Sticks & Stones... just a vent.

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SinIsIn
SinIsIn Posts: 1,865 Member
in Motivation and Support
Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me.... who the heck made that saying up?!?
I've been a total slacker with logging on here and entering my food.. especially in the weekends. But I've been going to the gym at least 5 days out of the week doing cardio and a class that is similar to Body Pump. Today I woke up at 5 am and went and 45 minutes of cardio before having to come in to work. I was feeling good about myself. Then in walks a sort of regular customer of ours.. a man about 55 years old or so.. very nice man... always says hello and makes small talk with me. Well he asks me when I'm due. My jaw dropped. I was devistated and it took everything I had in me not to cry and yell at him that I wasn't pregnant. I've heard stories of people mistakenly asking a woman if she's pregnant and then being totally embarrassed about it after. But I had never been the lady they were talking about. Here I was all proud that the only day I missed out in going to the gym was Sunday because it was closed for Easter. And all my good vibes came crashing down with words from a man who's opinion should not matter... but his words still hurt.

Yeah... so that's my vent. Thanks for reading. :)

Replies

  • JJRunning
    JJRunning Posts: 146
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    Don't let him get you down!! Keep up your good work.... Also, no one should EVER say that to someone unless the woman has told you she's preggers!!!!!! How rude:angry:
  • SinIsIn
    SinIsIn Posts: 1,865 Member
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    Don't let him get you down!! Keep up your good work.... Also, no one should EVER say that to someone unless the woman has told you she's preggers!!!!!! How rude:angry:

    If anything his comment has made me want to workout harder. Stupid old guy! :grumble:
  • denisemac
    denisemac Posts: 5
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    Just what century does that man live in? Are you kidding me! Totally rude! I know it s@cks and we are doing it for ourselves, no one else, but it does hurt. Let it go and laugh about it...it's the only way. Keep up the good work. Your workout schedule puts mine to shame! I'm impressed and glad for you (and the rest of us) that you are taking your health so seriously!:flowerforyou:
  • CherryBomb13
    CherryBomb13 Posts: 24
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    Awe man, i'm sorry. Just keep your head up..( i know easier said than done!)
  • SinIsIn
    SinIsIn Posts: 1,865 Member
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    Just what century does that man live in? Are you kidding me! Totally rude! I know it s@cks and we are doing it for ourselves, no one else, but it does hurt. Let it go and laugh about it...it's the only way. Keep up the good work. Your workout schedule puts mine to shame! I'm impressed and glad for you (and the rest of us) that you are taking your health so seriously!:flowerforyou:

    I work with my dad, and after he asked when i was due. He says he can't believe that that is my father. That we look like brother and sister. So my dad says jokingly.. is it because I look young.. or are you trying to say that she looks old.
    This dude had foot in mouth syndrome bad today. jebuz! LOL
  • SinIsIn
    SinIsIn Posts: 1,865 Member
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    Awe man, i'm sorry. Just keep your head up..( i know easier said than done!)
    Thanks! :smile:
  • cbnorris
    cbnorris Posts: 204 Member
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    same thing happened to me about 3 weeks ago. I was visiting a new gym as sort of a trail membership. The first night I went there was a table in the lobby that was being manned by a girl I went to high school with. So I ask what it's for and she says after hours. I'm thinking after care, as in signing up your kids, so I say "oh I don;t have any children: and she replies "no it's with the Chember of Commerce. Fill this out and you might win a 6 month membership." So as I'm filling it out she goes "so, when are you due?" and I literally freeze and start make this strange gutteral noise because I cannot believe she just asked me that and I'm running through my head what I had said earlier, hoping maybe she misunderstood me. So while I'm making this strange noise she's like "uhh, why don't you know?" or something along those lines. So I tell her "Umm, yea, I'm not pregnant" and walk away. I had to stop myself from saying something like "not all of us stayed skinny after high school *****" or "Do you realize I'm at the GYM?!" I was mortified, but I imagine she was as well....
  • SinIsIn
    SinIsIn Posts: 1,865 Member
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    same thing happened to me about 3 weeks ago. I was visiting a new gym as sort of a trail membership. The first night I went there was a table in the lobby that was being manned by a girl I went to high school with. So I ask what it's for and she says after hours. I'm thinking after care, as in signing up your kids, so I say "oh I don;t have any children: and she replies "no it's with the Chember of Commerce. Fill this out and you might win a 6 month membership." So as I'm filling it out she goes "so, when are you due?" and I literally freeze and start make this strange gutteral noise because I cannot believe she just asked me that and I'm running through my head what I had said earlier, hoping maybe she misunderstood me. So while I'm making this strange noise she's like "uhh, why don't you know?" or something along those lines. So I tell her "Umm, yea, I'm not pregnant" and walk away. I had to stop myself from saying something like "not all of us stayed skinny after high school *****" or "Do you realize I'm at the GYM?!" I was mortified, but I imagine she was as well....

    OMG that's terrible! I hope she felt like an @ss!

    I never EVER ask the 'when are you due' question to anyone that isn't a close family friend.. or family...for the sole purpose of not wanting to hurt someone's feelings if they are not. I also don't want to creep a complete stranger out if they are pregnant.... like I don't want her to think.. "why does she want to know when I'm due.. is she going to steal my baby?"
    you know? LOL
  • confuseacat
    confuseacat Posts: 137 Member
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    I had a 6 year old ask me at a birthday party once after looking at my flabby tummy, "lady are you having a baby?" . Errrrr. NOPE! is all I said. Don't let someones comment get you down. You said he seemed nice before so surely he didn't mean to be impolite. People just don't think before they put their foot in their mouths sometimes. I hope you let him know that , no you weren't pregnant, so he will hopefully learn a lesson.
  • Annr
    Annr Posts: 2,765 Member
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    I had the same thing happen to me once when I was in the apartment managers office and her little girl kept asking,"um when are you....(then the mom/manager would shh her)...and she would ask again..."um when are you gonna have a ...(mom shhhh'es her again) ..Finally I said, "What do you wish to ask me hunny?' She said, "When are you gonna have a baby?" I paused, then said simply, "Im not going to have a baby sweetie, Im just a large lady". Then I looked at the slim manager, smiling. People that are bigger need to stand up and train these kids to not look at us any different:-) The mom/manager wasn't helping by shhh'ing her and not letting her ask her question:-) There shouldn't be catagories like infants, toddlers, teenagers, adults...then fat people. It drives me nuts.... Annr
  • cbnorris
    cbnorris Posts: 204 Member
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    So, my ex (from over a year ago) texted my best friend today asking if I was pregnant. However, I think that it has more to the do with the fact that I saw his mom while I was shopping in the baby department than the fact that I have gained weight since weve split. Shesh, can't someone shop for a baby shower present?
  • SinIsIn
    SinIsIn Posts: 1,865 Member
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    So, my ex (from over a year ago) texted my best friend today asking if I was pregnant. However, I think that it has more to the do with the fact that I saw his mom while I was shopping in the baby department than the fact that I have gained weight since weve split. Shesh, can't someone shop for a baby shower present?

    LOL! I know right!? jeez.
  • jennylynn84
    jennylynn84 Posts: 659
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    Oh, I had that happen to me AND a friend of mine (separately of course). I cannot STAND it. I was probably about the size I am now when he asked. And in my opinion I, in no way, look pregnant. Personally I think that it was mostly because I was wearing and empire waist shirt. i was at work and I had to be polite because he was a customer (even though I felt like punching him in the teeth!). He apologized a lot at least. I hope he learned!

    I will never buy one of those shirts ever again. I"m looking for cruise summer dresses and it's aggravating that they are ALL empire waist. I don't want to have someone ruin my vacation like that.

    Because of this I NEVER ask anyone when they are due unless they are an acquaintance I already KNOW is pregnant.
  • questionablemethods
    questionablemethods Posts: 2,174 Member
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    Oh boo! I'm sorry.

    I have a blanket policy to never, ever mention someone's pregnancy (or apparent pregnancy) unless they bring it up or I have other outside confirmation (mutual friend, the father, something) that this person is indeed pregnant!

    (As a side note, I also never ask recently married women when they are planning on having kids. I also think that is rude. First, because what if they are trying and can't get pregnant? And second, why is there this expectation that they are going to have them at ALL? But this is off topic.)
  • jennylynn84
    jennylynn84 Posts: 659
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    (As a side note, I also never ask recently married women when they are planning on having kids. I also think that is rude. First, because what if they are trying and can't get pregnant? And second, why is there this expectation that they are going to have them at ALL? But this is off topic.)

    THANK YOU. This is all I got asked in the months after my husband and I got married. "When are you going to have a baby?" Then when I tried to explain that we don't want kids they actually ARGUED with me!

    I'm glad someone out there knows its not appropriate to demand children from you just because you're a newlywed.

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