Worried I won't stick to this again.
Replies
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Don't focus on forever... just focus on making today good. Results don't come from the decisions you may or may not make next week, or even tomorrow, its about the decisions you make today. So for today hit your calorie goals, exercise, and don't get discouraged. You've only got to make today good. Each day is about your immediate choices, and you can't obsess about future potential decisions.
^^This^^
Plus don't hide from your mistakes. Just admit it, learn from it, and move on. Take each day one at a time. You know what to do. Part of that is being TOTALLY honest. Log EVERYTHING. Open your log to be viewed. Make lots of MFP friends who will look at your logs and give you support and feedback.0 -
It's not about sticking to it. I had to change my mindset. This isn't a diet. This isn't a fad. This is how my life is now. If I had cancer I would spend the time to get healthy (with chemo, diet change, medication). I'm obese and I am spending the time now to get healthy.
No one should be expecting perfection. No one should be expecting immediate results. "This isn't a sprint, it's a marathon" is thrown around a lot on here, and it's true. You're not changing for today. You're changing to be with us tomorrow.
(Now that my philosophical rant is over...)
Do what you can. What you feel you can do right now. Make small goals. Your BIG goal weight is 185 but your 1st goal weight can be 270. Whatever it is, we are here to help you on this journey. We're all on here for the same reason, to be healthy.
Fantastic advice!
And OP, yes, 1300 is too drastic. Unfortunately, from all the posts I've seen here on MFP, it's pretty clear that a lot of doctors don't know anything about healthy dieting, most still believe that drastic calorie restriction is needed when that's just not true at all, especially if you're active.
Something that triggered my "aha" moment was having a friend ask me something along the lines of "why didn't that last diet stick?" (can't remember the exact words, that was 4 or 5 years ago). At first I just dismissed it but it kept coming back in my head so I finally gave it some thought and realized that the common factor in my past weight loss attempts was deprivation. Like you said, I'd try avoiding foods and eating less and I'd be hungry and miserable and craving things and after a while I just gave up and said screw it, I'd rather be fat and happy.
So when I started again this time about 3 years ago, I decided there was no food that was off limits. I might not buy it and keep it in my house but if I wanted ice cream, I'd go get a cone. And if I wanted pizza, I'd find a way to make it work. It's been a bit more of a slow and steady loss since the first year passed but I'm totally fine with that. I'm still getting healthier and losing weight and that's what really counts.
Don't be in such a rush. Figure out how you could cut back on the portion sizes of the foods you love instead of cutting them out altogether. Find a leaner cut of steak like a sirloin, trim some of the excess fat off, put it in a nice marinade and it'll still be fantastic. In fact, I'm having steak for dinner tonight! Same idea for exercise - don't kill yourself in the gym doing something you think you HAVE to do but hate. Find something you enjoy so that you'll stick with it for years. Think long term as you go. Can I live without steak and potatoes? Not really but maybe I could cut my intake back to once a month instead of once a week. Things like that...
Best of luck to you!!0 -
Thank you all for your kind replies and the advice. There are many terms I'm still learning like calorie deficit. In the past my Doctor has handed me a 1300 calorie diet, so I took My fitness pal down 1700 something. I think 1300 is too drastic for right now..
You are right about that. A man should have no less than 1600 per day and a woman no less than 1200 per day. That is net after exercise too.
All of the advise given here is spot on. I'll add a new thought. For me, I realized that food was too much of a source of fulfillment and satisfaction. I would get excited about eating something and then later hate myself for it. Then the light came on......this is just like addiction. Craving, acting out, then remorse and disgust. What I've been training myself to do now is relish the feeling of fulfillment in knowing that each day, I'm living out my new lifestyle. I gotta know its not a diet but a lifestyle like many people have said here.
One last piece of advice....look for the danger signs of giving up. They are subtle.....like not wanting to weigh in cuz you know you messed up. What isn't measured can't be improved! Same thing for MFP.....if you don't log in one day, that's a red flag. Measure every day!0 -
Don't focus on forever... just focus on making today good. Results don't come from the decisions you may or may not make next week, or even tomorrow, its about the decisions you make today. So for today hit your calorie goals, exercise, and don't get discouraged. You've only got to make today good. Each day is about your immediate choices, and you can't obsess about future potential decisions.
^^This^^
Plus don't hide from your mistakes. Just admit it, learn from it, and move on. Take each day one at a time. You know what to do. Part of that is being TOTALLY honest. Log EVERYTHING. Open your log to be viewed. Make lots of MFP friends who will look at your logs and give you support and feedback.
These are both great pieces of advice. Focus on right now. It's very easy to get overwhelmed by something if you are thinking of EVERYTHING that needs to happen in order for your goals to be met (and that is true in life outside of weightloss, also) But if you focus on the one task you are doing right now, it seems much more doable. Good luck!!0 -
The only thing that worked for me was when I finally decided that I had to do 'something'.
Then I told myself that I was going to walk just 15 minutes a day. That was it, nothing more, nothing less.
After 2 weeks I noticed changes in my legs and was motivated to walk longer, faster, etc.
Then I started logging food, saw what I was really eating and changed that.
Small steps will give you amazing results. Start walking today! You are worth the effort it takes.0 -
u just get back up and keep going. the weight is NOT going to come off fast or easy for that matter. But stick with it, and it WILL come off. you will fail ALOT of times, GET BACK UP, pick up the pieces and keep moving forward.0
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RobbyCu,
You can do it man. Again don't think of it as a diet your just learning a healthier way to live. its not about the looks its about your health! Little steps man. I keep telling my self you didn't gain this weight in a year so don't plan to lose it all in a year. I was 376 a year and half ago. Got down to 273. then slacked off for too long and gained 25lbs back. I restarted again this past Saturday weighed in at 298. I got some serious work to do also! My goal is to be around 230. I have a huge frame too so 230 may be a stretch. 1st goal is to get back to my 273!! My best of advice is be prepared! make meals in advance, have good healthy snacks on hand. Eat small meals often to get that metabolism back up! Drink tons of water!! YOU GOT THIS SIR. Ps Here is a website that helped me knock off 70 lbs it has meal plans and workouts. You may have seen the guy on tv its an impressive story!
http://www.fit2fat2fit.com/
also i'm working on something called dietbet. lose 4% of your weight in 4 weeks. Bet 50$ for a share of the pot. ITS UP TO 65,000$ Some nice motivation to start!!
http://www.dietbet.com/games/47090 -
Ultimately you have to really want it to do it. You also need to realise that this is the way you need to eat for the rest of your life if you're not going to yo-yo. Obviously you'll be able to increase your cals when you get to GW, basically you can't lose the weight and then return to your old habits, it does NOT work.
MFP is such a motivating place, sometimes I'm not keen on doing a workout, I'll come on here see all the workout status's from my friends and they make me WANT to workout.0 -
Stop thinking and start doing. Make a game and have fun. You have a job to be serious with
^^^This^^^ and start small. Find things you can start putting into your diet (the noun, as in how you eat everyday) not DIET (the verb, something you'll abandon when the weight is off) that is healthier
figure out where you have empty calories in your diet and get rid of them, or limit them. for me, i try not to drink my calories, so i mostly drink water all day. i love black coffee, i drink teas with no added flavor, and i love milk. *if even i do use sugar, i use the real thing, and with creamers, i measure it out instead of just dumping it into my cup.
with fast-food and whatnot, it's healthful to start LEARNING, yes you must learn, what's in your food. so if you're concerned about health then see if any certain kinds of food trigger problems for you. if you're more concerned about calories then just look those numbers up. foods you label as "bad" can actually not be that horrible number wise even if they lack sufficient nutrients.
don't tell yourself it's impossible. this is dorky, but the word even says IM-possible!
give it time.
find ways to enjoy it, and get an accountability partner. my best friend and i enjoy discussing food, working out together, etc. someone to boost your ego from time to time, haha
and give it TIME, I said that already? yeah, give it time!
everyone overeats, i still overeat, i still binge eat, i emotional eat. i probably always will, but i don't beat myself up about it to the point it hinders me from seeing the next day as a NEW day to make better choices and continue on0 -
What's wrong with diving into a steak? Lean steaks are good diet foods because they have a lot of protein and aren't overly high in calories, but even a well marbled steak every now and then shouldn't kill your weight loss.
Don't think of your diet as soemthing that includes nothing but "diet foods". You absolutely should eat your veggies. But that should not be all you eat. Grilled or baked instead of fried. Well seasoned instead of breaded. Leaner meats. LIttle changes such as these can make huge differences in the calories of your favorite favorite foods.
Make changes you can live with for the rest of your life. A healthy diet shouldn't be something you start and finish. It should be something you can maintain long term so that you don't lose, just to gain it all back. And don't forget to treat yourself every now and then.0 -
Hi there!
I think I know how you feel. I really struggle to lose weight healthily. If you want someone who can crash diet for a month, make themselves ill from overdoing it at the gym and then get depressed, binge eat for a week and put the weight back on again, well, I'd have been your girl.
I've realised something about myself which perhaps might be true of you too - I am impulsive and compulsive, which are not a good mix for weight loss. It used to be all or nothing for me and I've worked really hard to get out of that mindset. For example, as an opposite to the not eating/overdoing it at the gym, it used to be that if there was a big bar of chocolate in the kitchen, I had to eat it all. Couldn't just leave a bit; if it was there, I had to eat it. Didn't want it, but couldn't leave it either. Sound familiar? If so, have a look at other areas of your life - for example, do you start hobbies, be obsessed for a week and then never pick up your guitar/paintbrush/knitting needles ever again?
For me, recognising that aspect of who I am has been instrumental in changing it. Now I can take it or leave it, eat healthily (in a way that I can sustain, rather than overdoing it and giving up after a little while) and leave the gym when my time is up or I've had enough (and I don't start stupid, expensive hobbies without thinking about it first!).
One last thing - a big problem I had was that if I slipped up I'd get into the 'Well, I've ruined it now, may as well eat all the things'. Say you've done well for two weeks and then you mess up and eat a load of cake, or chocolate or steak. Well, that's not great, but it's one day. You haven't ruined everything, you've just had a steak. Don't wait until next week to 'start again', get back on it right away, right after you've finished eating that naughty thing.
Hope that helps!0 -
REMEMBER THIS....worry is interest you are paying on a debt you may never owe........ take it one meal and one snack at a time. It is ok to have that steak when you really want it.....just don't have it trying to break a steak eating record at your local eatery! You can do this....all you have to do is love yourself the way you did when you logged on to this site.0
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I have a hard time sticking to it too. I have lost 50 pounds and have maintained that loss for over 3 years now but I am still overweight and can't seem to lose the rest. I do OK for a while and then end up gaining back the small losses I manage to make,
I keep telling myself that I just have to keep trying. That's all I can do. I'm not going to give up altogether.0 -
I feel compelled to not eat, I'll obsess over the diet and then burn out and dive into a steak.
A lean steak can be GREAT for losing fat. It looks like you have quite a bit to learn about the proper diet. Generally, high protein is best for body composition, and high fiber is best for your cholesterol. Your first goal should be losing weight in a SUSTAINABLE manner. no 1300 calorie diet is sustainable for a big guy like you. That's a terrible method doomed to fail.I've read it get's easier as you go but I'm not sure. I'm 272 and I have a big frame. I would like to get to 185 or 190. I think that's impossible, but I have some chronic health issues so it's for the best. How did you all stall motivated?
There are lots of ways to stay motivated. Eating a high protein diet while exercising is a great way to lose weight and it can be very fun and enjoyable. Simply find foods that you like and exercises that you like.
Also, spend a lot of time on here (or similiar forums or websites) during your free time to stay motivated. If you spend all of your free time watching TV with McDonalds advertisements being constantly flashed in your face, what do you think your mind will be craving? Whereas, if you spend your free time reading about diet and exercise, those are things you'll end up doing.0 -
again, work just under your TDEE. Your body won't struggle to hold onto fat, and you won't feel deprived if you eat foods that are healthy and satisfy you.
Do you know which foods make you feel the best? For example, for breakfast, when you eat protein- eggs, lean meats, do you feel full longer? do you feel satisfied eating a fiber filled breakfast? If you know that, it makes it so much easier to find foods you like and keep you full long enough.0 -
It's not about sticking to it. I had to change my mindset. This isn't a diet. This isn't a fad. This is how my life is now. If I had cancer I would spend the time to get healthy (with chemo, diet change, medication). I'm obese and I am spending the time now to get healthy.
No one should be expecting perfection. No one should be expecting immediate results. "This isn't a sprint, it's a marathon" is thrown around a lot on here, and it's true. You're not changing for today. You're changing to be with us tomorrow.
(Now that my philosophical rant is over...)
Do what you can. What you feel you can do right now. Make small goals. Your BIG goal weight is 185 but your 1st goal weight can be 270. Whatever it is, we are here to help you on this journey. We're all on here for the same reason, to be healthy.
To say that it's a lifestyle sound cliche, but it's the truth. You have to envision your goals. You have to grit your teeth and just change everything you do. Look at what triggers binges. Also, know that steak is not unhealthy. Eating an entire porter house with mashed potatoes, and dessert when you could have eaten a salad with a small steak and plain baked potato. The other cliche saying that "It's not easy, but so worth it" is beyond true. You can do this. Good luck on your goals.0 -
You can't enter into something w/ that negative attitude!!! Believe in yourself!0
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