Going through the motions...

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jlberzinskas
jlberzinskas Posts: 19
in Motivation and Support
I've been "good" lately, logging my food, completing my day, keeping my food intake reasonable, etc. But I haven't been great! I want to be as motivated as I was when I started. I haven't been to the gym in about 2 weeks, and I just can't seem to get out of my own way. Has anyone else found themselves in this situation? It's pretty much exactly what has always derailed me from being successful in the past. It starts with one day of just being hungry on the way home from work and grabbing whatever is fast at 11:00 at night, and just goes on from there. I am not making any excuses about it, and I'm not posting here to whine or get some superficial pat on the *kitten* from people that "understand". I think there's just too much coddling on here sometimes, so when I go and get taco bell at midnight and haven't eaten 3 of my 5 other meals throughout the day and end up under my calorie goal, the last thing I want to see on my notifications is "good job" or "great day". I've even been rethinking my friend list on here to find people that are serious about supporting each other and not just wanting someone to hand hold them through this thing. UGH!! Anyone have any input here? Sorry for the babbling!
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Replies

  • mbk830
    mbk830 Posts: 164 Member
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    When you figure it out, let me know. I've had weeks of struggling.
  • bostonwolf
    bostonwolf Posts: 3,038 Member
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    I tend to edit my friend list constantly if people drop off for a few weeks, aren't as serious about getting in shape as I am, are eating what i'd consider to be a starvation-level of food. Don't feel guilty for doing so, this place is about getting yourself in shape so use it for that purpose.
  • quirkytizzy
    quirkytizzy Posts: 4,052 Member
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    If you're not getting what you need from your friends list, make a cut and start getting new people.
  • bostonwolf
    bostonwolf Posts: 3,038 Member
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    I'll also say this. A large part of this starts with you. You are the one who controls what you eat, no one else. If you find yourself slipping into bad habits, ask what would be necessary to change those habits, then do it until you have a new routine.

    Bring healthier food to work, or have a bag of beef jerky in your car. Eating that will be a hell of a lot healthier than anything you get at a fast-food joint.

    Things didn't change for me until I took control. I looked at the foods and situations that used to cause me to eat out of control and I eliminated the foods and the situations. I pretty much know what I'm going to eat every day that morning and I log the entire day accordingly. I know I'm going to go to the gym just about every night too. Make these things a habit and take responsibility for yourself and things will start to change.

    I don't mean to be harsh with this, I'm just sharing the internal conversation I had with myself that finally got me to make lasting changes to my situation.
  • jlberzinskas
    jlberzinskas Posts: 19
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    i've been battling with myself about posting this for a week or so... i don't want to sound pathetic or like I'm whining... Just looking for something or someone to shake me out of it I guess. :ohwell:
  • khall86790
    khall86790 Posts: 1,100 Member
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    I'd keep in mind your friends probably don't check your diary after seeing you are under for the day before congratulating you. Unfortunately, I think you will get that no matter who you befriend on here because nobody is that obsessive with each other's diaries.
  • Dulcemami4ever
    Dulcemami4ever Posts: 344 Member
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    First of all, your friends list is not your problem. YOU are your problem. If people see you eating under your calorie they will automatically say "Great day", regardless of what you are eating. If I saw someone eating taco bell I am not going to sit there and ream them for eating it. Because let's face it, you are eating something you want and more power to you if you keep your calories under.

    If you want motivation, you are going to have to dig inside and grab ahold of it. I get the same way you do, but I want this so bad, I just can't stop. I am at a deficit all week until friday hit's and then I have a cheat meal. Everyone is different in how they deal with cravings etc. If you mess up, get back on the wagon the next day. Do not let it beat you. Take some pictures and compare yourself to day one. Maybe that will help.

    I like to support my friends, but I am not there to be a menu nazi and comb thru what they eat. UNLESS they specifically say that they are having issues losing weight. You can add me if you like, and we can push each other. Remember you are worth it to push yourself. Get motivated again!!
  • mklassy123
    mklassy123 Posts: 153
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    I just typed a very similar thing myself (probably as you were typing this one). My motivating is just kaput, and I don't know why. I start off every morning perfect. I even plan out my food for the day. Then I don't know what happens.

    I do know that I am doing this for me, no one else, but sometimes somebody will write something that just "sticks". I'm hoping your thread or my thread finds that for us, and everyone else who seems to be struggling.
  • Kelley528
    Kelley528 Posts: 319 Member
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    I have read countless times that the biggest percentage of successful weight management is what you put into your mouth and the smaller percentage is exercise. You can maintain a healthy weight without going to the gym.

    I suggest learning how to control your eating habits first then worry about fitting the gym into your lifestyle.

    I used to be a gym rat, never paid too much attention to what I ate although i was never an over-eater, and I looked great at the time. Very fit, lean, and healthy. The second my life changed and I couldnt fit the gym into my life as often as I used to I gained some weight. Then I quit going altogether and gained a lot of weight for my frame all because I didnt know how to eat properly.

    I, too, used to be so hungry after work I would shove chips, granola bars, or cookies ( anything that didnt require cooking) into my mouth to hold me over until I got some real food. You did that with Taco Bell. Once I learned how to eat properly by using MFP, I have never been so starving on the way home from work that I ate totally useless and unfulfilling food. Maybe once you can manage your daily meals and get control of that aspect of your life then you can worry about incorporating the gym into your weightloss routine. All I do at the moment is daily walking. I've got the food and weight thing under control. Now I'm ready for heavier exercise. Im going to add in exercise in the next few weeks.
  • FionaDFair
    FionaDFair Posts: 125 Member
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    I've dealt with bouts of demotivation over the course of the last year or so, and it usually only lasts a few days. Then I try to find ways to get motivated again: take my measurements and look at my progress compared to the month before, find healthful recipes, and look over the community forums for success stories. Those things help me sometimes. This January I also started taking pictures once a month (thanks to a group of friends on Facebook who are also trying to get fit and healthy).

    Good advice:
    I'll also say this. A large part of this starts with you. You are the one who controls what you eat, no one else. If you find yourself slipping into bad habits, ask what would be necessary to change those habits, then do it until you have a new routine.

    Bring healthier food to work, or have a bag of beef jerky in your car. Eating that will be a hell of a lot healthier than anything you get at a fast-food joint.

    Things didn't change for me until I took control. I looked at the foods and situations that used to cause me to eat out of control and I eliminated the foods and the situations. I pretty much know what I'm going to eat every day that morning and I log the entire day accordingly. I know I'm going to go to the gym just about every night too. Make these things a habit and take responsibility for yourself and things will start to change.

    I don't mean to be harsh with this, I'm just sharing the internal conversation I had with myself that finally got me to make lasting changes to my situation.

    I've been finding more healthful snacks to keep in my locker, fridge or purse at work: small 1 oz reusable containers of almonds, clementines, plain greek yogurt, sugar snap peas. I know that I'll be hungry between meals and want a little something after work, so I try to be prepared with healthful options. My husband and I have also gotten into menu planning and trying to think ahead about what foods we'll want throughout the week, so that we don't just order pizza (at least not more than once a week ;)
  • ChrissieP80
    ChrissieP80 Posts: 112 Member
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    1.) Evenif I don't feel like it, I put on my exercise clothes and running shoes and get my iPod ready. I trick myself into thinking 'if I still don't want to go I won't go'. I've never gone to trouble of putting on clothes etc and then NOT exercising

    2.) I have never ever regretted the exercise I did or the food I didn't eat. I remind myself of this daily when I am tempted or lazy.
  • usmcmp
    usmcmp Posts: 21,220 Member
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    Join or start a competition. I wanted abs by my birthday, so I asked a few friends to join a challenge group with me. Each week we picked some workout to do each day for a week, like 10 minutes of planks or 50 burpees. Find people who will hold you accountable. Goals and deadlines work great!
  • travelgal59
    travelgal59 Posts: 52 Member
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    i agree w the post that your friend list isnt the problem. that being said......support can help so edit your friend list to a more personally supportive list. only you can decide what kind of help you need. maybe the food issue is that you arent scheduling in enough of the foods you want to eat at the right time. maybe you need to allow for a reasonable(fresco) taco bell run at 10 at night if that helps you stay on track. i shake things up...protein shakes for a week then real food for a few meals including take out. just keep trying and def keep moving. continued success your way.
  • FionaDFair
    FionaDFair Posts: 125 Member
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    This sounds good too. I have a group of friends on Facebook who share photos and progress. I also go to the gym with a friend. Being accountable to her when I'm not there helps keep me going (and now, I go even when I know she can't make it)
    Join or start a competition. I wanted abs by my birthday, so I asked a few friends to join a challenge group with me. Each week we picked some workout to do each day for a week, like 10 minutes of planks or 50 burpees. Find people who will hold you accountable. Goals and deadlines work great!
  • jlberzinskas
    jlberzinskas Posts: 19
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    Here's the other thing.... I was doing great before the last couple weeks... going to the gym, eating from a meal plan, everything was on track, so it's not that I don't have time or I don't know what to eat or when. In fact... I'm a chef, so food is not the issue, though I don't eat at work becauseI'm not hungry when I'm handling food. I know it's all on me and no one else is responsible for any of it, just looking for some encouragement I guess. Thanks everyone so far for your bluntness, I totally need that right now! Oh... and I'm not saying I think anyone needs to be all in my diary, or hold me accountable for my food choices, just saying that I hate the generic responses when I know my day sucked! LOL
  • bostonwolf
    bostonwolf Posts: 3,038 Member
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    i've been battling with myself about posting this for a week or so... i don't want to sound pathetic or like I'm whining... Just looking for something or someone to shake me out of it I guess. :ohwell:

    Glad to help, but I truly believe that the motivation has to come from you.

    You know what to do in order to get in shape. Eat a bit less and eat healthier foods and move around more. You just have to find the triggers that will make you go out and do it. Good luck!
  • boatsie77
    boatsie77 Posts: 480 Member
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    I am not making any excuses about it...

    :huh:

    Read your original post again....

    Get your butt to the gym tonight and report back here tomorrow and tell us how you feel. A little less talking (& excuses) and a lot more action!
  • SlimSumday
    SlimSumday Posts: 379 Member
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    First of all, your friends list is not your problem. YOU are your problem. If people see you eating under your calorie they will automatically say "Great day", regardless of what you are eating. If I saw someone eating taco bell I am not going to sit there and ream them for eating it. Because let's face it, you are eating something you want and more power to you if you keep your calories under.

    If you want motivation, you are going to have to dig inside and grab ahold of it. I get the same way you do, but I want this so bad, I just can't stop. I am at a deficit all week until friday hit's and then I have a cheat meal. Everyone is different in how they deal with cravings etc. If you mess up, get back on the wagon the next day. Do not let it beat you. Take some pictures and compare yourself to day one. Maybe that will help.

    I like to support my friends, but I am not there to be a menu nazi and comb thru what they eat. UNLESS they specifically say that they are having issues losing weight. You can add me if you like, and we can push each other. Remember you are worth it to push yourself. Get motivated again!!
    Yup. This.
  • BrettPGH
    BrettPGH Posts: 4,720 Member
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    ...walking through the part
  • jmadams111
    jmadams111 Posts: 145 Member
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    After I had a heart attack last year, I found all the motivation I need!
    You don't need that, I hope.

    Now I get motivated by looking at myself in the mirror and deciding I like what I see a LOT better than what I used to see.

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