My wife is sabatoging my attempts to quit diet soda

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Replies

  • Bonita_Lynne_58
    Bonita_Lynne_58 Posts: 2,794 Member

    Or hit her in the head with a shovel and bury her in the backyard. Your call.

    OM G LMFAO I've thought the same thing with a certain somebody who lives in this house. He keeps ducking when I swing though...any suggestions?

    Aim at his chest?
  • krissielynn87
    krissielynn87 Posts: 214 Member
    Diet Coke and Mentos.
    You're welcome
  • Deipneus
    Deipneus Posts: 1,855 Member
    Have you shown her exactly what aspartame does? How dangerous it is?
    I killed my ex-wife with it. Sshh. It's a secret.
  • Bonita_Lynne_58
    Bonita_Lynne_58 Posts: 2,794 Member
    Have you shown her exactly what aspartame does? How dangerous it is?
    I killed my ex-wife with it. Sshh. It's a secret.

    I won't tell if you give me comprehensive instructions...need asap...for scientific research only (ex husband is safe..)
  • BamBam1113
    BamBam1113 Posts: 542 Member
    How is there even time for her to have diet soda? Are there no dishes to be washed, ironing to be done, meals to be cooked, socks to be mended....I mean c'mon bro.
  • JulesAtkinson1
    JulesAtkinson1 Posts: 219 Member
    What a (burp)
    Have you guys tried counselling? I had a similar problem with my wife and diet soda in particular. I kept trying to tell her that we couldn't keep it in the house but she was being REALLY selfish about it. We went and spoke with a professional and things are much better now.

    if your wives really loved you, they'd drink it outside or wait until you weren't home to drink the diet soda.

    i guess they don't really love you.

    you should both demand a divorce.

    ^^^On grounds of emotional abuse. Better yet, file a claim for psychological damages. What is she thinking??????
  • JulesAtkinson1
    JulesAtkinson1 Posts: 219 Member

    Or hit her in the head with a shovel and bury her in the backyard. Your call.

    OM G LMFAO I've thought the same thing with a certain somebody who lives in this house. He keeps ducking when I swing though...any suggestions?

    Aim at his chest?

    No! They must be whacked in the head. THE MEDULLA OBLONGTA!!!!!!
  • OnionMomma
    OnionMomma Posts: 938 Member

    Or hit her in the head with a shovel and bury her in the backyard. Your call.

    OM G LMFAO I've thought the same thing with a certain somebody who lives in this house. He keeps ducking when I swing though...any suggestions?

    Aim at his chest?

    Or surprise them with a downward swing instead of a straight one. Works every time.
  • AngelsInThighHighs
    AngelsInThighHighs Posts: 247 Member

    Or hit her in the head with a shovel and bury her in the backyard. Your call.

    OM G LMFAO I've thought the same thing with a certain somebody who lives in this house. He keeps ducking when I swing though...any suggestions?

    Aim at his chest?

    Or surprise them with a downward swing instead of a straight one. Works every time.

    When he ducks yell "NAKED BABIES!!!" And swing with the back end of the shovel, that should throw him off ;D
  • Bonita_Lynne_58
    Bonita_Lynne_58 Posts: 2,794 Member

    Or hit her in the head with a shovel and bury her in the backyard. Your call.

    OM G LMFAO I've thought the same thing with a certain somebody who lives in this house. He keeps ducking when I swing though...any suggestions?

    Aim at his chest?

    No! They must be whacked in the head. THE MEDULLA OBLONGTA!!!!!!

    He ducks when she aims at his head.....figure chest should put him in line for the swing.
  • Bonita_Lynne_58
    Bonita_Lynne_58 Posts: 2,794 Member

    Or hit her in the head with a shovel and bury her in the backyard. Your call.

    OM G LMFAO I've thought the same thing with a certain somebody who lives in this house. He keeps ducking when I swing though...any suggestions?

    Aim at his chest?

    Or surprise them with a downward swing instead of a straight one. Works every time.

    When he ducks yell "NAKED BABIES!!!" And swing with the back end of the shovel, that should throw him off ;D

    Perfection! :smokin:
  • CoraGregoryCPA
    CoraGregoryCPA Posts: 1,087 Member
    Remind her how bloated she is when she drinks Soda. Yuck!
  • pushyourself14
    pushyourself14 Posts: 275 Member

    Or hit her in the head with a shovel and bury her in the backyard. Your call.

    OM G LMFAO I've thought the same thing with a certain somebody who lives in this house. He keeps ducking when I swing though...any suggestions?

    He has to sleep sometime ;)
  • lbesaw
    lbesaw Posts: 267 Member
    Come on now---take charge of yourself and leave your wife out of it. If YOU decide not to eat or drink something than just DON'T--nobody else is responsible for your success or failure---JUST YOU. Do you think the whole world should not have something just because you decide not to? True--those around you may lend their support---but when they don't you still have to STAY your own course. Grow a pair and take responsibility for yourself!
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,247 Member
    I have a very hard time waking up early to make my husband's sammich if I don't have the caffeine buzz from a diet soda. Think of the consequences before you make demands.
  • RainHoward
    RainHoward Posts: 1,599 Member
    just tell her she's fat and you don't find her attractive any more as you head out the door to the strip club. the problem will fix its self.
  • emtjmac
    emtjmac Posts: 1,320 Member
    My suggestion would be to never put diet soda in your mouth. That is a surefire method for quitting.

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