RANT about the "skinny fat" body shaming on here.

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peachfigs
peachfigs Posts: 831 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
I weigh 135lbs. I'm very short at 5'1. My clothes size is a 6-8 depending on the store. In my clothes, I look like a healthy woman and no one is any wiser about the fact that I have a huge health problem!

I can't walk up a flight of stairs without feeling like I'm going to vomit.

At 18, I actually developed kidney stones because all I used to drink was pepsi, coke, and red bull. I also developed heart palpitations and had to have my heart monitored.

Diabetes runs in my family, and my doctor has said I have a large amount of visceral and abdominal fat, and that I need to get healthier.

However, from the outside, and with my clothes on, I look okay! Put me in a bikini, and you can see that I have a very high amount of body fat for someone my weight and height (I'm only 5'1). I am generally what is referred to as SKINNY FAT.

I was really annoyed when I read a post on here, titled "what does skinny fat look like?" and a lot of the comments were saying how "eww" and "yuck" it was, and how skinny fat people look "okay clothes but rubbish naked", and that its "worse than being fat."

Sure, I'm working very hard to change my skinny fat body. It's not desireable or healthy for me to be this way. But just because someone does not LOOK like they are "fat" or "obese", does NOT MEAN they don't have a problem!

I posted my picture and my experience, and a lot of people said I have self esteem issues.

Are you really saying that because my body is not visibly what society thinks of as "overweight", that I have mental issues instead? That I have a psychological problem or body dysmorphia? That is so discouraging, negative, and extremely annoying.

Sorry for the rant guys -- but I think people need to STOP judging others by what they look like, and realise that health and weight issues come in all different shapes and sizes. I joined MFP for encouragement and support, and I'm sick of being told I'm "crazy" or "nuts" just because I don't weigh a few hundred pounds more. I'm sick of it being insinuated that my struggle is irrelevant just because my body looks deceivingly healthy in clothes. Everyone is on their own journey! Respect that.
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Replies

  • BGM325
    BGM325 Posts: 78
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    You'd think THIS place would be a tad bit more supportive and way less critical but nope. There's always an @$$ in the bunch and they're a magnet for MORE @$$3$!! You flip them the bird and continue on your merry way. I know it's VERY cliche but it's the truth....the meanies are usually the ones that concentrate on what's wrong with others so they won't have to face how FKD up they are. It's very easy to point fingers and be critical when you're hiding behind a computer and have the option of hiding what you look like. Don't let them get to you!!!! :smile:
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    :flowerforyou:
  • MochaMixAZ
    MochaMixAZ Posts: 844 Member
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    I'm sick of it being insinuated that my struggle is irrelevant just because my body looks deceivingly healthy in clothes. Everyone is on their own journey! Respect that.

    Mass respect in affect! Thank you for posting and sharing your story!
  • kkmonroe79
    kkmonroe79 Posts: 71 Member
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    :heart:
  • gela5
    gela5 Posts: 6 Member
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    I'm with you all the way!!!!
  • peachfigs
    peachfigs Posts: 831 Member
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    You'd think THIS place would be a tad bit more supportive and way less critical but nope. There's always an @$$ in the bunch and they're a magnet for MORE @$$3$!! You flip them the bird and continue on your merry way. I know it's VERY cliche but it's the truth....the meanies are usually the ones that concentrate on what's wrong with others so they won't have to face how FKD up they are. It's very easy to point fingers and be critical when you're hiding behind a computer and have the option of hiding what you look like. Don't let them get to you!!!! :smile:

    thank you! :flowerforyou:
  • AZKristi
    AZKristi Posts: 1,801 Member
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    You are not alone. Experts estimate that approximately 30% of people with normal BMI have significant health problems related to excess body fat. You are working to improve your health, and that is all that matters. As long as your doctor is not concerned that you are trying to reduce body fat, I wouldn't pay any attention to what a bunch of people on MFP think.
  • Greenrun99
    Greenrun99 Posts: 2,065 Member
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    Sorry for the rant guys -- but I think people need to STOP judging others by what they look like, and realise that health and weight issues come in all different shapes and sizes.

    Wishful thinking, this has been going on forever and will never stop. We judge people on how you look everyday even if you don't mean to, you do. Its just the world.

    Enjoyed reading it though. If anything this is one of the bigger reasons to not under eat what your body needs.. does nothing but build up your BF%.
  • KenosFeoh
    KenosFeoh Posts: 1,837 Member
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    Use the ignore options; you can make mean people disappear.
  • jacquirich
    jacquirich Posts: 105 Member
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    I am a former fat fat, now a looking normal fat, and I agree with you, and support your fight to get healthy
  • peachfigs
    peachfigs Posts: 831 Member
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    Sorry for the rant guys -- but I think people need to STOP judging others by what they look like, and realise that health and weight issues come in all different shapes and sizes.

    Wishful thinking, this has been going on forever and will never stop. We judge people on how you look everyday even if you don't mean to, you do. Its just the world.

    Enjoyed reading it though.

    You're totally right! But isn't it supposed to be a safe haven here? :wink:
  • babydiego87
    babydiego87 Posts: 905 Member
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    Use the ignore options; you can make mean people disappear.
    nah, they should just stop making unnecessary comments.
  • crystalflame
    crystalflame Posts: 1,049 Member
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    I saw your photos, and you looked gorgeous. Clothes or no clothes, you look great. But you're right, that doesn't mean you're healthy, and it's good you're on here to get in shape and take care of yourself. I think "skinny fat" in general is a poorly used, misunderstood term - too many people think it's being used to insult people who are thin but not muscular rather than describing a serious medical condition. Best of luck to you :flowerforyou:
  • khall86790
    khall86790 Posts: 1,100 Member
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    To be honest, people will do/say whatever makes them feel better about their own predicament. Particularly when it comes to a sensitive issue like weight.
    If someone who is overweight needs to makes themselves feel better by telling themselves skinny people are also fat then it defeats the whole point of why they are here. Which is to lose weight/improve their fitness.
    The same goes for skinny people slamming people who are overweight... except that isn't acceptable and wouldn't be tolerated on these boards but it happens a lot in real life.

    It's a shame there is such a double standard! Personally, I've been watching the thread with interest at how people can say someone who is 135lbs is "fat", or how you can call someone fat because of their body fat %. I think it's down to how the individual wants to look and how comfortable they feel with their body. I don't see why we need to constantly judge and put each other down!
  • MochaMixAZ
    MochaMixAZ Posts: 844 Member
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    You're totally right! But isn't it supposed to be a safe haven here? :wink:

    Unfortunately, no.... it's just a gathering place and a tool. One would HOPE people could exercise tolerance as well as their other muscles, but just like the real world... jerks abound. Of course with your wink, you probably already know that. LOL My sarcasm-font-reading ability is on the fritz as usual.
  • peachfigs
    peachfigs Posts: 831 Member
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    You're totally right! But isn't it supposed to be a safe haven here? :wink:

    Unfortunately, no.... it's just a gathering place and a tool. One would HOPE people could exercise tolerance as well as their other muscles, but just like the real world... jerks abound. Of course with your wink, you probably already know that. LOL My sarcasm-font-reading ability is on the fritz as usual.

    LOL, you're right.


    What annoys me the most is being told I'm imagining it, or that it's all in my head. That's pretty damaging! I don't have an eating disorder or body dysmorphia or any of that. I'm just trying to get healthier, like everyone else, and we're all starting at different points!
  • fbmandy55
    fbmandy55 Posts: 5,263 Member
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    Not quiet. People are generally nice HERE than on Bodybuilding.com where people will intentionally harrass you for being fat/ugly/whatever but as with internet, and real life, there are always D!cks.
  • jiie
    jiie Posts: 2
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    seriously i'm the same people say oh you're not fat but they don't know what i look like without clothes & also the underlying health problems. people who say people are beautiful all shapes and sizes but then they look down on those who are skinny fat. i'm 5'2 by the way when i wear clothes u cant tell thats because i wear outfits that dont show off my waist .

    I understand what you feel
  • WendyTerry420
    WendyTerry420 Posts: 13,274 Member
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    Use the ignore options; you can make mean people disappear.
    nah, they should just stop making unnecessary comments.

    Like yours?
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    You're totally right! But isn't it supposed to be a safe haven here? :wink:

    Unfortunately, no.... it's just a gathering place and a tool. One would HOPE people could exercise tolerance as well as their other muscles, but just like the real world... jerks abound. Of course with your wink, you probably already know that. LOL My sarcasm-font-reading ability is on the fritz as usual.

    LOL, you're right.


    What annoys me the most is being told I'm imagining it, or that it's all in my head. That's pretty damaging! I don't have an eating disorder or body dysmorphia or any of that. I'm just trying to get healthier, like everyone else, and we're all starting at different points!

    No one can diagnose a person as having a mental health problem based on the information you provided. Obviously anyone that says that is over reacting, just ignore that. You also got a lot of compliments and support. And sometimes we all misunderstand one another. But, people do go way overboard on here with trying to diagnose people with things (sometimes even imaginary or made of things).

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