How do you say 'No"

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  • sunsnstatheart
    sunsnstatheart Posts: 2,544 Member
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    Does anyone have a problem with saying no to alcohol? I'm not talking AA limits, but what do you do when you lead a very social life and everyone around you is having a beer or a glass of wine - or my personal favourite....bubbles! How far down do you have to dig to find the self control to say "no thanks, I'll have a glass of water!!!!!"
    I hate to say this...it's never received well....:grumble:

    If you're anything like me, you don't say no.
    And that means severing those connections and seeking out new, like-minded people.
    Good Luck...

    ^I mostly agree with this. If its work, drink tonic or soda water with a lime and don't tell anyone. If its friends and they won't take "no thank you" for an answer then you need new friends.
  • seena511
    seena511 Posts: 685 Member
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    "Oh, I'm doing this healthy detox vegan yoga spiritual boot camp, do you want to hear about it?" (of course, this could easily repel people from you all night)

    this lol
  • alpine1994
    alpine1994 Posts: 1,915 Member
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    Find some friends that like to do things that don't center around drinking

    I would say this, but they're not easy to find, especially when in your 20s! Unfortunately my ideas of going to the art museum or glow bowling were not as popular as going to bars. You could offer to be the DD so you won't be tempted to drink since your friends are counting on you to get home safely. Eventually it starts to not be such a big deal to just order a club soda with lime and nobody will care or give you a hard time about it.
  • windyleal
    windyleal Posts: 20
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    I am not a drinker so I have no problem turning down alcohol. When people offer something I do not eat I like to just say "thank you for offering but this doesn't fit into my plan and I've worked to hard to take steps backward now."
  • T1mH
    T1mH Posts: 568 Member
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    Remove yourself from the situation. That's easy for me to say because hanging out in a bar was never my idea of fun.
  • valleemic
    valleemic Posts: 103 Member
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    We seem to have quite a few social events too and yes, it is hard. I try to save up some calories to fit a drink or two in and then alternate the alcoholic beverages with something that looks like a drink like Perrier and diet 7 up with lemon.
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
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    It depends on how often you're going out. If we're talking nightly, or even a few times a week, then yes, you're going to have to come up with an alternative. I'd rather use my calories for real food on a regular basis than have a drink. Just get seltzer water or a diet soda.

    If you're going out once per week, a drink or two shouldn't be a big deal, just plan your day accordingly to allow for the extra calories by keeping your eating light and/or getting some exercise in. Skip the cocktail drinks though because the sour mix and juices most of those have can really amp up the calorie count. Instead have a wine spritzer or your favorite clear liquor (gin, rum, vodka) mixed with a diet soda. Either of those choices will be about 100 calories.
  • Baileytoo
    Baileytoo Posts: 5
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    I usually go out on either Friday night or Saturday night and try to limit the calories during the day because I know that I am going to have a beer, that is not my favorite but a light beer, with low calories allows me to milk it. Then if I want something else I'll have it and then the next day will work off all the calories that I consumed the previous evening. Mind you that I only do this once in a while, have the extra, if you get stuck in the social situation like you're talking about it's just mind over matter, do what you prefer and don't feel guilty. You can always throw in some extra workouts.
  • Bobby__Clerici
    Bobby__Clerici Posts: 741 Member
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    Does anyone have a problem with saying no to alcohol? I'm not talking AA limits, but what do you do when you lead a very social life and everyone around you is having a beer or a glass of wine - or my personal favourite....bubbles! How far down do you have to dig to find the self control to say "no thanks, I'll have a glass of water!!!!!"
    I hate to say this...it's never received well....:grumble:

    If you're anything like me, you don't say no.
    And that means severing those connections and seeking out new, like-minded people.
    Good Luck...

    ^I mostly agree with this. If its work, drink tonic or soda water with a lime and don't tell anyone. If its friends and they won't take "no thank you" for an answer then you need new friends.
    My problem was never them but me.
    Sure, they'll take no for an answer, but I won't drink water if everybody else is drunk and partying.
    I had to just decide that I no longer wanted to be that guy.
    I needed new friends into fitness, health and general wellness.
    It's a personal choice each of us make.
  • quirkytizzy
    quirkytizzy Posts: 4,052 Member
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    "Oh, I'm doing this healthy detox vegan yoga spiritual boot camp, do you want to hear about it?" (of course, this could easily repel people from you all night)

    :laugh:
  • gjulie
    gjulie Posts: 391
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    I do know what you mean!My drink is one glass of wine with a meal and thats it,I have no problem saying no but I do feel people think you are a weirdo not that I care what anyone thinks anyway I do my own thing!!!
  • glovepuppet
    glovepuppet Posts: 1,710 Member
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    sponsored sobriety! go armed with a tin and earn money for a worthy cause by getting everyone who offers you a drink to donate a dollar to your worthy cause.
  • auddii
    auddii Posts: 15,357 Member
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    When I'm out with friends I drink beer, but it's ok because it's microbrew.

    Seriously though, if your drinks aren't fitting in with your calories, I find it easier to switch to something else that I don't normally drink (namely diet soda). Calorie free, still tastes good, and only a little bad.
  • L1zzydarcy
    L1zzydarcy Posts: 15 Member
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    I run into this a lot with one particular friend group. I do a couple of things. If I want to and if I have the calories for it I have one or two or whatever fits into those limits. I have accepted that this means sometimes I leave half a glass of wine or beer on the table because I only had 100 calories left for the evening for example. If people ask me about it, I am pretty up front that it's not worth the calories to me. (I try not to be a bore and harp on that, but if they ask I'll answer.)

    If people keep pressuring me, I say no. And if they don't accept it, I will call them on their peer-pressuring BS. I'm way too old for that nonsense. And if they don't accept it, I leave.

    Also, you might find that you want to leave earlier if you're not drinking. People are annoying when they're drinking, and you notice it a lot more when you're not drinking.

    Good luck!
  • sasheywa
    sasheywa Posts: 1
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    Wine: The Most Diet-Friendly Choice
    If you’re going to drink, wine is the most calorie-friendly selection with a typical 20 calories per ounce. Each 5-ounce glass would then be 100 calories with no cholesterol, sodium or fat. This is true for both red and white wine, from merlot to chardonnay. Sherry, a sweet, fortified wine runs a bit higher with 32 calories per ounce but it is usually served in smaller portions as an after-dinner drink.

    Here is the nutritional information for some popular wines per ounce:


    Wine Calories Carbs Per 5-oz Serving
    Chardonnay 20 0.4 g 100 calories, 2 g carbs
    Pinot Grigio 20 0.4 g 100 calories, 2 g carbs
    Zinfandel® White Wine 20 0.4 g 100 calories, 2 g carbs
    Cabernet Sauvignon 20 0.8 g 100 calories, 4 g carbs
    Merlot Red Wine 20 0.8 g 100 calories, 4 g carbs

    Hard Liquor: Easy on Your Diet
    Hard liquor is higher in calories per ounce than wine, and is often mixed with soda, which increases the calorie count. If you’re going to drink liquor, use calorie-free mixers like diet soda or diet tonic water. One shot glass or mixed drink will contain about 1.5 ounces of hard liquor.

    Here is the nutritional information for some favorites, based on one ounce:


    Hard Liquor Calories Carbs Per 1.5-oz Serving
    Vermouth 32 0.2 g 64 calories, 0.4 g carbs
    Coconut Rum 51 5.3 g 77 calories, 8 g carbs
    Beefeater® Gin 65 0 g 98 calories, 0 g carbs
    Rye Whiskey 69 0 g 104 calories, 0 g carbs
    Scotch Whiskey 69 0 g 104 calories, 0 g carbs
    White Rum 69 0 g 104 calories, 0 g carbs
    Vodka 69 0 g 104 calories, 0 g carbs
    Cognac 69 2 g 104 calories, 3 g carbs
    Tequila 69 5.3 g 104 calories, 8 g carbs
    Gilbey’s® Gin 79 0 g 119 calories, 0 g carbs

    Beer: Raise Your Glass with Care
    Beer is the next best choice for dieters with, about 150 calories per 12-ounce serving. Choosing light beers will drop your caloric intake without sacrificing much flavor, but keep in mind that it can be hard to estimate your intake when pouring from a pitcher or into an oversized beer mug.

    Here is the nutritional information for different types of beer, based on a single ounce:


    Beer Calories Carbs Per 12-oz Serving
    "Light" Beer 9 0.5 g 108 calories, 6 g carbs
    Draft Beer 12 1.1 g 144 calories, 13.2 g carbs
    Lager 14 1.1 g 168 calories, 13.2 g carbs
    Ale 18 1.1 g 216 calories, 13.2 g carbs


    I usually order the best thing for me and sip it with water, my friends usually don't keep track of what I am doing. Its hard to say "NO" good luck!
  • determined_erin
    determined_erin Posts: 571 Member
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    I am a person who finds alcohol disgusting. Because of this, some of my friends try to push me into drinking. I always say a polite no, and if they keep badgering me, I say a firm no. I had one friend who was so obsessed with pressuring me that I no longer speak to her! Even in formal situations (weddings, work parties, etc), I do not cave in. So, stick to your guns and don't allow others to force you into something.
  • nashsheri33
    nashsheri33 Posts: 225 Member
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    how about, no thanks, water sounds really good to me right now. or, no thanks, i don't want any. (what are they going to say, yes you are?)
    if you don't want to talk about it, just get a diet soda with a lime garnish and a little umbrella, so it looks like a drink, and stick with that.
  • Project_Jodie
    Project_Jodie Posts: 171
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    It's a little sneaky but I find having a soda water with lime or lemon is a good trick even in bars etc. That way if my friends ask me about why I'm not drinking I'll say oh it's got Vodka in it! hhaha Or I drive....you can't drink and drive so there is the perfect excuse to not drink! :)

    I enjoy a drink - prob why I need to lose weight but I don't need it to have a good time and Im a really social person - it's the peer pressure that get's me sometime!
  • SmartAlec03211988
    SmartAlec03211988 Posts: 1,896 Member
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    I just say no. I do not bow to social pressures.
  • RobinvdM
    RobinvdM Posts: 634 Member
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    If it's been a while since your last fun drink, then toss caution to the wind and order up something you know you will love and sip on it all night, or order a second. Who cares, it's just a few calories. If you go for a bit of a longer walk the next day, or budget around the drinks it isn't going to hurt.

    The hardest part of losing weight is accepting the consequences for the choices made; good or bad. When I go out to dinner, I
    ALWAYS order a strawberry frozen margarita because they are just this side of perfect and wind up ordering a second - hearing the KACHING noises of my calories adding up. Who cares? I just enjoy it, I don't drink every night and if it means a longer walk tomorrow- so be it, it's a lovely time of year to be out walking :)

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