I'm back...shoulda never left

Hello, My name is Jenny. I was here almost two years ago..I was doing good and continued to lose twenty or more pounds after I stopped logging..I had started a new job with crazy hours and was wore out all the time because I let them work me like a dog. I'm now working pretty regular hours and trying to get my life in order. I gained most of the weight back after settling into a routine and grabbing fast food on the run. I want to change my life. I'm tired of my back hurting from the weight. I know when I lose twenty pounds most of the pain will fade. After that its more for my health that I will be losing weight. I want to be here for my kids in the future. I want to know my grandchildren when my kids are old enough.

My children are still overweight but I have been introducing new vegetables into the house and they are responding well My youngest Lyndi has lost almost five pounds and has a thyroid condition. And my oldest Jessica has lost 4 pounds over the last two months..slow and steady We are wanting to make our lives better for us and we will!!

I had quit smoking when I first started this before. I was doing very well and went to my mom's house one day. I sat in her chair for a minute and literally picked her lit cig up out of ashtray and started smoking..when I realized what I was doing I couldn't stop. That was after over three weeks of not smoking. I was so angry with myself..but I went and bought a pack right after. Since then my mother has discovered that not only does she have COPD but also clogging in her arteries and needs a pretty serious surgery done..but can't because she has to lose weight. I am a big supporter..but she has bugged me many times to quit smoking when she keeps picking it back up. I am planning to quit in a couple days..I can't just throw away the money by not smoking what I have left and I'm not ready. But I will quit soon!!!! Very Soon!!! My mom is quitting tomorrow (I really hope she doesn't pick it back up) and so is my sister..We aren't going to be around each other..and I'm not letting them know that I'm quitting because if I do I want it to be for me..I don't want to be depended on and if I can't I don't want them to start again just because I gave up. Everyone depends on me and I don't want to let them down. I don't quit with a patch I quit cold turkey..so I get very agitated and use that to exercise

Basically I'm trying to change not only my life but my children's as well. They need a positive role model that will teach them how to stay healthy. I know I am already a positive influence, but I need to be the healthy influence as well.

So this is me changing my life