What to do?

tifalva
tifalva Posts: 220 Member
edited January 11 in Motivation and Support
Looking through my cookbooks there are so many recipes I'd like to try, problem is I have an extremely picky and stubborn husband who doesn't like to try new things. He's Puerto Rican so most things have to be cooked his way (steak, turkey, chicken if its on the bone). Cooking 2 meals is a pain and he gets huffy about it. Grrrrr, why can't he just be willing to trust me and let me cook what I want?
Makes it hard to stay motivated to eat healthy when I'm so limited in what we can cook for meals. All suggestions are welcomed

Replies

  • LisaO85
    LisaO85 Posts: 152
    You can always use the trick my mom used on us when we were little. She cooked dinner and if we didn't like what was in front of us she would say " There's the kitchen have at it"

    Maybe you and your husband need to sit down and have a conversation about kitchen duties. If he really won't eat what you want to cook maybe you could split up the days and take turns cooking. On the days he cooks you will just have to watch what you eat a little closer.

    Or you could each cook your own meals. I know that seems counterproductive, but if he really isn't going to budge on his eating you may have no choice, maybe a couple of weeks in the kitchen will change his mind.

    Good luck
  • JenniBaby85
    JenniBaby85 Posts: 855 Member
    I would cook enough for both of you, and if he doesn't like it, then you can have leftovers the next day :tongue: .

    I am fortunate though, my hubby is on board with me and what I cook. :love:
  • fitfreakymom
    fitfreakymom Posts: 1,400 Member
    http://www.companyscoming.com/cookbooks/original-series/healthy-recipe-makeovers/1/HRM/
  • tifalva
    tifalva Posts: 220 Member
    I would cook enough for both of you, and if he doesn't like it, then you can have leftovers the next day :tongue: .

    I am fortunate though, my hubby is on board with me and what I cook. :love:

    That must be nice. If I try anything new he's in the kitchen watching over my shoulder to make sure I'm not putting "anything nasty in it". I think he forgets I'm pickier than he is do if I like it, chances are he will too. Grrr
  • fitfreakymom
    fitfreakymom Posts: 1,400 Member
    not sure how to paste links but if you copy and paste that link it will bring up a cookbook that I just bough
    The rue in my kitchen I am not a short order cook and this is not a restaurant lol eat what is put in front of you or make it it yourself
  • fitfreakymom
    fitfreakymom Posts: 1,400 Member
    If he is not on board with your cleaner eating then he can make his own meals.
  • JENNY7634
    JENNY7634 Posts: 67 Member
    Its tough....i usually cook something different for myself so I get this!! I did talk to my husband about it and got him to understand how important this is to me. If its two totally different meals then he is in the kitchen with me helping prepare. I have found easier ways too.... like if I want chicken I throw a bone in breast on the grill for him and a boneless skinless one on for me. If i making fries I bake them with half the tray regular fries and the other half sweet potato for me. Then I just do healthy side choices like salad and steamed veggies. If he wants rice, potato, mac and cheese hes on his own to prepare it. Its working so far. Sounds like for you guys maybe cooking in the kitchen together making separate meals is going to be better? I think cooking together is actually fun and you can both have what you want and its the same amount of time if your both doing it. Let us know how it goes : )
  • justinegrey
    justinegrey Posts: 59 Member
    Just wait until you have kids... I use to have to do every meal 4 ways (me, him, each child due to ages). Now we all eat similarly, but I make slight changes (either adding things for them, or substituting things out for me) and also I portion my food out before we eat. Sounds like a lot of work but if it's the same meal, it's not a huge deal.


    Example:

    My husband and kids want the traditional shepherd's pie so I make one for them... yellow potatoes, mixed veggies and organic leaf ground beef. For me, I make a smaller version for myself (not double the work as I use the veggies and potatoes) but I will substitute 70% of the potatoes out for steamed cauliflower (which steam while I'm cooking the other stuff) and sub the ground beef out for lentils (which again, I sautee with onions and tomatoes while the ground beef is doing the same). They get generous helpings of theirs, I get a specific calorie mindful helping of mine and we all win

    That might have been a time consuming example haha, that's a Saturday or Sunday dinner. But for the week, I'll make them pasta, and I'll use zucchini noodles instead - but same sauce. Or they get organic ham and cheese sandwiches, I get ham and cheese, no bread. Etc.

    Hope that helps. If he's that picky, just give him what he wants and cook what you need by making variations :)
  • Ascolti_la_musica
    Ascolti_la_musica Posts: 676 Member
    If he is not on board with your cleaner eating then he can make his own meals.

    QFT

    I stay at home, so I cook lovely meals for my husband that I know he will love. Then I eat my salad and chicken/fish/whatever. It takes me about 5 minutes to throw my dinner together once he gets home.

    If I could leave the house, you better believe my husband would be doing a lot of his own cooking!
  • tifalva
    tifalva Posts: 220 Member
    If he is not on board with your cleaner eating then he can make his own meals.

    QFT

    I stay at home, so I cook lovely meals for my husband that I know he will love. Then I eat my salad and chicken/fish/whatever. It takes me about 5 minutes to throw my dinner together once he gets home.

    If I could leave the house, you better believe my husband would be doing a lot of his own cooking!

    I wish I could be stay at home. Then I'd have a chance to cook different things and be more on my game. Might have to try pre-cooking healthier options for me then making whatever he wants.
  • jzammetti
    jzammetti Posts: 1,956 Member
    You can always use the trick my mom used on us when we were little. She cooked dinner and if we didn't like what was in front of us she would say " There's the kitchen have at it"

    I agree with that.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,458 Member
    If you're both working, he needs to step up his game and start etiher cooking for himself, or eating what you make.

    Even though you've let him push his agenda thus far, and even if he is Puerto Rican (which, don't know what that has to do with anything other than the Latin-Male Alpha thing).

    This is 2013. Women who work shouldn't be 100% responsible for making the meals. Take turns. No complaining when the other person is cooking, and whoever isn't cooking that night does the clean-up.
  • tifalva
    tifalva Posts: 220 Member
    Even though you've let him push his agenda thus far, and even if he is Puerto Rican (which, don't know what that has to do with anything other than the Latin-Male Alpha thing).

    They have their own style of cooking, which is absolutely yummy but very heavy in rice and oil.
  • MorgueBabe
    MorgueBabe Posts: 1,188 Member
    You can always use the trick my mom used on us when we were little. She cooked dinner and if we didn't like what was in front of us she would say " There's the kitchen have at it"


    This. I come from the school of thought grown men, can cook for themselves if they don't like what I make.
  • billsica
    billsica Posts: 4,741 Member
    He isn't on a diet. Make him a sandwich. He will appreciate it.

    You can just prep meals in advance. Make yourself stuff on Sunday and freeze it for the week.
  • Shes1CraftyMama
    Shes1CraftyMama Posts: 152 Member
    I too have picky eaters in my family. My husband insists on drowning everything in sauces and no my kids too. We can not change the habits of those around us, but we can call on them for support. Sit down with your husband and calmly discuss your concerns and problems. Come up with a solution TOGETHER! Maybe it can be something where he cooks what he wants 2-3 times a week and you are in the kitchen with him making something for yourself alongside him, or you can even slightly alter the recipe to have less oil, put the rice on the side of yours first (remove it all together) make his recipes slightly healthier....just some ideas the other 3-4 days (depending of if you eat out or do leftover nights) you cook dinner how you want it and he eats it. Agree to this for a time - say one month. Then he can choose if he likes some of your recipes and is willing to eat them again (which I bet he will even if it means drowning it in something =)) and then you can continue to work through it with him. I am sure there is a good side to this where you are not having to do this alone. Even if he doesn't want to join you on this journey ask him to support you and be your fan. I am sure he will be happy with the results in the end ;)
  • strivingfor130
    strivingfor130 Posts: 221 Member
    I struggle with this too. My boyfriend does not like to cook. He also hates most all vegetables and is very picky when it comes to what he eats. Thankfully he does eat baked chicken, pork, beef, etc so it makes it easier for me. I usually make a healthy meat choice and then make him two sides (usually starches or beans since that is all he eats) and then I just make me one vegetable. I have told him I will probably start making him eat one side with his meal since I'm cooking three sides and most of his goes to waste because I don't help him eat any of it or leftovers just never get eaten. I've also thought about serving him the leftover side dishes for the next dinner. When we have things like quesadillas, hot dogs, burgers, pizza, etc. I just limit my serving size. I also bake our french fries instead of frying them.
  • PottsvilleCurse1925
    PottsvilleCurse1925 Posts: 354 Member
    Sounds to me you just can't please your man!
  • sa11yjane
    sa11yjane Posts: 491 Member
    I don't really have any answers but I empathise as I am a vegetarian but also cook for 2 meat eaters and a very picky carb-loving daughter. Sometimes I just want to scream!!! Recently I have been just making vege versions of some meals (plus a carb-meal for the daughter!!) as I am so fed up of cooking meat meals that aren't always even appreciated! Ultimately, if they don't like them.....help yourself to something else! Good luck! xxx
  • links_slayer
    links_slayer Posts: 1,151 Member
    You can always use the trick my mom used on us when we were little. She cooked dinner and if we didn't like what was in front of us she would say " There's the kitchen have at it"

    Worked for me growing up, too.
  • LadyIntrepid
    LadyIntrepid Posts: 399 Member
    My sweetheart does most of the cooking and I'm happy to have him do it, but he's very heavy on butter, sauces, oils, meats. Rather than making a separate meal for myself, I simply watch my portion sizes. I get out my little scale and weigh everything. And frankly, if you don't scarf too fast (as I tend to do), heavy foods can also make you feel fuller faster. I've lost weight and maintained fine watching quantity.

    But since you're doing the cooking, you can cook the food he likes but try to swap out some ingredients to make it healthier without losing the essence of the meal all together. Less butter. Leaner cuts of beef. Spray oil to grease the pan rather than butter or straight vegetable oil. Take the skin off your pieces of chicken. Brown rice instead of white. If regular brown feels too heavy for your man, brown basmati or jasmine has lighter quality to it. Get creative and watch your portion sizes. You got this!
  • PaulFromEssex
    PaulFromEssex Posts: 245
    Unbelievable!!!

    Anyone who has a meal cooked for them should be very grateful. If you do not like what is placed in front of you, then you should get off your backside and cook something you do want.

    When I was with my ex, I did 90% of the cooking. I knew what we all liked and didn't like and prepared healthy meals based around these likes. If they didn't want it, or changed their mind, then they had the option of sorting themselves. They would moan, but still ended up eating the meal anyway ... so it obviously wasn't that bad!!:laugh:

    Unless you are paid to be a chef / cook, providing different meals for each sitting should be at your choice, not at others demand.

    Well, that's my opinion anyway.
  • jesz124
    jesz124 Posts: 1,004 Member
    It must be very hard being a victim.......err, I mean woman

    Lol how do you always manage to say what I'm thinking?! OP stop making excuses to quit and just cook what you want. Me and my partner eat totally different meals.

    It's no big deal, us women can multi task! You can totally cook 2 things at once with no hassle. Its very rare we eat the same food. In my opinion it's no harder to cook 2 different meals than just one. Just plan ahead.
  • MrsSWW
    MrsSWW Posts: 1,585 Member
    Let him cook for himself! End of!

    Fortunately my husband eats most everything I cook, but if he doesn't like it he makes his own!
  • jgrode1984
    jgrode1984 Posts: 112

    Anyone who has a meal cooked for them should be very grateful. If you do not like what is placed in front of you, then you should get off your backside and cook something you do want.

    ^THIS! Hopefully your hubby can get on board with your wanting to be healthy. Maybe he could try it too. :)
  • fitfreakymom
    fitfreakymom Posts: 1,400 Member
    Unbelievable!!!

    Anyone who has a meal cooked for them should be very grateful. If you do not like what is placed in front of you, then you should get off your backside and cook something you do want.

    When I was with my ex, I did 90% of the cooking. I knew what we all liked and didn't like and prepared healthy meals based around these likes. If they didn't want it, or changed their mind, then they had the option of sorting themselves. They would moan, but still ended up eating the meal anyway ... so it obviously wasn't that bad!!:laugh:

    Unless you are paid to be a chef / cook, providing different meals for each sitting should be at your choice, not at others demand.

    Well, that's my opinion anyway.

    agreed! and if he do's not like what you cooked then he can get his own supper
  • makaiya
    makaiya Posts: 80 Member
    What to do?
    1. Stop making excuses for not eating for your health.
    2. Stop generalizing Puerto Rican behavior. That's not a cultural issue, that's a him issue.
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