I am so sad and discouraged!

I am so sad, I just can't make progress. I know people will say you have to keep trying, or you're not trying hard enough. But alot of my problem is stress eating and anxiety. I have anxiety problems and if i don't eat enough I get anxiety. My job and life is super hard and long and I just eat to get by. Really nothing else helps that I have tried. And the more i exercise, the more I want to eat. I feel like I will never get into shape!!
«1

Replies

  • Now, the more excuses you make the slower you'll lose weight and progress.
  • DontStopB_Leakin
    DontStopB_Leakin Posts: 3,863 Member
    If your anxiety is that bad, see a therapist.


    Otherwise, stop making excuses. We all have our issues. You either want to lose the weight, or you don't. There is no in between.
  • concordancia
    concordancia Posts: 5,320 Member
    When you "diet" how many calories are you getting? If you are under eating, extreme hunger can feel very similar to anxiety.

    If, on the other hand, you are having anxiety tracks because you think you are starving, even though you are eating 1600 calories, you need professional help.
  • knittnponder
    knittnponder Posts: 1,953 Member
    I have anxiety too and I have found that the worse I eat, the worse I feel. I can't do a lot of sugar or simple carbs, no artificial sweetener and I have to limit caffeine. Exercise helps because it takes care of that extra adrenalin that's floating around when you have an anxiety attack and your body goes into fight or flight mode.

    You can take control of your life or like the others have said you can keep making excuses. But don't be surprised when nothing changes.
  • volleygirl1980
    volleygirl1980 Posts: 121 Member
    It's not always easy to lose weight, which is why so many people fail. I would encourage you to see someone about your anxiety..and find a friend to take this journey with for support..

    Good luck!
  • AislinnKitten
    AislinnKitten Posts: 18 Member
    You're not alone, and although I don't talk much to people on this site, you can feel free to add me. I eat out of stress constantly, hence why I'm here :p, well part of the reason at least. Honestly I think you're probably trying extremely hard, and I can say that from my own experiences with trying my hardest but succumbing to my issues at times. Unfortunately it's not something you can cure quickly, oh hell I've been at this for a while now so if there was a quick fix to anxiety and stress/binge eating I would let you know! haha. Don't give up though, really it won't help you any to do that. When you fall, don't be afraid to cry but make sure that when you're done to wipe your tears away and start again, cause eventually you will get it under control!!! As hard as it may seem believe in yourself! Also as far as wanting to eat more when you exercise well duhhh you should! :tongue: Just watch what you eat and how much, I've been trying to stay in my calories the best I can and when I work out I usually eat back all my calories (one because I'm hungry and two to make sure I'm getting enough protein and all the other goodies my body needs from food) and I'm still loosing weight, so you can absolutely eat back your calories, and doing so you shouldn't be very hungry afterwords, as long as you choose the right foods (the right foods will also help not only psychically but emotionally as well!!!)

    And lastly, as cliche as it is, I always like to remind myself that everything will be okay :smile: , it's hard to say especially when things are so bad that you can't even believe yourself when you say it, but it will help eventually! :happy:
  • SoViLicious
    SoViLicious Posts: 2,633 Member
    If your anxiety is that bad, see a therapist.


    Otherwise, stop making excuses. We all have our issues. You either want to lose the weight, or you don't. There is no in between.

    So true I made excuses until I was near 399 lbs and could not was down the street. It is hard, but you have to do it.
  • I know just how you feel, I too am an emotional eater. Don't give up, every day you can start again. You really can do this.
  • postrockandcats
    postrockandcats Posts: 1,145 Member
    If your anxiety is that bad, see a therapist.

    This. If your anxiety is affecting you this badly, weight loss aside, this isn't a "put up or shut up" thing.
  • Luv108
    Luv108 Posts: 18
    Thanks so much for the encouraging words! It just helps to hear kind words, that is greatly appreciated. And for the people who are saying harsh things about anxiety, I have gone to a year of therapy and I won't take offense to the insensitivities because it is obvious you have never dealt with this problem, it is unfortunatley a real thing, PTSD is just hard to live with.
  • DontStopB_Leakin
    DontStopB_Leakin Posts: 3,863 Member
    Thanks so much for the encouraging words! It just helps to hear kind words, that is greatly appreciated. And for the people who are saying harsh things about anxiety, I have gone to a year of therapy and I won't take offense to the insensitivities because it is obvious you have never dealt with this problem, it is unfortunatley a real thing, PTSD is just hard to live with.
    Went to therapy for 4 years for manic depression/suicidal thoughts, so yea, I know a thing or two.

    I wasn't *being* harsh, I was being direct and honest. I'm sorry that you couldn't see the difference.

    Put yourself first, and put down the food. Stop making excuses, and just. do. it.
  • I have had the same issue with eating to deal with stress. I started seeing a new doctor the 30th of November to help with my weight loss (my family doctor recommended him as he specializes in weight loss). He suggested keeping high protein/low carb foods near to snack on for those situations. It has helped. I eat A LOT of different types of nuts (sunflower seeds, mixed nuts, peanuts, cashews, almonds, etc.), popcorn, beef jerky, peanut butter, and also greek yogurt too. Maybe if you aren't allergic to any of these things it might help you?
  • Chibea
    Chibea Posts: 363 Member
    Her account is de-activated. I guess that was just now, because she can't post unless her account is active, right?
  • can you find another activity to reduce stress, like a candle lit bath, or lying in bed listening to quiet music, or reading a book?


    Also, your Dr. might prescribe an anti anxiety medicine that allows you to concentrate on eating properly
  • Chibea
    Chibea Posts: 363 Member
    Everyone here knows about the 'ignore' button, right? Use it!
  • Jump in on a motivating challenge group on FB. They are free and the group I am in is very inspirational to me! As harsh as it seems, the previous posts are probably kind of true. They say that excuses really only work for the person who is telling them and as long as you use these, you probably won't take ownership for your weight or health or whatever your goal is. It's hard work, and it can be done, but it won't be easy. Your WHY has to be stronger than your need to eat whatever it is you are eating that is bad for you. Good luck.
  • MoreBean13
    MoreBean13 Posts: 8,701 Member
    .
  • SOOOO I do the same thing! I get stressed I eat EVERY THING then I work out a lot later and make not progress. But now ive learned that before i go on a rampage of eating i drink a FULL glass of water and count to 100 slowly. Then i think of my goals and how unhealthy i was about to be. The water really helps!!!
  • firstsip
    firstsip Posts: 8,399 Member
    Thanks so much for the encouraging words! It just helps to hear kind words, that is greatly appreciated. And for the people who are saying harsh things about anxiety, I have gone to a year of therapy and I won't take offense to the insensitivities because it is obvious you have never dealt with this problem, it is unfortunatley a real thing, PTSD is just hard to live with.

    There is nothing more egocentric or more minimizing than someone making the assumption they've had it "worse" than someone else. Not everyone chooses to profess their issues online, or seek help from the internet. Ultimately, therapy is the best solution to anxiety. Even with medication in cases of chemical imbalance, therapy WITH medication works better than medication alone.

    So, no, it's never obvious if someone else has dealt with a problem or not; you don't know where someone is in their recovery or therapy, and many of us gravitate to these posts because we've dealt with it.

    But, you deactivated, so clearly you won't find any help here.
  • zillah73
    zillah73 Posts: 505 Member
    #1 Use MFP's resources to figure out your optimal daily caloric intake for healthy weight loss. DO NOT subscribe to the idea that "if 1500 calories is good, 1200 is better." You will be hungry, you will feel deprived, you will get anxious and food is all you are going to think about if you are not properly nourishing your body.

    #2 Plan your meals – every meal for the whole day, including snacks. This will ensure you are getting enough calories, fat, fiber, protein, etc. each day for optimal health. Once your meal plan is set, ONLY buy the groceries you need in order to eat according to your plan. If you tend to go out "cheat" on your plan by going out to eat, leave your cash/Debit Card/Credit Card home when you go out.

    #3 Get moving. Even if it is a 30 minute walk, do it. I worked in an office for 20 years. When I was losing the most weight, I would take about 30 minutes to eat my lunch, then get out and take a 30 minute walk. If you can join a gym and workout there, by all means, do it. But don't let the lack of that kind of resource stop you. The world can be your gym.

    #4 Drink Water. At least eight 8-oz glasses a day. And this is just water - not diet soda (which has been repeatedly show to actually cause obesity), not juice, not tea (caffeine will only counteract any attempts to hydrate), no "lite" fruit drinks, i.e. Crystal Light. Just plain old unadulterated water. I hated water when I started. Come to think of it, I hated it most of my life. I wanted things with taste. Within months of starting getting healthy, water became the only thing I craved and the only thing that could quench my thirst. And I drank more than 64 oz a day.

    #5 Relax and let it happen. You have to know that even if you never lose a pound in your life, you are an amazing, beautiful and worthwhile person. So, losing weight isn't the end-all-be-all and it really isn't worth stressing about. If you get enough nutrients, the optimal number of calories in a day, get exercise, drink water, get a good night's sleep each night, you will lose weight. It won't happen overnight so don't let diet program commercials and the like discourage you. Everyone's journey is different –but it will happen.
  • Ok lock thread, OP deactivated there acct...
  • linda0372
    linda0372 Posts: 27 Member
    I am like you. I'm a stress eater too. Its hard I know, but don't give up. I have been doing the gym and eating right for 11 months. I have lost a total of 46 lbs. I went from 321 lbs to 275lbs. You will see the change. Trust me, you will.
  • oh... that's sad... I would stop worrying about my weight and just focus on being consistent while seeing a therapist for your other issues. You can also try some motivation speakers on Youtube or something like that. That gets me going.
  • ines25
    ines25 Posts: 107 Member
    My friend I know where u coming from but stick the and I'll recommend u to drink SLEEPY TIME TEA EVERY NIGHT and try soothing teas to drink during the day. I was in a deep depression but thank to god after spending 2yrs in therapy which help and some natural remedies for my depression I'm doing great oh and I never took medication for depression it make u gain a lot of weight did my research and stick to vitamins and natural remedies. Do you take medication for your depression?
  • bigaussiebloke
    bigaussiebloke Posts: 257 Member
    This whole post is stressing me out...I need Chocolate!

    Seriously though....While I understand, and believe me, I really do understand, there has to come a point where you can either make a change or stay playing the victim of circumstances card... I hope you have the courage to make the change!
  • Aviendha_RJ
    Aviendha_RJ Posts: 600 Member
    Her account is deactivated. No point in continuing to buoy up her spirits.
  • EmilyJackCO
    EmilyJackCO Posts: 621 Member
    If your anxiety is that bad, see a therapist.

    This. If your anxiety is affecting you this badly, weight loss aside, this isn't a "put up or shut up" thing.

    DEFINITELY this. Honestly - I am a basket case without my therapist. And it has helped me learn to put caring for myself before all else. I have already worked 36 hours this week, and today was a half day. I work in a very high stress field as well - and it's really tough right now, on top of both my mom and my kitty dying a month apart in Nov & Dec.

    My anxiety is sky high - and I am coping without medicine and without overeating. What I will not give up - period - is my workouts. EVERYONE knows that this is how I keep my sanity, and those 2 hours 4x a week are non-negotiable. If I have to go to the gym and then come home and work for another 6 hours, so be it... but I won't give up on that. Find your coping mechanisms, besides food... I find that as much as I like lifting - cardio is what helps me burn the stress away. I think mainly because it's mindless, I have my music, and can think about nothing but the music and the burn...

    And if snacking helps - stock up on veggies and light cheese. Or tea & fruit. Nuts are always good too (I LOVE the chocolate roasted almonds). And portion them out in advance for work. But I find that solid scheduled meals help keep my anxiety more at bay. I still even eat my comfort foods - just slightly modified versions and in smaller quantities. I even still have fast food - I just make it fit into my calorie goals. And I work my *kitten* off.
  • bigaussiebloke
    bigaussiebloke Posts: 257 Member
    Her account is deactivated. No point in continuing to buoy up her spirits.

    Seriously..... smh

    Oh well I guess she played the card I was talking about....
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    If health and fitness is important to you then you will make it important. If your comfort and your relationship with food is more important that continue to do what you are doing to soothe your anxiety.

    I too suffer from this and find that I actually get depressed and sad, I've literally cried before, when I couldnt turn to food. It's not easy, but ultimatly you have to decide what is important to you.
  • Jennvandemark
    Jennvandemark Posts: 179 Member
    I also deal with anxiety and it took me a couple of years to get a grip on it. I still find it hard to be around new people and hate the idea of a crowd of people. I gained a good 60 pounds trying to eat my feelings during that low part of my life. I now combat my anxiety with exercise. I sometimes emotional eat but it's a part of my life I am trying to deal with and learn to live with. It's not going to change over night but take it one step at a time. I got help for my anxiety because it was leading me to a dark place. So by all means please seek help if you feel yourself going there. Chin up you will pull through this.