Reacher/Settler

DamnImASexyBitch
DamnImASexyBitch Posts: 740 Member
Was watching HIMYM and it was the reacher/settler episode. Do you believe that's the dynamic in most relationships? Are you the reacher or the settler?

Honestly I think I am the reacher, and my husband is the settler. Probably stems from my lower self esteem, and his over abundance. If I asked him, he would just laugh and not truly answer...lol

Replies

  • DamnImASexyBitch
    DamnImASexyBitch Posts: 740 Member
    This is getting buried by all the other troll stuff. Bumping cause it's real.
  • DamnImASexyBitch
    DamnImASexyBitch Posts: 740 Member
    Really? No one wants to participate?
  • Windy_
    Windy_ Posts: 1,012 Member
    I've been the settler in the past fo sho.
  • BrettPGH
    BrettPGH Posts: 4,716 Member
    I kissed Jenkins.
  • BeachGingerOnTheRocks
    BeachGingerOnTheRocks Posts: 3,927 Member
    I think we keep switching roles. Right now I think I'm the reacher and he's the settler.
  • DamnImASexyBitch
    DamnImASexyBitch Posts: 740 Member
    I kissed Jenkins.

    I thought Jenkins was a man...lol
  • hbrittingham
    hbrittingham Posts: 2,518 Member
    I think we keep switching roles. Right now I think I'm the reacher and he's the settler.
    ^^^^This^^^^

    I also think it's the perception of the people in the relationship. While I would say that I am the reacher and he's the settler right now, I can almost guarantee you that he feels that it's just the opposite.
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
    I think it's cyclical.
  • MB_Positif
    MB_Positif Posts: 8,897 Member
    I was thinking this was hard to answer, but after reading other responses I agree with the fact that we switch off in that role.
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
    I think it's dumb...
  • I agree
  • DamnImASexyBitch
    DamnImASexyBitch Posts: 740 Member
    I think it's dumb...

    I'm thinking you're either single, or a constant reacher...lol
  • links_slayer
    links_slayer Posts: 1,151 Member
    My wife DEFINITELY settled :)
  • wolverine66
    wolverine66 Posts: 3,779 Member
    My wife DEFINITELY settled :)

    Same here.

    But I think if you asked her, she would say she was the reacher. What "helped" me was she was in a couple relationships before me that were bad, so by comparison, I look better. Thanks, unknown douchenozzles
  • CakeFit21
    CakeFit21 Posts: 2,521 Member
    We are both different TYPES of reachers and this is a problem. We are reaching for different things.
  • rob1976
    rob1976 Posts: 1,328 Member
    In our relationship, I think that it depends on the topic. We both reached for some things while settling for others.