Am I acting like a mother to my husband???

mmddwechanged
mmddwechanged Posts: 1,687 Member
edited January 12 in Chit-Chat
We share most things, he cooks me dinner as much as I cook him dinner. He's the kind of guy who puts everyone else's needs before his own. So lately he has been complaining about a sore back. I have suggested, then told, then repeated, then nagged him to go and see a massage therapist. I was never a very good masseuse and now I'm useless because of an injury. So I prepaid and booked massage therapy appts for him and kind of coerced him a bit to go. So the question is am I a pushy b***ch, the best wife in the world, or just acting like a mother? :)
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Replies

  • Cindy873
    Cindy873 Posts: 1,165
    Did he go to the appointment? If so, pat yourself on the back for a job well done and don't worry about labeling yourself.
  • christabel6
    christabel6 Posts: 173 Member
    Difficult. In the end it would be better if he chose to look after himself, but since he isn't, maybe a bit of pressure is what it takes.
  • mmddwechanged
    mmddwechanged Posts: 1,687 Member
    I'll let you know tomorrow how it turned out. I think he's going to LOVE it!
  • sunsnstatheart
    sunsnstatheart Posts: 2,544 Member
    Looks like I need to talk to my moth . . .wife
  • concordancia
    concordancia Posts: 5,320 Member
    Well, since massage therapy isn't always the best thing for a back, I think you are just being odd.
  • iAMsmiling
    iAMsmiling Posts: 2,394 Member
    Why is simple care taking become the sole purview of "motherhood?" Makes it sound somehow negative if you're just taking care of someone you love.
  • edge_dragoncaller
    edge_dragoncaller Posts: 826 Member
    No

    What you did can be viewed as being motherly if someone WANTS to see it that way, but really....you're just trying to take care of him like a good spouse should (goes both ways). When my wife is sick, I do everything I can to take care of her, but I sure as heck don't consider it "mothering" her.
  • mmddwechanged
    mmddwechanged Posts: 1,687 Member
    Well, since massage therapy isn't always the best thing for a back, I think you are just being odd.

    It's funny you say that, people who know me well call me odd too. Hmmm
  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,834 Member
    I'll take the massage.
  • mmddwechanged
    mmddwechanged Posts: 1,687 Member
    Yeah tbh, if I was graded on how well I take care of my SO I'd probs get a needs improvement, I was really just fishing for complements. Thankyou btw:)
  • clydethecat
    clydethecat Posts: 1,087 Member
    i do stuff like this for my husband all the time. i dont think its being his mom, i think its being his wife. we take care of each other. there are things i put off for myself that i should do but dont, and he gently pushes me to do them, i do the same for him.

    about his back tho, he might want to see a physical therapist. my husband was having some bad back issues and we went to see a pt and got some exercises to do. it helped a lot. massage is awesome, dont get me wrong, it just may be a bigger issue.
  • _the_feniks_
    _the_feniks_ Posts: 3,412 Member
    If the massage comes with a happy ending, you are the best wife in the world.
  • mmddwechanged
    mmddwechanged Posts: 1,687 Member
    If the massage comes with a happy ending, you are the best wife in the world.

    Damnit! I don't think it does! :(. And I so wanted to be the best in the world!!:(
  • Micahroni84
    Micahroni84 Posts: 452 Member
    Oops
  • Micahroni84
    Micahroni84 Posts: 452 Member
    I absolutely hate it when my husband tells me I'm acting like his Mom. And it hasn't happened for years now because i made it clear that me caring about him and pushing him to get well when he is sick or injured is not about me trying to mother him. Its about me 80% caring about him and 20% not being able to stand his man whining any more.
  • sunsnstatheart
    sunsnstatheart Posts: 2,544 Member
    Well, since massage therapy isn't always the best thing for a back, I think you are just being odd.

    Yea, call me odd too.
  • sizzle74
    sizzle74 Posts: 858 Member
    I think that was very nice of you.
  • mmddwechanged
    mmddwechanged Posts: 1,687 Member
    Ok, I've already designated February as protein month, March will be designated as push... I mean "care for" my husband more month.
  • mmddwechanged
    mmddwechanged Posts: 1,687 Member
    I think that was very nice of you.

    Thanks:). I was a bit slow in getting here, but now I'm actually proud of myself:)
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
    Depends. Did you prepay for the VIP treatment or is he on his own?
  • mmddwechanged
    mmddwechanged Posts: 1,687 Member
    Depends. Did you prepay for the VIP treatment or is he on his own?

    I'm not really sure what that means davpul.
  • stumblinthrulife
    stumblinthrulife Posts: 2,558 Member
    Sounds like a nice thing to do. I'd be happy if my wifey did the same for me.
  • stumblinthrulife
    stumblinthrulife Posts: 2,558 Member
    Depends. Did you prepay for the VIP treatment or is he on his own?

    I'm not really sure what that means davpul.

    I think this is another 'happy ending' reference :laugh:
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    You're a sweet wife. Or a not too bright one depending on what kind of masseuse we are talking about.
  • monikalama
    monikalama Posts: 75 Member
    Well, since massage therapy isn't always the best thing for a back, I think you are just being odd.

    I Agree
  • KodAkuraMacKyen
    KodAkuraMacKyen Posts: 737 Member
    That doesn't sound motherly to me. It sounds concerned.
  • peckish_pomegranate
    peckish_pomegranate Posts: 242 Member
    I don't think worry about your significant other's health is being motherly. If you were picking out his clothes and making his lunch with the crust cut off, that would be. He really should take care of himself though!
  • twinketta
    twinketta Posts: 2,130 Member
    Looks like I need to talk to my moth . . .wife

    That actually made me laugh..the `moth` thing then I realised you meant `mother`
  • supertracylynn
    supertracylynn Posts: 1,338 Member
    If you need to ask, you probably already know the answer.
  • HopefulLeigh
    HopefulLeigh Posts: 363 Member
    I'm not entirely sure what's up with the wife/mom comparison thing today. It sounds like you're just concerned about your husband and like you know that he won't put himself first. My husband's the same way. Unlike you, I suck. I'd probably just bring him an aspirin ...
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