being looked down upon

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Replies

  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    They sure do and it doesnt matter. Oh, and when you lose weight youll get the double whammy of now they treat you better. Remember humans are shallow a--holes and you are far superior than 99% of them. The best revenge is success and happiness.
  • kaliso
    kaliso Posts: 42 Member
    Focus on who you are as a person and who cares what people think of you.

    agreed.
  • CrazyTrackLady
    CrazyTrackLady Posts: 1,337 Member
    Absolutely. The reality of the world is that attractive people are treated better, and if you're overweight you would definitely be more attractive to be at a more healthy weight. Some people try to get lots of money or wear designer clothes try to become really funny or great at dancing or a good guitar player so that others will like them more... but fitness and health is so great because not only do you look better but you FEEL better so you no longer care so much what people think of you and you can get on with being who YOU want to be.

    Gee, so I guess all those unattractive, yet thin people just can't win for anything, huh?
  • Admiral_Derp
    Admiral_Derp Posts: 866 Member
    It's not about attractive/unattractive, fat/thin, whatever. People will find a hundred different reasons to look down on whoever is convenient at the moment they feel a need to feel superior to someone else. At the end of the day what you have to ask yourself is, "Does it really matter?" People come and go, and along with them go their opinions about you. Live your life for you, and for the benefit of the people that you care about, or are able to help, and let the opinions of others fall by the wayside.
  • stonerollin42
    stonerollin42 Posts: 7 Member
    do you guys sometime feel looked down upon because of your weight? like people feel bad for you in a way. im 5'7 273 lbs and im morbidley obese. it feels that people look down on me because im obese. does anybody else feel that way or is it just me being paranoid?

    It's really really reaaaallllllyyyy easy to feel this way-even when it's absurd. When I try to eat healthy in public, a nasty little voice in the back of my head says, "look at the fat girl eating a salad." Same thing when going to the gym.

    The thing is, everyone has insecurities; there are so many countless things to worry about. I've spent the vast majority of my life worrying about people judging me for my weight. When I found out that some people feel judged for things like having a big nose or tiny ears, etc, I was just dumbstruck. They were at perfectly healthy weights! Why weren't their lives blissful and judgement free?!

    So now I just smile at people. They don't know your struggle. And you don't know theirs. And if they judge you, well, how sad for them. I'd hate for my struggle to be being a really shi**y person.
  • yksdoris
    yksdoris Posts: 327 Member
    Bill Clinton was overweight....

    while being president or at the time he was elected? Also, really: Clinton? as compared to, say, Rush Limbaugh or Roger Moore?


    Dude they were never presidents.

    exactly. Name ONE obese president? One that was obese at the time they were elected. Bat**** crazy, can be tolerated, apparently, but not obese.
  • transvenouspacer
    transvenouspacer Posts: 182 Member
    People will look down on you for any reason they can perceive or imagine. For me, a "healthy" weight seems like an unattainable goal, but I'm more worried about how I feel than whether or not I make others uncomfortable.

    Exactly. It's human nature to look down on others. Doesn't matter if it's because they think they're smarter, taller, have better looking eyebrows, whatever. People have to find something to make them feel that they're better than someone else. Don't worry about it. Just focus on you.
  • kaseysospacey
    kaseysospacey Posts: 499 Member
    Bill Clinton was overweight....

    while being president or at the time he was elected? Also, really: Clinton? as compared to, say, Rush Limbaugh or Roger Moore?


    Dude they were never presidents.

    exactly. Name ONE obese president? One that was obese at the time they were elected. Bat**** crazy, can be tolerated, apparently, but not obese.

    Taft (bmi of 42.3) Cleveland (34.6) McKinley (31.3) Taylor (30.2) and Teddy Rooselvelt (30.2). Clinton was overweight at 28.3
  • CrystalDreams
    CrystalDreams Posts: 418 Member
    Ive been teased for my weight. I have had people doubt my ability to preform tasks due to me being 'out of shape'. I have had people judge my eating. I let all of this got to me and led to a phobia of eating in public and thinking i was pathetic and out of shape. Now i just giggle inside because even though i weight more than most girls I am basically a flesh colored hulk and could easily chase them down. I eat now because i know my body needs food, and i ignore the people staring. Let them judge. They just don't want to look at themselves and their faults so they must put everyone around them.
  • sdereski
    sdereski Posts: 3,406 Member
    I think we have all felt that way at one time or another - it is our own insecurities. My first thought whenever I see a larger individual working out in any way (walking, running, cycling, or at the gym) is "right on! good for them!" :happy:
  • witchy_wife
    witchy_wife Posts: 792 Member
    I've actually become one of those that look down upon those who are overweight. Sad as that may seem.

    I was overweight for 20 years, so it's not like I don't know what it's like at all, but having lost all my weight & worked hard at getting there...I've become someone who sees a fat person and actually thinks "OMG they could try eating a bit better" (most of the time I see larger people eating some horrid junk from the take away shops along my way of walking cause it's a major shopping strip) and I kinda just think back & go...that was me once, I did it..... why can't they? Why are they shoving that extra bit of deep fried chicken into their body? Why are they waiting for the bus rather than walking those 2 stops I know they will get off at later? (yeah I know where most of them get on & off cause I used to catch the bus further than they did...till I started walking the 3km there instead)

    Yep I look down upon fat people.... perhaps that is what is needed in a way. I now know I look great.... an I show it off. I want people to look at me..... before I wanted to hide along with all the other fat people. I kinda despise fat now, I lived with it for over half my life, it ruled what I did. So I guess looking down upon others that allow the same.... well I guess it's just nature.

    Everyone looks down upon something or someone, anyone who says different....is a liar.

    Yep, I look down on people who look down on people for being overweight.
  • ApexLeader
    ApexLeader Posts: 580 Member
    it is just a fact of life. even if everyone looked the same people would still find ways to band together and be critical of other people's appearances.

    but you shouldn't care. just do your thing (keep losing weight for you and your health and don't worry what others think).

    by the way. i was at the gym yesterday and saw a guy that was fairly overweight doing sprints for 20 minutes and i was extremely impressed by his effort. he might have looked at me and assumed i judged him for his weight, but i really only judged him by his effort (which was fantastic)
  • CrystalDreams
    CrystalDreams Posts: 418 Member
    Bill Clinton was overweight....

    while being president or at the time he was elected? Also, really: Clinton? as compared to, say, Rush Limbaugh or Roger Moore?


    Dude they were never presidents.

    exactly. Name ONE obese president? One that was obese at the time they were elected. Bat**** crazy, can be tolerated, apparently, but not obese.

    Taft (bmi of 42.3) Cleveland (34.6) McKinley (31.3) Taylor (30.2) and Teddy Rooselvelt (30.2). Clinton was overweight at 28.3

    President William Taft was morbidly obese and got stuck in the white house bath tub.
  • yksdoris
    yksdoris Posts: 327 Member
    Bill Clinton was overweight....

    while being president or at the time he was elected? Also, really: Clinton? as compared to, say, Rush Limbaugh or Roger Moore?


    Dude they were never presidents.

    exactly. Name ONE obese president? One that was obese at the time they were elected. Bat**** crazy, can be tolerated, apparently, but not obese.

    Taft (bmi of 42.3) Cleveland (34.6) McKinley (31.3) Taylor (30.2) and Teddy Rooselvelt (30.2). Clinton was overweight at 28.3

    And the common denominator of all presidents who had a BMI over 30 is that they were presidents before TV became commonly used and the media exploded.

    though, again, Clinton at 28.3 when he was elected? strange, though I can't find any other numbers online either.
  • Selfish people who are full of themselves and think they are entitled to do and say whatever they want are one of my biggest pet peeves. I find it very sad that some people feel the need to resort to making others feel bad so they can feel better...

    Anywho,... the main point I really wanted to make here is that when I see overweight people at the gym, I feel very proud for them and am inspired by their efforts no matter how bog or little. I also hope that THEY aren't the ones looking down on ME. Maybe they think it is easy for me? Or that i don't need to be there cause I am already pretty small? What I really hope is that when overweight people look at me they also feel inspired and that they realize that I have worked really hard to get where I am and that they can reach their goals too as long as they stick with it!

    We all have insecurities, but at least when we are aware of them we can work together to overcome them!
  • Reading things like this absolutely breaks my heart. I've been plagued with an inferiority complex for years and it's left me battling depression and anxiety.

    My darling, it's human nature unfortunately. Ignorant (read:stupid) people will find your one weakness/ flaw/ imperfection/ vulnerability and they will exploit it and use it to bully you in whatever manner they see fit. That's just how discrimination works.

    You can never, ever, ever waste your time trying to change the opinions of others because their 'opinion' is actually a judgement. They don't know you, what you've achieved, what you've been through, what challenges you face every single day of your life. You must accept that if they judge you then that's their problem and most definitely not yours!

    F**k them. Life's too short. If I ever think someone is smirking at me these days at the gym I just think to myself 'I may be fat but I've had better looking s**ts than you!'

    It always does the trick.
  • icimani
    icimani Posts: 1,454 Member
    I've actually become one of those that look down upon those who are overweight. Sad as that may seem.

    I was overweight for 20 years, so it's not like I don't know what it's like at all, but having lost all my weight & worked hard at getting there...I've become someone who sees a fat person and actually thinks "OMG they could try eating a bit better"


    Yes - that's very sad. And unfortunately, very common. A LOT of people who've lost a lot of weight are even more sanctimonious than people whov'e quite smoking!
  • HJMAYES
    HJMAYES Posts: 72 Member
    No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

    ^^^This
  • _Timmeh_
    _Timmeh_ Posts: 2,096 Member
    Yes but only because I am short.
  • otterish
    otterish Posts: 50 Member
    do you guys sometime feel looked down upon because of your weight? like people feel bad for you in a way.

    I don't know. I'm too busy being awesome to notice if people are.

    ^^^ This.
    Also, if you are hygenic and wearing clothes that fit, your weight is basically nobody's business.
  • BeeElMarvin
    BeeElMarvin Posts: 2,086 Member
    do you guys sometime feel looked down upon because of your weight? like people feel bad for you in a way. im 5'7 273 lbs and im morbidley obese. it feels that people look down on me because im obese. does anybody else feel that way or is it just me being paranoid?

    it's you.... not them.
  • HJMAYES
    HJMAYES Posts: 72 Member
    No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

    ^^^This
  • thrld
    thrld Posts: 610 Member
    Do people say stupid things about your size/weight/height/age/gender/occupation/education/fitness level/hairstyle/taste in music? Probably.
    But stupid people say stupid things to everyone. Don't assume that the stupid speakers are voicing the opinons of the world (they are not.). Tell yourself "When it comes to me --other people are wrong almost all the time, while I am right almost all the time." Because it's true.
    And don't assume your self fears, or your insecurities are obvious to others or despised by others. Be yourself, be comfortable with yourself -- because that is the opinon that matters.
  • Lt_Starbuck
    Lt_Starbuck Posts: 576 Member
    You're focusing (dwelling) on the wrong thing. Focus on the revolution happening in your heart and leave these painful negative things in the past. It's a time and spirit suck. Dont waste time on this stuff.

    Revolution! Dont miss it!
  • Maridar
    Maridar Posts: 164 Member
    If a person is slightly overweight that is OK with me, I am overweight and working on it now. If someone is morbidly obese, very big in other words, I tend to look down upon them, honestly, although I am myself not perfect at all. I just think can't you control your eating? stop eating junk, or that a person has issues and comforts him/herself with food. I know it may be cruel but many people would look great if they lost weight...
  • berthabunny
    berthabunny Posts: 251 Member
    I feel looked-down upon all the time, and typically I feel that way because of myself... If you're at the gym and feel that way, don't, because I'm 100lbs lighter than you and I would feel proud of you for working on yourself - but you gotta do it for yourself. If you're doing it for them, they've already won. You gotta do you.

    ^^ This, especially the part about being proud of you :smile:
  • AuddAlise
    AuddAlise Posts: 723 Member
    No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

    ^^THIS! I would never look down on your for eating right and exercising.
  • cuterbee
    cuterbee Posts: 545
    The thing is, it's 99% about mental attitude. When I told my nephews and nieces that I was always embarrassed for them to have a fat uncle. Pretty much all of them said 'we never thought of you like that way' or 'thing was that you were always there for us'. We often feel ashamed that we get big and it makes things in life hard and then we probably comfort eat. People's perceptions are often quite different to our own.

    You're right, most of it just exists in our own heads. :flowerforyou: The 1% of people who actually would look down on any of us for this (or possessions, or wealth, a job, clothing...and so on) are people who (in my opinion) are broken and must pull down others to feel good about themselves.
  • 52in13
    52in13 Posts: 38 Member
    I am 5'4" and 234 lbs. I feel like I am looked down on a lot. You are not alone. Some people do judge, but I think we are our harshest critics. Try not to take it to heart, but also remember who the mean people are when you reach your goal weight.
  • Kimdbro
    Kimdbro Posts: 922 Member
    Yes. I myself have been fat and thin and one thing I really noticed the last time I had trimmed down substancialy was that people looked me in the eye, smiled and were friendly, not something I experience as a fat person. That being said, there's a lot of confidence at issue here.... when I was strong and fit and thin I was confident, not so much as a fat person. I often wonder if some of how we feel we are treated is also based somewhat on what we put out there.

    This is what Tyra Banks discovered when she did the fat suit challenge. There is definitely a difference in how people are treated.

    http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/BeautySecrets/story?id=1280787