It's hard being fat *and* Asian

TokyoRose85
TokyoRose85 Posts: 4
in Introduce Yourself
My family and friends are all skinny and small. I have actually had people tell me "You are supposed to be skinny, you can't be fat!" It is embarrassing to go back to visit Japan being this weight because of all of the dirty looks.

So much easier to gain weight since I move to America. Now is time to lose it!

Hope MFP work and I meet new friends here to help me.

I am 5'7" with no shoes, and my dress size has fluctuated anywhere between an 8 and 14 over the years. This makes me a big and tall Asian girl which is really uncommon because your typical Asian woman is 5'0-4" and a size 0-6 basically short, thin, and petite.

I always feel like a freak of nature particularly in large gatherings of Asian people where image conscious people are a plenty. Don't get me wrong. I love my clan, but that old country mentality can be particularly judgmental and mean. Sometimes they can give you the nastiest look when you go for a second egg roll. The ideal Asian beauty is supposed to look like some perfect Porcelain doll with perfect milky skin and a petite body, and I come no where near that Lucy Liu or Joy Luck Club look. I could pass for dastardly Dragon Lady though.

Growing up, often I wanted to scream and pull my hair out because frequently I heard things from the relatives like "You're so big for an Asian. How did you get so fat when all your cousins are thin?" Mind you a 12 is considered "fat" to the pestering Asian relatives when you're hovering around a sea of size 2s.

Replies

  • Monica_has_a_goal
    Monica_has_a_goal Posts: 694 Member
    Hey HUN, I'm not asian but I know what it feels like to be heavier than your siblings. Add me and let's lose the weight and get healthy! :smile:
  • Tisha247
    Tisha247 Posts: 849 Member
    It's hard being fat and Australian, all the beautiful supermodels and famous Australian actresses make me look bad. Everyone here is super fit and bronze.
  • yasemasuyo
    yasemasuyo Posts: 177 Member
    Oh, how I can relate to what you are saying! We can do this, 頑張りましょう！:happy:
  • trudijoy
    trudijoy Posts: 1,685 Member
    i so understand being white and speding lots of time in japan when you're tall, curvy etc. . . i get people stopping and going 'ara, deKAI'in the street and thinking i don't understand lol. The Japanese attitude to 'thin'is quite unhealthy. They tell me my ideal weight is 52kg... which puts me on the bad side of anorexic here! Japanese girls in particular are so hung up on numbers that they are fine with being unhealthy as long as they look thin.

    I say be healthy, happy, and ignore what is said. You know you're awesome :)
  • foreverjade
    foreverjade Posts: 213 Member
    There's an entire thread dedicated to this one.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/372702-asians-trying-to-lose-weight

    Not sure how to link to a thread but hopefully that one works, and you'll find tons of us sharing your same story :)
  • TokyoRose85
    TokyoRose85 Posts: 4
    There's an entire thread dedicated to this one.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/372702-asians-trying-to-lose-weight

    Not sure how to link to a thread but hopefully that one works, and you'll find tons of us sharing your same story :)

    Thank you!

    and thanks for replies everyone!
  • mazzasweet
    mazzasweet Posts: 266 Member
    So sorry for your hurt! Please know that you are beautiful and perfect just as you are!! Here to support you! I'm not Asian but I'm a lot fatter than you doll :-)
  • asaxygirl
    asaxygirl Posts: 3 Member
    I completely understand. I'm half Japanese and grew up in Yokohama and Yokosuka. Not only did I stand out with my curly hair, but I was fat by Japanese standards. My mother lives about 10 minutes from me in so-Cal and every time she sees me the first thing that is said is "maaaa... debu ni natta ne?" (translation: My, you've gotten fat.) I'm short like a typical Japanese but my bone structure and foot size is all German form my father. /sigh Sad to say but my weight has been one of the biggest reasons why I have not been home to see my aunts, uncles, and cousins in 25 years. My cousins children have children! That is how long I have been away.

    I'm here for you, sister!
  • jennyrebekka
    jennyrebekka Posts: 626 Member
    I spent some time in Japan about 20 yrs ago....and just went back to revisit my "family" there. I didn't know much Japanese when i was last there, but now I do (a little anyway).......enough to hear my Japanese "mother" gasp and say how BIG I had gotten.

    Yup - - but one thing i know for sure is that it will just make you sad to try living up to everyone else's expectations for you - - no matter what culture you are part of.

    Gambatte!
  • KCookN
    KCookN Posts: 13 Member
    My boyfriend is Filipino, and upon meeting his family they were all thin except for some of the men lol. He would always make comments of, "you cant gain weight when your Asian, all you eat is rice." Well when we would go out and see a bigger Asian he woulf say she must of married a white guy. I don't know why its not Asian to be bigger, everyone struggles with weight.
  • Saaaam42
    Saaaam42 Posts: 154 Member
    Asian, black, white, purple, green, blue....it's hard being overweight no matter who you are.
  • Honeytips
    Honeytips Posts: 337 Member
    Asian, black, white, purple, green, blue....it's hard being overweight no matter who you are.

    Totally agree :ohwell:
  • kwseneca
    kwseneca Posts: 79
    I never really thought of that, but it is so true. At least you live in America where everyone is tall and fat!

    Also....
    It is better to be tall and fat than short and fat like me!
    I can gain like 5 lbs and look like 50 lbs heavier. ANNOYING!
  • himilayaneyes
    himilayaneyes Posts: 204 Member
    Black culture celebrates curves and many complain about being too skinny. However, this tolerant attitude makes it easy for weight to balloon out ofcontrol. However, I am still familiar with hurtful comments about weight. Add me as afriend. We can do this.
  • LaLouve_RK
    LaLouve_RK Posts: 899 Member
    OH NO! America as ruined Japan!!!!! lol

    Seriously, there's many reasons to get fat in the north american continent. Many reasons that tastes good.

    Yet... there is so many asian good stuff... yum!

    Well let's start getting in shape! You can do it!
  • darrensurrey
    darrensurrey Posts: 3,942 Member
    Asian, black, white, purple, green, blue....it's hard being overweight no matter who you are.

    Right. And what about grey, eh? EH? Racialist! Post reported!
  • Saaaam42
    Saaaam42 Posts: 154 Member
    Asian, black, white, purple, green, blue....it's hard being overweight no matter who you are.

    Right. And what about grey, eh? EH? Racialist! Post reported!
    Hmmm.....grey people are a "grey area" :wink:
  • darrensurrey
    darrensurrey Posts: 3,942 Member
    Asian, black, white, purple, green, blue....it's hard being overweight no matter who you are.

    Right. And what about grey, eh? EH? Racialist! Post reported!
    Hmmm.....grey people are a "grey area" :wink:

    http://youtu.be/yj3DBcpfMNQ
  • yasemasuyo
    yasemasuyo Posts: 177 Member
    @KcookN

    Wow, if he's already making comments like that, I would suggest you get rid of him! :noway:
  • IronGirlShae
    IronGirlShae Posts: 58 Member
    My mom's side of the family are all tall and thin. Norwegian blood.I'm a head shorter and a foot wider than almost everyone! I'm adopted, but I look more like my dad's short stocky Polish relatives. They aren't really mean to be for putting on weight (mom was when I was a teenager) but whenever I lose weight all the over excited compliments make me wonder what they aren't saying when I'm big.

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