Professional secrets
Having worked in a few fields and having a large number of social friends who work odd jobs and share their secrets I figured I'd be a snitch and share some
Comcast
You can call them once a few months and say that you're having a hard time financially etc and that you're looking for some help or you will be forced to shut down (don't say you will switch to AT&T or other competition for better rates. We don't give a crap about it anymore). Be nice. Simple things such as asking "Hey man, hows your day going? Hope not a lot of d***s bothering you today" will make them instantly like you and wanna make them help you. They have to deal with sooo many A-holes that just a little bit of politeness goes a long way.
You can ask for some discount which they will gladly give you (usually like $15 per month) if you're nice and express your financial hardship. You can also ask for free premium services. They usually have HBO or starz or something on a promotion for free or dirt cheap that they will make it free anyways for you. It'll be usually for 6 months. They can even put you into the system as a "new" customer even if you're been with them for years and you will get the new customer prices which are like 50% cheaper. But for this you need to know the person rather well so talk to the comcast agents that come to home.
Starbucks and similar coffee chains
About 1/4th of their customers ask for special milk (like soy and crap). Most of the employees might just be feeling lazy and give you whatever is close by anyways (2% regular or whole milk).
Also, the managers make mistake in orders all the time and order the wrong milk or something in larger quantity. So if they ordered whole milk and its about to go bad, the employees will just use that whole milk regardless of what you order.
Most coffee shop employees HATE hipsters. They go out of their way to make the order wrong
convenience store
The independent owned store owners usually don't accept many coupons because its a hassle for them but they can. So if you know the owner well, he can hook you up.
Don't smoke but get coupons? Talk to the owner or an employee and see if he'll do a trade. I would just bring in like $200 worth of coupons I get from Marlboro, camel etc to my boss and he'll give me the cash. He had some very trusted customers who he'll sell stuff like milk or chips or something as a trade. So if a customer brings in $50 worth of cigerrette coupons, he'll just sell them $25 worth of groceries in exchange.
Teachers Assistant
We can make your life in college heaven. Seriously. We can give you hints about what topics will be covered in exams, which teachers are better (in terms of teaching while still being relaxed and fun). Which are better blow-off classes or easy A's. Which assignments to get etc.
Heck we even have old notes that never got used to make into papers that we can re-use without plagiarizing. BTW, NEVER plagiarize... professors will know instantly since there are databases they check.
So, what're your professional secrets?
Comcast
You can call them once a few months and say that you're having a hard time financially etc and that you're looking for some help or you will be forced to shut down (don't say you will switch to AT&T or other competition for better rates. We don't give a crap about it anymore). Be nice. Simple things such as asking "Hey man, hows your day going? Hope not a lot of d***s bothering you today" will make them instantly like you and wanna make them help you. They have to deal with sooo many A-holes that just a little bit of politeness goes a long way.
You can ask for some discount which they will gladly give you (usually like $15 per month) if you're nice and express your financial hardship. You can also ask for free premium services. They usually have HBO or starz or something on a promotion for free or dirt cheap that they will make it free anyways for you. It'll be usually for 6 months. They can even put you into the system as a "new" customer even if you're been with them for years and you will get the new customer prices which are like 50% cheaper. But for this you need to know the person rather well so talk to the comcast agents that come to home.
Starbucks and similar coffee chains
About 1/4th of their customers ask for special milk (like soy and crap). Most of the employees might just be feeling lazy and give you whatever is close by anyways (2% regular or whole milk).
Also, the managers make mistake in orders all the time and order the wrong milk or something in larger quantity. So if they ordered whole milk and its about to go bad, the employees will just use that whole milk regardless of what you order.
Most coffee shop employees HATE hipsters. They go out of their way to make the order wrong
convenience store
The independent owned store owners usually don't accept many coupons because its a hassle for them but they can. So if you know the owner well, he can hook you up.
Don't smoke but get coupons? Talk to the owner or an employee and see if he'll do a trade. I would just bring in like $200 worth of coupons I get from Marlboro, camel etc to my boss and he'll give me the cash. He had some very trusted customers who he'll sell stuff like milk or chips or something as a trade. So if a customer brings in $50 worth of cigerrette coupons, he'll just sell them $25 worth of groceries in exchange.
Teachers Assistant
We can make your life in college heaven. Seriously. We can give you hints about what topics will be covered in exams, which teachers are better (in terms of teaching while still being relaxed and fun). Which are better blow-off classes or easy A's. Which assignments to get etc.
Heck we even have old notes that never got used to make into papers that we can re-use without plagiarizing. BTW, NEVER plagiarize... professors will know instantly since there are databases they check.
So, what're your professional secrets?
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Replies
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Banking.
When I was a teller, my pet peeve was when people would send in a check without a deposit slip or any indication as to what they wanted done with it. And then the customer would get irritated when we had to go back and ask if they wanted it cashed, deposited, etc.
Fill out a form, show a proper form of ID and you can even let us know how you'd like your cash back (certain denominations, etc). And if you don't know how to fill out the form, please, step up to the counter and we'd be glad to help you. We're not mind readers, and hey...just because I ask to see a form of ID isn't to harass you, it's to PROTECT you and your accounts with us. Be glad I care.
I currently underwrite commercial loans, so my focus has changed, but I remember those days as a teller as though they were yesterday.0 -
Restaurant Server - I learned after many years in college serving people to ALWAYS be nice to your server no matter what - I saw what went on in the kitchen0
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School Admissions Office- watch what you put online. We can easily look you up and find things you've posted.0
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IT professionals
Most don't know jack. Seriously. I used to charge $400 per hour with 4 hours minimum and I would often times just google things when I get to the job0 -
More IT
Porn + Work computer = NO It's especially bad when you play it for a whole meeting of executives. They tend to look down on that. (Yep, it happened at a previous job and the guy was walked out immediately).
We will also find and delete your music/movie collections.0 -
IT professionals
Most don't know jack. Seriously. I used to charge $400 per hour with 4 hours minimum and I would often times just google things when I get to the job
Hey I am an IT Professional.. but yes this is true the thinking is if you can pass a certification test, somehow your all knowledgeable and get jobs.. So some IT people have jobs that they have no idea how to do..
IT Tips
- What is on your work computer, isn't yours!!! Don't Download Torrents, update your resume, search for inappropriate things, put your personal credit card numbers on it, Send personal emails/IMS.. IT people can read all of this stuff in most larger businesses and in most companies (even small ones) if you are on the internet, the IT person can go on your computer and look at your files without you even knowing it.. So ya.. Don't be stupid.. AND THE INTERNET IS NEVER DOWN!
Customer Service Tips
-I worked Retail customer service for a long time when in school.. be polite, do your best to put stuff back in the box if returning, you are not entitled to anything if you are without a receipt or its been a certain time period since you bought it. Nothing pissed me off more than someone bringing something in to return in a plastic bag, with no receipt, telling me they want cash.. plus they would just toss it at the counter.. not hand it, not slide it, toss it.. If you do this and the person says no to returning, or something else.. and you ask for a manager, the first thing I used to say is "This guy is a a**hole" to the manager.. and they would normally back you... Be nice people!
Also from the first post about Comcast, you can do this with Time Warner cable, or DirecTV (other companies as well), just call them, get a retention person (cancellations department) and say you are thinking of cancelling cause its expensive, they will give you a discount if your nice, polite, and understanding.. if not.. wait a few days and call back.0 -
it doesn;t mater where you are shopping or what you are purchasing, NEVER pay full price. I always negotiate a lower cost or get a free be. even at the grocery store.0
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I hate missing a payment and with direct bill pay at my bank I hardly ever miss a payment anymore. Once in a while I buy something online and mix up a credit card that leads to a missed payment. You can call any credit card company and they will take the late fee off like it never happened if you haven’t been late in the last 2 years. They key is you have to call and ask them to take it off.0
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it doesn;t mater where you are shopping or what you are purchasing, NEVER pay full price. I always negotiate a lower cost or get a free be. even at the grocery store.
I think I was in line behind you before
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i worked as a cashier for a couple years in high school.
at Harris Teeter, when they say "security check aisles A - F" it's total bull****. they don't check security, they just say it to deter theft.
when you self check out, you can input the codes for cheaper veggies and fruits. for example if i get apples which are 1.29 a lb i'll input the on sale code for apples at .99 a lb and save some money.
also, if you're on your goddamn bluetooth and can't spare five minutes to check out, i will definitely accidentally ring up something twice, or put in the wrong code to charge you more to waste your time having to come back (if they even notice).0 -
When dining out and wishing the menu had healthier options, engage your server as your ally. Admit that you don't know how it would be rung up, but what you'd really love is for *this* chicken to be added to *that* salad, with *these* toppings, etc. It gives the server a chance to be creative, gives the kitchen something new and interesting to build, and gives you exactly what you want without you coming across like a picky brat.
Example: At Buffalo Wild Wings, I now get a blackened chicken salad spun up with Carribean Jerk sauce with bleu cheese on the side. It's like their Jerk Chicken sandwich, but without the bun, and with extra veggies. At Smashburger, they'll give me uncooked "veggie frites" - that is, they don't cook them at all, and instead give me a side of fresh carrot sticks and green beans to munch on in place of regular fries.
You might get a few confused looks at first, but if you're a regular somewhere, soon they'll learn your "specialties" and it'll be easy to re-order them.
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I'm a funeral director.....you don't want to know....
But seriously...most of us really do want to help you out and understand you are going through an awful time, so if there is something special or personalized that you would like with a loved oe's services...just ask us!! We will go out of our way to make it happen if it is at all possible. But PLEASE....don't bring food and drinks into the funeral home.0 -
i worked as a cashier for a couple years in high school.
at Harris Teeter, when they say "security check aisles A - F" it's total bull****. they don't check security, they just say it to deter theft.
when you self check out, you can input the codes for cheaper veggies and fruits. for example if i get apples which are 1.29 a lb i'll input the on sale code for apples at .99 a lb and save some money.
also, if you're on your goddamn bluetooth and can't spare five minutes to check out, i will definitely accidentally ring up something twice, or put in the wrong code to charge you more to waste your time having to come back (if they even notice).
so you steal when you self check and you steal from customers. phhh0 -
HDMI cables.
My company is one of the largest electronic connection companies in the world. We manufacture many connections in everything you use. That USB connection from your I-phone to the computer, yep, we invented that.
These words that are used all the time - USB, HDMI....etc are standards. They are not companies. Anyone can make an HDMI cable as long as it meets the interface and testing standards. That said, the standards for an HDMI cable are very high. If you are making one, you have to show that you pass all of the tests and meet the interface requirements to use the term HDMI. You will see some companies try and upsell HDMI cables with extra gold plating and high insulation wiring for less EM interference. BS. While you can get better performance from those, it won't matter to Joe Blow and his wife Jane. No one can tell the difference between a $5 HDMI cable and a $150 HDMI cable. The difference in the visual performance of the signal is not detectable by the human eye. If anyone tells you differently, they are lying.
Buy the $5 HDMI cable.0 -
so you steal when you self check and you steal from customers. phhh
And obviously missed the posts here when some of us said people can find everything you've posted on the internet!0 -
Credit card companies.
ALWAYS ask for the late fee to be waived. Use the word "waived." And be nice about it. Just call in and say, "Hi, can you please waive the interest charge on my account?"
Also, after you get the "annual fee" a lot of credit cards charge, call and ask that to be waived as well.
ANOTHER BIG ONE (even though you are flat out lying here) is if there is a very large charge on your credit card that you don't want to pay for right when the bill comes in, call and "dispute" the charge. Say you are not aware of this purchase and you want them to investigate it. They will take about 4-6 weeks to investigate the charge on the card during which time you are NOT LIABLE to pay it. Then they'll come back and say, "oh, it was a purchase from Best Buy two blocks from where you live, are you sure you didn't buy this?" And you say, "Oh! I just didn't recognize the vendor, oops!" and then pay it. You weren't charged interest on it during that time and you got an extra month to save the money to pay it. I worked for a sole proprieter that tended to get these things a lot so I had to call in for him.0 -
Bump I love this.
Administrative assistant: Always be nice to this person! They know EVERYTHING and will most likely be there long after you are gone.0 -
Buying glasses? The package deals for $100 include a pre-made and coated lens, that has anti-glare, anti-scratch, but it is inferior to the lenses that go into brand name frames. Antiscratch does NOT mean they'll bounce back in perfect condition after you 1. Drop them on gravel, 2. Use a wool sweater to clean them, 3. let your dog or child bite them. 4. They fly out of your chest pocket and bounce against your house while you're on a trampoline. Antiscratch means that if you moisten the lenses and clean them with a cotton or microfibre cloth, they won't show wear and tear as nearly as quickly as a non coated plastic lens.
Glass doesn't scratch nearly as easily as a coated plastic lens, but it shatters. Don't drop them, or ask for them in a pair of safety glasses, fool. Also if you spend time around bb guns, get the dang plastic. A teenage boy walked in with damaged glasses but a perfectly healthy eye after a stray bb hit his plastic lens. Glass would have shattered, ruined his eye and cut him all over his face. Speaking of eye injuries, if it ever happens, your body will usually react by projectile vomiting. Take a bucket with you to the ER.
The non-package frames are generally marked up 300% or so. This covers materials, shipping, employee wages and a tidy profit. Be nice to the optometric assistant helping you and ask if they're willing to knock it down 10% or throw in a small extra. Don't demand it. And if you have a crazy high or complicated prescription, the one hour service will never apply to you as they custom make your lens at factory, due to it being a rare prescription, and then ship it. They are not a stocked lens. And the people who sell you the glasses don't have any sway in changing that, as the factory is an independent company, themselves.
WalMart or other glasses stores inside big box stores are considered package glasses quality. They may have brand name frames, but the lenses are generally inferior. Ask what brand lens they use, or if they're pre-coated. Nikon or Essilor are the higher end lens brands, with Nikon doing their own research and creating new lens technology, and other brands following suit. Some independent optometry offices have gotten their own brand of lens that are similar quality to Nikon and Essilor.
If anyone gets migraines/headaches while driving, it is worthwhile to get polarized prescription sunglasses to keep your eyes from fatiguing.0 -
Bump, and I have to think of something to contribute0
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i worked as a cashier for a couple years in high school.
at Harris Teeter, when they say "security check aisles A - F" it's total bull****. they don't check security, they just say it to deter theft.
when you self check out, you can input the codes for cheaper veggies and fruits. for example if i get apples which are 1.29 a lb i'll input the on sale code for apples at .99 a lb and save some money.
also, if you're on your goddamn bluetooth and can't spare five minutes to check out, i will definitely accidentally ring up something twice, or put in the wrong code to charge you more to waste your time having to come back (if they even notice).
so you steal when you self check and you steal from customers. phhh
was thinking the same thing!!0 -
Make sure to review your natural gas prices regularly. You can often get really good fixed pricing and if you want to change, most companies will pay your "penalties" up to a certain amount.0
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Academy Sports and Outdoors prices clearance items through system wide discounts and some stores may not have updated sale tags on such items.
ALWAYS check the price on something you saw on clearance in another store or have seen on clearance before. They typically just lower the price the longer an item has been on clearance.
Combine this with lazy/incompetent employees and you can find a lot of nice stuff for CHEAP at certain times of the year.
I bought a $150 spinning rod for a penny last year for example...0 -
Dental Appointments
I worked as a dental hygienist for years and this seems like common sense, but please, brush and floss your teeth before your appointment, regardless of your usual habits. We don't want to look at your lunch or smell the cigarette you had right before entering the office. We're quite understanding for a whole host of dental issues, but if you can't be bothered to at least brush before an appointment, it's seen as disrespectful to us, and tells us you probably don't care about your teeth. I've had people come in and say they came straight from work, and asked for a toothbrush to use before we saw them and even that is appreciated.
Also, if you come across a financial hardship or lose your dental insurance, talk to your office instead of just disappearing for a few years. If you're a regular at a clinic, most are pretty understanding and will try to work out a payment plan for you and may try to give you a discount depending on the clinic and their relationship with you. If you've never been to an office before and you walk in the door asking about a payment plan and discounts, you're not likely to get one but loyalty wins big points with many dental clinics.
Edited to add: And if you're really hard-up, don't have a regular office and are in need of some serious dental services, find a dental school. They ALWAYS need patients - both for dentistry and dental hygiene (regular cleanings). The appointments take longer, but if anything they're much more thorough, you're checked by instructors to ensure they're done to perfection and they're generally given at a discounted rate (I think my school charged 50% of regular fees).0 -
*Customer Service for clothing stores*
if you wat to have them hold an ite (usually a 24 hr hold) make friends with the service desk people. Talk to tem as equalsif not more, and explain whats going on "I'm waiting for my check and it sucks, if i need to can I call you tomorow to hold it another dayor two" Id always help people out if thy arent A-Holes to me
when returning an item, always be nice to them, i used to help my customers who were nice to me by giving them the best possibl price instead of *the lowest price in the ast month"
If an item doesnt have a tag, ask them to help you out. usually if people ae genuenly nice to me i'd gve them a decent price instead a hefty price i'd gve a-holes0 -
Heating and plumbing service:
When your heat/AC goes out or you have a plumbing problem do not call the company up and yell at the person you are speaking to. They are your lifeline and are the difference between you getting service that same day or 1 week from now. Most companies consider an emergency to be someone without heat when it is cold outside, non operating toilet when you have only one bathroom, and no water coming into the house. Of course if you live in the south no AC during the hot months would probably be an emergency but in the northeast it does not because so many people do not even have AC. So do not call up crying because your kitchen faucet drips and you want service within the hour. Do not call up and threaten or curse because you aren't satisfied with the answer of same day service. Please keep in mind that if you aren't an emergency you most likely will not get same day service because your husband tried to fix the bathroom faucet and he made it worse. Do not call at 330pm expecting service that is not in overtime. Again politeness goes a long way if a company is not busy and you are nice you most likely will get service immediately. Being nice and you may be surprised what you get. I know if we are busy and someone is nice to me i have been known to move them to the top of the list regardless when they call, but the people who call with an attitude or especially cursing automatically will get pushed. Also keep in mind the smaller the company you call because they have the cheapest service call so is everyone else in your town. Companies that have one or two trucks on the road do not have a ton of appt open so you should go to the more expensive company because they usually have more employees and can help immediately regardless of what your concern is. Also most companies cannot give you an exact appt yes its annoying but true. They try to fit as many people in to a day that they can and you never know what you will encounter on the job before yours. Someone may say they have a furnace that won't start and when you get there you find out their furnace is from 1940 and not as easy to fix because finding parts are near impossible and newer guys are not taught how to work on the older furnaces when they go to school and most home owners do not like to hear that they need to get a new furnace. In fact many will just kick you out when they hear that.0 -
To all current or inspiring college students and parents of college students:
Every student should know that they need to be kind and respectful to their teaching assistants and go to their teaching assistants' office hours. They most likely do most of the grading!0 -
Dental Appointments
I worked as a dental hygienist for years and this seems like common sense, but please, brush and floss your teeth before your appointment, regardless of your usual habits. We don't want to look at your lunch or smell the cigarette you had right before entering the office. We're quite understanding for a whole host of dental issues, but if you can't be bothered to at least brush before an appointment, it's seen as disrespectful to us, and tells us you probably don't care about your teeth. I've had people come in and say they came straight from work, and asked for a toothbrush to use before we saw them and even that is appreciated.
I dont wash my car before I take it to the car wash0 -
I think we could sum this up with, just be nice to everyone.0
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I owned and operated a restaurant with my parents for several years. (before becoming a full time mommy and wife) A few things to note in the restaurant (and service) industry:
1) while the mantra is "the customer is always right"; the reality is, you'll get much farther using honey than vinegar. Be nice to your server, bartender, etc… and you will likely get whatever it is you are requesting. If you're being rude or obnoxious, the staff is less likely to attend to your needs as promptly, even if you DO get whatever specific thing you asked for. If you're being a jerk, your server will think they aren't getting a good tip, so why bother giving you stellar service? You'll end up waiting longer for the 2nd round of drinks, that dessert, etc…
2) A server's job is "service" oriented- to attend to and anticipate your needs; they cannot control the quality of what comes out of the kitchen, how it is prepared or how your tastebuds define your meal. You do not tip on the quality of the food, you tip on service.
3) If you do enounter a problem, even if the server has rectified the issue, please let management know. We can't fix a problem we don't know about! The vast majority of managers and operations truly do care what their patrons think, and if you had a bad experience, we want to know, so we can address the situation and prevent it from happening. Conversely, if you've had a positive experience, we want to know that too!!!
Edit: I must add that my aforementioned list is FOH heavy; I have kitchen training and experience, but my expertise is the Dining Room and customer service. Having said that:
A good kitchen will do it's best to accomodate your special requests, particularly with respect to allergies and dietary needs. In fact, today many menus are designed with these types of requests in mind. However, if you are simply a picky, difficult person, please realize that while your server and kitchen staff with do their best to accomodate you, when it is extremely busy, you put extra pressure on your server (they take the brunt of the Chef's ire) as well as potentially throw a monkey-wrench in the flow of the line. Being difficult for the sake of being difficult just makes everyone's job harder. (Believe me, there are people who do this!)0 -
I sell autoparts...
Your price depends on how annoying you are. Also, we have phones ringing off the hook while you are telling your life story. While we are listening to you babble on, we just lost 500 bucks on the other line, so don't think of us as rude for rushing you out the door, but you are costing me money by hanging around, bugging the *kitten* out of me. so when you have what you need, hit the bricks!
Also, don't ask for a garage discount, if you don't have a garage. We don't like scam artists, and you will be treated accordingly.
Same as everywhere else goes though, politeness, understanding you're not the only customer I am helping at the moment, etc all go a long way in how you are priced and serviced!!0
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