Ladies enlighten me
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The first girl I was interested in was in 4th grade while I was in 6th grade. Of course no make up, she played physically (basketball) and was a band nerd like me (that's where we met).
When she got into middle school with me, she didn't change. Still no make up and still athletic. I swooned over her still. Then in high school, she pretty much gave up on band and sports and was more into dressing up and make up. And at that point I lost interest in her. I still hadn't had a girlfriend at that point (I was a total nerd), but maybe I lost interest because she wasn't in band anymore or I didn't see her as much. I'll have to think back a little more.
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Funny you mention that. So a lot of the girls I see who do sports usually have dad in their corner at events. Does it correlate with these same girls continuing physically into middle and high school? I'll keep inquiring.What about girls who continued to play sports throughout middle and high school? Any opinions?
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My nine year old daughter and I were just talking about this yesterday.
She asked me what my favorite sport was and I told her I really didn't like sports when I was in middle/high school.
(So I guess I'm addressing the converse side of this particular question).
I remember not feeling very about my athletic abilities and wanting to avoid being made fun of by the boys in middle school.
I went to an all girls high school, and my perception of the girls who played sports was that the were "jocks" and maybe a bit less feminine? I know I couldn't stand that "guy" female gym teacher who made us run the mile.:grumble:
I was a baton twirler and in the color guard for marching band, so I guess I considered those my "sports".
I enjoyed both immensely, but not sure if it was because I was good at them or if they were considered more "girly".
A couple additional thoughts:
Girls are beginning puberty younger and younger along with the hormonal changes.
I remember feeling like I was losing my mind when I went thru puberty and I'm seeing some of that in my daughter too.
However, she remains athletic and this may finally answer your 2nd question here.
I believe how well a girl navigates sports, middle and high school, hormonal changes, boys etc. is due in large part to the self esteem she gains from a positive, highly interactive relationship with her father.
I didn't have that, so I didn't believe in myself or my athletic abilities.
My husband is an amazing father and our daughter is an intelligent, funny, adventurous girl who loves to try new things.
I sometimes wish I could have been more like her and I'm so glad she has some of her father's personality.
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If they're so inclined, I believe so.
I think by high school you need to have natural talent, ability and desire but the right foundation laid by dad is a huge advantage.0 -
The first girl I was interested in was in 4th grade while I was in 6th grade. Of course no make up, she played physically (basketball) and was a band nerd like me (that's where we met).
When she got into middle school with me, she didn't change. Still no make up and still athletic. I swooned over her still. Then in high school, she pretty much gave up on band and sports and was more into dressing up and make up. And at that point I lost interest in her. I still hadn't had a girlfriend at that point (I was a total nerd), but maybe I lost interest because she wasn't in band anymore or I didn't see her as much. I'll have to think back a little more.
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Ha! Losing interest in band would have been a deal breaker for me.:noway:
Fellow band nerd here:bigsmile:0 -
This is why I prefer single sex education. As I recall one of my schools was full of princesses who hated sports, but that was because we had a boys school just down the road and did a lot of activities with them. My other school, though, was great. It was boarding so quite a lot of the girls had no contact with boys outside of visits home and a few school activities and they basically set the tone of the school. Lots of sports, excellent field hockey team and a few dozen other sports offered over the year. We had showers in the changing rooms but rarely bothered using them because none of us cared about a little sweat and there were no boys to impress.
My friends who went to co-ed schools didn't bother with school sport and always found an excuse to sit out PE lessons.0 -
It makes sense. I'll have to research some moms with daughters who are in all girl schools to get their opinions too. Thanks.This is why I prefer single sex education. As I recall one of my schools was full of princesses who hated sports, but that was because we had a boys school just down the road and did a lot of activities with them. My other school, though, was great. It was boarding so quite a lot of the girls had no contact with boys outside of visits home and a few school activities and they basically set the tone of the school. Lots of sports, excellent field hockey team and a few dozen other sports offered over the year. We had showers in the changing rooms but rarely bothered using them because none of us cared about a little sweat and there were no boys to impress.
My friends who went to co-ed schools didn't bother with school sport and always found an excuse to sit out PE lessons.
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we will probably find a cure for cancer before we are able to learn the inner trappings of a pre teen females mind
it could be as simple as she doesnt want to get sweaty in front of boys
Right? I went through it all and don't even know or understand it...0 -
I don't know why my text didn't show up with my gif. I was wearing a B cup by 5th grade and a C by 8th grade. I was SUPER self conscious and anyone who wanted me to run could eff off. I really wish I'd had a nice supportive sports bra. Honestly though, it may not have helped. I wanted to look pretty and clean. G.d forbid my crush see me sweating or with a hair out of place. This was only at school though. I played girl's softball for the city league. I had no issue running around and getting sweaty when there weren't a bunch of boys watching. Then once I was in highschool, I didn't care who was watching.0
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I hated gym in middle and hs! From 7-10th grade I always managed to have first period gym class. What girl wants to wake up, take a shower, get pretty, and then go to school to run around and get sweaty less then an hour after getting pretty. We only had 5 minutes to change from gym clothes back into our school clothes. So there was never time to take a shower, get dressed, and look pretty again. I think that is the biggest problem with girls and gym class. If they had 15-20 minutes to get ready after gym instead of the 5-10 minutes girls would be more likely to participate in gym. I also played hockey after school which was an hour of on ice time and an hour of personal trainer every day but sundays. So 1st period gym did not sit well witth us girls that had sports and were at practice until 8 at night and didn't get to bed until at least midnight. (first period started at 750!)0
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For me, I didn't put in the effort in PE because I had it in the middle of the day. I'd spend an hour every morning getting ready and I'd be darned if I was going to get all sweaty and have to take a shower and not be able to fix myself back up. NO one ever took showers in the girl's locker room. Plus I just couldn't be bothered/hated running and would rather chat with my friends.
Edited to add:
I did a lot of other things after school that kept me in shape like cheerleading, horseback riding, snowboarding, pushing a giant piano around the school to play for drama club and choir....things like that so I didn't see the need. That's why I picked weightlifting over PE. I did actually lift weights in that class and still got to talk to my friends0 -
There has been a ton of material written about gender role identity, and if there isn't a very large subset about sports within that material I would be surprised.
A reference librarian at your local public library could help you create a very specific reading list. I'd be interested to read your paper when it's done.0 -
Puberty makes both sexes self-conscious, but there's infinitely more pressure on girls. Plus, the female physicality hero is often the hot cheerleader, not the captain of the girls' field hockey or basketball team. Male tastes are running the show.0
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my experience is different. my daughter is in middle-school and runs track. throughout elementary school, i could never get her interested in any athletic pursuits outside of PE class in school. her last year in elementary, she started running track, and liked it. when she started developing, she was very uncomfortable with her body, but i think being on the track team really helped. around that same time, her sweat gained an odor, which is possibly why kids that age stop exercising.0
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Just bumping so my friends see this...
Nice try. You don't have any friends.
A day late, but that was funny.0 -
It makes sense. I'll have to research some moms with daughters who are in all girl schools to get their opinions too. Thanks.This is why I prefer single sex education. As I recall one of my schools was full of princesses who hated sports, but that was because we had a boys school just down the road and did a lot of activities with them. My other school, though, was great. It was boarding so quite a lot of the girls had no contact with boys outside of visits home and a few school activities and they basically set the tone of the school. Lots of sports, excellent field hockey team and a few dozen other sports offered over the year. We had showers in the changing rooms but rarely bothered using them because none of us cared about a little sweat and there were no boys to impress.
My friends who went to co-ed schools didn't bother with school sport and always found an excuse to sit out PE lessons.
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I went to an all girls high school.
I did comment on that briefly in my first post.
Let me know if/what type of elaboration you would like.0 -
I blame gym class and sports in general. If you are not athletic, you will be humiliated. Being chosen absolutely last for teams. And I wasn't even overweight then. Gym class made me detest exercise forever!0
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I think dad cheering his daughter on has a great deal to do with the success of most things in a childs life and resonates in adulthood.0
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Just bumping so my friends see this...
Nice try. You don't have any friends.
Awww you're SO sweet!0
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