Im seriously about to call it quits

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I have been at this a month, and I have lost a whole 3 pounds!!!!

I can't seem to stay under my calorie goal, and I cant get the energy to exercise.

I am ALWAYS hungry and way to tired to exercise once I get home and get the little one bed.

I don't know what to do anymore. I am tired of going hungry.

I know I need more filling foods, but I just can't afford it.

I don't know what to do, I don't want to quit but I am getting absolutely NO WHERE!!!!!! So WTF is the point?
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Replies

  • smae1980
    smae1980 Posts: 794 Member
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    First of all 3 lbs in a month is not bad, everyone's journey is different!! What do you eat, what do you do for exercise, how much do you and the husband work/go to school, how old is the little one? Answering these could help us help you if we have a little better of and idea what your day is like
  • LilMissAngi
    LilMissAngi Posts: 127
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    what I eat? That really depends on what is available. This past week it was either a granola bar or a banana at about 9:30. Which didn't not last until my lunch at 1. But it was all I had.

    Then at lunch I would eat a sandwhich, PB&J or Turkey on whole grain - once again it is all I had available, well there was pizza too but I went with the better choice.

    then about 3-4 o clock I would eat a granola bar or banana to hold me until dinner til 7 or 8 (which never kept me full) I drink water though out the day. and I don't get off work until 6 or 6:30

    I have a desk job, but I do get up every so often to take orders to the warehouse. My son is almost 2 so he keeps me on my toes.

    I put my son down about 8:30 or 9, then I do homework and go to bed about mid night. and do it all over again.

    So has you can see, by the time I get off work it is time to give my son a bath, make dinner, eat dinner, clean up the kitchen put him to bed do homework and go to bed.

    I have tried to get up earlier in the mornings to go walk before I go to work, but every time I get up early my son gets up, since he hears me in the bathroom. SO then I have to get him up and fed and dressed and blah blah blah blah....

    I really don't know what to do.

    I'm sure some people are thinking that i have it easy and if they can do than I can. No one understands how stressful my life is... so don't go saying that unless you have walked a mile in my shoes.
  • sciurussck
    sciurussck Posts: 2 Member
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    It can be tempting to stick with it with so much going on. There are little tweaks you can do that help though. I've found that you can use the kids to help with exercising. Just taking them for a walk makes a huge difference not just on the scale but with keeping the right mind set. I've used my kids to count off as I'm doing reps while lifting or doing ab stuff. It is amazing how getting them involved makes it less of a "work" out and more like fun. Meals can be trickier, but doable. When we get back from the grocery, I'll take the veggies and get them rinsed off and put in storage bags. That way when I am craving a snack it is as easy to grab carrots or celery as it is to find chips or candy. I know some people who will cook some chicken breasts a couple of times a week and keep them in the fridge. Then they just heat them up and use them in whatever dish they choose. It's a simple way to take away some of the excuses we all make when we get frustrated. Just stick with it and you'll find ways that work for you.
  • smae1980
    smae1980 Posts: 794 Member
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    No I would never say you have it easy, you work go to school and have a toddler, that's like 3 full time jobs And I feel ya, I'm in the same boat!!! You aren't eating too bad, but all those granola bars, while convenient, add up to a lot of sugar and extra carbs and depending on what kind you get, refined white flour which is little bang for your buck, so to speak.. Try apples, oranges, baby carrots, lowfat or fat free yogurt, small servings of nuts or seeds or other seasonal fruit as snacks or lunch components to fill in the spaces. You will get more whole foods, lower calories (except with the nuts), more fiber and more variety of vitamins and minerals by eating these instead of granola bars. Plus all of these travel well( except the yogurt) I bring these to school in my back pack on a regualr basis. As for exercise, can you use a gym at school? You'd be suprised at what just 30 minutes can do for you. How helpful is your husband, or how helpful is he willing to be? that can make a huge difference. My fiance is very supportive and helpful, he will take our daughter out to play so I can stay in and workout. Is that an option for you (realistically, don't just say no because you would feel to guilty to ask)
  • lisawest
    lisawest Posts: 798 Member
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    I know you're frustration. Believe me I do! I will tell you what I did. Then, after you answer the questions already posted, we can give you more personalized ideas. When I started this journey my husband started with me. That was an invaluable help. We started by just keeping our portion size in check. I started with the recommended 1lb per week deficit. (What do you have your weekly loss set at? Trying lowering it. 2lbs to 1lb, 1lb to 1/2lb, etc. constant hunger, and lack of energy are both symptoms of starvation mode. Does necessarily mean that, but it's a possibility!) I made a concerted effort to have a veggie at every meal (and I don't count potatoes:cry: ). I concentrated on getting in at LEAST 8 cups of water a day. (It's amazing how dehydration affects the appetite! Easy way to tell if you're drinking enough is when you use the restroom. The paler the water is when you're done, the better!) I quit eating out, mostly. :blushing: When we do eat out, we try to keep to Subway, Applebee's, and other places that we KNOW we can get fairly healthy choices. As the portion control became habit, and thus easier, I moved on to controlling the amount of sodium. However, my honest opinion is to do it one step at a time. Really focus on portion size and your calorie goal. Once that is "easy" THEN move on to other goals you have for yourself.

    As far as exercise, I admit that I still don't exercise like I should. :ohwell: Mostly I walk. (I live in a small town, and I walk the mile to my daycare and back everyday.) It's hard when you are so busy. I have found some videos online that are quick "office" workouts that you can do at your desk. I haven't tried them, :blushing: but I plan to.

    Send me a PM if you have other questions. The hardest part is finding that balance between your hunger and your calorie deficit. Please don't quit! You NEED to do this for you and your family. Here are some thoughts I try to keep in mind when I'm frustrated:
    If not you, then who? If not now, then when?
    If you quit now, you will NEVER reach your goal!
    Does this _______(insert food name) taste as good as being healthy will feel?

    Ok, this was really long. Sorry:wink: Please answer LadyBird's questions, as well as the ones I've posed. The more information we have, the better suggestions we can give you. YOU CAN DO THIS!!!!!!

    ETA: By the time I had finished this longwinded mini-book, you had answered several of the questions! After I re-read those answers, I'll post some more specific ideas!
  • shellygirl003
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    DONT GIVE UP, Your doing a great job!!! Congrats on the pounds lost. I have an 18 month old and find getting up earlier in the morning to workout before she gets up is best for me. Also, I'm not sure if your drinking enough water, but recently realized I hadn't been drinking enough and felt too tired to work out or even to go outside and play with my daughter. I wasn't able to concentrate and I was eating whatever.... no motivation, blah, blah blah... Anyway, I was reminded of the importance of water several times during a week's period and decided to drink more. I now carry a reusable water bottle and drink water all the time. I feel absolutely fantastic thanks to increasing my water intake and prayer. I have the motivation to get up between 4:30 and 5:00 AM and the energy to workout for 45 minutes, work a full day and come home and still have energy to walk a mile with my daughter or visit the park. I thank God for the revelation and I always pray for the continued energy and motivation. As far as food budget. I completely understand and find it best to shop at discounted stores like Aldi. I buy canned fruit (rinse off the syrup with water), yogurts, Turkey, salad mix, and etc...at lower costs. to help with portion control, I use my daughters small toddler bowls because adult bowls are big and we naturally want to fill them up.

    Try to stay focused. Remind yourself what you have accomplished. You've already identified your problems; energy and exersize. Tackle them and don't allow barriers to get in the way. The "enemy" wants us to feel sorry for ourselves and he loves quiters....

    "No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to us all. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it. (NIV) 1 Corinthians 10:13"
  • waymethb
    waymethb Posts: 21 Member
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    okay it sounds like you and I are a lot alike...(I have three girls 9, 4, and 2 a full time desk job and I am currently studying for my RHIT exam..so homework every night)

    First lets start with eating...I found if I eat a breakfast I'm not near as likely to want to eat all day. I usually try and eat a protein for breafast such as some yogurt or breakfast meat and it usually will keep me full until lunch. Then I have a smart ones or watch my portions for lunch...ie just eat one serving of something instead of a whole plate full. Then I have an afternoon snack of rice cakes or fresh fruit or even a granola bar. Then dinner is usually healthy proteins of what I or hubby cook for dinner for the rest of the family.

    Now exercise....if you don't feel you have 30 minutes to devote to cardio...like a treadmill or workout video...then try this....try parking just a little farther from work then you are used to and walking into work...do it at a fast pace both in and out of work. Take the stairs at work too..if there is any.... Or take your son to the park and well he's playing (if you can) run around the park a few times...

    Its really the little things that we do during the day that will burn calories...even breathing...so please don't give up...you will start seeing results and I'm with the other posters...3lbs in a month is good!

    Hope this post helps and if you want you can add me as a friend....
  • mhesterruns
    mhesterruns Posts: 49
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    It is hard with kids and work/school. I have a 2 and 12 year old. plus as a school administrator I work non stop 6:30 - 5:30 most nights. When I first started my new position (in August) we had moved to a new city and I was feeling the stress. I lost the gym I had been going to religously and longer work hours. I really had a hard time justifying joining a gym or even going for a walk. I wanted to come home and just relax with my girls. I felt like I never saw them plus I had all the worrying of a new job, a husband who was looking for a job and going back to school for a new career, plus higher cost of living. For about 4 months I didn't wathc my food or workout at all. I gained 15 pounds and lost any toning that I did have. I finally had to make a goal for myself- to run a 6k. I started to run right after work-like 5:45 start time or later depending on the day. I still have the same situation but the working out- I run- helps me. It makes me feel good and is a stress reliever. I turn to it instead of food. I change at work and thten park in the drveway. It helps me to do it by not seeing my youngest cry as I leave to run. She never knows. She greets me and seems proud that I was running.
    As for food healthy stuff is expensive. Make small changes and watch your calories. Your breakfast doesn;t seem to be much. I eat a bowl of Special K every morning and take some kind of fruit for a snack about 2 - 3 hours later. Start changing your shopping list slowly and it will not be as costly. Small steps didn't shock my grocery budget as much.

    To me it is a commitment to my husband and girls to be around long term which means I have to get healthy as well as being a role model for my family. Both my girls saw me cross the finish line and beat my time. The baby may not remember this one but she will the rest of them eventually. My 12 year old and I were able to have a conversation about my goal and how I accomplished it and even did better. She was proud of me. So I miss the 45 mintues I spend running 3-4 days a week with them but it is the me time I need to be better for them- now and later.
  • LilMissAngi
    LilMissAngi Posts: 127
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    I am drinking water everyday, not has much as I should, I have a bottle that is 8 oz, and I fill it up in the mornings, and by lunch I fill it up again.... so about 16 oz. I know I need at least 64 oz ) But man that is a lot of water!
  • smae1980
    smae1980 Posts: 794 Member
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    I am drinking water everyday, not has much as I should, I have a bottle that is 8 oz, and I fill it up in the mornings, and by lunch I fill it up again.... so about 16 oz. I know I need at least 64 oz ) But man that is a lot of water!


    What else do you drink?
  • remolding
    remolding Posts: 25 Member
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    Lilmissanji, Hi ,no expert here, but looking over your food for your typical day, I think you are eating too many carbs and not enough protein? Try celery with peanut butter, i oz. almonds, etc. My exercise person I work with, has her Masters, 2oz of protein for every meal, at least , you need protein for muscle. Banannas are ok, but full of sugar, one bananna has lots of sugar in it, one of the most fattening fruits out there, do you like blueberries? Just a suggestion, by the way 3lb is good, so don't give up.:flowerforyou: Good luck.
  • shellygirl003
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    Water is very important!! The symptoms of dehydration include physical and mental fatigue, weakness, and changes in appetite. I used to love water, but now I don't so much. I do have to force myself to drink it but after seeing the difference it has made on my physical and mental well being, its getting easier. I'm sure flavored water can help...The only downfall is having to visit the little girls room on a more frequent basis. But, it is nice to get a break from the office.
  • lisawest
    lisawest Posts: 798 Member
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    I'm gonna take this once part at a time, and add some thoughts. Keep in mind that I don't know your personal tastes, allergies, budget concerns, etc. So PLEASE take these in the spirit of help that they are offered!
    what I eat? That really depends on what is available. This past week it was either a granola bar or a banana at about 9:30. Which didn't not last until my lunch at 1. But it was all I had.

    I have found some granola bars that keep me full longer. They are Walmart Great Value brand High Fiber bars. (Compare to FiberOne bars, but cheaper.) As LadyBird mentioned, not necessarily the BEST choice, but it's better than the choices I was making before!:laugh: (Pop Tarts are NOT healthy!:laugh: ) I also usually have BOTH the bar and the banana for breakfast. Keeps me fuller longer. Adding a cup of milk ups the fullness factor.
    Then at lunch I would eat a sandwhich, PB&J or Turkey on whole grain - once again it is all I had available, well there was pizza too but I went with the better choice.

    Add some veggies (carrot sticks, celery sticks, etc.) to that sandwich and it sounds like a pretty decent lunch.
    then about 3-4 o clock I would eat a granola bar or banana to hold me until dinner til 7 or 8 (which never kept me full) I drink water though out the day. and I don't get off work until 6 or 6:30

    Perhaps, as LadyBird suggested, you could try to switch up this snack. Nuts are good, but be sure you measure out a serving! I made this mistake! Just a few nuts can pack a BIG walup of calories. High fiber fruit, such as apples, paired with a little peanutbutter or cheese work well also. A good tip for snacks (and meals!) is to pair a carb (fruit, veggie, etc.) with protein.
    I have a desk job, but I do get up every so often to take orders to the warehouse. My son is almost 2 so he keeps me on my toes.

    Don't they just? My little man will be 3 this summer. CONSTANT chasing!
    I put my son down about 8:30 or 9, then I do homework and go to bed about mid night. and do it all over again.

    You are my hero! After reading your schedule, I really am impressed with how well you are keeping it together! As LadyBird said, you have 3 full time jobs!
    So has you can see, by the time I get off work it is time to give my son a bath, make dinner, eat dinner, clean up the kitchen put him to bed do homework and go to bed.

    I have tried to get up earlier in the mornings to go walk before I go to work, but every time I get up early my son gets up, since he hears me in the bathroom. SO then I have to get him up and fed and dressed and blah blah blah blah....

    I tried that, too, for about 2 days. I am NOT a morning person!
    I really don't know what to do.

    I'm sure some people are thinking that i have it easy and if they can do than I can. No one understands how stressful my life is... so don't go saying that unless you have walked a mile in my shoes.

    Babe, I can imagine how stressful it is (and I'm sure that even the imaginings don't hold a candle to the actual stress!) Unfortunately I have discovered that the higher my stress level is, the harder it is to shed weight.:sad: I don't have any suggestions for stress reduction. If I did, I would be using them myself! I just try to do a little something for myself a couple times a week. Last week it was a 35 minute shower one morning. (Ok, so it helped that hubby had the kids a whole state away for his sister's graduation, but you have to take what you can get!) This week was super busy, so no "me time" yet. Although I did go to bed earlier than usual last night and read a "for fun" book, not a text book! So I suppose that counts. I know lots of people use their exercise time as their "me time." I also try to use "cuddle time" as a relaxing time. Small steps. Here's another quote for you, "A journey of a thousand miles starts with one step."
  • Zara11
    Zara11 Posts: 1,247 Member
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    Sounds like you need different foods. If you give a daily budget (i.e. $10, $15, etc) you have for food, maybe that will help get something affordable, filling, and as healthy as possible, esp. if you have limited/little time on weekends to cook a lot in preparation for the weekdays.
  • smae1980
    smae1980 Posts: 794 Member
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    [
    I have found some granola bars that keep me full longer. They are Walmart Great Value brand High Fiber bars. (Compare to FiberOne bars, but cheaper.) As LadyBird mentioned, not necessarily the BEST choice, but it's better than the choices I was making before!:laugh: (Pop Tarts are NOT healthy!:laugh: ) I also usually have BOTH the bar and the banana for breakfast. Keeps me fuller longer. Adding a cup of milk ups the fullness factor.

    Don't get me wrong, I am in no way putting granola bars down, in fact if you look at my diary, which is fully public by the way, I got nothin to hide(LOL), I eat them often, but I stick to Nature Valley or Kashi and avoid quaker(high frucrose corn syrup and no whole grains)and I eat them with fruit or yogurt or both to round things out and fill me up better. On the days I have an 8 oclock class, I often eat a granola bar and an apple or orange in the car on the way to school( I have a half hour commute) You just have to mix it up.. I bring either a nonhydogenated Peanut butter with low sugar preserves on whole grain bread sandwich, or hummus on whole grain, with fruit and carrots to school for lunch on my long days. The peanut butter is a liitle more expensive, but get it on sale and stock up, that's what i do


  • SarahAlt
    SarahAlt Posts: 44
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    I can totally relate to you. I have a two year old and a 4 month old. I work from 8:30 to 4:30 every day but I get up at 5:30 so I can shower and eat breakfast, get the girls ready and take them to daycare which is 10 miles the opposite direction from work so i have to leave the house at 7:30 just so I can make it to work on time. Then I get off a 4:30 and I have to drive to pick them up. I never get home before 5:30 anymore unless it's pure luck. Both girls are starving by the time i get them home so I throw my oldest a snack and nurse the other for however long she needs to. Usually about 30-45 minutes. If I have something quick in the freezer like a bird's eye skillet dinner I can have supper on the table by 7 and usually take both girls for a walk by 7:30. They add to my exercise because I carry one in a sling on my chest and push the other in the stroller. And this is on the nights my husband works late. When he's not working nights, we ahve lots of variations. So I know what it's like to be busy and not have any "me" time.

    Do you still take your prenatal vitamins? My doctor suggested I keep taking mine after my first was born. They're great for helping with energy. And I have to say I've been taking them every morning for 3 weeks straight (that's better than I did while I was pregnant) and my energy is as high as it was when i was a single, young thing.

    As a suggestion, if you give your son a bath every night, why don't you put him in the stroller after his bath and walk until he falls asleep?

    Also, if money is an issue for eating right, is your kid on WIC? They now offer vouchers for fruits and vegetables as well as food items like tortillas, bread and brown rice. The program has reformed itself from just making sure mothers and children get protein and milk to covering other sources of nutrition. It's also not just for "poor" folks. It's for middle income families too and your child is eligible until he/she is 5. This might help with freeing up some grocery funds to go to other kinds of food like meat and healthy snacks and yogurt.

    Oh! And i have found one of the best, filling snacks is a plain rice cake with peanut butter. The protein in the peanut butter helps you feel not hungry longer.
  • KatieM7
    KatieM7 Posts: 588 Member
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    Your schedule was shocking to me! I would have to agree with the person that said you are their hero. I know what it is like to be busy. I am a stay at home mom of SEVEN children from 9 years to 8 months. :laugh: I can't imagine having a full time job, school, and a 2 year old. Don't be so hard on yourself. :noway: I think the key is make changes slowly and to not look at the full picture at once it gets too overwhelming to do that. So like was said before concentrate on portion control and keeping calories under. If you can get you hubby to help out with bathing your son and getting him ready for bed and do your workout then I would say go for it. If not then incorporate your son into your exercise. I sometimes use my children as weights for the arms and legs (very good workout plus they have fun with it). I used to think the same thing as far as water that 64 oz. was a lot of water but it has helped me a lot. I have a lot more energy then I did before. Yeah I may be visiting the "little girls" room more but I feel better when I drink more water. I have noticed that for me it is easier to remember to drink more when I have a bottle of water with me all the time. I even freeze some so that I can have cold water. As far as the food I would say shop around for the cheapest healthiest deals that you can find (here there are stores that are quite a bit cheaper then the "main" stores).
  • lisawest
    lisawest Posts: 798 Member
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    Don't get me wrong, I am in no way putting granola bars down, in fact if you look at my diary, which is fully public by the way, I got nothin to hide(LOL), I eat them often, but I stick to Nature Valley or Kashi and avoid quaker(high frucrose corn syrup and no whole grains)and I eat them with fruit or yogurt or both to round things out and fill me up better. On the days I have an 8 oclock class, I often eat a granola bar and an apple or orange in the car on the way to school( I have a half hour commute) You just have to mix it up.. I bring either a nonhydogenated Peanut butter with low sugar preserves on whole grain bread sandwich, or hummus on whole grain, with fruit and carrots to school for lunch on my long days. The peanut butter is a liitle more expensive, but get it on sale and stock up, that's what i do

    Sorry, that's not what I meant to imply! I was being interrupted by my own little ones and didn't re-read carefully enough! Sorry! I was more referring to the part about when you mentioned some different fruits and veggies as replacements. I was not trying to imply that you had said granola bars are evil.:blushing: Sorry again.:flowerforyou:

    I am going to admit a serious personality flaw. I've never tried hummus. I know lots of people who love it. I have a texture aversion (I can NOT handle the texture of beans.:sick: ) and I'm concerned about spending the money on it only to discover that I can't eat it. I hear it's a great protein source and works well as a dip for almost any veggie. I'm really wanting to try it, but afraid to spend/waste the money if I don't like it. *sigh* Enough about my personal short falls.

    There have been lots of great suggestions on here so far. Take it one step at a time. One decision at a time. Focus on one thing this week. If it goes well, add something next week. If it doesn't, focus on it again next week. This is about replacing bad habits with better habits. Eventually you will be able to replace the better habits with the best habits. (I don't claim to know what those are, but I think they are ones that work for you, and you can sustain for a lifetime.) Each step you take gets you closer to your goal. Before you started, you had 50 lbs to lose. Now you only have 46. Great job! In another month, hopefully you will only have 42 left. I know you would like to see quicker results, but quicker results sometimes (I stress SOMETIMES) mean they won't last. You want/need results that will last. It may take a year to reach your goal, but the journey will make you healthier for life!:drinker:
  • Rhondabill
    Rhondabill Posts: 8 Member
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    Don't quit...you're just getting started...make sure what you eat has protein...protein to give you the energy you need to keep up with everything on your plate...protein to help burn calories...some suggestions
    Peanut Butter on apple slices
    Peanut Butter on celery
    You'd be surprised just a couple of apple slices or celery w/peanut butter takes the edge off...
    Keep us posted on your progress...you'll get there
  • LilMissAngi
    LilMissAngi Posts: 127
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    Thanks guys!

    You guys bring me up when I am down.

    School is over for the semester (I passed with straight A's!! YAY!) So that should allow me more time to focus on me!

    I have thought about carrots and celery for snacks, but I never thought they would fill me u for a long period of time. Now with peanut butter... that may work, and actually sounds really good!

    I am not much for nuts or anything but I can try and see if things have changed since I quit smoking.

    I get paid on Friday so hopefully I can stick to what I have until then.

    Thanks guys, I really don't know what I would do with out!

    Feel free to add me as a friend, as I tend to need a kick every once in awhile!

    I am feeling confident about this now!:bigsmile: :bigsmile: :bigsmile: :bigsmile: :bigsmile: :bigsmile: