How do you keep going?

I don't really know the answer for sure, as I do the same thing!

I am just going to keep trying. I think one helpful thing is to realize that thousands of people actually do achieve long term results. We so often hear (and experience) failure that we (or I) never really expect to have long term success, at least not deep down. But people do succeed. And yhey aren't any different than we are. It just takes building that positive mindset. Or at least I hope that is it, because that is what I am working towards!

I am finding people who have had success and listening to them, letting them mentor me. Its easy to believe real people who have had success.

I go on and off on exercising.. Sometimes I have all the motivation there is and other times none at all. I normally take a break for a couple weeks then get back into working out because do look I'm the mirror or look at old pics and think that I don't want to be obese ever again (I'm at 25.7 bmi, very close to breaking through to normal weight). And mostly I motivate myself by looking at my son and thinking that I should want to be healthy for him and create good habits he will follow.

I keep pushing because this is something I really want for myself. My reasons for doing this are completely selfish, and I think in the end that's why I've been able to keep at it.

There are times I procrastinate to do my workout but that's because I just don't want to go out in the cold. 74 pounds of insulation gone and I can't get warm anymore.

I do get where you are coming from though. I just tell myself it's just an hour out of my day, then I'm done!

Changing things up helps. I too struggle with this all the time! Maybe change up your exercise routines. I know if I do cardio every single day, I get burned out. You can try maybe cardio 3 days a week and strength training 2. I need to take my own advice really, lol. Change up your calories also. The first go round I lost 28 pounds (196 to 168)....I got slack and put 10 pounds back on (up to 178)! So I started back in January logging and exercising more. Now I'm back down to 174, but still have 6 pounds to go before getting back to my lowest weight AND THEN 13 more pounds to go to get to my goal weight of 155. So my laziness caused me to backslide and now it's taking FOREVER to lose these last 19 pounds. UGH. I know how you feel, but you just have to keep going. You can do it!

If you are looking for a "magic bullet" that will permanently inspire you to become fit and healthy, short of a health scare (heart attack, your doctor telling you that due to your morbid obesity you have only a few years left to live, etc) you aren't going to find one. They do not exist.

In order to have success, you need to change your lazy, poor nutrition, unhealthy lifestyle to one that is active with a better nutrition plan. Unfortunately, you have been living this bad habit for years, perhaps decades. That type of habit is not easy to break.

You need to find your own motivation. No one else will motivate you. Ultimately, the little voice inside your head will tell you "You dont need to work out today", "Skipping a day wont ruin things", etc. That is your old self wanting to return.

Fortunately, there is good news. As one gets into the habit of exercising and having a better nutrition plan, as you start to show results, that inner voice will inspire you to continue. "You lost 2 lbs, great job!" or "I moved down a belt loop, these clothes are starting to feel loose!" etc. For most of us, as you get into this new habit of exercising and making better food choices, when your inner voice starts to tell you that it's okay to revert back to your old habits, the new inner voice may remind you of how happy you were as you reached some milestones and then you have to decide which voice you'll listen to.

Everyone who is fit will tell you the following:

1. It isn't easy (especially at first)
2. You will stumble along the way and not reach every goal you set for yourself
3. Once exercising and making better food choices become a habit, then it is harder to revert back to your old lifestyle

Find what motivates you. Figure out your goals. Research what it takes to reach your goals. Then, set up a road map towards your goal.

Then begin.

I can relate to this! Right now, I'm in the right mind set-excited about excercising and eating right, but I know I'm going to have ups and downs. I have lost and gained weight so many times! I wish I had the answer- all I know is I have got to keep trying!! This support group helps so much, thanks for everyone's input!:flowerforyou:

I have some weird self loathing habits. As soon as I (or others) notice a huge positive change in my appearance, I start self sabotaging. It is something I am really working on!

I see you're on your way to your goal...but I understand, when you know it will take time to get there it can appear very daunting. I've done the same for years...start strong then backslide or deciding "today I just don't want this battle". So I posted some sayings on the fridge like, "One year from now you'll wish you'd started today," or cartoons that made me grin. It helped me to realize, on those tough days, I needed to get past the not wanting to put in the effort and get to the mindset that I wasn't happy with what I'd been doing... so I'd still be unhappy with myself if I didn't put in the effort to help myself., I told myself I'd just concentrate on today...and take one day at a time. I would have days that didn't work out for me but the next day was new and I never beat myself up for "failing". That in itself is defeatist. Anyway, sorry to be long-winded, but each new pound lost or day put in at the gym is a mini-success and you've moved one more step toward the goal you deserve! Good luck.

I firmly believe that the reason people lose motivation is because they are trying to do too much all at once.

You see it all the time... someone decides they want to lose weight, they instantly throw out all the 'unhealthy food' in their house, join a gym, start working out 6 days a week, stop eating anything 'bad', cut back calories drastically. Most people don't even bother to research to find out how many they should actually eat and just go based on some arbitrary number they are told by a website, a friend or some other completely un-tested and non-scientific method which does not take into consideration their specific information such as age, weight, height, activity level etc .They lose a few pounds sure, but eventually they get tired, start feeling sad, depressed, deprived and totally unmotivated to keep killing themselves for 'nothing'.

Funny thing is..You don't need to do all that stuff immediately - heck you don't need to do it AT ALL unless you want to. Losing weight is not hard but people try to make it hard..all the time. The ONLY thing you need to do to lose weight is to eat LESS, not cut it out, not starve, not throw out everything ...just eat less..just a little less..how much less all depends on what you weigh now and how much you eat NOW. So obviously the best way to figure that out is to track everything you eat right NOW, on a normal day when you aren't 'dieting'..You really need a baseline..Really.

When I started I was eating about 2800 calories a day and maintaining about 220lbs. I had been that same weight for a while so that was a pretty good measure of my 'maintenance calories' (for 220lbs). To start losing weight you just need to cut about 20% (less if you have less to lose) So for someone like me cutting back about 600 calories a day was perfect.. I lost about 25 lbs my first month (normal when you have almost 100lbs to lose). Since then I have lost @ 1.8lbs every week with really no more than just watching my calories and continuing to do exactly what I was doing before. I just recently joined a gym so that I can go to Zumba occasionally - maybe 1/week if I manage to make it. I eat the same stuff - just less of it. I still have birthday cake, restaurant meals, chocolate, McDonald's but now I make slightly better choices and take slightly smaller portions. I don't eat 'diet food'. I cook normal things for myself and my family. If I want a chocolate, I eat it and just eat a little less the next day or maybe walk a little.

Seriously..just start slow. Track your food for a week, THEN cut 20% from the calories that you were eating to maintain your weight. Do that for a while - I guarantee you will lose weight if you are honest with your tracking (buy a scale and weigh EVERYTHING) It's amazing what happens when you start losing weight and you aren't feeling deprived, or tired because you are starving.. You WANT to move more, no one has to force you to go to the gym or go for a walk..you just feel like doing it.

Stop forcing yourself to do things..baby steps..

It would be nice if I wanted to work out everyday. I used to think losing weight would transform me into this super active person - but I am a lazy person. I just am. I enjoy lounging around. I am more active than I used to be but it's still not unusual for me to spend a few hours on the internet or watching television each day.

There's maybe 2 or 3 days a week where I am super motivated to work out and kick *kitten*, but the rest of the time I make myself do it. And I tell myself "Steph, go to the gym for an hour and then it's over. After that you can lay on the couch, drinking coffee and watching Greys Anatomy marathons"

If I only worked out when I had the motivation to, it wouldn't happen often. I just stop thinking of it as a choice. It is something I have to do like showering or washing my dishes. It is a task to be done.

OMG! You are my Canadian twin!

(Except I watch shows other than Gray's Anatomy. My favorite drama is "Dallas")




OP,

Hmmm...Well I have to eat every day. In fact, I generally eat 3-4 times a day, sometimes more. So the eating thing is like a reminder, but sometimes I eat more than other days, and lately I've been eating a cream cheese coffeecake that I pick up on the way to work when I could be eating a protein bar instead. But I just forgive myself and try to do better.

So far as exercise... I don't go to a gym. I will typically do my strength training exercises while watching my TV shows. It seems to help.

i think we all struggle to keep going.
but just remember that a slip up does not mean a give up and without struggle there is no progress.
i definitely have weeks here and there where i start to revert back to old ways
every choice you make will either take you one step closer, or one step further away from where you want to be.


everything in moderation my friend ...even the bad stuff.

i could never live my life without homemade pizza, restaurant wings, garlic bread, french fries ..and alllllllll that good stuff.

i agree that its easy to lose motivation, but it's also easy to find if you know where to look

Man do I LOVE being lazy, like I really truly enjoy it. But I also enjoy how I feel when I'm not and when I do move more. So, I try to keep a balance. I wake up extra early to go to the gym because I know getting it done early means when I get home from work, I can be as lazy as I want with no guilt. It gives me the freedom to exercise in the evenings if I want to and not because I feel I have to. Also, I have to give myself credit for how far I've come. All too often I think we get so used to focusing on where we still need to improve rather than celebrating how far we've already come. It's not easy but I also remind myself I have no other option. It's no longer a choice. I got to nearly 400 lbs by choosing to not do anything and eat crap and was digging my own grave with each spoonful I shoveled into my mouth. That is no longer an option. Death is no longer an option for me. Reminding myself of this every. single. day. is what gets me through on the days I just don't wanna. Because more than I don't wanna move sometimes, I don't wanna die young. I deserve more than that. We all do.

Sounds like you're asking "how do you stay motivated?"

My answer is that motivation is overrated. Once you start thinking about it as non-optional, motivation doesn't even play into the equation.

You brush your teeth because you have to. You to go work because you have to. You take care of your body and eat right and exercise because you have to.