I don't want to be "that girl".
NYCNika
Posts: 611 Member
You know, the one that keeps going on about calories and diet when out with friends for dinner. I used to find it incredibly annoying, and now that I am making this progress and am pretty obsessed with fitness, eating right and all that, it will be tough.
I need to go out, eat whatever I will be eating, have a drink and NOT talk about any of this stuff unless asked a specific question. This Sat. going out to a restaurant that is less than healthy (hot pot) with a bunch of people and it will be a challenge. My goal is to look like I'm not trying at all, like I'm my old careless self.
I need to go out, eat whatever I will be eating, have a drink and NOT talk about any of this stuff unless asked a specific question. This Sat. going out to a restaurant that is less than healthy (hot pot) with a bunch of people and it will be a challenge. My goal is to look like I'm not trying at all, like I'm my old careless self.
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When I know I'm going out an where I am going, I check out the menu online before hand, and kind of plan out what i will eat. then for that day since i have an aprrox count for what i will need that night, I plan the rest of the day around that. lighter lunch, exercise in the am, whatever it takes to make sure i dont go over.0
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But...friends and family should be supportive too though.. I know what you're saying because I find that I'm constantly talking about this as well. If it's a big part of your life now, then of course it will come up. I do it a lot because it's what I have going on and it's important to me.0
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I wish more restaurants would post their nutritional information on line. I always feel like a big dork asking for the 'nutritional menu'. At one local restaurant it's a freaking BINDER!0
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See if they will fax a copy of it to you or ask them if they have a digital version, you might be surprised. Once you have the nutritional info, scan it (or save it) to a PDF and either put it online or email it to yourself and download it to your smartphone. All my "regulars" are on my blog, which I manage from my phone (when on the go) so I have all my favorite places PDF's already there.0
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It is not the kind of place that has nutritional menu. It is Chinese hot pot. You get broth in a boiling pot (has good amount of fat in it) and than order raw stuff to put in to it and all of it is shared by your table. So other people order what they want at the table and no way to avoid fatty (and very delicious broth) that everything must be cooked in. But that is not the difficult part -- the tough part is having no clue how many calories is in it.
Same with other Chinese restaurants. Who can tell how many calories are in the hand pulled noodle with cumin lamb all in hot chili oil? No idea. A lot.
As far as support goes. My husband hears me talk about it all the time. Closest friends know. But friends that are not that close should not be subjected to this at dinner.0 -
I only order things I know I can safely estimate. Usually just a salad with no dressing or croutons--so basically just lettuce and a few slices of onions and cucumber. Even if I estimate the lettuce to be two cups and it's really three, that's a pretty negligible amount of calories. Fruit is also a pretty safe bet. Restaurants like Denny's, IHOP, Waffle House, etc. have fruit as a side on the menu. You can also order steamed veggies.
TL; DR: order simple things you can safely estimate.0 -
I have a hard time with this and some folks say I have "harshed their buzz" with my talk of calories and fitness. I try to keep it to myself but some days I just can't help it. This is why I have the MFP app on my phone now so I can quietly look at calories before placing my order in case the item I had picked out previously is no longer on the menu. :P0
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It is not the kind of place that has nutritional menu. It is Chinese hot pot. You get broth in a boiling pot (has good amount of fat in it) and than order raw stuff to put in to it and all of it is shared by your table. So other people order what they want at the table and no way to avoid fatty (and very delicious broth) that everything must be cooked in. But that is not the difficult part -- the tough part is having no clue how many calories is in it.
Same with other Chinese restaurants. Who can tell how many calories are in the hand pulled noodle with cumin lamb all in hot chili oil? No idea. A lot.
As far as support goes. My husband hears me talk about it all the time. Closest friends know. But friends that are not that close should not be subjected to this at dinner.
I can't imagine the broth having that much fat in it. Every hot pot I've had was a bone broth which is rather low in calories (and immensely good for your hair/skin/nails).
As for eating out at other asian restaurants, I'd guestimate the best you can and just eat healthy the rest of the day. You're not going to be able to get an exact count (even if you're making it at home) every time on everything, so do the best you can and don't fret. Enjoy the company.
Also, might help to eat before you go, something low calorie that is also very filling so you can spend more time socializing and not eating.0 -
That's ok because i'm that girl who doesn't go out to dinner with friends. :laugh:0
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lol I try not to talk about it in front of anyone either. Every time I mention calories, someone tries to get me to eat more food!0
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then don't be that girl.0
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This is really not a salad place. They won't have it. Ordering a salad in a Chinese hot pot place in Chinatown is ridiculous.
Things that go into the already deliciously fatty broth are mostly -- "supreme fatty beef", lamb shoulder, beef tripe, pork belly. and they melt even more fat into it. Sure, they have veggies, but they must go into the broth -- due to hygiene standards of such places, it would be unsafe to eat them otherwise.
And it is still my firm believe that if you go to a restaurant, you should get the thing restaurant is know for. I guess the only thing I can do is exercise and portion control and hope to just "break even" in calories for the day.
The thing with portion control -- I am successful at it because I measured food out before I put it on the plate -- so when the food is gone, the meal is over. Here, all this deliciousness will be piled on shared dishes right in front of me for hours.
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You know, the one that keeps going on about calories and diet when out with friends for dinner. I used to find it incredibly annoying, and now that I am making this progress and am pretty obsessed with fitness, eating right and all that, it will be tough.
I need to go out, eat whatever I will be eating, have a drink and NOT talk about any of this stuff unless asked a specific question. This Sat. going out to a restaurant that is less than healthy (hot pot) with a bunch of people and it will be a challenge. My goal is to look like I'm not trying at all, like I'm my old careless self.
I know the feel, OP. I am in the same boat. I've been making progress and I have been trying not to be obnoxious and preachy when people ask about my food choice, or my workout, or what have you. People are especially nosy because I am pregnant (for the record, not trying to lose weight, I eat a ton, and I eat good food. I lost weight at first but it's staying the same now, which is OK bc I am overweight). For me, I decide right away if I want my group outing to be indulgent or if I want to save any indulgences for another time when I am craving it more. From there I decide what I will eat ahead of time and I usually snack on some raw veggies (or your healthy snack of choice) before I go. Usually half my food goes uneaten, and if I picked a healthier choice at the restaurant I take it home for later. I am sure that when people do talk to me about my progress I look hypocritical, since I am still heavy, but I am feeling so much better and have so much more energy that I want to share!0 -
It is not the kind of place that has nutritional menu. It is Chinese hot pot. You get broth in a boiling pot (has good amount of fat in it) and than order raw stuff to put in to it and all of it is shared by your table. So other people order what they want at the table and no way to avoid fatty (and very delicious broth) that everything must be cooked in. But that is not the difficult part -- the tough part is having no clue how many calories is in it.
Same with other Chinese restaurants. Who can tell how many calories are in the hand pulled noodle with cumin lamb all in hot chili oil? No idea. A lot.
As far as support goes. My husband hears me talk about it all the time. Closest friends know. But friends that are not that close should not be subjected to this at dinner.
I would think Hot Pot is probably one of the healthiest ways you can go eating out at a restaurant with friends! While the broth my have some fat in it (i.e. oil), that's the only bad thing about the meal. Otherwise you're just eating lean meats, seafood, and vegetables. And it's easy to control how much you eat since it's all shared. Log a little extra oils for the meal, and just enjoy all the fresh foods.0 -
What's wrong with being "that girl"? Would you rather be one of the fat girls who howls and moans about her weight over four glasses of wine and a cheese platter?
The only reason people get annoyed with "that girl" is because she makes them feel guilty about their poor choices. But I'm not going to let THEIR guilt get in the way of MY success, or what makes me happy, which is fitness and proper nutrition. If others want to get irked over your success and being a good example, that's their prerogative, but personally, I'm sure as hell not going to let their piss-poor attitudes shame me back into my bad habits. I'm proud as hell to be "that girl"!0 -
Im her, but like one of the other posts said I check thier menu before hand online and ask when Im there whats the healthiest dish and go from there. I eat mostly the same things just in moderation if you want to keep the caloires down take your meal and cut it in half.so half the soup half a sandwich an example.You might be surprised that your full sooner and drink water instead of pop,tea so on. Good luck your health is important and others should find it inspiring losing wieght is difficult and time consuming but worth it.I tell everyone yes Im watching my calories and exercising because Im important.My body is a temple and I need to treat it better
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When I know I'm going out an where I am going, I check out the menu online before hand, and kind of plan out what i will eat. then for that day since i have an aprrox count for what i will need that night, I plan the rest of the day around that. lighter lunch, exercise in the am, whatever it takes to make sure i dont go over.
Agreed!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am doing that tonight! Plus before I leave to go out, I shovel in fruits and veggies so that I am half full when I go!0 -
You have to be obsessed about fitness and nutrition in a society that is obsessed with bad food. It's the only way to offset it. Friends and family who unintentionally sabotage you, constant fast food commercials on TV, McDonald's on every corner, and hectic schedules that make it difficult to eat well. It has to be at the forefront of our minds, especially if we are easily led astray. Yeah, you don't want to be "that girl" but I've found that people put me in that role just by being mindful of what I eat and working out a few times a week. It's not the norm to be healthy, it seems. Don't worry about it. Go have your yummy meal with your friends. Make sure you don't overdo it and just keep moving forward if you do.0
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What's wrong with being "that girl"? Would you rather be one of the fat girls who howls and moans about her weight over four glasses of wine and a cheese platter?
The only reason people get annoyed with "that girl" is because she makes them feel guilty about their poor choices. But I'm not going to let THEIR guilt get in the way of MY success, or what makes me happy, which is fitness and proper nutrition. If others want to get irked over your success and being a good example, that's their prerogative, but personally, I'm sure as hell not going to let their piss-poor attitudes shame me back into my bad habits. I'm proud as hell to be "that girl"!
haha. I love this.0 -
These are all great ideas! I went out with a friend on Friday, and read the menu ahead of time. It had the extra benefit of me not having to pull out my reading glasses at the table LOL!
I knew exactly what I was going to order, and made sure not to eat all of it. Had great leftovers today too!
I know some folks who actually portion out their meal as soon as they get it, but that is too much like "that girl!" ;-)
Good luck... and remember... one day of being "bad" won't kill you. You have to live a little too! Just watch your portions!0 -
One way to avoid being "that girl" is to just accept that there will be days every once in a while that you'll go over your calories. It's really not a big deal -- many people have had great success while having a weekly "cheat meal" or even "cheat day."
If you have a lifestyle in which you're going out to dinner or going to parties 5 days a week, then yes, you'll need to figure out a way to eat within your calories when eating out. But if this is a rare treat, just ENJOY IT. Eat well the rest of the week, get some exercise in, and when it comes time for your dinner out, just put some estimate into your log and have fun with your friends!0 -
If you like that kind of food eat it! Just maybe not as much as you did last time. I don't talk about watching my weight unless someone asks about it. I work at a place where our office was voted one of the Healthiest Places to Work in the city so everyone here eats very healthy. But when I'm out with my family or friends I still have a drink (only one) and might split a desert with someone if they are up for it. But this is a liftstyle change for me not a deprivation of certain foods. Just don't go crazy - that's my motto!0
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Okay so I am that girl... I don't talk about calories or working out much anymore, although believe me, I did as I was loosing 59lbs. The few select friends I have now understand and are very supportive of my lifestyle and usually ask me where I want to go or if a certain place has foods on the menu I can eat. Those that don't get it, I opt not to go.
When I go on vacation, they know I'm up before the rest of them getting a run or workout in and are okay with it. They poke and make fun of it in a jokingly manner... but are fully support it.
Definitely agree to check the menus and suggest places you know you can have something there. Your friends will completely understand 0 -
Good for you for trying to be considerate of your friends. I know everyone says friends and family have to be supportive but it doesn't mean I have to bore the crap out of them with my issues, food related or not. If it comes up though... 0
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I love the hot pot style meals. The broth is delicious, the meats are lean and the vegies are fresh. No Sauce to calculate. One of the healthier ways to go for a meal. Especially if you don't add in any noodles. And like other posters have said, don't stress one meal. Watch your portions and have fun.0
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When I know I'm going out an where I am going, I check out the menu online before hand, and kind of plan out what i will eat. then for that day since i have an aprrox count for what i will need that night, I plan the rest of the day around that. lighter lunch, exercise in the am, whatever it takes to make sure i dont go over.
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What I do too, but also take my plate, cut it in half, and only eat one half of what is on the plate too.0 -
Hot pot is one of those things where you can choose what you actually eat. I doubt that eating some of the broth that had fatty stuff put into it on one day will affect your fitness in the long run.0
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Good for you for trying to be considerate of your friends. I know everyone says friends and family have to be supportive but it doesn't mean I have to bore the crap out of them with my issues, food related or not. If it comes up though...
Yes, there is a BIG difference between being "that girl" who is so tediously dull and sucks the fun out of every situation by blathering on about calories and restrictions and limitations and exercise and doesn't seem to have an interesting non-calorie-related thought, and being someone who is acutely aware of what they want to eat and not eat, and that they want to fit in exercise even on vacation, but is still able to participate in non-calorie-related conversations and activities.
It's one thing to ask the waiter about nutrition, or box up half your food to start, and friends/family should be supportive of this. But it's another to be so consumed with nutrition and calories as to be a boring and tedious dinner companion. In essence--do whatever you want to do, but just keep it to yourself!0 -
I checked a few surces, and none of them mention all this fat in the broth.
Here are a couple of ideas for you: http://www.healthydiningfinder.com/restaurant/littlsheep
My experience is that people are less likely to notice what I am eating when we share like this.0 -
Yeah... I came to the conclusion that I am that girl.. The "how many calories does it have?" girl, or the "do you know how much salt that has?!" But I have yet to become a hermit. What I have done is workout what is good to eat at certain places should I go out with my friends. If there a smaller portion meals available I will order that. My friends may give me that awkward side glance, but when they leave most their food and they are all full and bloated, I still have room for dessert!... Should I incorporate it into my meal. It's hard when you feel that your friends and family don't support you and you feel that you are on your own, but that should show them how dedicated you are and how serious you are about your health and they should admire you for that.0
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