I'm 50, and can't get motivated.

OK, I am back with a new name. I won't say what the old one was, not that anybody would remember my name, but they might remember my avatar. I took lots of grief for that avatar even though there was nothing exceptionally offensive with it, other than being unpleasant to look at.

OK, so here is the deal.... I am 50. Married with 2 younger kids. I work from home, but only PT. I need to lose about 100 pounds. I think that my issue is that I look at that number and it just seems insurmountable. I know, it is not, but it feels like it is when you LOVE to cook, love to eat, and hate to exercise. Actually, I like to play sports but I don't like regimented exercise.

I once lost 80 pounds and got to within 30 pounds of my goal, and I gained it all back. I look / remember how hard that actually was to do.... I was in the gym 10 hours a week. I also rode my bike 100 miles a week, and I ate proper portions. The thing is, I was 37 years old when I did that. Now, at age 50, I have had a heart attack already with bypass, and I have diabetes..... These things alone should motivate me to get in shape, but somehow, I must be an idiot, because it doesn't.

I don't have the energy I had at age 37. I am not nearly as strong.

Fast story... my 72 year old mother fell today, and couldn't get up. I could not lift her up, and had to call 911...... I felt ridiculous when i couldn't get her up. 13 years ago I would have had her up off the floor in no time flat. Today, when the police officer told me how to do it, I shook my head as though I really thought that I could lift her up when he explained the best way to do it.... but in my head I knew I probably could not do it.

I guess I am asking for some motivational miracle... I also know that THIS IS ON ME, AND ME ALONE, to make it happen, so I don't really know what I am asking for... maybe some success stories from people of my age group?

Thanks for any responses.
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Replies

  • Textmessage
    Textmessage Posts: 387 Member
    You're here, so that's a step. Motivation? Think of your mom on the floor every time you go to your favorite restaurant or you do the grocery shopping. If you want something, you'll get it done. If you don't, then nothing will happen.

    You've even been through it in the past, just do what you did then at a slower pace if you have to.
  • It seems that nothing is as easy as it was a few years ago. The metabolism slows down and other things seem to take priority, I don't think there is any great motivational aid that fits everyone, but it does sound like your mothers fall may provide some of the motivation you need. While the weight does not come off as easily as it did maybe we can learn to accept more small victories. I just joined this site last week but have found some motivation in reading the posts and listing my meals and exercise is really providing some motivation. So keep at it and maybe we can find some more motivation along the way.
  • Runs4Pasta
    Runs4Pasta Posts: 28 Member
    It's time to man up. It's only too late when you die.
  • barneygirl
    barneygirl Posts: 36 Member
    It is so hard to get back in the zone when you have lost it.
  • LouPsych
    LouPsych Posts: 30 Member
    49 years old, 100 to lose. It's about the mind set and desire. Slow and steady wins the race. I, too, have fought with my weight all my life. My changing moment was hearing my younger sister (she's 43) tell our Mom she thought she looked more like me each day to which Mom replied, "It's cause you're fat." Nice, eh? Not because she's finally found someone who respects her, or that she's content - "You're fat."

    Lots of history to go with the eating problem, but the ultimate responsibility falls on me. I'm the one that cooks and puts the food into my mouth, and who makes the decision to sit rather than get up and move.

    Have made a financial commitment on a couple of on-line sites "betting" that I will lose. Also bought two clear jars and filled one with stones for each pound I need to lose. I will take pleasure in moving a stone over to the empty jar each time I lose weight. I'm taking it one day at a time; got up this morning and reminded myself that I have been on point intake wise for three days, and I can do it yet another day. Long range? I'm going to live give myself every chance to live as long as I possibly can.
  • 1stday13
    1stday13 Posts: 433 Member
    Hey & welcome Motown13:
    My name is Lori I am 54 and need to lose at 100+ pounds. I understand everything you are saying. I would Love to have you for a friend. We can chat. I just had to do alot of soul searching, slap myself around a few times & FINALLY realized, I do not want to live the rest of my life this way. I am the only one that can change it, no one can do it for me. I am selfishly doing this for me. I have always put everyone else first . Now is my time. Like Textmessage said you have taken the 1st big step. Next thing is suit up & show up every day on here.Log in & dig in. There is a wealth of information and tons of motivation from everyone. But you have to take advantage of it. Hope to see on here regularly. I will send you a friend request, hope you will accept :flowerforyou:
  • hosegirl
    hosegirl Posts: 157
    Remember it is the baby steps. Steady wins the race. I had an auto accidnet about 4 months ago. I gained back the weight I lost. It took hard work to get there. I am finally getting back to the gym and I am not looking forward to " Where have you been?" I know there will be friends, people I know will be "Oh great to have you back. Hope everything is ok."
    You know it onyou but what about your children? DO they not deserve to have you around? If you can afford it I would get a personal trainer for about 3 months. Once you are over that hurdle it will get easier. My husband gave me a personal trainer for my BD. What a great gift. Boy did she push me. Found out some excercises literally make me sick to my stomach. No Burpies for me. But she also showed me some very simple things that I can do. You can add me as your friend if you like.
  • Dave198lbs
    Dave198lbs Posts: 8,810 Member
    It is so hard to get back in the zone when you have lost it.

    only with this attitude

    start thinking positive

    I can do it

    quit whining about the past

    fukk the past...move on take some control and be one of those people that feels good
  • KimLovesDon
    KimLovesDon Posts: 152 Member
    I'm 50 too. I also have 100+lbs to lose. I didn't gain it all in one day, and it won't go away in one day. But I can do this and so can you. Sometimes progress is measured in steps instead of miles. Just take it a day at a time. If you fall off the wagon, get up and get back on.
  • Have you considered gastric bypass surgery? With your health problems, losing weight is a matter of life and death for you, and the risks of being 100+ are far more at your age than the risks of GB surgery. My 51 yr old brother was 100 lbs overweight and died 2 years ago of liver failure due to fatty liver disease which he never knew he had. That's when fat clogs up your liver so badly that it can no longer function. He began to retain fluid, 10 days later was in a coma and 10 days after that, passed away. Good luck to you. Save yourself so your kids will have a father.
  • ladywendolyn
    ladywendolyn Posts: 45 Member
    I was a weight watchers leader for a few years and had several members who each lost 100 pounds. The common thread they shared was focus, planning and support. I noticed that they were really serious, they set up there environment at home for success. Healthy food all around, no chips lurking in the cupboards. They were all very honest and did not take it lightly... But they were all patient with the process. They planned their meals in advance and kept in touch with each other daily for accountability.
    These are all things you can do on this site... Daily accountability rocks! Taking it seriously rocks!
    And you are totally worth this journey, because your life and your contribution to the world counts...
    This is your 2013 project... And your going to do this.

    I don't speak flippantly... I had a serious car accident this last year and have had to fight my way back from a place of injury that was turning me into an old person. I am 47 years old... And yes.. It is harder... But we are wiser than we were at 35.
    Yes you can!
  • cheddle
    cheddle Posts: 102 Member
    random advice:

    if the 100 pounds seems insurmountable, just think about how you managed to put it all on, how subtle it was when it came on... you will find it will leave equally as subtle - it will take time, it will not be obvious that it is happening until one day it has just happened. keep this out of your mind :-)

    loving food and hating exercise is a given, it is how you wound up in your current state, its your habbits and wants that have made you who you are, if you want to be someone else you need to go against the grain, to do things that you do not want to do and to do the things that the people you want to be like would be doing. eventually, after enough time against the grain you will find the grain starts to shift, you start to form patterns along the path you are travelling and it will all become a habbit, just like your current ones and you will find eating healty and exercising just as easy as you currently find overeating and being sedate, the trick is to do it against your will for so long that you stop wanting for the bad things...

    age is no exception, your mind is your mind and it is what controls your body, so what if your not as strong as 20 years ago, im sure that you are currently stronger than many 30 years olds are. do not compare yourself to anything else except yourself, you are what you are trying to improve here so only measure your progress against your own results

    if you find it hard to grind out a routine, try and set targets and goals, have a score to settle and a game to win dont focus on the way you play just on winning.
  • nuemmedigg
    nuemmedigg Posts: 220 Member
    I can so relate to you. Especially after having yoyoed 10 lbs up and down and up again several times. Ultimately though, I must take off the weight if I want to be around for my kids, who I love. So, despite it being cold outside, I will go swimming at the gym now.
    The person who mentioned that you have to do things that go against your comfort is right. Wanting/needing comfort is what got me to this size.
    Good luck and feel free to add me.
  • motown13
    motown13 Posts: 688 Member
    Thanks all..... I am off to use that YMCA membership we have for the family..... that's a start, at least.
  • fdny9943
    fdny9943 Posts: 65 Member
    I'll be 50 this year. I started at 449 and I was a firefighter paramedic. How can I help others when I couldn't help myself. You just need to change one day at a time. healthy choices for food and you must, must exercise on a regular basis. There are no secret weight loss ideas. Calories out have to be more than calories in. I'm down 153 pounds so far. The secret... I ate what I wanted (controlled the portions) but I dedicated myself to exercise. I still had and still have pizza and ice cram and cookies butt now I eat 1 or 2 slices, 1 or 2 scoops and a couple cookies instead of half a pie, a quart of ice cream and a whole sleeve of cookies.

    As a medic I know you can improve your heart health, stop that diabetes and get healthier but YOU must make those decisions and the first one is to get up and move.

    Good luck and if you need support and motivation add me as a friend.
  • scorpiotwinkles
    scorpiotwinkles Posts: 215 Member
    I know where you are coming from. 12 short months ago I was thinking about using walking aids to get around due to extreme pain and overweightness (I know that's not a word, but it seems to fit LOL).

    Anyway, I got off my - crutches - and got into the gym. My ticker shows the rest.

    You are right, it won't come from us, it will come from you. Only you can want it. I wanted it for 30 years, but not bad enough. Now I have got it! and I love it! Whatever it is!!!

    Welcome back, take one step at a time and go for it! You have absolutely nothing to lose - except weight.
  • First, it's all about mindset, you have to truly want to do this. Second, is patience, it starts with the first step and though one step may seem like nothing to some, it's a huge step. It may be easier for your journey to take day by day. Years ago, I had a scare with cancer. It was then, that I realized there are things within myself that I may not have control over, but there are many that I DO have control over. It was then that I started to become more focused on my health. Something to keep in mind, everyone you see, has a struggle within.....You can do this!
  • I'm completely amazed at the people who have lost weight, especially over 100 pounds, when 20 pounds seems like it'll take forever. It wasn't till I started counting calories here that I realized what I actually put in my mouth. I've always been faithful to exercise (even though I HATE it), but I like the way I feel and HATE the wiggly/jigglies. Knowing how many calories I can eat definitely keeps me on track. I've lost it and regained it my whole life. I want the 20 pounds gone for good !
  • Can anyone tell me how to get the weight loss progress on my posts ? I've tried to copy/paste but it doesn't seem to work.
  • What keeps me motivated, even at 48, is SEX. Yes, sex. I still want to be naked and still love sex. Sooooooo, I want to be sure I look and feel good naked. I'm not ready to give that up yet and if didn't stay under a certain weight , it would be bye-bye to that. I'm not giving up something I truly enjoy, and it's much more satisfying than eating.
  • Sharita0427
    Sharita0427 Posts: 38 Member
    I'll be 30 in less than 2 weeks & can't get motivated to save my life. After I had my second child I just let myself go w/o even noticing (if that makes any sense). I just always thought I lose the weight like I did after my first child, but I was sadly mistaken. My son is now 3 & I'm at my highest weight ever. I too am looking to lose 100+ lbs.
  • Thinworks2013
    Thinworks2013 Posts: 4 Member
    While I only became a member yesterday, I have been a lifetime member with Weight Watchers having lost over 80 pounds. First and foremost, you ARE a strong person as is clearly evidenced by the fact that you even signed onto this site. So, give yourself a bit of credit and recognize that this truly can be the start of a healthy lifestyle for the rest of your life.
    I also, just in the last six months, became a cancer survivor having survived two breast surgeries and cervical spine surgery which was a two year recovery and, if the chemotherapy, complete hair loss and radiation weren't enough, I was one of those rare cancer patients who actually gained wieight - 30 pounds - as a result of the steroids that were part of my chemo infusions.
    My 55th birthday is coming up this month and I am convinced that I am a "survivor" for a reason.
    My motivation? Hey, my beautiful life is just starting! I get up every day, grab a sunrise when I can and plant one foot in front of the other. It takes a lot more than cancer to get me down, my friend! So, have a cup of coffee, walk down to the corner and let this be the first step - you have to start somewhere. Your two children deserve at least that much. My new mantra? "Nothing tastes as good as thin feels." There ya' go...
  • pawoodhull
    pawoodhull Posts: 1,759 Member
    I'm 56 and I have another 93 pounds to lose. Motivation for you? Younger kids, heart issues, diabetis, elderly parent(s). Sounds like a lot of motivation right there. Easier said than done. I wound up having bariatric surgery to get my weight off, no matter what the motivation, until my own mobility was at risk, I couldn't do it. My suggestion to you is talk to your doctor about weight loss plans. Explore the bariatric end of it if you want, but your doctor should be able to help you either way. Lots of water, lots of protein, really low on the carbs and fat and exercise, even if it's just a daily walk. Again, esier said than done. I struggle every day with the exercise end of things and on some days the eating too. You said it, it's all on you. It is for all of with or without weight loss surgery. Good luck.
  • Good words thin and best of luck to you!
  • Yargsy
    Yargsy Posts: 1
    Good on you, for trying again. You will do it and you will get motivated when the time is right. Sometimes I feel that just losing 5lbs at the beginning and feeling ever so "lighter" is motivation enough to keep going. Be proud of yourself that you are here and that you are recognizing that you need to make change. That's a good start!
    Good Luck!
  • 4twins
    4twins Posts: 14 Member
    If you want to have something you've never had, you have to do something you've never done. That phrase motivates me anyway. It is possible to lose weight in a healthy way but I find that when I focus on how unmotivated I am... the more unmotivated I become. I have to start by doing things that don't come naturally and slowly but surely it gets easier. Don't wait for a big "feeling" of motivation to come your way, just start! A year from now you will wish you started today!
  • SillyFitMe
    SillyFitMe Posts: 130 Member
    Hate to exercise? You're in luck because loosing weight is 85% what AND how much you eat. There is really no exercise required to achieve a healthy weight if you are eating well and sticking to normal size portions. Love to cook? Spice it up a little and experiment in the kitchen with some fiery new healthy recipes. You will find some you love and even start to crave after a while! Oh and a little trick - I find that over flavoring dishes automatically causes me to eat less and feel satisfied. Best of luck in recovering the strength and health you once had! So you never have to feel weak and helpless ever again.
  • needles85365
    needles85365 Posts: 491 Member
    Only you can decide if getting healthy is worth it. MFP is a great tool if you use it. I hate exercise but I do it anyways, I don't like limiting my food intake but I do it. I like the new me and do not want to go back to where I was. Took me a long time to get to this point but I want it. The question is DO YOU?
  • needles85365
    needles85365 Posts: 491 Member
    Can anyone tell me how to get the weight loss progress on my posts ? I've tried to copy/paste but it doesn't seem to work.

    Go to the apps tab
  • Pedal_Pusher
    Pedal_Pusher Posts: 1,166 Member
    sounds brutal