Sick of the 'Just join a gym' comments
princessrisariri
Posts: 162 Member
Set the scene, today at work all the guys are discussing what takeout to order today and ask me.
I say I cant I am doing a calorie count diet and have some food in the kitchen downstairs
Queue an argument I never asked for and leads into me just having to defend myself then everyone going off in a huff!
'Why don't you just join a gym'
'Well I would have to run for xhours to burn off anything so it hardly seems worth it'
'Well it will get you healthy'
'Gym alone is not enough you need to watch what you eat'
'Well you will get more healthy so thats all you need'
'Maybe I dont just just to be healthier, maybe I want to be thinner'
'Well you need to eat 2000 a day or you are not healthy'
'No I need to eat less than that to lose weight'
It goes on and on and on. Until i snap with 'I dont care I just want to be thin and how the **** am I meant to get to a gym enough to burn 500 cals a day when I work 14hours a day and take the bus everywhere?!'
The point being once I drop a bit of weight I will look into a gym I just don't feel comfortable enough in myself for it and I want people to support whatever little steps I am taking, but I just sound like excuses and whinging to someone who has a car and can drive everywhere/is a healthy BMI sized male who just likes going to the gym a bit but eats like ****.
It seems whenever you tell anyone you are dieting some person who has never had trouble with weight always stick their own ideas in and I want to scream 'I have picked something I think I can stick too as that is better than something that wont fit my lifestyle and what works for you might not work for me!'
Smug gits /rage'
I say I cant I am doing a calorie count diet and have some food in the kitchen downstairs
Queue an argument I never asked for and leads into me just having to defend myself then everyone going off in a huff!
'Why don't you just join a gym'
'Well I would have to run for xhours to burn off anything so it hardly seems worth it'
'Well it will get you healthy'
'Gym alone is not enough you need to watch what you eat'
'Well you will get more healthy so thats all you need'
'Maybe I dont just just to be healthier, maybe I want to be thinner'
'Well you need to eat 2000 a day or you are not healthy'
'No I need to eat less than that to lose weight'
It goes on and on and on. Until i snap with 'I dont care I just want to be thin and how the **** am I meant to get to a gym enough to burn 500 cals a day when I work 14hours a day and take the bus everywhere?!'
The point being once I drop a bit of weight I will look into a gym I just don't feel comfortable enough in myself for it and I want people to support whatever little steps I am taking, but I just sound like excuses and whinging to someone who has a car and can drive everywhere/is a healthy BMI sized male who just likes going to the gym a bit but eats like ****.
It seems whenever you tell anyone you are dieting some person who has never had trouble with weight always stick their own ideas in and I want to scream 'I have picked something I think I can stick too as that is better than something that wont fit my lifestyle and what works for you might not work for me!'
Smug gits /rage'
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Replies
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Ill tell you their routine at the gym.
Day 1: Chest/biceps
repeat0 -
why didn't you just say no, and eat the food you brought. No debate or argument. Sanity restored.0
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Do what you gotta do...Don't worry about what other people say. They all will have opinions..The only one that matters. Is YOURS!!!!!!0
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i have a long way to go and my partner is of the same idea you just need to do more exercise well i know this and being a office worker i don’t really do a lot of walking and stuff and to top it all im a desk muncher but i have had a bit of a break through
a mate of mine asked me to go to a zumba class and well i went thinking it would be a night nare and lots of look at the fatty finger pointing
you know what i loved it i felt great to and there where allsorts people there i tried the guy and hated it but you know what sometimes you just need to find something you love to do and go from there0 -
Wow, what a mess.....lol. I no longer explain myself to people, I have tried, and if they can be stubborn, so can I. You will learn to recognise the people who have all the answers and the ones who really want to learn. Don't feel you need to justify yourself to anyone. Being firm in your decisions without feeling the need the justify will earn you more respect, and if others cant respect that, then maybe you don't need them as your associates or people with whom you share your information.0
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Never volunteer the info that you are calorie counting, on a diet, whatever. All you needed to say was, "I bought my lunch." If they want to start a discussion, point out that they don't get to decide and you don't have to explain. It's called a personal life because it's personal.0
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Why do you feel you have to explain? Just answer that you brought your lunch today and are not interested in takeout and leave it at that. Don't get into a debate.
You can work in exercise throughout the day without going to a gym. I take short walks to the upper level of my building every hour or so. 10 minutes here and there add up. If you can get off the bus the stop before yours, you will add a short walk to your commute. If you add hand weights, you can increase some muscles while you are at it. I also have a treadmill in front of the TV, I use hand weights while I walk to Jeopardy.
Exercise will help you be thinner and healthy, though your food choices will make the most difference in your weight.0 -
Set the scene, today at work all the guys are discussing what takeout to order today and ask me.
I say I cant I am doing a calorie count diet and have some food in the kitchen downstairs
Queue an argument I never asked for and leads into me just having to defend myself then everyone going off in a huff!
'Why don't you just join a gym'
'Well I would have to run for xhours to burn off anything so it hardly seems worth it'
'Well it will get you healthy'
'Gym alone is not enough you need to watch what you eat'
'Well you will get more healthy so thats all you need'
'Maybe I dont just just to be healthier, maybe I want to be thinner'
'Well you need to eat 2000 a day or you are not healthy'
'No I need to eat less than that to lose weight'
It goes on and on and on. Until i snap with 'I dont care I just want to be thin and how the **** am I meant to get to a gym enough to burn 500 cals a day when I work 14hours a day and take the bus everywhere?!'
The point being once I drop a bit of weight I will look into a gym I just don't feel comfortable enough in myself for it and I want people to support whatever little steps I am taking, but I just sound like excuses and whinging to someone who has a car and can drive everywhere/is a healthy BMI sized male who just likes going to the gym a bit but eats like ****.
It seems whenever you tell anyone you are dieting some person who has never had trouble with weight always stick their own ideas in and I want to scream 'I have picked something I think I can stick too as that is better than something that wont fit my lifestyle and what works for you might not work for me!'
Smug gits /rage'
don't let your current size prevent you from starting a gym routine. I was almost 100lbs overweight when I started at the YMCA last year. I have only lost about 30lbs, but I have changed my body quite a bit! I was the girl who wore baggy tank tops and long shorts...now I wear tighter tanks and yoga pants
and I still have 50lbs to lose.
No one at the Y bothers me...except the old guy who messes with me 'cause I nag him to wear his oxygen
and another lady was teasing me for *only* using the stairmaster for 5 minutes. 0 -
Quit explaining yourself to them. Say no thank you and if they persist tell them they're being rude and walk away. No means no and you don't owe anyone an explanation.0
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Quit explaining yourself to them. Say no thank you and if they persist tell them they're being rude and walk away. No means no and you don't owe anyone an explanation.
Bam!! Awesomeness. Why do you owe them any explanation? Tell the to GTFO!0 -
Never volunteer the info that you are calorie counting, on a diet, whatever. All you needed to say was, "I bought my lunch." If they want to start a discussion, point out that they don't get to decide and you don't have to explain. It's called a personal life because it's personal.
^^this x 10000 -
Been there, done that, and have the membership card to prove it.
I have learned one thing - NEVER, EVER, EVER LET ANYBODY outside of folks who are really into fitness and nutrition know that you are counting calories, whether you are heavy or thin. There of course is simply saying no thank you and walking away, but some folks are dense and won't drop it at that. It's not always that simple.
You still will have to deal with food pushing, and it's tough. Even if I truly don't want something (different than trying to evade temptation), I sometimes get it shoved in my face anyways. It made me irate at first, but now I've just learned to roll with it - this is a lifestyle with 1,000,000 more benefits that dwarf this kind of rigamarole.0 -
Quit explaining yourself to them. Say no thank you and if they persist tell them they're being rude and walk away. No means no and you don't owe anyone an explanation.
Bam!! Awesomeness. Why do you owe them any explanation? Tell the to GTFO!
Agree. I just smile and nod and say "I got this" when people offer advice. If they persist I tell them "It's my choice, thank you. End of conversation."
That's all you have to do. I promise.0 -
Because when I said No, they said why, I said diet, they said 'don't do that go to the gym'.. and it goes on.
You cant walk away when sat on a desk with people for so many hours every day and consider them friends too and they didn't take no they pushed and questioned. I'm sure they think they are trying to help then it ends up ruining the friendships when I have to defend myself to stop getting nagged to 'come on just order, you know you want to'
I just expect too much for them to be supportive and say good luck or even just 'cool'0 -
being in a caoric defecit while not resistance training is horrible for the metabolism... someone 50+ lbs overweight can get away with it but someone trying to shed 20-30lbs needs to do some sort of strength training while trying to lose body fat.0
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I joined a gym, I just don't go lol. Was a waste of money for me, I'd rather take a walk outside.0
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Yeah I've found that telling people I count calories has 1 or more of these reactions
1. Confusion
2. telling me "you don't need to diet!"
3. "oh come on, it's just a _______!"
4. Angry at me for ruining their good time by bringing up calories
5. Telling me how they used to count calories and it never worked
6. Laughing with everyone else about how they don't worry about silly things like dieting
And it's always a time-waster and it always ends up with people thinking you are obsessive/anorexic/etc.
so although it's SO annoying, I agree with everyone else. It's best to just make something up that they can't respond to/argue with.0 -
tell them to go pound sand.0
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being in a caoric defecit while not resistance training is horrible for the metabolism... someone 50+ lbs overweight can get away with it but someone trying to shed 20-30lbs needs to do some sort of strength training while trying to lose body fat.
Im more than 50lbs overweight...when I lose 10lbs I will look into it then.
I do the walk from the next bus stop, run instead of walk up the office stairs, walk home from the shops type things but I would need some advise about resistance training, I don't own any weights and need help to know what to buy, how often to use etc so I don't just waste my money0 -
Hmm.
Well, I generally pick and choose the people I tell about my diet. Why? Because the people I know think it's simply the same .. just join a gym. But it's not that simple. Proper diet and exercising combined will get you there, among other things.
In this case, I would have just said "no thank you, I brought my lunch today." ONLY because, like I said, I pick and choose who I tell. I'm easily embarrassed by the topic of my weight or weight loss, so it's been my go-to for years. If you're firm, people tend to back off.
But, remember, you're doing this for YOU and YOU ONLY. You don't need to justify anything to anybody. Let them think what they want ... you got this!0 -
I do Kettlebells faithfully 3 x's a week most weeks. Have toned and feel good. That said...my eating has gotten out of control again and despite toning, no weight loss. My instructor asked me about what was going in my mouth. When we talked nutrition he said 75% of my weight loss journey will be what I put in my mouth. So don't listen to them....start with eating and can add exercise when you can. And doesn't have to be at a gym either....can walk, run, do workout videos or join a gym if you do choose. Good luck!!!!0
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You could just say, "no, thank you, I brought my lunch."
End of story. You are right, joining a gym is not the only answer. I gained weight while working out every day because I wasn't paying attention to what I was eating. Now I'm back to lose that weight plus the rest of what I wanted to lose to begin with.0 -
I have no words of wisdom. People suck. *hugs*0
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They sound like Ph.D's in Broscience!
As a general rule, I don't converse with non-MFP men about my diet and/or weight. They generally have no freaking clue what a realistic calorie goal is for a woman. They also have no clue how much harder I have to work to burn the same amount of calories that they do in the gym.0 -
you can do a number of strength training exercises with stuff in your house. a quick google search for free strength training or strength training at home can show you.
i use my wii, a resistance band and wrist/ankle weights. makes muscles i didn't know i had hurt, but good hurt
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being in a caoric defecit while not resistance training is horrible for the metabolism... someone 50+ lbs overweight can get away with it but someone trying to shed 20-30lbs needs to do some sort of strength training while trying to lose body fat.
Im more than 50lbs overweight...when I lose 10lbs I will look into it then.
I do the walk from the next bus stop, run instead of walk up the office stairs, walk home from the shops type things but I would need some advise about resistance training, I don't own any weights and need help to know what to buy, how often to use etc so I don't just waste my money
well first there are simple exercises that can be modified that u can do at home such as pushups, pullups, crunches, squats, lunges, etc all of that is resistance training and should be doing it to avoid muscle loss because the muscle tissue needs to be active or you will lose it on a defecit along with fat... and gym is an investment and so is hiring a trainer to atleast show you how to use the equipment so you dont injure your self.0 -
If these folks at work really are people you consider friends, perhaps you could approach them at a time when they're not discussing where to go to lunch, and let them know that you're going to be making an effort to improve your health, that you're planning your meals ahead of time, and that while you'd still love to go to lunch with them, it's better if you only go once a week, and if you can decide the day before where you'll go. That way you can work it into your plans, decide what you'll order ahead of time, etc. Ask them seriously for their help and support in this, and if they are indeed REAL friends, they'll understand this and hopefully even serve as bonus encouragement.
I've done this with my coworkers and they still invite me to lunches, but if I say I've brought something, they nod and go on without me, no hassle at all. That said, every Thursday, I have a standing lunch with a couple of them, and we go to the same place each week, so I can decide ahead of time what I want to order that day - no falling off track at all! :flowerforyou:0 -
Yeah I've found that telling people I count calories has 1 or more of these reactions
1. Confusion
2. telling me "you don't need to diet!"
3. "oh come on, it's just a _______!"
4. Angry at me for ruining their good time by bringing up calories
5. Telling me how they used to count calories and it never worked
6. Laughing with everyone else about how they don't worry about silly things like dieting
And it's always a time-waster and it always ends up with people thinking you are obsessive/anorexic/etc.
so although it's SO annoying, I agree with everyone else. It's best to just make something up that they can't respond to/argue with.
hahaha.. I could have written this.
In August of last year I told my sister I was doing this 'diet' (though I told her I was changing my life style) and counting calories. She went on and on about how she tried, but her body doesn't work that way and she never lost a pound.. etc. etc (This is a girl that loves pizza so much she eats it every day for lunch). This Christmas, she asked me "Oh my goodness, whats your secret? How are you losing weight?" and I told her counting calories, to which she replied.. "oh.. I guess maybe I should try again." (Then promptly ignored my showing her MFP, and offering to show her my low-cal pizza alternative..)0 -
just leave it at, you brought your own lunch and politely decline. no need to go into details with people0
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I see it already, you actually are listening and or paying way to much attention to what others think of you and your thoughts etc. The reason you said you do not go tot he gym is because you are a bit self concious. The main thing is you need to just do what you need to do for you and not worry about what everyone is trying to tell you how to do it. Opinions are just like the back side we sit on, everyone has one.
Personally I recommend to folks to start with just one area and get in the habbit of doing it, and then add on additional tasks / goals once you have the first one down well. I started going to the Y back in 2009 and told myself I just need to get in the habbit of going.. and here I am 2013 still go 3/4 days a week for 1 to 1.5 hours a day.0
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