Is this considered selfish?

MaryJane_8810002
MaryJane_8810002 Posts: 2,082 Member
If you won a brand new car from a text messaging contest but you do not have a drivers license (of course you are over 21). You leave the car in your parking space while you attempt to get your license. Your mother contacts you and says that she needs something to get around in. You know she smokes in the car and you want your car to stay new. Would you let her use the car until you get a license ? What would you do?

EDIT:Bear in mind you have only known her for a couple of years
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Replies

  • 2muchsauce
    2muchsauce Posts: 1,078
    If you trust her ................let her use it. The first time she smoked in my car would be the last though.
  • d2footballJRC
    d2footballJRC Posts: 2,684 Member
    If you won a brand new car from a text messaging contest but you do not have a drivers license (of course you are over 21). You leave the car in your parking space while you attempt to get your license. Your mother contacts you and says that she needs something to get around in. You know she smokes in the car and you want your car to stay new. Would you let her use the car until you get a license ? What would you do?

    EDIT:Bear in mind you have only known her for a couple of years

    If you trust her let her use the car but tell her she can't smoke in it.. Not even with the windows down. If you don't trust her then no, especially if you have only known her for a couple years.
  • dmpizza
    dmpizza Posts: 3,321 Member
    Tell her there are "insurance problems", and she cant drive it.

    I lost patience with smokers decades ago.
  • whitelaurel
    whitelaurel Posts: 162 Member
    I probably wouldn't if I were you. It sounds like you're kind of doubting her intentions or her character, if you have to say "I've only known her a couple years." And... If she all of a sudden needs something to get around in right after she finds out you have a car, then maybe she is suspicious. The smoking is just the icing on the cake, for me. Although it is a good justification for not letting her use it. Or, yeah, as somebody else said, "insurance problems," etc. etc. Besides, if you don't keep contact or see each other on a regular basis, then... no. A car is a big loan. Sounds like it could get messy, no? It doesn't sound like your relationship with her supports it.

    Edit: Besides, how are you going to get your driver's license if you don't have a car to practice in? I think you should train in your own car, since a) you have one and b) it's the one you're going to be driving for the foreseeable future, am I right?
  • Nope. I wouldn't let anyone borrow it. The School of Hard Knocks taught me this. Telling her there are insurance problems might make it easier for you both.
  • Amy62575
    Amy62575 Posts: 422 Member
    EDIT:Bear in mind you have only known her for a couple of years

    You've only known your mother for a couple of years?

    I would let her use it with the warning that she better not smoke in it. It's yours and she should respect your wishes or she can find her own ride :smile:
  • toaster6
    toaster6 Posts: 703 Member
    Personally, I never loan anything I'm not okay with: a) not getting back in the exact condition I loaned it out in -or- b) not getting back at all. It's not worth the aggravation.
  • lseed87
    lseed87 Posts: 1,105 Member
    Maybe in some ways but i do see the points. If you don't know her that well and don't want the car smelling like smoke then i wouldn't do it. Plus it would be in your name and she most likely wouldn't be on it?
  • marekdds
    marekdds Posts: 2,233 Member
    Not selfish at all. I wouldn't do it. Too big a risk. Where has she been? Certainly not helping you. But that's just me, hard for someone to gain my trust. Good luck w/ your decision. Do you know people, who know her, you could ask?
  • Never a lender nor a borrower be
  • SmartAlec03211988
    SmartAlec03211988 Posts: 1,896 Member
    No, it's not selfish to want to keep your own personal possessions to yourself.
  • apg2302
    apg2302 Posts: 667
    Hell no! It's your car, and if you don't want the quite frankly disgusting smell of smoke in it then you're not selfish at all!
  • kmoore02
    kmoore02 Posts: 167 Member
    Mother or not, you have only known her a couple of years and that's not enough to trust someone with a valuable possession. If they can't understand, then they weren't thinking of YOU anyway!
  • Davina_JH
    Davina_JH Posts: 473 Member
    Depends what she smoked in the car :smokin:
  • :noway:
  • mikey1976
    mikey1976 Posts: 1,005 Member
    Hell no! It's your car, and if you don't want the quite frankly disgusting smell of smoke in it then you're not selfish at all!
    this goes for me to. think of its brand new no way i would want to drive it first before letting some one else
  • reasnableblonde
    reasnableblonde Posts: 212 Member
    Nope.

    She didn't raise you. You owe her nothing.
  • If you won a brand new car from a text messaging contest but you do not have a drivers license (of course you are over 21). You leave the car in your parking space while you attempt to get your license. Your mother contacts you and says that she needs something to get around in. You know she smokes in the car and you want your car to stay new. Would you let her use the car until you get a license ? What would you do?

    EDIT:Bear in mind you have only known her for a couple of years

    Can she afford to replace it?
    Can YOU afford to replace it?

    If either of these answers are 'no,' then that's your answer.
  • HopefulLeigh
    HopefulLeigh Posts: 363 Member
    If you won a brand new car from a text messaging contest but you do not have a drivers license (of course you are over 21). You leave the car in your parking space while you attempt to get your license. Your mother contacts you and says that she needs something to get around in. You know she smokes in the car and you want your car to stay new. Would you let her use the car until you get a license ? What would you do?

    EDIT:Bear in mind you have only known her for a couple of years

    I would claim insurance issues. I think it's weird that your mother, who you've only known for a few years, would call her child for a literal free ride. It sends up too many red flags for me.
  • NYactor1
    NYactor1 Posts: 9,642 Member
    The privilege / ability to drive a brand new car is awesome. Don't ruin it by letting her potentially abuse it. My vote: NO!
  • links_slayer
    links_slayer Posts: 1,151 Member
    EDIT:Bear in mind you have only known her for a couple of years

    You've only known your mother for a couple of years?

    yeah....let's hear the story behind this.

    something's not adding up.
  • BrettPGH
    BrettPGH Posts: 4,716 Member
    Won a car texting but has no license and mom who abandoned her wants to smoke in it.

    All I know is that this is a fascinating story... good luck to you!
  • lunnay
    lunnay Posts: 65 Member
    My brother borrowed my car for a few weeks, and he was very good about not smoking in the car, but unfortunately smokers just smoke before getting in the car and the smell is still in there. :( As someone who really really dislikes smoke, it bothered me. But I've known my brother forever, and trust him completely, I wouldn't let someone I met two years ago borrow my brand new car.
  • sally_jeffswife
    sally_jeffswife Posts: 766 Member
    I would tell her she can use it only if you can ride along with her when she takes it anywhere cuz its a very brand new vehicle and if she doesn't smoke in the car.
  • TheRealParisLove
    TheRealParisLove Posts: 1,907 Member
    Nope. Personally. I'd just sell the car and be done with the whole thing.
  • sunsnstatheart
    sunsnstatheart Posts: 2,544 Member
    No. I'm not lending my car out, especially to someone I know would smoke in it
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
    If you won a brand new car from a text messaging contest but you do not have a drivers license (of course you are over 21). You leave the car in your parking space while you attempt to get your license. Your mother contacts you and says that she needs something to get around in. You know she smokes in the car and you want your car to stay new. Would you let her use the car until you get a license ? What would you do?

    EDIT:Bear in mind you have only known her for a couple of years

    I'd go get my license that week. Problem solved. Plus, you probably don't have insurance if you don't have a license.
  • artickb22
    artickb22 Posts: 411 Member
    I don't share well with others when it comes to this kinda stuff myself, call me selfish but I'd rather not lose a friendship or family members love due to me spazzing out on them if they disrespected me. Better to just keep things simple in my opinion.
  • HopefulLeigh
    HopefulLeigh Posts: 363 Member
    If you won a brand new car from a text messaging contest but you do not have a drivers license (of course you are over 21). You leave the car in your parking space while you attempt to get your license. Your mother contacts you and says that she needs something to get around in. You know she smokes in the car and you want your car to stay new. Would you let her use the car until you get a license ? What would you do?

    EDIT:Bear in mind you have only known her for a couple of years

    I'd go get my license that week. Problem solved. Plus, you probably don't have insurance if you don't have a license.

    That's a pretty good point. The car probably isn't even legal to drive at the moment. Which, of course, rounds right back to the "no." answer.
  • Crankstr
    Crankstr Posts: 3,958 Member
    EDIT:Bear in mind you have only known her for a couple of years

    You've only known your mother for a couple of years?

    yeah....let's hear the story behind this.

    something's not adding up.

    curious and curiouser