Advice wanted: How do you cope with STRESS!?

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bambi5014
bambi5014 Posts: 79
in Health and Weight Loss
I desperately need some ways to cope with huge amounts of stress that keep getting thrown at me. My coping mechanism in years past has been to eat, drink or smoke. With all of that cut out, I need a new way to cope. I am a working mom with 3 school aged children. My husband is unemployed and going through a lot emotionally.

Recently I have been exercising fairly regularly, but honestly find it VERY hard to get motivated to do so when I feel so blue. Playing Just Dance on the Wii with the kids is one thing I have done that helps, and sledding when it snows. I really want to succeed with my weight-loss. What do you do when all you crave is comfort food to make you feel better?

Also, I need some more MFP friends... the more the merrier on this journey, right?! Feel free to add me.
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  • Kelley528
    Kelley528 Posts: 319 Member
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    Exercise is how used to cope with stress. Now that I am not stressed I dont have the motivation to exercise.

    Maybe try to find time for yourself away from things. Even if its just getting your nails done, sitting in a park ( when weather permits) reading a book, taking scenic walks.

    When I have the urge to eat something knowing that I am not hungry in the least, I'll make a cup of coffee or tea just to occupy myself for awhile.
  • lizlkbg
    lizlkbg Posts: 566
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    I don't know if this will work since you seem to live in a snowy climate, but WALKING is very calming to me. With my music on, hopefully. Just let my mind go blank. Also, tea. Even if you put a packet of sugar in, that is only 15 calories. Something that smells comforting - I love honey vanilla chamomile and Yogi perfect energy.

    Stretch. Also, reach out. Yesterday I put a status on facebook asking everyone to tell me one good thing, any subject. I got 50 responses that brightened my day!

    Finally, and this is a hard one, try to get enough sleep. Seems impossible at times, but so worthwhile.

    I am also a working mom of 3, just went through a period of unemployment, finances are precarious, and in the past 6 months my son was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes and my husband with lymphoma. So I TOTALLY understand your challenges.

    I'll send you a FR. Hang in there.
  • lizlkbg
    lizlkbg Posts: 566
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    AND - STAY AWAY FROM NEGATIVE PEOPLE. Sorry to yell, but it's important!!! If you feel yourself getting anxious around a certain person, ask them if you really need them in your life. If you do, try to figure out ways to counteract the drag-down effect.
  • RonnieLodge
    RonnieLodge Posts: 665 Member
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    Recently I have been exercising fairly regularly, but honestly find it VERY hard to get motivated to do so when I feel so blue. Playing Just Dance on the Wii with the kids is one thing I have done that helps, and sledding when it snows. I really want to succeed with my weight-loss. What do you do when all you crave is comfort food to make you feel better?

    I used to drink, smoke and eat.

    Recently, regular exercise to good music is my go to.
  • angdestry
    angdestry Posts: 8
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    With all of that going on, I'm super stoked for you that you aren't eating cheesecake while drinking rum and cokes inbetween drags on your cigarette! As someone that eats sugar by the pound and drinks wine like it's water when she's stressed, I totally get where you're coming from. When I was a SAHM, I had a hard time carving out me time. You need to find a way to have that time--a few hours or a few minutes--to only focus on you everyday. Working out helps me de-stress. When I don't have time for that, I take a 15 minute "me" break. Usually that means sitting down with Star magazine (of some other mag I would be MORTIFIED for anyone to actually see me buy!) and flipping through the stories. Whatever it takes to make sure I don't lose my mind is what I do! Otherwise, everyone pays for my bad attitude LOL
  • jonesin_am
    jonesin_am Posts: 404 Member
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    Exercise, exercise and more exercise! I found that running really helped me. I started off slow with the C25K program and increased my distance from there. Running is my ME time. I can clear my head and think without distractions or I can just focus on running and block everything else out.

    Also, exercise gets those endophins going so it just makes you feel better in general. I understand it's hard to get motivated but you just have to do it. And once you do you will feel great about it.
  • AlayshaJ
    AlayshaJ Posts: 703 Member
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    I dont besides lifting, im just freaking out constantly. Its terrible, really.
  • marathon64
    marathon64 Posts: 378 Member
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    I know it's tough but something high intensity that gets your heart pounding will also get your endorphins pumping and then you will feel so much better! If going out for a run is not your thing a short DVD can be great. A lot of people on here love Jillian Michael's 30 day shred. That's how I lost all my weight and I loved it because it's so short-like 22 minutes I think?
  • sphira
    sphira Posts: 132 Member
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    Try a relaxing yoga DVD or a meditation DVD. I feel stress in my shoulder and the yoga really helps to relieve the stress. Check on YouTube for yoga or meditation
  • samlankford
    samlankford Posts: 334
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    exercise... I LOVE to beat the hell out of the heavy bag to the point where my hands are swollen if I am not wearing gloves...
  • bambi5014
    bambi5014 Posts: 79
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    Thanks all. I really appreciate the ideas and will genuinely consider each one.
  • jflint86
    jflint86 Posts: 74 Member
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    Yoga and music. Lots and lots of each :)
  • Strength2Succeed
    Strength2Succeed Posts: 126 Member
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    Im so sorry to hear about whats going on! Its great that you are reaching out for suggestions and positive people to surround yourself with. Last year was an INSANE year for me health wise/personal relationships/home life/finances. What I have done as suggested above is take my dog off leash walking in trails and take in the fresh air! I LOVE IT! Its beautiful, calming and most importantly time to myself that I can think or chose not to. I read and aside from the gym I play ballhockey and soccer. When I am playing my sports thats also my time away from what is going on in my life. I am surrounded by great people and working out while im at it :) Please feel free to add me!
  • iLoveMyPitbull1225
    iLoveMyPitbull1225 Posts: 1,691 Member
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    Excersise and stretching help me a lot, but I am also the type that needs "me" time. I also NEEEEED my time with my friends. My dog brings huge amounts of joy and de-stressing to my life. Basically, find some stuff that makes you happy and make time for them, as well as making time to just be by yourself.

    P.S.- Friend request sent as well :)
  • bookwormk
    bookwormk Posts: 5
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    I found the best way for me, is to do yoga. When something is thrown at me, I just breathe. I can sit there and focus on my breathing and relax while I figure out what I can do about the situation. The breathing keeps me level headed so I don't get emotional. Once upon a time I would listen to Yogi Wade's podcasts and do that work out about 90 min. I had a kid and let everything slip, so I'm working my way back up. But when I get stressed all my muscles hurt and yoga stretches them and relaxes them so I FEEL better.

    Just my two cents on what works for me.
  • cedarghost
    cedarghost Posts: 621 Member
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    Headphones and a heavy bag in the garage.
  • cosmic0074
    cosmic0074 Posts: 91 Member
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    I'm under constant stress and it always help me to work out because feeling all GRRRRRR!! :explode: makes me have a hell of a work-out (try that with strength training or running). That and being around funny loved ones :smile: I'm sorry to hear about your husband though, I hope he can find a new job asap.
  • cebreisch
    cebreisch Posts: 1,340 Member
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    In times like this, one of my doctors said, "It's okay to take care of yourself and be selfish - it's your turn!"

    As someone else already said, limit the negativity. Avoid negative people, avoid the evening news shows, and if you're going to read the paper - focus on one section: The comics.

    Watch uplifting movies instead of "blow 'em up, blood & guts" movies.

    If there's a hobby you always wanted to take up, now's the time. Knitting, sewing, crocheting - and I'm not talking about 3 hours at a time - maybe just start at 15 minutes. There are video's on YouTube that can show you how to do it.

    I have 2 kids, and know it's hard to keep them occupied or not at each's other's throats....find activities that you can do with them....my sister once got some little wooden boxes from Michael's and some paints, and her kids LOVED painting them and making them their own. My sister-in-law has given my daughters braclet making kits, and they love that. I play UNO with them and CandyLand. My husband plays Clue with them. I took them to see Monsters Inc over the holidays.

    Even Chik-Fil-A has family night - the one we go to has it on Tuesdays, and it's "buy one get one free kids meals" - so we order 4 kids meals, and it's about $11.00 for the 4 of us to eat. On the 2nd Tuesday of the month, they have a 3 person band play kids songs, Buddy Holly songs, a little Elvis, a little Johnny Cash....etc. The kids LOVE it. - not to mention being able to play in the play area too.

    At Steak-n-Shake, kids eat free on weekends....Fazoli's has family nights too with "buy an adult entree' and get kids meals free"...

    Or even go to the mall food court - there's a mall here that has a play area for kids, and that was our typical Tuesday night festivity...there was enough variety in the food court we could be good with our choices too.

    But really - find some way to get in some "ME time"....stop by a store on the way home you've always wanted to peruse, go fill up your car and take your time, when you get home go for a walk before getting the kids (or take the kids with you if you want) - take the long way home through the woods down a few two-way streets that are less travelled...Ask your husband to take the kids somewhere to play so you can lay down for a little while and decombust...

    For what it's worth - and good luck!
  • samanthalee87
    samanthalee87 Posts: 178
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    I'll usually go for a REALLY long walk with my dog, sometimes alone or sometimes with my boyfriend if I need to talk to someone. If I'm more mad than stressed I will workout. A good sweat helps clear up negative emotions.
  • claritarejoice
    claritarejoice Posts: 461 Member
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    Hi, I sent you a friend request and message with ideas. I hope it helps :)

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