When you want to punch your friends in the face...?

jr1985
jr1985 Posts: 1,033 Member
edited January 10 in Chit-Chat
My friends... well one in particular has just been annoying the crap out of me lately!

Admittedly, she is a very pretty girl, and is GENERALLY a pretty pleasant person to be around... but it is pretty obvious that she think's she is the most beautiful person that anyone has every laid eyes on.

She just got married over the summer... Anytime I hear any of our other friends mention how excited they were to have been hit on at the gym, at the bar, etc. She ALWAYS says... "I hate that people know I'm married because now I never get hit on anymore" I totally get that married people are flattered to be hit on too... not like creepy inappropriate flirting... but ya know... everyone wants to feel hot. But we are talking EVERY time anyone mentions anything.

I just took a few trips over the past month when I asked her if she would like to come she said. "We can't afford it, besides, I wouldn't want to distract the pilot or the ship captain with my beauty and have him crash the ship like on Costa Concordia" In a very, Ok, yes, I'm kidding, but really I'm not... TELL ME I'M PRETTY tone of voice.

I know that her husband worships her and tells her hot great she looks CONSTANTLY...so it's not like she is never getting attention or anything... And I agree... She is a very attractive person... But I do just want to scream at her. YES WE ALL KNOW YOU ARE PRETTY! THE REST OF US DON'T GET HIT ON OFTEN, GIVE A DOG A BONE AND LET US ENJOY IT WHEN WE DO!

I'll bet she doesn't even realize that she makes the rest of us feel like trolls when she says stuff like that... But am I out of line to be kind of irritated by it? Would you all say anything? or just keep letting it go? Thanks for letting me vent :)
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Replies

  • wellbert
    wellbert Posts: 3,924 Member
    pics of friend before we judge.
  • futurestarz
    futurestarz Posts: 510
    you could mention something if you think it will help. I would word it something like this "when you say _____ it makes me feel _____". Be specific with your examples and be honest about how it makes you feel.

    Some people say things like that because they are insecure. Even though she may be very attractive, maybe she doesn't really believe it.
  • Stompp
    Stompp Posts: 216
    pics of friend before we judge.

    Someone had to say it :)
  • DebbieLyn63
    DebbieLyn63 Posts: 2,654 Member
    Sounds like a case of insecurity on her part. She doesn't feel like she is worth anything for any reason other than her looks and needs constant reassurance.

    Perhaps let her know that it seems like she is insecure about other areas of her life, then tell her all the reasons that you are friends with her, that doesn't have to do with her looks.
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
    pretty people can be insecure, too. If you care enough for her, try to sit down and have a heart to heart about it. Chances are, she doesn't realize she is doing it.
  • bebreli
    bebreli Posts: 227 Member
    She's so vain.. I bet she thinks this thread is about her.
  • My1985Freckles
    My1985Freckles Posts: 1,039 Member
    I would suck it up and let it go unless you really want to lose her as a friend.
  • EmilyOfTheSun
    EmilyOfTheSun Posts: 1,548 Member
    If it's messing with your friendship then you should say something. Don't call her out in front of your other friends, take her aside.
  • _the_feniks_
    _the_feniks_ Posts: 3,412 Member
    I prefer a hook to the liver over a jab to the face. Hurts more.
  • LauraMacNCheese
    LauraMacNCheese Posts: 7,173 Member
    file000.gif
  • CTCMom2009
    CTCMom2009 Posts: 263 Member
    For me personally, it sounds like she is so insecure that she is looking for any kind of positive reinforcement that she can get.

    I know people like that too. One in particular always says 'I hate being the center of attention', but then does everything in her power to BE the center of attention in some way, shape, or form. Even regarding events for other people, i.e. another mutual friend's wedding. That time I did let her know that it's "NOT ABOUT YOU" and she didn't say anything else then.

    My advice would be to ignore it and let it go. Or your response could be what you already had in your post "THE REST OF US DON'T GET HIT ON OFTEN, SO LET US ENJOY IT WHEN WE DO! " She would hopefully be able to laugh that off and maybe take a hint...
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,458 Member
    ...or say, "yes indeed, you are the most beautiful girl in the world. Thank you for being friends with such a lowly person as me."


    Sarcasm is my way. Passive-aggressive? Why, yes. I have it mastered.
  • cosmic0074
    cosmic0074 Posts: 91 Member
    Tell her, "Man, you ugly." and punch her in the face.

    Problem solved :drinker:


    Just kidding...ish.
    I have such an obnoxious, cocky narcissistic friend who sounds just like yours. When I first met her, I thought she was smoking hot.....that was BEFORE I got to know her lame personality, now she disgusts me.I distanced myself from her a couple months ago. Since she annoys me that much, I didn't see the point in being around her because I know if I said something, she's not gonna change; she'd probably threaten me and tell me I'm just "jealous" of her, so I thought distancing myself would be better. And it is :glasses:
  • luvs2teachincali
    luvs2teachincali Posts: 207 Member
    Wow. I agree that she is sadly insecure. I also think, like another poster, that she links all of her worth to her physical beauty. How sad is that? She is going to be one of those terrible, mean, nasty old women because with gray hair, saggy boobs, and wrinkles... her beauty will quickly diminish and she may just snap.

    I'd just nod and smile when she speaks about it and move right along.
    I mean I would think you'd feel sad for her... since you know nobody has found the fountain of youth yet. She must be terrified to get pregnant and to age. At least you are secure in who YOU ARE. What a shame. Poor lady.
  • penelepurr
    penelepurr Posts: 204 Member
    She's so vain.. I bet she thinks this thread is about her.

    lol!! ;)
  • shelbysp8
    shelbysp8 Posts: 131 Member
    I understand you being irritated by it; nobody likes to be around a person that is self - absorbed like that. I agree with futurestarz that you could talk to her about it and be specific and NOT accusing or she is just going to play the victim, which will again play into her "it's all about me" way of thinking. And if your other friends that she does it to would be honest they would probably talk to her too.
    AND as a last resort you can punch her in the face! :-)
  • Bethie_B
    Bethie_B Posts: 292 Member
    I punch my friends in the face all the time. But that's how I express affection.

    But, it may work for your situation too...
  • felice03
    felice03 Posts: 2,644 Member
    Take solace in the chances that she may still getting fat and ugly. I mean if she just got married, she'll likely have kids in the future and that can cause HAVOC. Plus the whole comfort of marriage is likely to pack on some pounds. Kepp the friendship...you want to be around for that fall don't you?
  • cosmic0074
    cosmic0074 Posts: 91 Member
    I punch my friends in the face all the time. But that's how I express affection.

    But, it may work for your situation too...

    :heart:
  • AmberLee2012
    AmberLee2012 Posts: 540
    If it bothers you that much, you should really something to her, but what? I had a friend that weighed about 90 lbs and who was always complaining about how fat she was. I always complimented her and told her of course she wasn't, etc., etc. for the longest time and then I started agreeing with her and offering her to join my diet. We aren't friends anymore. I'm not sure if she needed the reassurance or if she just liked bringing me down to make herself feel better, but I think it was the 2nd one because otherwise, we'd probably still be friends.
  • chrome_princess
    chrome_princess Posts: 129 Member
    She's so vain.. I bet she thinks this thread is about her.

    Win!
  • femmi1120
    femmi1120 Posts: 473 Member
    The way I generally handle these things (maybe not the best way) is to say something in the same "just kidding, but not really tone" to put her in her place. Example: "Haha, I'm sure the captain/pilot will be fine"
    Or occasionally light sarcasm will do it too "Oh the woes of married life..."

    Of course, the most mature way would probably be to just let her know up front how it makes you feel, but I just find those sorts of conversations way too awkward...
  • Ivian_
    Ivian_ Posts: 276 Member
    Take solace in the chances that she may still getting fat and ugly. I mean if she just got married, she'll likely have kids in the future and that can cause HAVOC. Plus the whole comfort of marriage is likely to pack on some pounds. Kepp the friendship...you want to be around for that fall don't you?

    This is why we're friends ♥
  • HotCuppaJo
    HotCuppaJo Posts: 476 Member
    She's so vain.. I bet she thinks this thread is about her.

    LOL....a little Carly Simon never hurt ANYONE.
  • allifantastical
    allifantastical Posts: 946 Member
    She's so vain.. I bet she thinks this thread is about her.

    lol yes!!
  • MireyGal76
    MireyGal76 Posts: 7,334 Member
    I invite them to come boxing with me... I agree with Dr Merc, a shot to the kidney hurts more.

    kidding aside...

    She is clearly very insecure in her own skin and doesn't see any value outside her looks. Maybe if she liked herself (or felt others liked her) for more than her looks, she wouldn't struggle as much.

    Maybe her hubby DOES compliment her looks so much that she's afraid that is all she sees... and is therefore constantly afraid of losing it. She has some mind issues to work through.

    Now it's your choice... do you want to wash your hands of it and walk away... or do you want to 'friend-up' and walk through this with her?
  • LetsTryThisAgain54
    LetsTryThisAgain54 Posts: 381 Member
    She is your basic attention *kitten*, plain and simple.
  • Rosytakesoff
    Rosytakesoff Posts: 321
    It's her world; you just live in it.

    Seriously, she is begging for attention. Don't feed the beast. Nothing you say will get through to her. I have a friend I've had to distance myself from due to her 'oh, poor me' attitude. Everything, and I do mean everything, is about her and how she gets screwed over and has it so bad all the time.

    I feel your pain. But I don't have time for this soul-sucking behavior, so I just don't engage. Find some friends who are interested in more than you propping up their egos.
  • HykerGurl
    HykerGurl Posts: 18 Member
    Send me her name and email, I will tell her what a McDoucher she is being :-) I have known people like that in the past and karma does catch up, they got really big after having kids and couldn't lose the weight and they always look haggered. Chin up buttercup and do yourself a favor, just don't talk to her. Exchange pleasantries occasionally, but don't keep a spot for that nonsense in your life. Life is short, it should be filled with happiness and adventure. Friends should lift you up!:flowerforyou:
  • MightyDomo
    MightyDomo Posts: 1,265 Member
    Whelp, not much you can do but confront her about it. If you don't say anything then she won't know.

    She should really be a friend that compliments you and others as much if not more than herself, that's what friends do right? Make each other feel good about themselves but at the same time find a way to be honest with each other as well.
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