petty jealousy problems...

okay for real. serious question.

i'm totally jealous, and its totally petty... and i know it. k?
my goal is not to make anybody upset or make anyone feel... awkward?

but seriously, i am 128 pounds... and i see all these BOMB gals who are like 140-150 and up, and
they have WAY hotter bodies than i do... like bikini able...

HOW does this happen?!

i mean i know i have a little one and what not... but like where the hell are you hiding 30+ pounds?!?!?!?!

i'm super jealous, and i want to know like from you ladies, is it just a complete different body build... or just mere fact that we are harder on ourselves than other people?... =\
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Replies

  • Chris99mu
    Chris99mu Posts: 352 Member
    Lifting. Heavy. Trading fat for lean mass. Do yourself a favor - toss the scale and pick up The New Rules of Lifting for Women.

    GL!
  • jestersand
    jestersand Posts: 61 Member
    Definitely our own worst critics, but I feel you on the jealousy. I have what i refer to as a tree trunk shape. I don't have curves at all so to me, I would need to really hit a 98lb goal to feel good in a bikini. My breasts are tiny and the only part of me I can maybe work with it my gigantic bootay. I figure if I make it rounder and fuller with a million squats, it will give me some shape. From what I hear, men like booties more than breasts, so I find some hope in that.
  • arsimpson1
    arsimpson1 Posts: 59 Member
    They may just have more muscle mass or their height can play a role. I'm short so some of my tall friends weigh more than me but look better and slimmer ( NO fair) lol
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
    Lifting. Heavy. Trading fat for lean mass...

    Try it. You'll like it! :flowerforyou:
  • the answer to your question is that those girls lift weights. That IS THE ENTIRE DIFFERENCE> it has nothing to do with being more hard on yourself. Do a quick google search to see how much space 5 lbs of fat takes up vs five lbs of muscle. Muscle is much denser (read: takes up less space). So a 128 pound lifter compared to a 128 lb no lifter: the lifter will be much smaller and leaner (less body fat) probably. if you like that body type you should start lifting. but you have to really actually be able to break up with the scale.
  • hdkerr
    hdkerr Posts: 145 Member
    I just saw your post from Friday and umm you are looking pretty great! Enjoy this moment b/c you work hard to earn it.
  • Briko3
    Briko3 Posts: 266 Member
    People that post pictures generally pick the most flattering ones they have. Usually they don't look like that in real life. I know it sounds cynical, but how many times have you seen a profile picture and then at different angles, the person looks like someone completely different.
  • watfordjc
    watfordjc Posts: 304 Member
    Height and thighs. One you can't change, the other you can complain about being too big. Muscle mass and body fat distribution also come into it.
  • norcal_yogi
    norcal_yogi Posts: 675 Member
    lifting, astanga/vinyasa yoga, pilates
  • servilia
    servilia Posts: 3,452 Member
    Not trying to be mean here but one realistic possibility is that although you weigh less, you may have a higher body fat % which will make you appear bigger and somewhat flabby. It's called skinny fat. Workout and lift some weights :) it should help.
  • watfordjc
    watfordjc Posts: 304 Member
    People that post pictures generally pick the most flattering ones they have. Usually they don't look like that in real life. I know it sounds cynical, but how many times have you seen a profile picture and then at different angles, the person looks like someone completely different.

    You mean the cropped single frame of me from a 45+ minute video at 29.97 FPS? Nope, no reason I cropped that one out of the 80,919+ I could have chosen even though I now weigh less than when I took that video. Hmmm... if I I didn't hate animated GIFs so much I could've gone with that whole stroke.
  • DatEpicChick
    DatEpicChick Posts: 358 Member
    im a little over a week into insanity, and i dont 'feel' skinny fat... i just feel... fatter? idk? squishy? muffiny? i dont even know, i just dont look like THAT....

    i really want to buy a victoria secret bikini and rock it this summer, but i feel like unless i'm like in the teens and toned as F8ck, its just going to be all kinds of gross....

    i just dont understand how someone can weight 20-40 pounds more and look smaller i guess....
  • holothuroidea
    holothuroidea Posts: 772 Member
    The answer is heavy lifting to build lean body mass, and reducing BF%. But at this point you are just refusing to understand. Other people have told you already.
  • pixish
    pixish Posts: 79 Member
    Are you also taking into account, difference in heights?
  • servilia
    servilia Posts: 3,452 Member
    Are you also taking into account, difference in heights?

    This too. Makes a big difference in appearance, weight being equal.
  • DatEpicChick
    DatEpicChick Posts: 358 Member
    The answer is heavy lifting to build lean body mass, and reducing BF%. But at this point you are just refusing to understand. Other people have told you already.

    wow, nothing nice to say?

    i got it. body fat%, lifting. thanks. jesus. i'm not daft.
  • CristinaL1983
    CristinaL1983 Posts: 1,119 Member
    The answer is heavy lifting to build lean body mass, and reducing BF%. But at this point you are just refusing to understand. Other people have told you already.

    wow, nothing nice to say?

    i got it. body fat%, lifting. thanks. jesus. i'm not daft.

    To give you some numbers to put with it... I'm 5'7'' I have 122-124 pounds of lean body mass. At my goal weight of 150 (everything remaining the same) I'll have a body fat of 17.5-19%. Right now, I'm still over my goal but when I get there (and when I was there before) I have a good amount of muscle that gives a much better shape than I would have if I had less muscle and weighed less even at the same body fat percentage.
    :flowerforyou:
  • Lola_Rogers
    Lola_Rogers Posts: 107
    you just keep doing what you are doing.. when you first start insanity/lifting you don't get skinny cause first its fat (start) and then its fat and muscle (process ) and then its muscle (result) .. when its fat and muscle you feel bulky puffy bigger wider thicker..etc . rather than slender or skinny. thats what i exactly went through. thats temporary.. you will get lean and be able to walk around with your VS bikini :) and you look great by the way!
  • Iron_Feline
    Iron_Feline Posts: 10,750 Member
    Lifting. Heavy. Trading fat for lean mass. Do yourself a favor - toss the scale and pick up The New Rules of Lifting for Women.

    GL!

    QFW :bigsmile:
  • Lupercalia
    Lupercalia Posts: 1,857 Member
    In muscles! That's where. Lift heavy and get a hot curvy bod. :smile:
  • benum21121
    benum21121 Posts: 200
    There's a huge difference between thin/skinny and 'fit' with women. Fit women don't care about the scale number due to their physiques being traditionally different than thin/skinny. And fit is far more attractive than skinny!!
  • Skrib69
    Skrib69 Posts: 687 Member
    There's a huge difference between thin/skinny and 'fit' with women. Fit women don't care about the scale number due to their physiques being traditionally different than thin/skinny. And fit is far more attractive than skinny!!

    Quite right!! The fashion industry has a lot to answer for when they put skinny women on the catwalk, and I don't just the attendant eating disorders that are rife in the modelling world.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    To be honest, there will always be someone prettier, thinner, richer, better hair, car, boobs, whatever..... Who cares? You can do NOTHING about anyone else in the world, so there is no point comparing yourself... Just work on being the best you that you can be.
  • RoadsterGirlie
    RoadsterGirlie Posts: 1,195 Member
    I'm going to jump on the lift heavy band wagon.

    Not only will it change your body composition, but you will feel amazing.

    Regardless, from your pictures I think you look beautiful.
  • angieleighbyrd
    angieleighbyrd Posts: 989 Member
    I know EXACTLY how you feel. I'm 5'2 at 131 right now and i'm all flabby and blah (working on it) I see girls my height same weight that have rock hard abs. drives me nuts. I blame myself though. i didn't do enough strength while I was losing weight and I'm stuck in that skinny fat phase. I'm doing p90x though and my *kitten* is finally starting to firm up. In phase one it was so flabby it was smacking me in the back on the legs during plyo. I'll get where I want to be eventually and so will you if you work at it.
  • anaquay
    anaquay Posts: 150 Member
    To be honest, there will always be someone prettier, thinner, richer, better hair, car, boobs, whatever..... Who cares? You can do NOTHING about anyone else in the world, so there is no point comparing yourself... Just work on being the best you that you can be.

    ^^^ This :flowerforyou:
  • debdatchp
    debdatchp Posts: 3 Member
    I recommend looking at old pics of yourself and see how far you've come. 34lbs is quite an accomplishment and someday when those bombshells lose their figure, I bet they are going to have a harder time fixing it than you have. Keep up the good work and don't be so hard on yourself.

    If you're into alternative approaches, there is a book by Donna Eden called Energy Medicine for Women - she gives a number of workshops around the country if you wanted to go. In the book she explains that our bodies have a 'set point' weight, and that no matter how hard people try, they cannot get below that weight. HOWEVER Donna tells you how to stimulate a number of pressure points around your body (very much like acupuncture only w/o the needles), which will help change that set point. I've lost 15 of the 26 lbs I wanted to lose, and seem to have plateaued. I don't know if Eden's technique had anything to do with where I am now, I was at 136 when I started and am 'stuck' at 121... I am changing the set point I'd given myself from 120 to 110 and taking a couple of months and check my progress. This along with better eating habits, exercise and logging it all on MFP is sure to make a difference. Hope this helps!
  • lvmygsp
    lvmygsp Posts: 14 Member
    To be honest, there will always be someone prettier, thinner, richer, better hair, car, boobs, whatever..... Who cares? You can do NOTHING about anyone else in the world, so there is no point comparing yourself... Just work on being the best you that you can be.



    ^^^^OMG, YES. If you take nothing else away from this thread, take THIS.^^^ And, thank you, poster.
  • shivles
    shivles Posts: 468 Member
    Get in the gym with the boys and lift heavy, its the future!
  • quirkytizzy
    quirkytizzy Posts: 4,052 Member
    okay for real. serious question.

    i'm totally jealous, and its totally petty... and i know it. k?
    my goal is not to make anybody upset or make anyone feel... awkward?

    but seriously, i am 128 pounds... and i see all these BOMB gals who are like 140-150 and up, and
    they have WAY hotter bodies than i do... like bikini able...

    HOW does this happen?!

    i mean i know i have a little one and what not... but like where the hell are you hiding 30+ pounds?!?!?!?!

    i'm super jealous, and i want to know like from you ladies, is it just a complete different body build... or just mere fact that we are harder on ourselves than other people?... =\

    I have that same problem sometimes. A lot of them taller than me. I'm 5 foot. That extra 5 or 6 inches on them makes a big difference in how the weight looks.