Low Self-Esteem

Since I've started this journey I now workout regularly my only problem is running. I used to be a D1 college athlete but when I stopped playing I let my weight go and now I hate running in front of other people because everyone else there just looks so perfect!!!

Replies

  • julialou1979
    julialou1979 Posts: 54 Member
    Forget about them - even if someone is paying enough attention and judgmental enough to think they are hotter, what difference does it really make to your health? Remember, strangers won't take care of you when you are sick, nor will their opinions actually impact on your journey. You are the only one who matters here, and you need to take care of yourself!
  • I do know that but at 19 its hard to understand that when everyone around you working out is perfect and your the only imperfection....
  • labellecanuck
    labellecanuck Posts: 105 Member
    Unless your running partner is Usain Bolt, they're not even close to perfect. You can choose not to run because of insecurity. Or you can put on your headphones, get in the zone, and be the person that other people see out on the road and wish they had the courage to be.
  • I know and I got out there today felt a little uneasy but I did it I just don't like being the odd ball out
  • julialou1979
    julialou1979 Posts: 54 Member
    Pshaw - perfect is relative and you're only looking at one aspect. Who knows what goes on in their world - everyone has struggles and challenges and things that they suck at. You just happen to be working on improving something, which means you are exposing yourself. But that is AWESOME! In the um, like, 14 years since I was 19 I have learned to never ever judge people and make assumptions about perfection or superiority. I have watched so many folks, big and small, meet their demons and find ways to overcome. Okay, yes, sometimes I still have moments of running next to a really fit girl on a treadmill and think 'man, my butt is probably got sooooo much more bounce going on than hers'. But then I remind myself that it doesn't actually mean anything but that. So yes, true, my butt is more jiggly. But for all I know she's got a bum kidney, or a whiny baby, or a crappy job, or a number of other things I don't know about. I know it's hard when first getting back in there, but what is the alternative?
  • julialou1979
    julialou1979 Posts: 54 Member
    Here's a big secret: Everyone thinks that they are the odd ball out sometime. It's universal. So don't let it get you down.
  • Focus on you, that's all you gotta do. Encourage someone else who looks like they're struggling, makes both of ya feel better.
  • Here's a big secret: Everyone thinks that they are the odd ball out sometime. It's universal. So don't let it get you down.

    Very true!
  • matt2442
    matt2442 Posts: 1,259 Member
    If you dont have confidence, you won't succeed at too much, I've learned. that being said, be humble, dont let others bring you down and dont think that everyone is looking at you in a weird way. just focus on you and things will fall into place at some point
  • sjanes9
    sjanes9 Posts: 19 Member
    Well said. What you're facing isn't easy. Good luck with your journey and I hope you find the courage to do what it says below. Sending good vibes your way.
    Unless your running partner is Usain Bolt, they're not even close to perfect. You can choose not to run because of insecurity. Or you can put on your headphones, get in the zone, and be the person that other people see out on the road and wish they had the courage to be.
  • okcat4
    okcat4 Posts: 224 Member
    I know how you feel, I was "transmitting" my insecurities to other. I just knew they were thinking evil things about me. But then I realized they were probably doing the same or worried about their underwear bunching up or budgets or what ever and actually did nt notice me. Besides At least I was up and moving... not gracefully, swiftly or with any dignity whatsoever, but I was doing it, so to heck with "Them"

    THink back to the days you were learning to be a D1 athlete. You had a lot to learn and develop, like now. DID it once, do it again!
  • uwdawg07
    uwdawg07 Posts: 372 Member
    Honestly, people will look at you - and they will be thinking "good for her!"

    You are doing something awesome for yourself, and others see you being healthy and active, caring about yourself, being awesome, and they think nothing more of it.

    Keep rockin' it out and be proud of what you're doing!!!
  • thoroneil
    thoroneil Posts: 96 Member
    Until you can get used to running take a dog.. and when a car gets ready to pass look at dog.. that was whay I did and now I just run
  • girl you are working on you don't be worried about the others....you may be surprised by people i read a blog on here once and its changed everything for me....i felt like the one everyone was staring at and watching i pretty much wanted to hide


    not sure who wrote it but i have it saved on my computer and i read it from time to time

    Hey, Fat Girl.


    Yes, you. The one feigning to not see me when we cross paths on the running track. The one not even wearing sports gear, breathing heavy. You’re slow, you breathe hard and your efforts at moving forward make you cringe.

    You cling shyly to the furthest corridor, sometimes making larger loops on the gravel ring by the track just so you’re not on it. You sweat so much that your hair is all wet. You rarely stay for more than 20 minutes at a time, and you look exhausted when you leave to go back home. You never talk to anyone. I’ve got something I’d like to say to you.

    You are awesome.

    If you’d look me in the eye only for an instant, you would notice the reverence and respect I have for you. The adventure you have started is tremendous; it leads to a better health, to renewed confidence and to a brand new kind of freedom. The gifts you will receive from running will far exceed the gigantic effort it takes you to show up here, to face your fears and to bravely set yourself in motion, in front of others.

    You have already begun your transformation. You no longer accept this physical state of numbness and passivity. You have taken a difficult decision, but one that holds so much promise. Every hard breath you take is actually a tad easier than the one before, and every step is ever so slightly lighter. Each push forward leaves the former person you were in your wake, creating room for an improved version, one that is stronger, healthier and forward-looking, one who knows that anything is possible.

    You’re a hero to me. And, if you’d take off the blaring headphones and put your head up for more than a second or two, you would notice that the other runners you cross, the ones that probably make you feel so inadequate, stare in awe at your determination. They, of all people, know best where you are coming from. They heard the resolutions of so many others, who vowed to pick up running and improve their health, “starting next week”. Yet, it is YOU who runs alongside, who digs from deep inside to find the strength to come here, and to come back again.

    You are a runner, and no one can take that away from you. You are relentlessly moving forward. You are stronger than even you think, and you are about to be amazed by what you can do. One day, very soon, maybe tomorrow, you’ll step outside and marvel at your capabilities. You will not believe your own body, you will realize that you can do this. And a new horizon will open up for you. You are a true inspiration.

    I bow to you.
  • jmm083
    jmm083 Posts: 28 Member
    This is my first every post o MFP but I wanted to respond to you. No matter what size, most women have self-esteem issues in some form or another.

    Last night I went shopping with two friends who are literally half my weight. They were trying on bikinis as I watched on because I cannot fit in to Victoria Secret sizes. I think they each weigh 100-110. They both look perfect in bikinis. And they both have self-esteem issues. At 110 pounds. No one is out there judging you when you are running. Instead, they are worrying about they way THEY look to others.


    You are already kicking butt! Don't worry about what is going on around you. Focus on making yourself as strong as you can be.