along a side dish, like a salad, and only eat the salad. No one will notice and they'll appreciate spending the evening with you.
This sounds like a good idea. Take over a salad and tell them that you wanted to be part of things by pitching in. If anyone says anything about not eating the chili, you can claim that you are saving your calories for the Christmas Day meal and trying not to let all of your hard work that you've been doing go by the wayside during the holidays.0 -
i would say ive had a bad stomach during the day so its easy to just pick at food or not touch it at all0
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Come down with the flu today!!0
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I would not go.First of all I am super picky about what I eat and how people prepare it and I HATE BUGS. There is no such thing as one roach. You could easily take some home with you as a gift. I've offended people sometimes by rinses of glasses after they give them to me, but I do it at my own house so I don't care. I guess you could just make a dish and have your husband take it over there with your regards. Tell them you had some bad food at work and aren't feeling to good.0
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So here's el deali-o my in-laws seem like clean people, until you walk into their house. It's not like hoarders gone mad or anything, the floor is clutter free.
The problem is the kitchen table has junk all over it! The house smells like bug bombs (due to the German roaches they are trying to kill off with little success). The kitchen plumbing doesn't work (and hasnt for 7+yrs) and it's just piled with nasty dishes. (they eat out every night so those dishes have been dirty for quite some time).
Anyways the house grosses me out being there. My mother in law took it upon herself to decide for everyone that we are going over there for Christmas eve "dinner". She's making chili. Honestly I'm a little irritated that she just assumed I wanna be at her house after I get off work. My family was planning on us going my moms since she lives the farthest (my in-laws live 3 houses down from us)
So the question is would you eat her food? I don't want to be rude, but I'm not sure I'm going to have an appetite once I step into the house. Seeing the roaches alone grosses me out. I know she's got to really scrub those pans to even use them, and I don't think shes going to be bleaching them like I would.
Lately it's also been said that I'm mean to my in-laws. Honestly I'm not, they just talk ABOUT me nonstop so I choose to not see them unless I have to, which is hard since they live 3 houses down. I don't want to be rude by turning down the food, but I don't want to get a bowl and waste it by not eating it. What would you do?
I would tell them how I feel. If this is how you feel, what is the point of telling us? Have a polite conversation with them instead.0 -
Take along a side dish, like a salad, and only eat the salad. No one will notice and they'll appreciate spending the evening with you.
Classy response. This is a much better gift to hubby than anything you can buy. Peace and Goodwill & all of that BS. .0 -
Eat.
Smile.
Shut up.
/thread
:drinker:0 -
Eat there and you will get a bad case of diarrhea0 -
I would not go. Sounds disgusting! Move far away so you're no longer 3 houses down from them.0
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If it was me in this situation, I would help her clean up the kitchen. I'm just the giving type. Maybe if she sees you doing this and cleaning up the kitchen then that will kind of tell her in a nice way that the kitchen is dirty and maybe she will learn to have the kitchen cleaned up next time. When ever I go to my in laws, I always offer to help prepare food, set the table and clean up after dinner, even though their kitchens are already clean and dirty dish free. Its just a respectful thing to ask if they need any help! Maybe offering to help will make the relationship better between you and your in laws.
Good luck and try to have a wonderful and blessed Christmas!!0 -
I would have told my husband no from the beginning. I would not eat in a house like that. Offer her to cook at your house.0
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So here's el deali-o my in-laws seem like clean people, until you walk into their house. It's not like hoarders gone mad or anything, the floor is clutter free.
The problem is the kitchen table has junk all over it! The house smells like bug bombs (due to the German roaches they are trying to kill off with little success). The kitchen plumbing doesn't work (and hasnt for 7+yrs) and it's just piled with nasty dishes. (they eat out every night so those dishes have been dirty for quite some time).
Anyways the house grosses me out being there. My mother in law took it upon herself to decide for everyone that we are going over there for Christmas eve "dinner". She's making chili. Honestly I'm a little irritated that she just assumed I wanna be at her house after I get off work. My family was planning on us going my moms since she lives the farthest (my in-laws live 3 houses down from us)
So the question is would you eat her food? I don't want to be rude, but I'm not sure I'm going to have an appetite once I step into the house. Seeing the roaches alone grosses me out. I know she's got to really scrub those pans to even use them, and I don't think shes going to be bleaching them like I would.
Lately it's also been said that I'm mean to my in-laws. Honestly I'm not, they just talk ABOUT me nonstop so I choose to not see them unless I have to, which is hard since they live 3 houses down. I don't want to be rude by turning down the food, but I don't want to get a bowl and waste it by not eating it. What would you do?
me personally i would not eat there. almost made me sick thinking about it. i dnt understand how ppl can live like that....i really like the idea of bringing your own salad or totally fake being sick or something. i honestly wouldnt give a flying raccoon if they think im mean or rude or whatever. id let them know thats not sanitary and they need to repain that stuff or move cause thats just nasty. plus id defianatly say something about having plans to go to ur moms and maybe they could come to ur house for diner? they could cook the chilie there?0 -
eat! roaches are full of protein!!! almost 100% protein!0
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Tell them you woke up with terrible diarrhea shooting out like water the more graphic the better from some bad food your family made (in-laws love that gives them a sense of superiority), and you will try to eat that delicious chili (weird thing for XMAS, but WTE) but dont know how long it will stay inside you. Grab a small bowl and pick. Remember to spend some time in the bathroom.0
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I'm with the bring a salad group. I would not even bother with picking at a bowl of the chili. I would say that I'm sorry, but I'm not allowed to eat beans on my diet. (Much love to the Atkins people for that one!) Why waste it, and why bother to even pretend or even try one bite. Ick Pooey!
Good luck and Merry Christmas!0 -
I have a similar problem with both of the inlaws (they are divorced and remarried so double trouble) Their homes are not dirty but their cooking always makes all of us sick. I simply will not go to the dads house because his wife is extremely rude to me and our children so hubby goes alone. Kids are old enough to decide for themselves and they absolutely will not go to his house because of her. I do however eat at the mother in laws. While her cooking almost always makes us sick we do eat it. I suspect its the water but who knows. She's at least pleasant and we adore her husband so its always a nice relaxing non stress visit. You have to weigh out the good with the bad and decide is it worth it? Personally I would not go to someones house if I knew they had a roach problem and had piles of dirty dishes in the sink and no working water to wash them. Thats a breeding ground for those roaches. You can bring those critters home with you in your purse, coats etc. If you do go shake out everything first chance you get before you even get in your car. yuck!!0
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I would go, but not eat. Take a salad, dressing , paper bowls & plastic forks, canned drink & use your healthy eating plan as a reason to not eat the chili. Leave everything you take so as not to bring bugs back. Next time beat them to the invitation & take them out to dinner or to your house.0
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lucky me im vegitarian, helps me out ALOT is situations like these.
I do feel your pain. many years ago i had inlaws that were just dirty. they had everyone over for the holidays and just served old/ pretty near rotten food to all their guests. it was out of this world. good luck. and dont go there hungry.0 -
Well friend, welcome to the Unfortunate Daughters-in-law club! :noway: My in-laws tried to run me off in the beginning, but I am too stubborn for that. Now they pretend to love me, but only call me when they need me. Also, they can never just be happy for me, they always have to out do anything that I or my husband does or accomplishes in life. Plus, I am a little OCD and they have 13 small weenie dogs that urinate and deficate all over their house. :sick: I try to be good about not being mean about/to them, but even my husband can barely stand them or their filfthy habits. (we keep holding future grandchildren over their heads by telling them that they better get rid of some dogs and clean up because there is no where for a child to play, but to no avail.) So here is what I do when I have to eat their unhealthy food in their unclean home:
1) never remove my shoes
2) hold my nose until my senses can get acclimated
3) hover when using the restroom
and most importantly
4) wash my plate, fork, and glass before using it.
Good luck!! And hopefully feel better knowing you are not alone in this situation!
Merry Chrismas!0 -
Was just thinking that now you know what to get them for Christmas... a few hours of cleaning service. Either offer to clean for them as a part of their Christmas present or pay in advance for some service to come in and clean. I remember when I was sick and in bed for 18 months my house work got a bit behind. Laundry, dishes a little piled up, vacuuming needed to be done. House wasn't disgusting but a things got backed up. I was so grateful when my mother came over one day to help me out. I could barely stand up so I sat in a chair and folded the laundry as my mom brought it to me. She did a load of dishes for me and cooked dinner for the kids. That was the first home cooked meal we had in a year and a half. Sometimes its the little things like a helping hand that really lift a persons spirits more than any wrapped present could.
You could also get your husband to go over and fix their sink or hire a plumber for them?0 -
Was just thinking that now you know what to get them for Christmas... a few hours of cleaning service. Either offer to clean for them as a part of their Christmas present or pay in advance for some service to come in and clean. I remember when I was sick and in bed for 18 months my house work got a bit behind. Laundry, dishes a little piled up, vacuuming needed to be done. House wasn't disgusting but a things got backed up. I was so grateful when my mother came over one day to help me out. I could barely stand up so I sat in a chair and folded the laundry as my mom brought it to me. She did a load of dishes for me and cooked dinner for the kids. That was the first home cooked meal we had in a year and a half. Sometimes its the little things like a helping hand that really lift a persons spirits more than any wrapped present could.
You could also get your husband to go over and fix their sink or hire a plumber for them?
This is definitely a nice idea.
I think if it was me I would just be honest with them b/c I don't think I could ever bring myself to even set foot in the house let alone eat anything that came out of a roach infested kitchen. If they get mad at you fine that's their problem at least you were honest and not lying and sneaking around... (but this is just me lol, not saying it's something a lot of other people would want to do, talking to in-laws and trying to keep harmony with your husband and them is hard enough without trying to alienate people...)0 -
Tell them that you have other plans - and go to the other in-laws.0
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Wow so many responses! Thank you all!
Some asked why I changed my plans from my moms to their house, I DIDN'T, My husband did. That's a whole other thread. And there's no getting out of it.
As for the salad thing, that's a great idea! I might do that instead.
I think I'm opting for the "I'm not hungry/big lunch" They know I work 12hr shifts and I eat lunch at 3:30ish. I'm working today, so its convincing enough (my lunch is my dinner usually)
I've decided I'm going to ask my husband to make sure our house is clean and see if they wanna cook the chili at our house. We can do the whole shin-ding there. I'd be better
If they decline then I have 2 other back up plans thanks to you all 
I'd love to get out of this, but I have a 2yr old and they have gifts for him and such. Plus I didn't cancel on MY mom to sit at home pretending I'm sick, I'm going to SOMEONES house tonight lol.
The other comments about getting husband to fix sink, or getting an exterminator. Been there tried that, we offered to pay, they just wouldn't do it. I dont know why. And as far as the sink, I love my husband but a monkey could do it easier then he could lol0 -
Pretend you're sick0
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I liked the 'bring a side dish' idea that a couple of people mentioned. Then you can be sure what you eat is clean / healthy. I have OCD as well (and worked in the quality assurance of a food manufacturer) so I have a hard time eating outside my own home. This way you can still spend time with the spouses family (and prevent WWIII).
Also, I usually buy a Rubbermaid container for those kinds of occasions so that if I leave it behind that I'm only out the $4 I spent on it. Then you don't have to worry about the condition of your good dishes.
Good luck! 0
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