Try, try and try again

Weight loss has been something on my mind since I was in high school, while I have had successful periods of loss I want to maintain loss and finally get to a healthy weight. I really would like to get a healthy weight for my height and body type, but also to change my life style before it is too late. I come from a family with several health issues, heart trouble, diabetes, obesity, etc. I want to change my life style so I can stay healthy enough to avoid a few of these. Recently I have reached my highest weight and am not happy. Since being with my boyfriend (1 yr 7+ mo) I have gained about 25 lbs, I picked up his bad habits and added them to my already bad habits. I have lost most of my confidence and it is getting to the point where I am constantly calling myself fat in front of my boyfriend, whom loves me the way I am, but I want to love me. He fell in love with me for my confidence and I want that back, not for him but for myself.

The ultimate turning point is that I went to my yearly exam and found out I weigh to much for a certain contraceptive. The required limit is below 198, whereas a year ago I would have been fine and now I am no longer eligible. How did this happen?

So, recently my boyfriend and I made a deal that he will quit smoking and I will lose weight. Now, I am determined to beat him and either way it's a win win. We have not set the stipulations of the agreement, but I am determined. My first goal is to meet the 198 lbs requirement and to go from then on. I am setting small goals little by little. Any advice is helpful, I am more concerned about my diet as that is my main focus, I cook for the both of us so it can be difficult. But I am just utterly lost on what my diet should be, I want the best for a normal healthy diet. Like I said this is a life style change, not a temporary fix. I come from a family where the majority of us are on the heavier side. I don't want this for my future. Because if I am only 22 and going to school. what happens when I become a parent and have less time for myself. I want the CHANGE and I NEED the CHANGE. I am interested in any tips, encouragement because I am here to be serious.