where do you find will power?

lculian
lculian Posts: 313 Member
edited September 21 in Motivation and Support
I was thinking about will power today. For me I don't know that my will power is the strongest. Hopefully you guys will have some ideas for me.
I find that I tend to follow rules well, but don't necessarily have great will power. For example no eatting after 8:30, no soda, and no candy from the candy drawer. I followed all of these rules for the first 2.5 months, and then when I hit 24 lbs lost I relaxed and only kept 2 rules. No soda, and no eatting after 8:30. So, needless to say I have hit the candy drawer at work pretty regularly. Today I re-instated the no candy drawer rule.
Besides rules what helps every one keep their focus?
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Replies

  • sniffles
    sniffles Posts: 295
    A few things keep me motivated.

    1) Anytime I look in the mirror I'm reminded of where I am. Usually this is enough to stop me from overeating.

    2) Anytime I see pictures of the people on here who've lost weight and/or are building muscle I am reminded where I want to be and I remember that I can't get there if I let myself be slack.

    3) When I run I feel FANTASTIC - this motivates me to continue running...

    4) When I feel overly restricted I let myself have a treat. Thinking I could NEVER have a treat again would completely bum me out, so I don't think that way... but I don't let that treat turn into a binge.

    The KEY phrase that I live by is this:

    The best way to resist temptation is to AVOID it.

    I do NOT allow chips, ice cream, cookies, pop, etc. etc. etc into my home. If I have those things I HAVE to have them when I'm outside of the house and/or I only buy a small SMALL amount (like one chocolate bar in the cupboard or a small 280 cal bag of chips)... this provides a home where late in the evening when I feel like a snack all I can find in the cupboards is veggies or fruit... or other less calorie dense things.

    It works for me MOST of the time.

    :)
  • workoutqueen628
    workoutqueen628 Posts: 220
    Yea, rules are easier. I find for me saying that I can't have any sweets at all is more effective than limiting the amount. Sugar is tricky because sometimes it's better to say 'NO' all together because once you give in, you just keep craving it. Keeping busy and out of the kitchen helps me not give in to cravings. Gum also helps a lot. You have to set realistic goals. It's okay to have candy every once in a while, but if your hand is always in the jar, then that's not good!
  • debnu1
    debnu1 Posts: 1,568 Member
    I was just reading in the book "love your brain, love your body" by Dr. Daniel Amen. He says that willpower is actually a pathway in the brain, we have to practice it to maintain that pathway. Once we lose the pathway we have to gain it back again.

    The way I maintain willpower is by setting up myself for success--keeping treats away, planning my meals ahead of time.
  • thebamboophoenix
    thebamboophoenix Posts: 58 Member
    What keeps my focus? I can't look at myself in the mirror or in photos etc. Need to sort that out, and that's what I'm doing.

    I find something quite liberating about being in control of what I eat and exercise. I am so encouraged by choices that I make. For example, I came in from work last week and wanted a nibble. I had a couple of oatcakes, no butter, measured portion of cheese and boy were they good. So good, I thought I'd have another two! But I inputted all 4 in to MFP before I'd eaten the next 2 and realised that a) it wasn't worth the calorie expenditure and b) 2 had been fine and I didn't need anymore. So I didn't have the extra 2. The second part of that is that I don't feel like I'm following a diet or denying myself things, it's just about making choices.

    In terms of exercise, I find something quite frightening about the big zero that sits there until you do something....

    And of course, when you start feeling better, looking better......why stop???
  • SimonLondon
    SimonLondon Posts: 350
    The longer I stay away from chocolate the less I want it. Had my first bar in 2 months last week and really didn't enjoy it.

    Poor old chocolate has lost it's wicked grasp on me :laugh:
  • KatieM7
    KatieM7 Posts: 588 Member
    What keeps me going is the way that it makes me feel to eat healthier vs the junk. Also the way I feel after exercise. After I have been exercising for awhile I build that self confidence plus the bod looks hot and the hubby can't keep his hands off of me. I love that feeling. I guess that is why we have 7 children! :laugh:
  • PJilly
    PJilly Posts: 22,253 Member
    I was thinking about will power today. For me I don't know that my will power is the strongest. Hopefully you guys will have some ideas for me.
    I find that I tend to follow rules well, but don't necessarily have great will power. For example no eatting after 8:30, no soda, and no candy from the candy drawer. I followed all of these rules for the first 2.5 months, and then when I hit 24 lbs lost I relaxed and only kept 2 rules. No soda, and no eatting after 8:30. So, needless to say I have hit the candy drawer at work pretty regularly. Today I re-instated the no candy drawer rule.
    Besides rules what helps every one keep their focus?
    What helps me most is having a plan, so I log everything into my food diary every morning before I eat it. That way, I don't have to think later about what "sounds" good and make a decision about whether to give into temptation or not. I include some dark chocolate at lunch and dinner as well as a glass of wine at dinner. This keeps me on track almost all of the time. If I find I am not satisfied and really want something I'm not getting, I'll edit my diary and figure out a way to work in what it is I want and what I have to give up to have it. Often that is enough to get me to stick to the original plan.
  • laurenk182004
    laurenk182004 Posts: 1,882 Member
    My motivation is that I quit smoking and drinking and don't want to gain more weight back from that, so it's all or nothin baby! lol Smoke free, booze free and junk food free, a whole new me lol Takes alot of willpower!

    As far as rules go, I don't really set any for myself. My only rule is to stay near my calories for the day, that's it. A little over or under, no biggie. I'm easy on myself :)
  • lculian
    lculian Posts: 313 Member
    The longer I stay away from chocolate the less I want it. Had my first bar in 2 months last week and really didn't enjoy it.

    Poor old chocolate has lost it's wicked grasp on me :laugh:
    I can't wait to have that kind of power!!! Way to go:bigsmile:
  • Thinwithin2010
    Thinwithin2010 Posts: 166 Member
    I myself just wrote a blog about my Dairy Queen obsession and it really turned out that I DON'T NEED IT! It was all wants!! The control Blizzards had on me was disgusting!! What an addiction.. Look at your candy drawer as a want and not a need and if that doesn't work get rid of the candy drawer.. Good luck!
  • Alyshe
    Alyshe Posts: 511 Member
    My will power comes from wanting to live life to the fullest. Our life here on earth is way to short to drag our feet. I will live life to the fullest and in oder to do so I need my confidence back. God has a purpose for all of us and Im going to find my purpose and Im going to soar through my short life here on earth. :) I hope that my will power that keeps me going will help you find your motivation. :)
  • sassyg
    sassyg Posts: 393
    I always used to find mine at the bottom of a bag of potato chips - you know, reach the bottom of the bag and think: right, that's IT, I'm changing NOW. Pity when it waned I had to get to the bottom of another bag of chips to find it again! :wink:

    Thing with WILLpower is that it's a bit too future-focused, and lets one get away with the present - "I WILL exercise more" "I WILL not binge in the evenings" And we all know, tomorrow never comes.

    I like DOpower. It's all about empowering yourself right now - "I DO exercise more" "I DO not binge in the evenings" - See, they're all about the now.

    It really helps if you say it out loud, too! :flowerforyou:





    (yes yes, i know what the 'will' in the term willpower actually means, but my interpretation is often quite relevant)
  • Heather75
    Heather75 Posts: 3,386 Member
    For me it is fairly simple. I don't like the way I look and feel when I am overweight and not exercising and eating crappy food makes me overweight. I just remind myself that the big picture is what's important and sweets won't make me feel better in the long run. Being strong and healthy will.
  • My45Chelle
    My45Chelle Posts: 18
    It's not just willpower, but how much you care about yourself and the long term goals you want to accomplish. I used to think living by rules was simple, great and easy, but once you break one, you really feel like a cheater, failure, or out of control. Dang, that is just too much work! Now, I remember my long term goal to be healthy, to have a treat (one treat) when I really need it (I always want treats!) and to make up my own rules about how I want to live and that helps motivate my willpower in a positive way, which benefits me.
    Keep up the hard, good work, you're worth it!!!
  • keeno67
    keeno67 Posts: 20 Member
    I just told myself NO MORE EMPTY CALORIES!! I use to be a litre a day soda drinker and just gave it up in an instant once I made a true commitment to getting myself into shape. I have no desire to return to the dietary habits I once had......eating pizza 3 nights a week, pound bag of peanut m&m's....etc......thought i was invincible.......now I eat right, am dedicatied to working out at least 3 times a week if not more and watch my caloric intake. Will power ultimately comes from within. Very cliche but very true at least for me. Sure, a pizza and a few m&m's sound good from time to time but not part of my endgame. Good Luck
  • sonjavon
    sonjavon Posts: 1,019 Member
    I don't know... I guess for me it's not willpower OR rules.... I made a lifestyle change. My new lifestyle doesn't require me to be perfect. It doesn't require me to say no to the things I love, to do things that I don't want to do or to eat things that I don't like.

    I eat what I like... just appropriate portions. I do exercise that I enjoy. At first I forced my water - but now I drink it because I KNOW that I feel better when properly hydrated, I have bad meals and I've had bad days or bad weekends... but that's part of my lifestyle... I just make the choice to make today a better day.

    What keeps me going on this lifestyle? I feel good. I'm looking better. And I'm really, really curious what I'll look like "at my best".
  • anikab
    anikab Posts: 150 Member
    I think for me, it's looking at myself in the mirror every day and hating all the jiggle, so when I go to eat empty calories I'm like ehh this isn't fueling your body with anything but sugar that's gonna end up back on your belly do you want that? NO. sounds weird but it works for me. I've also seen a lot of pics of people who started out weighing way more than I do and got down to the weight I want to get to and realize, hey if they did it I most def can do it! and I also don't want to 'look' like a mom. I want people to see me and be like wow, she had 2 kids?!
  • missygal
    missygal Posts: 60
    I was just reading in the book "love your brain, love your body" by Dr. Daniel Amen. He says that willpower is actually a pathway in the brain, we have to practice it to maintain that pathway. Once we lose the pathway we have to gain it back again.

    The way I maintain willpower is by setting up myself for success--keeping treats away, planning my meals ahead of time.

    That's a great book!!
  • debnu1
    debnu1 Posts: 1,568 Member
    I may have to buy the book. I got it from the library after seeing him on PBS--it is very motivating and insightful. I definitely have brain envy! :laugh:
  • robinsonmsn
    robinsonmsn Posts: 16 Member
    Thanks for the post..

    "we have to practice it to maintain that pathway"
  • lvfunandfit
    lvfunandfit Posts: 654 Member
    My goals keep me focused. The way I feel after I work out motivates me to run and go to the gym. I am motivated by results....

    Although, the last 2 weeks I have had no interest in logging my food. I need to get back on track and start eating better again.
  • Vallandingham
    Vallandingham Posts: 2,177
    Look under the couch cushion. I just found the remote, car keys and 47 cents.

    Found a half eaten hershey bar too -- so much for the willpower.
  • Soon2beskinny73
    Soon2beskinny73 Posts: 255 Member
    I used to have no will power and that was because at the time I did not care how fat I was because my bad food choices were more important to me at that time in my life. A person has to WANT TO CHANGE and if he/she is is not willing to change then there is no will power.

    I had to come to a point in my life where being healthy is more important to me than eating a big mac and fries but it took a LONG time for me to come to that realization. I guess the important thing is I did finally come to that realization and now I am doing something about my weight!!

    Now 73 lbs. lost later I would NEVER want to go back to what I used to be. I have a picture of me at my heaviest (420 lbs.) and I look at that picture several times a day and I NEVER miss looking at it because that is my reminder to keep going forward instead of going backwards.

    My motivations are:
    * I am looking so much better than I used too ....not just weight wise but also other things like my skin , it's clear , bright and overall looks so much better.

    * I FEEL so GOOD and everyday it gets better.

    * I can move much better than before and that is improving everyday too.

    * I am down two dress sizes and that feels AWESOME :)

    And the list goes on ........the positives definitely outweigh the negatives!! Do I get discouraged when I think "Oh man I STILL have 180 lbs. to lose"? Yes I do but all I have to do is look at that picture of myself weighing 420 lbs. and say to myself " Do you want to go back to that miserable person?" HELL NO :)

    I went from a 420 lb. diabetic who had MANY health problems ....reflux, breathing issues, hurting joints ect. to a different woman and even though my journey is far from over I can see the light at the end of the tunnel :) I have come a long way and I plan on going ALL THE WAY ....THERE IS NO STOPPING ME NOW :)
  • SassyMissDasha
    SassyMissDasha Posts: 614
    I used to have no will power and that was because at the time I did not care how fat I was because my bad food choices were more important to me at that time in my life. A person has to WANT TO CHANGE and if he/she is is not willing to change then there is no will power.

    I had to come to a point in my life where being healthy is more important to me than eating a big mac and fries but it took a LONG time for me to come to that realization. I guess the important thing is I did finally come to that realization and now I am doing something about my weight!!

    Now 73 lbs. lost later I would NEVER want to go back to what I used to be. I have a picture of me at my heaviest (420 lbs.) and I look at that picture several times a day and I NEVER miss looking at it because that is my reminder to keep going forward instead of going backwards.

    My motivations are:
    * I am looking so much better than I used too ....not just weight wise but also other things like my skin , it's clear , bright and overall looks so much better.

    * I FEEL so GOOD and everyday it gets better.

    * I can move much better than before and that is improving everyday too.

    * I am down two dress sizes and that feels AWESOME :)

    And the list goes on ........the positives definitely outweigh the negatives!! Do I get discouraged when I think "Oh man I STILL have 180 lbs. to lose"? Yes I do but all I have to do is look at that picture of myself weighing 420 lbs. and say to myself " Do you want to go back to that miserable person?" HELL NO :)

    I went from a 420 lb. diabetic who had MANY health problems ....reflux, breathing issues, hurting joints ect. to a different woman and even though my journey is far from over I can see the light at the end of the tunnel :) I have come a long way and I plan on going ALL THE WAY ....THERE IS NO STOPPING ME NOW :)

    Almost 95% the exact same reason for me!! Couldn't have written it better myself ..
  • thenebean9
    thenebean9 Posts: 216
    I started a group with my friends to lose weight. We rely on each other to reach our goals that we set our for ourselves because when we ALL meet our goal weights, we're going on a cruise. So where I sometimes can't motivate myself for myself, I hate letting people down, so I am motivated to help my friends. Though as I'm succeeding slowly but surely, the motivation is a bit easier because I can see the results and feel the difference! :)
  • mklawle
    mklawle Posts: 8
    Like most of us I have a deeeeeeep seeded love for chocolate and yummy foods! But to keep myself from buying snacks at work.. i keep absolutly no cash or change with me or in my car. This way It stops me from scrounging around so i can sabotage myself! Also, I dont keep any of that stuff in my house.. and even if my mom does buy it.. it stays in the fright downstairs.. out of sight out of mind!!!!
  • Jesusfollower72
    Jesusfollower72 Posts: 95
    "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" Philippians 4:13. I depend on God for my strength and will power

    "No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, so that you will be able to endure it." 1 Corinthians 10:13.

    These are the verses I rely on to get me through the temptations and give me the strength and will power I need.
  • byHISstrength
    byHISstrength Posts: 984 Member
    "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" Philippians 4:13. I depend on God for my strength and will power

    "No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, so that you will be able to endure it." 1 Corinthians 10:13.

    These are the verses I rely on to get me through the temptations and give me the strength and will power I need.

    Ditto for me!
  • Soon2beskinny73
    Soon2beskinny73 Posts: 255 Member
    I used to have no will power and that was because at the time I did not care how fat I was because my bad food choices were more important to me at that time in my life. A person has to WANT TO CHANGE and if he/she is is not willing to change then there is no will power.

    I had to come to a point in my life where being healthy is more important to me than eating a big mac and fries but it took a LONG time for me to come to that realization. I guess the important thing is I did finally come to that realization and now I am doing something about my weight!!

    Now 73 lbs. lost later I would NEVER want to go back to what I used to be. I have a picture of me at my heaviest (420 lbs.) and I look at that picture several times a day and I NEVER miss looking at it because that is my reminder to keep going forward instead of going backwards.

    My motivations are:
    * I am looking so much better than I used too ....not just weight wise but also other things like my skin , it's clear , bright and overall looks so much better.

    * I FEEL so GOOD and everyday it gets better.

    * I can move much better than before and that is improving everyday too.

    * I am down two dress sizes and that feels AWESOME :)

    And the list goes on ........the positives definitely outweigh the negatives!! Do I get discouraged when I think "Oh man I STILL have 180 lbs. to lose"? Yes I do but all I have to do is look at that picture of myself weighing 420 lbs. and say to myself " Do you want to go back to that miserable person?" HELL NO :)

    I went from a 420 lb. diabetic who had MANY health problems ....reflux, breathing issues, hurting joints ect. to a different woman and even though my journey is far from over I can see the light at the end of the tunnel :) I have come a long way and I plan on going ALL THE WAY ....THERE IS NO STOPPING ME NOW :)

    Almost 95% the exact same reason for me!! Couldn't have written it better myself ..

    Thanks girl! I thought maybe I put to much thought into this one LOL.
  • chocolateandvodka
    chocolateandvodka Posts: 1,850 Member
    SCOPE. lol.
    i'm only kind of kidding. but i have honestly found that if you brush your teeth and rinse with mouthwash after every meal/snack it's a lot easier to walk away from the table or vending machine. Plus, as an added bonus, you'll have a happy dentist!
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