Don't hate me because I'm losing weight.....

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  • bethiepoo30
    bethiepoo30 Posts: 16
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    With a few people, I noticed that while I was still bigger than them, I received lots of compliments about how much weight I had lost. After I had gotten smaller than them (and in better shape), the compliments stopped. I think it is apparent to them now that hard work and dedication to diet and exercise are the key. Those same folks also criticize my low carb approach when I'm out of earshot. Hey, to each their own, I've never tried to push it on anyone else but it has worked for me.

    I've found that the people who truly care about you will be the most gracious in their response.
  • JeremyMo88
    JeremyMo88 Posts: 18 Member
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    After that she asked me how I did it and I told her, hard work and dedication.
    It was almost like she didn't want to believe that I had worked at it, her and I assume the rest of the ladies wanted to believe that my weight loss was easy and just handed to me.

    I have had a lot of instances like that. Everyone is impressed and hating on me for my weight loss. When I tell them it takes time and discipline they immediately lose interest.
  • diannethegeek
    diannethegeek Posts: 14,776 Member
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    Some of my closest friends lost their minds when I started to lose large amounts of weight, including one of my best friends who got drunk one night and begged me to stop before I got skinnier than she is. (Happy to say I'm now a size smaller than her!) I've found that it does settle down as people get used to your new weight, it just takes a long time. Almost no one comments on my weight loss anymore.
  • Cupcakehippiemommy
    Cupcakehippiemommy Posts: 457 Member
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    Yes!! Especially from those you don't expect it from! I actually got a couple of people to get on this site and try it out so far they are meeting their goals :D Let them hate doll and keep kickin' *kitten*!!
  • KevinsCatie
    KevinsCatie Posts: 137 Member
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    When someone says something like that, what they are really saying is that they envy you, and hate themselves. I know, because I have said the exact same thing to a friend of mine who was always bigger than me. When she found out she shouldnt eat gluten, she lost a ton! Unfortunately I was gaining weight at that same time, and I really was just jealous of her and disgusted with myself. Really, thats all it boils down to is jealousy.
  • lbetancourt
    lbetancourt Posts: 522 Member
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    this is why i surround myself with men. but, i use to get comments like this but i actually loved it. it means i am doing something right. yes.. biatches........ i am thin!! look at me! look at me!

    enjoy your accomplishments!
  • KimberlyDCZ
    KimberlyDCZ Posts: 525 Member
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    Don't take it personally when someone says "I hate you, you're so skinny" My best friend has always been thin and she takes these comments to heart. They don't mean any harm, however they ARE jeaoous. I have had comments like this from my mother who was right beside me for the first few months then she gave up. I've lost 60 lbs and she's back up to her start weight. It can be hurtful but just keep doing what you're doing for YOU. Lead by example. Maybe eventually they will see what you're doing is the only way to lose weight and keep it off; and follow in your footsteps. If not, it's no one's fault but their own.
  • Yasmine91
    Yasmine91 Posts: 599 Member
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    I actually love it when girls start hating on me when I lose weight >:)
  • leantool
    leantool Posts: 365 Member
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    you don't have to brag, 60 hopping lbs will show!!
    women are cats and take that jealousy as compliment and go for the GOAL!!!:drinker: to your success!!
  • Zoe85
    Zoe85 Posts: 19 Member
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    I couldn't believe what happened to me the other day. I work in an office with about 35-40 women, and about 95% of them are seriously over weight. In July of last year I started on my current path and have lost 60 lbs. One of the girls from the office was talking to me and said, "You know all the girls upstairs are hatin on you because you lost all this weight?" I was stunned, I asked why. She told me that they were jealous that they were still fat and that I had...(she paused here, so I chimed in with) "Worked my butt off?" She said, "Yeah, I guess so."
    After that she asked me how I did it and I told her, hard work and dedication.
    It was almost like she didn't want to believe that I had worked at it, her and I assume the rest of the ladies wanted to believe that my weight loss was easy and just handed to me.
    My own mother looked at me the other day and said, (and this is a direct quote) "You looks so thin, I hate you." I know it was a joke but I am getting similar reactions from a lot of people. It looks like they only felt good about themselves when I was grossly overweight. It is totally crazy.


    Has anyone else had a similar experience. I seem to be running into this quite often, and I am not one to brag or flaunt any of my weight loss to anyone. I don't want them to feel bad about not doing it for themselves, but it seems that just seeing me is enough to make them hate.

    Hi, I also work in an office of seriously overweight people and most of them always say 'you don't need to lose anymore weight' bla bla bla. I also get slimmer people saying the same thing!

    You've worked hard and be proud of yourself and ignore the jealous ones! :)
  • KassLamb
    KassLamb Posts: 98 Member
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    There was one point when I was down to 165 from 217. Even at 217, I was one of the smaller ladies in the office. When I got down to 165, they were saying things like, "Woah, you're going to blow away in the wind!" or "Are you feeling ok? You've been looking really thin lately." (Come on, I was 165... still overweight for me.)
  • Zoe85
    Zoe85 Posts: 19 Member
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    I actually love it when girls start hating on me when I lose weight >:)

    I love it too :)
  • cuterbee
    cuterbee Posts: 545
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    They are hating you so they don't have to hate themselves. And I doubt it rises to the level of actual hate -- it's way of expressing envy.


    Having said that, I am very lucky that I have no people like this in my life (and...that's been many deliberate choices over the years to have it this way!). I have one friend who very jokingly "hates" everything good that happens to everyone (but always follows it with, "Seriously -- congratulations!").
  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,834 Member
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    Has anyone else had a similar experience.

    It really isn't hate towards you. You are just a scapegoat for the hate they have for tehmselves not being able to work that hard and commit to a better lifestyle. I get it sometimes, but mostly as jokes and such.

    Funny thing though, this morning I was talking to a few friends from the IT department I used to work in. I have invited all of them to join in my fitness challenges and mile challenges but no one has ever taken me up. Boy, they are all looking stressed, overweight, and getting sick often. Anyway, one guy I don't know very well mentioned that he saw a few email and heard me talking to others about all of it and he has already lost almost 30 pounds with some basic changes like I suggested. I was super proud that even indirectly I was able to help.

    So the thing is, with your new found confidence and healthy lifestyle, don't get bitter. Don't hate back or remove them from your life. Kill htem with kindness and help them understand they can achieve what you have. Support them and see who might be the next 'you' in the office that everyone is hating on! Start the trend!
  • TheRunningGuppy
    TheRunningGuppy Posts: 651 Member
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    Well, I don't have the problem of working in an office full of ladies (work remotely from home...) but I did have someone I know ask me the other day if I was on any special diet, from the sound of it, she was hoping for a quick fix. I told her it's the common sense diet. Eat what you want in moderation, and work out, a lot. She got that disappointed look on her face. But what can ya do? People are always going to be jealous when they see you achieving what they want for themselves.
  • pudgeylou
    pudgeylou Posts: 202 Member
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    I am glad to see that I am not the only one getting this reaction. I haven't let it stop me or even slow me down, and in my heart I wish that everyone would try what I am doing just so they can feel as great as I do now. I started at almost 250 lbs and I am nowhere near my goal but I feel so much better already.
    I really wish them the best of luck and I know that no one will start until they reach that breaking point, until then they just complain about it.
    Hating is such a waste of energy.

    I want to say to everyone here....No matter what anyone else says or does....you are amazing! Keep up the great work
  • acogg
    acogg Posts: 1,870 Member
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    I have one friend who is morbidly obese and she LOVES to tell me that I am doing this all wrong! It is so hard not to laugh.
  • missjeanlouise
    missjeanlouise Posts: 80 Member
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    On Friday they left a half eaten cake next to my desk (which is close to the little break room area) so Saturday and Sunday it sat there untouched because I wasn't going to eat it and by Monday they were angry at me because I "let it go to waste." I was absolutely astounded.

    That there is some crazy ****. I'm glad the people I work with don't notice or care what I'm eating.

    I do get the "It's so unfair! You've lost weight. I hate you" crap from a few people outside of work, including my mom. I just say, "I haven't done anything that everyone else in the world can't do." It's true. Every single person has the means and the ability to lose weight. If they choose not to, that's they're business, but don't tell me I've accomplished this easily. That's like my 'friend' who once told me that I was '"lucky" that I have a graduate degree. I didn't win it in the lottery!!
  • RocknnRobin
    RocknnRobin Posts: 20 Member
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    I can relate.

    At my last job there were tons of miserable, overweight, stressed women.
    So, did they want to start a weight-watchers group or do aerobics together?
    Hell no.
    But they'd hold bi-weekly greasy potlucks and monthly 'birthday' celebrations, where everyone was required to attend—and if you refused a piece of 'cake' or whatever other horrible treat was being offered, people would act seriously butt hurt over it on a personal level.
    It was a toxic environment: and toxic people thrived there. Over-eaters under the guise of 'motherly-love' would use every excuse to bring cupcakes, ice-cream and fudge-bars in. You couldn't walk from your desk to the bathroom without passing a tray of snacks or box of krispy kremes. Ri-dic-ulous.

    Eventually a few of us health-concious girls made a stand—declaring ourselves pre-diabetic or sugar free. Only if you had a serious medical condition would they leave you alone—and then, you would still catch attitude from them.

    I think this is just ugly human nature at it's core. My husband said he had a similar work environment once where the owner was a functional alcoholic, and he would play favorites with anyone who would go 'drink' with him.

    It's sad. But you can't let toxic people or workplaces bring you down.
  • carrieous
    carrieous Posts: 1,024 Member
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    sounds like she was trying to give you a compliment, Dont be so quick to get offended

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