Support from your family

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  • JoniBologna
    JoniBologna Posts: 653 Member
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    My family has been extremely supportive. However, they certainly do not keep junk food away from me. It is up to me to be strong and smart about situations with junk food. Honestly though, the hardest is the relationship with your significant other. My last boyfriend was not on board with getting healthy. When I finally did, it was a big determining factor in the end of our relationship. My new boyfriend is extremely active. He used to be much heavier as well, so he gets it. We work out together 75% of the time. We support each others fitness goals. We also both eat to be healthy. Generally, I have found it much more helpful to have someone who is empathetic to my situation and on the same page.
    My advice to you: hang in there. Most of my family now eats healthier because they have been inspired by my transformation. Keep reaching for your goal, and I'm sure he will cave and follow your lead.
  • AwesomeSquirrel
    AwesomeSquirrel Posts: 632 Member
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    I just spent two weeks with my parents and they are very supportive, though possibly I have different expectations from you. I will preface this by saying that my family doesn't eat much junk food but we cook with cream and butter and have a lot of desserts and sweets. My parents work out a little bit (Mum does group classes at the gym and Dad does gentle gym practice) and are in their mid-60s.

    I don't expect them to purge their fridge and pantry for my stay - I'm a grown up capable of my own decisions. In fact I bring them some chocolate and biscuits from abroad that I know they will enjoy.

    I do expect to be allowed to give input on our main meal (lunch) and I offer to cook some of my food. I expect them t be supportive in trying some new foods which they are. For other meals I expect to be allowed to make my own choices within reason. Eg. I have porridge for breakfast when they have sandwiches or toast, and I might have scrambled eggs and ham for dinner when they have ham sandwiches.

    I don't expect them to give up eating dessert (we always have dessert after lunch and often a little something with our evening coffee). I do expect to be asked before being dished up for and for my "no thanks" to be respected. I still stay at the table and socialise with my hot drink while they eat - I don't mind. They won't have something I really like unless I also have dessert so Mum saves that for a day when I have allowed for it in my calories.

    I do expect them to be positive in relation to exercise. They kindly agreed to drive me to a nice trail for running multiple times during my stay and took the opportunity to take a short walk themselves. I really appreciated that.

    I always make sure that there is a pitcher of water on the table for a meal drink.
  • dorothytd
    dorothytd Posts: 1,138 Member
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    One of the ways we avoided some of this without making a big deal of it was to start preparing more family meals. And by "we," I mean "me." The challenge for me was to feed them something tasty that wasn't a calorie buster. Love a challenge!! But that was a number of years ago and the family has come such a long way! My husband now helps with the cooking sometimes and is motivated to do more when we love his creations. And since he has learned a lot of his cooking from me - also uses healthier methods. He struggles with his weight, too. I so agree with all of those who emphasize that this is your journey. It stinks to watch/smell someone else eat yummy stuff when you're restricted, but it is worth it. Good luck getting to a healthier you!!!
  • 110839
    110839 Posts: 9
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    :blushing: Having gained another stone (14 lbs)!!!!!!! I have today decided to have a serious crack at losing 21 lbs by Easter - or as near as I can reasonably manage. It has been a very bad couple of years with family illness and loss but we have to go on, so this seems a positive way to move forward. My daughter also has a (lesser)weight issue and is encouraging - she introduced me to the fitness pal site a couple of years ago. I will also get one or two minor mobility issues sorted to facilitate more exercise. Exercise alone often feels pointless if it hasn't a focus and I am not one for workouts or gyms, so I hope to get a dog in the spring which will make me walk more. I will also be VERY careful in using loads of left-over Christmas food as occasional treats - now mostly in the freezer to stop me grazing!
  • MooMyuu
    MooMyuu Posts: 38 Member
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    My dad sees me losing weight and is afraid that I'm going to become anorexic (my uncle passed away this year from his battle with anorexia so my family is a little high strung and nervous when someone says they want to lose weight).

    My mom is supportive and glad I'm doing it.
    My boyfriend is my biggest support.

    Honestly, dating my ex was a pain when I switched pollo-vegetarian. I dropped red meat and my ex kept eating it. Thankfully, my new boyfriend is also pollo-vegetarian. He's also a crazy health nut and a nutritionist by hobby (he's korean too and his dad is a doctor of oriental medicine). So as far as temptation, there isn't any.

    He is so supportive of me. He removes temptation often by saying all the health risks I pose to myself eating this stuff.

    I'm probably going to step on toes here, but it's not a thing of removing temptation... I think people should stop buying junk anyway. Just because your significant other is slim doesn't mean they're healthy. In fitness there is a thing called "Skinny Fat." and these are people who are very slim with low muscle mass. They are at the same risks as obese people.

    EVERYONE should make healthier lifestyle changes and choices, regardless of whether they want to lose weight or not.
    We are what we eat and our body is only as efficient as the fuel we feed it.
  • torrini
    torrini Posts: 78 Member
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    My family's very supportive but my mum wants me to come over for dinner so often that it's getting kind of problematic. The food she makes is generally pretty healthy (lots of veggies, low fat etc) but her portions are out of control so I always end up eating too much. During school time I try to visit them only once a week so I don't constantly over eat.
  • 110839
    110839 Posts: 9
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    :flowerforyou: I suspect that, underneath, your mother is envious of the way you look and may not realise how hurtful she is. When I was working I had issues with a fat grandmother who insisted that her 4 y.o. granddaughter was anorexic, because in the honest and tactless way that small children can be, the granddaughter had announced during one battle over food that "I don't want to be fat like you". Mother was sensible, but Grandma was likely to encourage anorexia in the child - who by the way was a perfect weight for her height and age. If your weight is truly healthy as you say, I suggest that if you possible can, try not to react to your mother's barbed comments, and any similar from the rest of the family. As an adult you are responsible to yourself. The comments will lessen eventually if you don't rise to them - easier said than done!
  • alexbusnello
    alexbusnello Posts: 1,010 Member
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    My mum and brother are supportive and my dad isn't supportive at all.

    The house is full of chocolate, pringles, cakes, just everything I struggle to resist! Even the supportive members of my family still buy this stuff and it tempts me so much! x

    There is always junk in my house, too.... it's very annoying. : ( I wish they would stop.

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